Star Trek and characters belongs too Gene Roddenberry. Stark Trek into Darkness script belongs to Roberto Orci, Alex Kurtzman and Damon Lindelof. Cassia and her family belong to me. Title of the story created by my partner along with being my BETA
Chapter 9
Kirk lay in his double bed on his back, looking up at the white celling above him. His blue eyes open staring into the emptiness. Kirk's mind racing with thoughts of Cassia, Pike, revenge, his crew members along with his ship. He tried to sleep, tightly shutting his eyes, yearning to clear his troubled mind. Alas, the memories just came rushing back to him, he turned onto his left side hoping that repositioning may give him more comfort. Unfortunately, it was to no avail, he rustled in the quilt cover and went back to his previous position, his body was as restless as his mind. Despite all that had happened, his mind kept returning to Cassia. Kirk wished he had been truthful to Cassia after all these years, but at the same time he wasn't thinking straight. Kirk questioned whether he was lying to himself, he didn't want to hurt her by telling her his feelings for her if he himself, didn't know if they were real. Kirk needed to clear his head and think things over fully when his mind and heart were not consumed with rage and vengeance. When he was fully over Pike's death, had gotten his revenge on John Harrison and he was at peace with himself, then he'd be able think over his feelings for Cassia. If he still felt the same way then he would tell her the truth, but could he stay true? Would he miss all the fun drunken nights and one-night stands he had enjoyed for years? He really needed to think this over and make sure was not making a mistake, for both their sakes. Kirk did not know what was going on with his heart and mind at the moment. His mind was grieving over Pike but his heart was fluctuating with feelings over Cassia thinking over past memories between then both and Pike he could not think straight. All these memories and feelings were taking over, driving him crazy. It was perhaps harder for Kirk, he was so used to maintaining a cool calm control over situations, that he hadn't found himself enduring such overwhelming emotions for quite some time.
Kirk needed sleep but could not switch off and calm himself. What was he going to do? His body was fully awake Kirk with wild emotions and thoughts as he laid there. Maybe it might tire himself out if he continued like this? Kirk closed his blue eyes his hands gripping his damp blond hair, his hands got tangled in his hair, much like he was in his thoughts, letting out a loud grunt of frustration, trying to release the tension from his overactive, throbbing mind. He was overthinking everything and now it was causing him a headache. he could not calm down his brows frowning meeting in the middle. A drink might dull his mind and nerves getting up from his double bed Kirk made his way to the left side wall grabbing the empty shot glass. Pouring himself a whiskey drinking it neat he slammed the cup down harshly onto the wooden counter with a loud smack which echoed around the room. Kirk rested against it with both hands flat on the counter bending forward he felt the warm liquid go down his chest. Sighing loudly at the feeling, his body started to numb and empty as he heated up like a furnace from the beverage. Kirk felt a cool sweat go down his face and back. Smiling at the feeling as he tingled all over like pins and needles it created a pleasurable feeling to his head and penis. Kirk's mind now a quiet place and clear he slowly returned to his bed and climb inside it. The fabric had cooled in his absence, he gasped lowly and pulled the quilt cover over him his eyes feeling heavy as they slowly shut. Kirk could only hope he that fully recharged for his duties tomorrow as everything went black but, his mind quickly switched back on. Thoughts returned and danced around in his brain wildly changing franticly from one thing to another. He knew his mind was not going to shut down anytime soon and Kirk knew he would be up all night. All Kirk could do was lay there and hope he did not look like a sleep deprived zombie in the morning.
Cassia leaned back against Kirk's bedroom door her mind going wild with thoughts of what he said as her heart pounded. There was no way Kirk had feelings for her, he made it clear in school he did not feel the same way. Could it be that he made a scene too because he was unsure of what he felt? Or he was embarrassed by what he felt for her? Could it have been that over the years his feelings for her had grown to more, without her realising? Perhaps it could have just been because of the traumatic event with Pike. Cassia told herself it didn't matter. In her mind it was too late, she didn't feel the same anymore. The incident had caused her feelings to die down where he had hurt her so much from his actions. Cassia found it hard to look at him let alone talk to him for quite some time. Her heart did not pound nor did she get butterflies anymore. Just when she had rationalised her feelings, suddenly she became haunted by a thought: what if she was lying to herself? It occurred to her that she may have just supressed her feelings towards him. Fearful of what the answer may have been, she got up and got herself a drink. Breaking the cycle of thoughts, she sipped her drink slowly.
As she sipped her drink, she realised one thing she had to know was did he mean what he had just said. She remembered the day of the incident that Kirk was talking about very well. It was one that did not leave her mind although it still hurt her. She had learned to forgive but she couldn't forget and every fibre of her being wanted to know why he brought it up, after fifteen years?
As she continued to sip her drink, her mind was cast back 15 years to the incident.
