Chapter Nine: After
There was the slow steady sound of beeping monitors and the smell of detergent, disinfectant, and citrus. Opening my eyes, I was met with white walls and dim lighting. Meaning to bring my hand up to my head, feeling groggy, I was met with immense soreness, immediately freezing and slowly relaxing till everything was resting on the bed once more. Closing my eyes, tears brimmed and slowly slid down my temples. For a moment there was just blackness, but then the sound of raptors filled my mind and pain and fear, making my eyes shoot open again.
From the hallway I heard angry voices, coming closer and closer to my room. Whoever it was stopped outside of it, continuing to argue. I finally recognized the voice as my father's. Once again feeling relief, I attempted to prop myself up onto my arm, ignoring the pain. I'd felt more pain than this.
"Dad?" I called out through a scratchy voice. He suddenly appeared in the room and I smiled at him. "Dad."
"Linzie." He said and rushing to my side, wrapping his arms around me. "How are you feeling?"
"Very sore." I replied, my voice already stronger. "Are you okay?"
"I'm fine." He beamed at me. "You're awake."
"Been out long?" I frowned at him. He just looked at me sadly. "What's going on? What happened?"
"You've been in a coma for two weeks." He told me sadly.
"Where is she?" Another voice said and Ian Malcolm came in on crutches, still in a hospital gown.
"Ian." I beamed at him. "You're okay."
"I'll be just fine." He smiled, sitting in a chair on my other side, quickly taking my hand. "You look much better."
"Thank you." I laughed lightly. "I feel like I got beat up by a bunch of dinosaurs."
He laughed and placed a kiss on the top of my hand. "You're gonna be just fine."
"I was scared." Alan told me with a somber expression. "The raptors really did a number on you."
"Yeah, well, I was protecting the people that I love." I told him with a smile.
"Linzie!" Two voices chimed as they burst into the room, both rushing and launching themselves onto the bed.
Hiding all the pain they had just caused me, I embraced Lex and Tim as tightly as I could, placing a kiss on both their heads. "You guys look good." I told them.
"You look much better." Lex smiled at me.
"I think you look like crap." Tim commented.
"Timmy!" Every adult in the room scolded.
Then another figure entered the room. "John." I said looking at him.
"You're looking well." He smiled.
"So I've been told." I smiled at him. "What's my diagnosis?" I asked my father.
"Severe blood loss with internal bleeding, as well as a magnitude of puncture wounds, lacerations, and bruising." He told me.
"Good. Nothing serious." I replied lightly. They all smiled at me but they were full of concern. "Guys, I'm fine. Just a bit banged up is all."
"From dinosaurs." Alan told me seriously.
"Better than a shark." I replied. "I hate sharks."
"You're making light of things." Ian told me with a slight frown on his face.
John assessed the situation, tensions rising, "Children, why don't you go get her some ice chips."
"Okay." Lex said looking at me. "Come on, Tim."
"Thanks guys." I smiled at them. Then I frowned at Ian. "How else am I supposed to act, Ian? Do you want me to fall apart and be terrified forever? Because that's not going to happen. I'm not wired that way." I told him and looked to John. "When are we allowed back on the island?"
"We're not going back." Alan told me seriously.
"What? We have to. Katie is on that island. My life is on that island." I frowned at him sitting up, feeling several wounds stretch in the process.
"Not anymore." John frowned at me.
Opening my mouth to retort, I found that no words would come. Instead I simply shook my head at them and leaned back against the pillows. Staring at the ceiling I fought the emotions that were coursing through me. I was afraid of what happened on that island. I was afraid of Sophie and the raptors. I'd wear the scars of that day forever and yet I loved it there. I loved that place and everything that lived on it. There was still Lilly and Katie and all the others that did nothing to harm us on that day. There was innocence there. Evil lurking to take it away.
Now it was abandoned. It was no more. It would just be seen as a mistake made by a crazy old man. If it had worked and this had never happened he would have been known as a great man. He would be revered for bringing dinosaurs back to the world. But now that it had failed he would only be seen as a failure. John Hammond was a great man. He had done something wonderful and was now going to pay the price for it. People had died. All the wonder he had done would be forgotten.
