A/N: This is a little fun piece that goes in to the days leading up to Dark Fury, a little smattering of some quality family time. Hehehehehehehehehe, coming from a very large family some of these little snippets are based on real life events, minus the whole drifting in space and presence of sociopathic killers of course. ENJOY!

Sabrina1204-like your way better, made more sense lol, hope you get a few chuckles out of this one, and by the by I got a doozy up my sleeve for the run in with Serenity, just you wait….

Carcrafter7-totally appreciated your honesty, and as I've said I agree in some ways, started your AU, just might take me a week or so : )

Pyrobabe7713: Thanks! It happens a lot, as we all saw in BnB my stories have a tendency to head off where so ever they please without even so much as a by your leave. Lol

CGandJaz: Welcome to the wonderful world of my insanity and thanks so much for your reviews! I'm a big Rayne fan myself and keep an eye out for something along those lines in the near future from me.

UBER THANKS TO GM_ANDY FOR HIS DARK FURY TRANSCRIPT, WITHOUT WHICH THIS WOULD HAVE BEEN IMPOSSIBLE.

Without further ado, you know the deal, ain't none of it mine, except a sparkling of what I hope is witty conversation.

RJRJRJRJRJRJRJRJRJRJRJR

Twelve hours post escape…

"Are you shittin' me? That's all we got? Survival pills?" Jack asked suspiciously eyeing the large circular red pill River dropped onto her hand.

"Beats starvin' to death kid," Riddick shrugged tossing his back.

"The Riddick is correct, death by starvation is," she paused and frowned, "unpleasant."

"How long 'til somebody finds us?" Jack asked still eyeing her pill critically.

"Don't know kid, depends." Riddick pushed down his goggles, and leaned back in the pilot's chair, propping his legs up on the console, "Just gotta wait."

"Depends on what?" She pushed.

"How the in the gorram hell should I know? Depends on how long it takes the next ship to go by, go to sleep kid."

"River?" Jack asked expectantly.

River frowned, "It is unreasonable to assume the girl is able to calculate the length of time before rescue or aid is received."

"Yeah but ain't you a psychic? Can't ya just look?"

"The girl is not a psychic she is a reader, predictions are precise calculations of statistical probabilities using observed psychological, sociological, and conscious thought patterns."

Jack quirked her eyebrow and looked to Riddick for interpretation.

"Means she reads people's minds and guesses what they're gonna do," he smirked.

"The girl does not guess, she calculates," River snapped.

"But you don't know so it's a guess."

River frowned, "The girl is never wrong, therefore it is not a guess, it is the solution of an equation she has successfully solved."

"Just 'cause you ain't been wrong before doesn't mean you won't be ever, still a guess," Jack pointed out.

River's frown deepened into a scowl.

"So can you make a guess?" Jack tried again.

"The girl does not guess." River hissed.

"Find," Jack rolled her eyes, "Can you calculate?"

River let out a sigh, "Given the current price of fuel, the average traffic flow through the shipping lanes, the probability of a ship passing near enough for our skiff to register on their scanners and the crew not being in cryo sleep, then factoring in the import and export needs of nearby inhabited systems, the girl believes three to five weeks. The water supply will empty in seventeen days and the survival pills will last for fifteen days, if the skiff temperature is lowered to ten degrees Celsius, the maximum survival rate without water is ten days, therefore rescue must occur within the next twenty five days or we shall die of dehydration."

"Sorry I asked." Jack sat back glumly.

River frowned and placed a comforting arm around Jack, well she hoped it was comforting, comfort was not something she had been trained in, "As my Jack has pointed out, it is only a guess and may be flawed."

"Thought you didn't guess," Riddick smirked, to which River scowled, "What?" He asked.

Twenty seven hours post escape…

"I'm so fucking bored!" Jack whined.

"Ain't been more than a day kid, get used to it."

"What? It's only been a day?"

"Twenty seven hours, forty six minutes, and five seconds." River corrected.

Jack snorted, "Guess I don't have to worry 'bout dying from dehydration 'iffin' boredom gets me first."

Riddick chuckled, "Ain't that bad kid."

River frowned, "Death by boredom not possible, insanity yes, boredom no."

"Wanna play a game?" Jack asked looking hopefully at Riddick.

"No."

"Please?"

"No."