* THE INCIDENT IN QUESTION
Kirk and Cassia went to the same school in Iowa she was six and he was eight years old. She had a huge crush on him that had grown over the years as they grew up together. The two had built a strong friendship and always hung out together during and after school. One day during playtime she plucked up the courage to tell him, she made him follow her onto the small green playfield. Fidgeting with her fingers, Cassia looked at the grass below he she mumbled lowly at first. Kirk frowned unsure of what she said, she quickly looked up, eyes shut as she shouted out to him.
"I like, like you Kirk!" Then looked away blushing her face as red as her ginger hair.
Kirk smiled at her and looked away. Suddenly, he burst out laughing as he looked back her. Cassia froze at his actions, feeling ashamed by her words and confused at his sudden fit of laughter.
Kirk's eyebrows had cramped upwards, eyes glazing over as tears of mirth began to form. Her bottom lip quivered as her tiny hands began to shake. Kirk continued to laugh Kirk then spoke up.
"Haha, good one Cassia! That was brilliant!" Wiping his eyes from tears that had fell from his cheeks from the laughter.
His chest began to hurt from the pain of his fit of laughter. He lowered his arms from wiping his tears from his warm cheeks. Cassia looked at the ground staring at the grass as she closed her green eyes. Her tiny hand curled into a fist which began to sweat as her nails dug into her skin. Her body heated with rage, internalising her anger she bit her bottom lip to try and stop herself from lashing out at her best friend. But his laughter kept ringing in her mind and the inhumane rejection had struck a harsh blow to her heart. She felt like a ton of brinks had crushed her feelings all at once as he stood there smiling at her. Her little fists shaking from her growing anger. Her body heat rising as her eyes stared to sting from trying to supress her tears, which had begun falling onto the grass below. Panting heavily, she let go of her bottom lip as Kirk spoke again.
"Ah you really are a funny girl Cassia s-" Kirk stopped his speech as he saw her whole body shaking opening his mouth to speak.
He got cut short by a vicious blow to his left cheek as she slapped him harshly across his face. The impact so powerful that it made his face look right leaving a raw hand print on his left cheek. As she ran off, tears streamed from her eyes, her right-hand throbbing rapidly, stinging from the blow she had delivered bright red. She ran past everyone else as they played games of, skip rope, hopscotch, football and hide and seek. It was then that, Kirk realized that it was true as he looked back at her. Watching her holding his bruised burning cheek with his hand he knew. She did have a crush on him although he apologized for his actions. It took a long while for her to forgive him in a about a week. The two began to re build their friendship again, over time, she did and their bond got stronger.
To this day Cassia still had mixed feelings over the incident. It caused her great pain thinking about it, it wasn't long before her mind took her to earlier memories of her family and upbringing in Iowa...
Throughout their childhood, Cassia and her brother were born and raised in Iowa which had landscapes of rolling plains and cornfields. Iowa was home to a number of parks, museums, shopping malls, schools and numerous landmarks such as: Iowa State Capital, Grotto of the Redemption, Adventure Land, Field of Dreams and the Iowa State Fair which attracted millions of people all over the world. However, Cassia and her family lived many miles away from all the attractions. Her family had been farmers for generations, they lived in the rural part of Iowa where they and the other farmers grew their crops, eggs, vegetables and meat. If their family ever left the area it was to buy food and provisions for the month.
Unfortunately Cassia was never allowed out of the area, she wanted to go and see out beyond the area to see the buzz of life in the city. However, her parents were very protective of her and Stephan they restricted them from leaving the farm, prohibiting them from venturing any further than the houses at the end of the street. There were only a few houses in the rural area, it was filled with large farms for the families in the village. Over time the urban houses, parks and shops expanded from the outskirts of the city into the rural areas, slowly taking over the farmlands. One by one the farmers were being bought out to create more housing to develop the city. It was drawing nearer to the village where they lived and there was a growing sense of concern regarding their properties and livelihood. Having sold their produce for many generations on the markets and too see it disappear by shops it was a worrying situation for the village. But there was not much they could do as the Urban society were getting closer to them and mingling with their people. Many of the villagers had accepted the new ways of shops and interreacted them. However, Cassia's mother grew extremely paranoid that they would lose their farm and forbid Cassia and her brother from venturing near the city.
Cassia would always try and go to look at the new housing and see what the other people were like but would stop worried. The area was large and very different from her farm and the surrounding village she was used to. Each day she would venter further than the other, slowly pushing her mental boundaries. One day she made it all the way to the end of her street and standing on the new one. She looked seeing the new houses, green grass, vehicle's and people walking past. She stood taking in the view, each time her heart pounding in excitement as she breathed in the air watching the people go about doing their daily life and the children playing games. She wanted to join and live a different life one day. Instead of milking cows, collecting eggs, picking fruit and vegetables, planting seeds and cleaning the farm every day. She wanted to play tag, football or go on the swings like the other kids, but knew one day she would have to take over the family business like her mum. Letting out a long sigh green eyes wide, people looked at her, Cassia stood still letting the breeze blow her ginger locks away from her eyes. No one stopped to ask her if she was okay or lost, instead just carried on walking. She wanted to see more of this new place, but her mother's punishments and words had stuck with her for so long, that the sentiments immobilized her body, stopping her from being able to break their rules.
