Did you really think we'd make you wait for days? We are evil, but we aren't cruel.

We'll save the notes for the end – we know what you want to get to….

As usual (shoot!) not ours.

Chapter Nine: Fanning the Flames

Heat – E

Bella was in my shower.

It was only mid-afternoon.

She said she loved me.

In my shower. Wet.

I almost asked if I could join her, but she really was cold, and it was only three in the afternoon.

If she'd been wearing those boots, I wouldn't have been able to resist.

I distracted myself by heating hot chocolate and preparing a plate of cookies.

It wasn't actually enough of a distraction. I kept going back and forth between the two images: Bella in the snow completely winded and flushed, looking me in the eye and saying the three little words that made it all so real.

The other image was Bella in the place I'd spent the most time fantasizing about her. I could see the drops of water trailing down her back. Her chestnut hair made even darker while wet, laying against her milky skin.

The images were two halves of a whole. I hoped this weekend we would put the pieces together—emotional and physical. I wanted it. I wanted her. I chose to stay at my apartment for one primary reason. I knew we could be ourselves here. Just you and me, I promise. The rest of the world didn't exist. In that mode, we had never once struggled with the right course of action; the pieces had always been a perfect fit. I'd never handed over control easily, in any context. And it wasn't that I was ceding power to Bella. Neither of us was entirely in charge of the situation; it was more that we trusted each other. We trusted us. As long as that held true, I could handle whatever else happened this weekend.

Ultimately, only one thing was an absolute . . . I would wake up next to her tomorrow morning. My bed would know her warmth. My sheets would be saturated with her scent. I would have my dose of hope before I even saw the light of day.

Of course, she was naked in my shower, and I would love to be there with her at some point this weekend.

I had just pulled the marshmallows out of the cupboard when I heard her pad into the kitchen. I looked up and froze.

She was wearing my shirt. The sleeves were rolled up, and the top three buttons were undone. My gaze scanned down to see that she wasn't wearing pants. I hadn't seen her legs like this in months. Not since the weather turned. I'd forgotten just how sexy they were. I was struck by the contrast of her perfect curves and her long wet hair, the epitome of femininity with my completely masculine shirt. I had no way of knowing what was underneath. I probably stared too long, but then again when a woman walks around your apartment looking like that, she's hoping you won't stop looking. And I couldn't.

"You've been busy," she said while grabbing a cookie from the plate on the counter.

I handed her a mug of hot chocolate. I turned one corner of my mouth up in a sly smile, and asked, "Didn't I tell you to dress warm?"

"Strangest thing. It felt hotter when I got out of the shower." She hopped up on the counter top, and crossed her legs.

"I turned the heat up." I said as I walked over, and uncrossed her legs, so that I could stand between them. "And so did you."

I planted soft kisses along her neck, pulling away the collar of my shirt for better access. I could feel her swallowing the bite of cookie she'd taken.

She set her mug down on the counter beside her. "Did you know chocolate is considered an aphrodisiac?"

I used my tongue to trace her collar bone. "I believe I may have heard that somewhere."

She had one hand resting on the kitchen counter, while the other was tangling itself in my hair. She turned her head, indicating I should move to the other side.

My hands were busy massaging her thighs which felt like silk. She'd been leaning back so I could fully explore her neck, but she sat up straight, and I raised my head. Both of her hands went to the sides of my face. My knees were shaking so I braced them against the cabinet. I gripped her hips tighter for leverage. "You look amazing in my shirt," I whispered.

"I bet you look amazing with no shirt," she answered. I took it as a cue. I slid my hands under her bottom and lifted her up. She hooked her legs around my waist and brought her lips to mine. When she did her signature move with my bottom lip, I growled.

As our tongues greeted each other, I began the slow walk down the hall toward my bedroom.

Flame - B

As soon as Edward sat me down on his bed, the nerves came roaring back full force. I wished to god I had never Googled him. I would have been okay if it weren't for the pictures of him with those women. Tall, blonde, perfect. I am not any of that. How could I ever compare?