"Why not, ain't like you got anything better to do?"

"No."

"River?"

"Don't wanna play with her kid." Riddick smirked.

"Why not?"

"She's a reader Jack, she cheats."

"The girl does not cheat." River said indignantly.

"Bullshit, how else do you explain twenty three games of chess?"

River smiled, "The girl is a genius."

Riddick snorted.

Twenty seven hours, five minutes post escape….

"I spy…"

"A carbon convertor," River yawned.

"You said you weren't gonna cheat!" Jack accused.

River looked up innocently, "The girl did not cheat."

"I didn't even give you the clue, 'iffin' you didn't cheat how the hell did you know what it was?"

River frowned, she needed to pay more attention.

Riddick chuckled from the pilot's chair, "Told ya kid."

"This sucks." Jack let out a dramatic breath.

Forty hours post escape…

"Jack," Riddick warned.

"I know what I'm doin'." She shot back, her head ducked into an access panel.

"Don't think you should be touchin' shit, just wait for River to get up."

Jack indignantly pulled her head out, craning her neck up to look at the standing form of Riddick, "Not all of us need the super genius to double check our work."

"Watch it girl," he growled.

"'Sides almost done," She ducked her head back into the panel, "Just gotta twist these last two.." Jack's words were cut off by the sudden jolt of electricity which shot through her body, "Fuck," she swore as the onboard lights began to die and they were plunged into complete darkness.

"Jack…" Riddick growled.

Forty hours twelve minutes….

The onboard lights hummed to life as River pulled herself from the access panel, "Please consult the girl before further attempt at electrical repair is initiated.

"Told her," Riddick said with a smirk.

River scowled at him.

"What?" He asked.

"The Riddick should not have allowed our Jack to injure herself."

"What?" He growled, "I told her not to fuck with shit while you were sleepin', ain't my fault she didn't listen."

River continued to scowl at him, "The Riddick should have stopped her, he is lucky the girl named Jack only mildly shocked herself, had she crossed the wrong wires total electrocution would have occurred, and the resulting surge would have blown all power on the skiff, we would have a deceased cub and a nonfunctional skiff."

Jack giggled.

Riddick growled, still not seeing how any of it was his fault.

"The girl is returning to sleep again," she pointedly glared at Riddick, "the Riddick and the girl named Jack will behave and refrain from touching things they should not."

"I didn't touch shit!" Riddick growled.

Jack laughed harder.

Fifty seven GORRAM hours post escape….

"Please?" Jack begged

"No."

"Please?"

"No."

"Please?"

"No."

"Please?"

"Fuck Jack, my answer ain't gonna change," Riddick barked.

"Can go on all day and night Big Bad might as well say yes." Jack smirked.

Riddick answered her smirk with one of his own, "Girl, remember who you're fucking talking to, you can sit there and please all you want with those goddamn puppy dog eyes, ain't gonna change a thing, puppy eyes don't work on Richard B. Riddick."

Fifty eight hours, forty seven FUCKING minutes post escape…

"Please."

"No."

"Please."

"No."

"Please."

"FUCK JACK! NO!" Riddick snarled and stood up to stomp away, only to be thwarted by a metal wall after ten feet. He growled at it.

"Please, please, please, please, please, pppllllleaaaseeee!"

Beneath his goggles Richard B. Riddick had the very first eye twitch of his life.

"Violence is unacceptable," River chided her from a pile of wires and components she had deemed unnecessary to the operation of the skiff. Riddick however wasn't so sure, it was a pretty small ship, there was no way there were that many "unnecessary" parts.

River glared at him for his thoughts.

Sixty GORRAM MOTHER FUCKING RUTTIN' hours post escape…

"I spy…"

"Metal."

"You're not even trying Riddick," Jack whined.

"Well, I don't know Jack, to my right, a fucking metal wall, to my left, a fucking metal wall, in front of me, a goddamn metal wall, behind me, oh wow, somethin' fucking new, a goddamn metal wall with a fucking window, ain't nothin' else to spy Jack!" He snapped.

"Jeeze, Big Bad who pissed on your survival pill this morning?"

Riddick growled.

"Finished!" River announced moments before Riddick put the girl through one said metal wall.

"What is it?" Jack eyed the cylinder shaped contraption with skepticism.

"A waste processor," River said proudly.