Her mother's punishments would be a smack across the butt or a whack with her ruler however, if her mother was in a bad mood it would be with a traditional carpet beater, making it extremely uncomfortable to sit down and undetectable to the outside world. In her discomfort, she would be forced to do choirs till midnight on her own without any help from her family. To further conceal her wounds and prevent infection, she would also be forced into a salt bath. Despite the excruciating pain, her mother would convince her she was doing it out of love so that she would not be infected.
This cycle resulted in her turning around and going home. Her mother would always ask where she had been, to which she would reply "Just out for a walk." Although she would believe her but when the habit became more frequent, she restricted her walks. Cassia was made to spend more time at home doing chores and helping around the house less time to have fun and play outside with Kirk or her brother Stephan.
Cassia sighed lowly closing her eyes as she held her glass of drink walking to the large window, looking outside. Recalling the incident with Kirk and the events from her childhood had broken her train of thought. Cassia stared deeply into the dark blue sky, the white stars sparkling brightly, she smiled at them chuckling lowly to herself. Taking another sip of her drink she thought of her father and brother being the two brightest glowing stars thinking they were trying to communicate with her somehow. A part of her thought it was them letting her know they missed her and were always watching over her. She let her head gently hit the glass with a soft thud looking out into the dark abyss before her she let herself get lost in the stars.
Her mind began to wander. All of a sudden, she began to realize that her and Beverly's childhood were very similar. Cassia had once asked her mother what her upbringing was like. At that time, her mother told her that her childhood was a happy one. However, when the subject was breached just before her father died, he gave a very different answer. Her father was a very honest man and Cassia knew that her mother must have been lying. Cassia began to realize just why her mother had changed as she grew up and acted like a bitch to their father. She respected her dad for putting up with it for so long and was grateful that she found out the truth from him. Cassia started to remember what her father had told her.
Beverly had a terrible abusive upbringing she was abused by her father as he wanted a son to continue on the family farm but had a daughter. So, he smacked her with a wooden cane or the traditional carpet beater whilst her mother did nothing. Beverly would go on to do the same to Cassia, out of conditioning. But unlike her father, she tried to restrain her desires to hurt her daughter. Beverly was forced into an arranged marriage Beverly's father made a contract with a very wealthy family who were interested in their farm which happened to be Gilroy Blake's family. The two were set to marry when they turned sixteen, but it did not happen. She ran away and went off to study at the Academy in San Francisco, using the money she had saved up over the years.
Not wanting her to lose out on her youth life to a married life. Unbeknown to Beverly, Gilroy was awaiting her at the academy and had anticipated her escape. He had left her favourite exotic flowers in her quarters with a note simply saying "he understood". Beverly was not happy about the situation at first, but a part of her was touched by his efforts. Over time they formed a connection together, eventually, she agreed to their marriage, though she was still conflicted. Beverly studied at the Acadamy till she turned pregnant with Gilroy's child. She was still of a young age when she fell pregnant and she had to give up her dream of being in space as a result of the pregnancy.
She returned home to her parents who were unhappy she got pregnant before marriage breaking their father's favoured tradition. Beverly was forced to raise their child by herself whilst Gilroy was out in space. When Gilroy returned to see her, they were forced to marry due to the contract and a few years later she was pregnant again with Cassia who was unwanted as Beverly had only planned to have one child. She treated her very differently to Stephen. Beverly raised Cassia similarly to how she was brought up, combining her love with hate, reminding her she was never wanted. Cassia however, studied hard and eventually achieving her goal of going off into space. Unlike her mother, she managed to live her dream which Beverly did not. Her daughter's achievement made Beverly even more resentful of her. Angry that she could not be where she wanted to be and unable to return to it through time and circumstance.
As the years went on Beverly's personality worsened, she became mean, cruel and snobby, only taking pride in herself. Brought expensive items with their shared money and money made from selling her family farm she did not care about him or the kids. She was never around for them, always too busy. Beverly spent her time doing whatever she could to distract herself from her lost dreams. This usually resulted in her doing chores on the farm and delegating chores to her children and losing herself in the traditions she had hated in her father. She talked down to Gilroy demanding attention whenever he contacted her. She put on a show in front of people in the village, pretending she was a caring and giving mother, making her family happy and showering them with love. But at home she went back to her usual self. She hated Gilroy for making her raise the kids alone by herself, feeling void of any attention or worth. Whenever he left for his missions, she wanted to make him pay for not spending time with her and she did so.
Chapter 10 May
Sorry for the delay with uploading was having a few a bit busy however this story will now be updated every month instead of every two months! The next chapter will be the last back story for a while so now the story will be getting further into the plot. I hope you enjoyed the chapter please leave feedback I am always happy to know what people think of the story :)
Till next time CherryKunoichiTenTen