I pushed the images of Edward with super models and starlets to the back of my mind, and focused on unbuttoning his shirt. My angle of attack and the fact that I was working backward were a disadvantage, so I gave up on subtlety and tugged, which might have ripped a few buttons loose.

He inhaled sharply against my neck.

"Impatient?"

I didn't answer, concentrating instead on pushing the shirt down his arms. He shifted, withdrawing one arm, then the other.

"Better." I whispered as I ran my fingers slowly up his back and across his shoulders. Just a few weeks ago I had fantasized about doing exactly this. I could feel him shiver as my fingers passed lightly over his ticklish spot. His reactions gave me a little more faith, like a physical declaration that he wanted to be here, that he wanted me. That I was good enough.

He loves me. Stop being mental.

Edward began working on my shirt, slowly trailing his hand inside the placket as he popped each button free. Every touch made me quiver. Every time he withdrew made me want more.

He had all the buttons undone now, and was tracing slow paths across my body. Around the hollow at the base of my throat, down, between my breasts, across my abdomen, along my hip bone. Innocent, slow paths that tied my heart up in knots. They were in good company with those butterflies in my stomach.

Edward pushed the shirt away from my shoulder, and resumed tracing. Along my collar bone, down my arm, to my side, back up my body again, just barely glancing my breast. It was like he was trying to memorize every part of me. I kept my eyes closed. I didn't want to see him studying me. I didn't want to misinterpret an expression. With my eyes closed, I could enjoy the sensation and close out the apprehension of how I compared to every other woman.

He continued tracing, periodically kissing a spot along his path. It was a slow form of torture, but it felt like heaven.

"I don't know if I can handle this," I whispered as he repeated the circuit. He immediately paused.

"We can stop, Bella. It's okay."

"That's not what I meant, Edward." I pulled in a ragged breath. "Enough with second base. Hurry up and steal home, would you?"

Fade - E

"I have to get to third before I can steal anything." I continued trailing her breasts with my hand, but I dipped my head down to run my tongue along her stomach. Tasting her bare, sweet skin sent that place in my not quite stomach into over drive. I stole a glance up at her.

She was leaning back with her eyes closed.

"Oh God, You have absolutely no idea how long I've wanted to do this." The minute it came out my mouth my eyes flew to hers. They were open and confused.

I sighed.

I sat up and then leaned down on my elbow next to her. I kept one hand just below her breast so that my thumb was resting up against it.

"I should have told you this before, and it's for the best that it came up before we go any further."

"Edward? What?" She actually looked a little worried. I couldn't imagine what was going through her head.

"That day in the coffee shop wasn't the first time I saw you."

"I don't understand. I would have remembered meeting you."

"We didn't. But I saw you. Every day. At the window."

Her brows furrowed in consternation. "For how long?"

I looked down, away from her intent look. And I saw her body, completely vulnerable to me. It forced my eyes back to hers. "Six months."

She bit her lip. And waited for more.

"The first day I saw you, it had rained. You were wearing those yellow rain boots of yours. You mouthed a song as you stopped in front of the window." I couldn't help but smile even now at the image. "You just . . . I don't know. You're so beautiful, Bella. I don't think you have any clue what you do to me. I came back from L.A. very jaded, but you were a bright spot. You're so different from this world I live in. You're alive. You're real. You're everything I've wanted and a lot of things I didn't know I needed. And it scared me. It still does sometimes.

"Why didn't you talk to me sooner?"

"There were a couple of reasons. The first I've since discounted. I worried that you wouldn't live up to my fantasy, that you weren't as good as I thought. I was wrong about that. You're better." I couldn't help glancing down at her exposed form briefly. "You're too perfect for my world, Bella. I was afraid we'd ruin you."

"You thought I was too perfect?"

"I still do."

"You have a warped perspective Cullen."

"Eye of the beholder, Swan." I let it soak in a minute before I said what was most important. "I'm sorry I didn't tell you sooner."