"Ain't drinking piss girl," Riddick growled.

"What?" Jack asked incredulously.

"The human body can sustain itself without food for a maximum of forty two days if it has water."

"So you're saying drinking our own piss buys us an extra month?" Jack asked eyebrow raised.

"Correct."

"Fuck that, if we're stuck on this boat for that long I'll just shoot myself." Jack snorted.

"Impossible, the girl used the last of the bullets."

"Fine I'll slit my wrists then, point is I'm not drinkin' my own piss."

River frowned, "It is no longer urine once it has been processed."

"Piss is piss girl," Riddick rumbled, "I'm with Jack on this one."

River scowled at the pair of petulant faces. "Fine, the girl will no longer waste her time on trying to keep her Riddick and her Jack alive."

"Good, why don't you put them parts back where you found them then." Riddick told her.

"They were unnecessary."

"Ain't nothin' unnecessary on a twelve foot skiff girl." He growled.

"Are you questioning the girl?" River growled back.

Jack took a step away.

"Ain't questionin' I'm tellin'."

"The Riddick is tellin' the girl?" She cocked an eyebrow.

"Ain't repeatin' myself girl."

River shrieked a torrent of Mandarin so colorful Riddick actually took a step back, "The Riddick wants the ship put back together so badly," She raised the recycler above her head and smashed it to bits on the floor, "He can do it himself!"

Riddick growled.

"Bi zui (shut up)! The girl will kill you with her brain."

"Wait?" Jack interrupted, "You can do that?" She asked wide eyed.

River leveled her gaze on Riddick, "Do. Not. Test. Her."

Seventy five hours post escape….

Riddick leaned back in his chair, and for the fourth time in two days began mentally cataloging everything in the shift which could be used as a makeshift weapon should the need arise, while River and Jack sat cross legged on the floor playing a game of Cat's Cradle, with one of his bootlaces.

"River, how many ways can you kill a man with a cup?" He asked swinging his chair around.

"Metal, glass, plastic, or foam?" She asked absently eyeing an evil string she could not bypass.

"You can kill a man with a foam cup?" Jack asked.

"Theoretically, but the girl has never tried, there is always a more efficient instrument of death than a foam cup."

"Huh," Jack shrugged.

Riddick was a mite curious as to the theory behind death by foam cup, but since they didn't have any foam cups on the skiff he stayed with the relevant, "Metal."

"Four," River answered without thinking.

"That's it?"

"Four main methods, the rest are all derivatives of the first."

"So how many with the derivatives?"

"Eighty seven."

"Huh," Riddick swiveled his chair back around.

"The girl will explain death by foam cup when the cub is otherwise engaged." River answered his unspoken thoughts.

"Hey! Thought you were gonna train me." Jack pouted.

"The girl will keep her promise, but death by foam cup is inappropriate, when you are older the girl will teach you."

"So what? 'Cause I'm fifteen it's okay to kill people in some ways but not in others?" She snorted.

"That is correct."

"That doesn't make any sense," Jack shook her head.

Riddick had to agree that it didn't make any sense either, but he had just gotten back on River's good side since the recycler incident and wasn't willing to cross the line again so soon.

"The Riddick is learning," River said with a smirk.

Riddick snarled.

Eighty nine hours, Eighty nine FUCKING hours…

"…the standard commutation rule for the creation and annihilation operators of a harmonic oscillator…"

Jack's eyes began to glaze over, for the last three and a half hours River had been giving a lesson in quantum radiation, she risked a glance at Riddick, whom she highly suspected was sleeping beneath his goggles and she hated him for it.

"The Riddick is not sleeping." River corrected her.

"Who said anything 'bout sleepin'?" Riddick asked.

"The girl named Jack assumed the Riddick found quantum radiation as unimportant as she did."

Riddick snorted. "You wanna pilot don't ya?"

"Not anymore," she whined, "Just shoot me."

"Suicide is an unacceptable method of avoidance towards one studies," River frowned, "The girl named Jack has much to learn."

Jack groaned.

One hundred-two FUCKING hours post escape…

Poke.

"What kid?" Riddick looked up from his monitors.

"Nothin'."

He quirked an eyebrow but turned back to his screens.

Poke.

"What Jack?" He rumbled, this time not bothering to look up.

"Oh, nothin'."

Poke.