"I'm not." She paused, running her hands through her hair and laughing at something, although about what I was unsure. "I mean, yeah, it's good to know, but it's a bit intimidating hearing that you've been idealized for the last six months."

I'd never known anything quite as trustworthy as "us." It was as if those three magic words were a shield, making us invincible even against our own mistakes.

"I love you, Bella."

"I love you too," she said as she pushed me back on the bed. "Even more so when you crack out crazy things like that."

Combustion - B

He had been watching me for months. Afraid to approach me, or at least the idealized notion that he had of me.

He thought I was too perfect for his world.

There is an absolute irony in the fact that I had been second guessing myself on exactly that detail.

Deep down I had been worried that this would be some frivolous, throw away thing for him. That I might not be able to live up to his expectations, or to the women in his past.

My fears couldn't have been further from the truth. He loved me. He wanted me. He needed me.

All the nerves, all the worries about not being good enough, pretty enough flew out the window. For the first time in the short tenure of our relationship, I felt like we were on equal footing, neither of us having the advantage over the other.

I trailed my fingers over Edward's stomach, following the same tracing patterns he had used on me, with very similar reactions. It made me feel even bolder, more of an equal. It was my turn to explore, to learn, to memorize.

I am comfortable with sex, but this was a whole new world. Sex had always been a carnal interaction, the effect tied to how good a touch might feel as it ultimately led to a physical release.

But now, here in this room, it was more than that. It was about how Edward responded to me. About how he made me feel emotionally as much as physically. For once, it was about more than my enjoyment.

Sure, I'd had sex before. But I don't think I've ever made love to anyone. Definitely not 'with' anyone. That is what I desperately wanted here, with him.

I traced lower, grazing the top of his jeans. I had to laugh when I noticed the logo on the button. I gave a tug to pop the buttons free as I stretched up to whisper in his ear.

"Lucky's Edward? Do you think you need luck?" I teased.

"Oh god what you do to me, Bella" He hissed. My confidence grew with every reaction.

He. Wanted. Me.

He had been watching me for six months. He had fantasized about me. No one else. Me.

"I don't think you need luck." I continued tracing as I nuzzled into his neck.

"I think we make our own luck." He drew in a sharp breath as my finger skimmed under the edge of his boxer briefs.

"Off please." I whispered in his ear. He laughed and shifted his hips, helping me push his jeans off.

"So what was that you were saying about third base?" I inquired as I continued tracing, lower and lower. My hand shook a bit, the only betrayal of my nerves.

"It's…" he broke off as I slipped my hand up behind his neck and tugged him back on top of me. I needed the contact. I wanted to feel the weight of his body. There was too much space between us.

His hands braced on either side of my shoulders, holding himself slightly elevated, as if he were afraid to crush me. He continued to hold himself above me, studying my face.

"What?"

He broke into one of his stop the world smiles. "I never thought I would see you like this. I want to hold onto the image for as long as I can."

Slowly bending his arms, he closed the distance between us.

He skimmed his nose along my jaw, followed by a slow trail of kisses down my neck and onto my chest. His hand slid back inside my shirt, slowly tracing the outline of my breast. The sensation was unbelievable, and I found myself arching into him, trying to bring him closer, trying to prompt him on.

Please want what I want.

His touches became less hesitant, as if my reaction to him was enough to remove the doubt. He resumed his exploration of my body, tracing and stroking, his breathing becoming as erratic as mine.

When his fingers began trailing up the inside of my thigh, I instinctively shifted my leg a bit to the side. He hesitated at the motion.

"Oh god, please don't stop now." I gasped. He was teasing me, and he knew it.

"Hmmm." He whispered in my ear. "Looks like Coach is waving me home."

Inferno -E

Only I didn't feel much like sprinting home. Bases were loaded; the player at bat had the highest average. It was a walk. I could take my time.

I liked where things were going before my confession. So, my mouth found its way back to her nipple, and my hands went lower, sliding the boxers she was wearing down. She lifted without being asked and shook them off.

I couldn't help but take time to enjoy the view. She was lying on my bed. My shirt still on her, but barely. Her legs hanging over the edge. One hand gripped my arm, and the other was holding on to the duvet. Her lids were heavy, but not from sleep.

"I feel like I've never done this before." I breathed into her ear. In a way, I hadn't. I'd never made love to a woman, not like this.

With that, we exploded. A symphony of sensations rang through the room as we touched and tasted, inhaled each other and moaned with pleasure. We bumped noses and laughed. I can't remember how or when but there were no more clothes, no barriers between us.

Our explorations were no longer tentative. I learned her body's secrets, and she discovered mine. Lips on necks. Tongues on legs. Hands in all the right places. Fingers entwined. A myriad of sensation. Her mouth found a spot I didn't know existed, and I hummed, "Bella . . ." We were desperately aroused, but thoroughly enjoying the wind up. I wanted . . . I needed to bring the halves together, to know what it felt to be whole.

I was burning from the inside out. I knew only one thing would put out this fire. I waited until she said it.

"I'm ready, Edward, We're ready," she urged me softly.

I reached down to my pants which had been discarded to the floor.

"Aren't you the good little boy scout? As long as you kept your pants near, you were prepared." I ignored her teasing, but I flashed a knowing smile. Why pretend I didn't hope for this?

I stood at the edge of the bed dragging my hands down her legs. I hooked my arms under her knees and pushed them up toward her as I leaned in to kiss her. Our lips made contact at the exact moment I finally slid home.

Embers - B

"Edward..." I was incapable of forming a coherent thought. He pulled my leg further up, bringing it to rest against his hip. His fingers trailed back down my thigh, and I gasped in reaction. It was like sensory overload, and I never wanted it to stop.

"I wanted you from the first time I saw you…" he breathed in my ear.

He pulled back so that I could see his face. He never broke eye contact as he pushed back into me. My instinct was to close my eyes, give into the feeling of him inside me. But I couldn't look away from him, I couldn't break the connection.

Oh dear god. That recognizable knot began to form in my stomach, an allusion of what was to come. But that was nothing familiar about what he made me feel. What he did to me.

"Pure…" he withdrew again, never breaking eye contact. "…Joy." And he thrust back into me.

That one effortless statement, combined with the intensity of our physical connection, brought everything crashing together. Our emotional bond had become so strong so quickly. The sexual attraction was as ferocious as it was passionate. His declaration intertwined the two. Nothing would ever be the same after this. I would never want, need or love anyone like I do him.

Want was no where near strong enough of a term. I couldn't get him close enough. I couldn't move fast enough. Every action, every motion he made brought about a similar, just as violent reaction from me. I had spent the entire week trying to imagine what this would be like. How could you ever begin to imagine what you've never known?

"So perfect..." he whispered.

And with that, any grasp I had on control was surrendered. Nothing else existed but the two of us. I wrapped my arms around his neck, holding on as tightly as I could as I lost myself. Edward wasn't far behind.

We lay there in the aftermath, struggling to catch our breath, incapable of speech. Words would not have done the moment justice. We both knew that.

We started as a spark. A frisson of attraction, which ignited into the brilliant, bright burn of first love. But that bright blaze is short lived, and the heat it provides is shallow. It will either move into a slow, progressive smolder, or flame out all together.

The blaze of first love is wonderful. With Edward, it was breathtaking. But embers lead to a greater heat, a longer, slower burn. I willingly let go of the bright flame, happy to settle into the warmth, the duration, the completion of what I felt in this moment.

I brushed a lock of hair away from his forehead so that I could kiss his temple.

"Thank you." Edward whispered.

"Why are you thanking me? I think that was a joint production." I teased, trying to lighten the tone as I heard the questioning, the doubt that had crept into his voice. This should make us stronger, not raise questions.

I felt him exhale against my skin.

"Edward, look at me."