"GODDAMN IT JACK WHAT?" He growled.

"Jeeze, no need to yell, standin' right next to you."

Riddick let out a frustration breath, "What do you need kid?" He asked through gritted teeth.

"Nothing." She smiled sweetly.

Growling Riddick turned back once more to his monitors, River, let out a sigh, and prepared to intervene.

Poke.

"JACK!" Riddick roared, followed by, "FUCK!" as he slammed his head into a control panel as he stood up.

Jack giggling hysterically dove immediately behind River.

"Fuck that Jack! Ain't no hidin' behind River." He snarled.

"Oh what ain't like you're goin' actually do anything to me anyway, River wouldn't let you."

"Wanna test that theory Jack?" Riddick asked pushing his goggles up.

Jack actually did not want to test the theory, and River thankfully intervened, "Violence towards one's pack mates is unacceptable."

Riddick growled.

"Ohhh, so scared Big Bad's gone all growly." Jack teased.

River fixated her glare on Jack, "The girl named Jack is not helping, it is unwise to provoke your alpha."

Riddick smugly smirked and took his seat, "Damn fucking straight."

River rolled her eyes.

Poke.

"GODDAMN IT JACK!" Riddick roared.

One hundred seven hours later…..

Poke.

"What Riddick?" Jack cracked one sleepy eye open, "We've been saved yet?"

"No kid, it's nothing, go back to sleep."

Jack yawned and rolled over.

Poke.

"What Riddick?" She half snarled.

"Nothing kid," he chuckled.

She pulled the blanket over her head muttering.

Poke.

Jack growled from beneath the blanket.

Poke.

"GODDAMN IT RIDDICK, I GET IT, IT'S NOT FUCKING FUNNY, LET ME GO THE FUCK TO SLEEP!" She snapped.

"Actually kid," He laughed, "it really is."

River rolled her eyes.

One hundred nine hours later….

"If the Riddick pokes the girl he will be short one finger." River said absently without opening her eyes.

Wisely Riddick retreated.

One hundred twenty hours later…

"Goddamn it Jack, shut the fuck up!" Riddick barked.

"Well excuse me for tryin' to pass the time, I'll just go back to counting fucking holes in the grating!" She snapped back.

"What did I say Jack? What? Shut the fuck up that's what."

"Oh go to hell Riddick!"

"ENOUGH! The girl has had enough! She will kill you both with her brain!"

Jack snorted, "Ain't even possible."

River swung around in her chair.

"Thought violence was unacceptable," Riddick smirked at her.

River released an ear rupturing shriek.

"Still here," Jack grimaced, "Deaf mayhap, but still breathin'."

"The girl was not trying to kill you with her brain; she was merely demonstrating her frustration with the two children aboard the skiff!" She snapped.

"Sure you was," Riddick smirked, "bet you really can't kill with a foam cup neither." Riddick had to do a double take, one of River's shivs implanted itself into the wall next to his head, he hadn't even seen her pull it, damn his girl was good.

"Say that again." River challenged, getting up from her chair and standing directly in front of Riddick.

"Said you can't kill with a foam cup," he growled at her.

River planted her booted foot into her Riddick's knee cap.

"FUCK!" He swore, losing his balance in the small space he fell over cracking his head against a pipe as he fell.

"Did you kill him?" Jack asked toeing the unconscious form of Riddick.

"Negative, he will sleep and the girl will have her peace."

"Um, think he's bleeding."

River looked down and swore.

One hundred ten hours later…

"Shit," Riddick groaned, rubbing his head, "What the fuck happened?" Why in the hell did his head and his knee hurt so bad.

"The Riddick tripped and fell, he should be more careful," River told him, a feigned look of concern on her face, and again she hoped it was concern, she would need to work on that.

Jack bit back her lip and turned away to avoid outright laughing.

Riddick looked from one girl to the other, something wasn't right, what the hell was there to trip over, and then, it all came back. "Fuck River, I thought you said violence was unacceptable!" He snarled.

One hundred twenty hours later….

"I wish we would get picked up, I wish we would get picked up, I wish we would get picked up, I wish we would get picked up…"

"What the hell are you goin' on about kid?" Riddick quirked an eyebrow.

"I've resorted to wishing on stars, since there's about a bajillion of them out there anyway, and ain't like there's anything else to look at." Jack sighed.

Riddick smirked, "Only been ten days Jackie-girl, got to work on your patience."

Jack snorted, "Oh and Mr. I'll-snap-your-neck-if-you-don't-stop-staring is gonna be the one to teach me."

Riddick growled.

"You are only furthering the girl named Jack's point." River chimed.

One hundred thirty seven hours…

"Hull breach contained, engines operating at one hundred and seventy percent." A cold mechanical voice declared.

"The girl knows this," River growled at the speaker next to her.

"What the hell did they hit us with?" Jack asked, yelling over the blaring alarms, as she strapped herself in.

River's fingers were frantically flying across the console, trying to force more power to the already overloading engines, "Retraction claw." She answered flatly.

Riddick growled as his fingers' matched River's pace.

"Engine and hull failure imminent under current parameters." The voice announced.

"Shut the fuck up!" Riddick snapped at the computer putting his fist through the speaker on his side.

"Violence against her will not encourage cooperation." River scolded him without risking a glance in his direction.

"Critical systems failure in five seconds…four seconds…"

"C'mon, c'mon, c'mon, piece of crap, give me somethin'!" Riddick snarled at the controls.

"Three seconds…"

"Fuck!" He growled.

River began to power down the ship.

"Two seconds… one second…"

The skiff's lights went dark.

"First you're a boy, and then you're a girl, and now a fucking psychic, careful want you wish for girl." Riddick said looking back at Jack. His attention then turning to River, who sat, head tilted and eyes glazed over.

"Unidentified craft, state your purpose and contents." Jack jumped as a voice blared over their comms.

"A savage place! As holy and enchanted, As e'er beneath a waning moon was haunted, By woman wailing for her demon-lover ! The Kubla Khan," River whispered, "She wants, she knows, soaked in blood that never touches her, soaked in blood that never runs, perversion, sadism, violence is beauty, art painted in death and frozen forever in time."

"Well that didn't sound at all ominous did it?" Jack quipped.

"Unidentified craft, state your purpose and content." The voice came again, more agitated this time.

"What's our options?" Riddick asked River.

"None, we must play her game for now, her game," River paused a small smirk forming at the corner of her lips, "our rules."

"Unidentified craft, state your purpose and content."

"They know who we are baby?" Riddick asked.

She nodded, "They assume, the Riddick's voice will confirm."

"Might as well play along then." He smirked.

"Unidentified craft, state your name and purpose."

Riddick smirked at River before hitting the comm. to reply, "Name's Johns, ship got scrapped on a transport run, only other survivors are onboard with me, 'sides that we got shit."

"They will find your lies," River whispered.

"Tell me, Mr. Johns," The voice came back over the comms, full of smug satisfaction, "What brings you to this lonely corner of space?"

"I'm a bounty hunter," Riddick smirked, and Jack had to bite back a giggle, it just sounded so wrong coming out of his mouth.

"Than it appears we have something in common." The voice answered back.

The skiff jolted. "They're reelin' us in!" Jack felt her chest tightened.

River released her harness and went to stand in front of Jack, "The girl will not allow harm to come to her Jack, the girl named Jack must believe this. Does she believe this?"

Jack looked up into River's eyes which were set with a firm and calm resolution, and she nodded.

"Jack, how long can you hold your breath?" Riddick asked.

Her head snapped up to Riddick, "Dunno, why?"

"'Cause we're about to find out."

"The girl named Jack will stay close." River told her.

"Real close," Riddick added as he flicked opened a lighter, "in fact until further notice consider yourself River-girl's shadow, it's me their lookin' for, let's let 'em think you're just a couple of skirts." He smirked.

River snorted, frankly she was offended. On one hand it was decidedly in her favor that her bounty listed no crime or information on her "talents", on the other it was insufferably infuriating that no one ever saw her as a threat. She was River M. Tam, empath, government trained, biogenetically enhanced, assassin not some bed dan (idiot) skirt.

"Easy River-girl," Riddick chuckled as he held the lighter up to the skiff's fire sensor, "promise you'll get to play too, ain't gonna make you sit on the sidelines, their game, our rules." A warning sensor wailed, "Hold your breath."

RJRJRJRJRJRJRJRJRJRJJR

Endnote: hehehehehehe, couldn't resist.

'Til after now.