He didn't move. His head was burrowed into the bend of my neck. He began to trail slow kisses along my shoulder, and it felt wonderful.

"Edward, look at me." I shifted my hips, forcing him to roll us to the side. I kept my leg wrapped around his waist to prevent him from pulling away.

His eyes were guarded, and I could see him starting to pull back into himself. What had happened to him to make him so distrustful?

"Don't go getting all mental on me now. Last time I checked, I was the girl in this relationship."

He gave me a low chuckle, but it didn't reach his eyes.

"I love you Edward. Not an easy, fleeting kind of love. I really love you." He started to lean back into my neck, but I pulled back, my hand on his chest. "No more hiding, no more doubt, okay? You and me against the world. That's the way it works. You have to believe in that."

I watched his face, waiting for it to sink in. It had to sink in. He had to believe in us. It was the only way we would work.

Warmth - E

"Bella, that was just . . . I've never . . . I don't know . . . it won't be easy when we go public, and that's what scares me. I want to stay like this forever—just us, but people are so shallow and cruel; even my own father. I don't want anything to come between this, between us." I brushed my lips against hers. I needed to feel that connection. "But I think I can handle anything if you are with me."

She sighed loudly, in relief. Then she stretched and her wrists cracked.

"Do you need anything?"

"I wish I didn't. I don't want to leave the bed, but I am feeling pretty hungry. We never had lunch."

"Don't move. I'll be back in a flash."

Opting for simplicity, I pulled my boxer briefs off the floor and slid them on.

"Oh, now that's a look," Bella called out. I turned around and winked at her.

I had a tray of cheese and fruit already prepared in the refrigerator. It was supposed to be an appetizer, but it would work for now. Before I went back in the room, I took a minute to catch myself. I stood in the kitchen, hands braced on the counter trying to put together some reaction to what just happened.

But all I felt was calm. It was the complete absence of fear, of anger, of worry about whether Bella would fit in. There was nothing to process or try to understand; I didn't have to figure anything out. For once, I just knew.

I added bottles of water and wine to the tray, balanced it on one hand, and pulled two wine glasses into the other.

I'd much rather be in bed with Bella, not having to think about anything but feeling damn good.

"Wow, you really are a boy scout aren't you?" I noticed she'd put my shirt back on.

"Nah. No scouts in prep school. I hurried because I expected you to fall asleep. You do have a pattern."

"Well I might not last long tonight either. You wore me out today." She had a sheepish grin.

"We can just relax tonight. No plans at all. We could watch a movie or something."

"Maybe, but I was kind of admiring that Jacuzzi tub of yours earlier. How about a bath first?" She bit her lip again.

I nearly choked on my own breath. When I was capable of coherent thought, I brought out the big guns smile, "Any chance you brought those boots of yours?"

Happy - B

I talked a big game, but I never could resist when he turned on that smile. The Jacuzzi tub. The couch. You would have thought we were in our teens, not our late twenties.

About midnight, the phone started to ring. We were on the couch at that point. Edward chucked a remote at the phone, knocking it off the table.

"That solves that…" he mumbled before turning back to me.

We finally gave in around 2 in the morning. The best part of the whole day was curling up to go to sleep with him. And that's saying something. The exhilaration, the sex, the euphoria was amazing. The emotional connection, the sense of completion was indescribable.

Edward fell asleep before I did. There was enough light streaming in from the park to see the outline of his features. In sleep, he lost some of the tension that he carried day to day. He looked younger, more carefree. Like he had in the park earlier today.

No more, I thought to myself. No more worries, no more doubt. I'd take on the world for him. He deserved to be happy. We deserved to be happy.

I slipped my arm around Edward's waist and closed my eyes. We would be happy.

Smoke if you got 'em? Whew, yeah…

Lucy/Lambie – you can cross a question of your list I believe ;)

So what happens with these two? They seem pretty invincible, don't they? Is the boogeyman lurking out there? Ghosts of girlfriends past? Family meetings? What do you think?