"Where's Robert?" I frowned, looking at John. Everyone remained silent and lowered their eyes from mine. All but John. "John, where is he?"
"Robert Muldoon was killed by a raptor while escorting Ellie to return power to the complex." He told me sadly.
Tears filled my eyes, my throat constricting, as I nodded at him. Tears fell as I continued to look at him. Just then Ellie came into the room, smiling until she saw my face. Slowly moving to Alan's side, they were all quiet while I mourned the man who was like a father to me. Soon everyone filtered out, except for my father and Ellie, deciding that I needed to rest and once again deal with loss.
"Are you in pain?" Ellie finally asked me.
"It doesn't matter." I told her, staring at the ceiling.
"Ellie." Alan shot at her but she seemed to ignore him.
"Is there anything you need?" She asked.
Looking at her with a deep set frown, I tried to keep my voice level. "What I need is for Robert Muldoon to still be alive. What I need is to rewind that day and to change what happened. I need a lot of things, Ellie Sattler. What I don't need is anything from you." It was harsh, I knew that. But I didn't need anyone asking how I was or if I needed anything. I needed to wake up from this nightmare. I needed Robert to be alive. Just so I could hear his voice once more.
Over the next several days I allowed only Alan access to my room. The doctors were refusing to let me leave. From what Alan had told me I was lucky for that. The lawn was littered with reporters eager to get the inside scoop. I wasn't going to tell them anything. I wouldn't give them the time of day. They were not going to exploit the ones who died just to make a good story.
"You're going to have to forgive Ellie." Alan told me late one night. "What happened to Robert wasn't her fault."
"I know." I told him, picking at a flaw in the blanket. "And I will when I get out of here. I knew Robert well. He wouldn't have let her go anywhere alone."
"From what John has told me, he loved you very much." He said sadly.
"And I loved him." I smiled with shimmering eyes. "He was like a father to me while I kept my real one at arm's length."
"How things have changed." He said taking my hand.
"Yeah." I smiled at him. "Despite all that's happened, it's still for the better."
"What are you going to do now?" He asked me.
"I don't know." I frowned at him.
The room was quiet, allowing us to hear the commotion in the hallway. There was yelling and broken speech as they tried to stop whoever it was. Then I recognized the voice.
"Where is she?" A male voice shot out. "Let me see her."
"You're aren't allowed to -"
"Let me see her!" He shouted.
"Will you go get him please?" I smiled at my father.
He smiled and went into the hall. In the next moment Henry came bursting into the room. I grinned at him while his expression was pained as he rushed toward me. Without being able to say a word, he kissed me hard and deep. Laughing as he wrapped his arms around me, I buried my face in his shoulder.
"You smell amazing." I smiled at him.
"You look amazing." He grinned back. "Are you okay?"
"I'm fine." I nodded at him. "Where have you been?"
"Trying to get here." He frowned. "We were pretty cut off of the world and once I found out what happened you'd already been here a week. It took even longer to get back with all the publicity that's surrounding the incident."
"Robert's dead." I blurted out. "And Katie's probably dead by now. They all are."
"You're okay. That's what matters." He said taking my head in his hands.
"It's all gone." I told him as tears brimmed again. "That's home and it's gone."
"We'll make a new home." He smiled and kissed my forehead. Nodding at him, I took a deep breath. "Move over." He told me gently.
Shifting to the side, he laid next to me, pulling me against his chest. The tears came hot and fast but I felt the most comforted than I had since it all happened. This is what I needed. He was what I needed.
Another week went by before I was finally released from the hospital. They snuck me out the back while the director of the hospital kept the press busy out front. A few stragglers attempted to get shots of me but Alan and Henry kept me well hidden as they ushered me into Henry's car.
"Where to?" Alan asked from the passenger seat, looking back at me.
"Henry's I guess." I frowned. "I don't have a home anymore."
The men exchanged a glance as I hunkered down, leaning against the window as Henry started to drive. They had me walking the halls everyday but having to rush out to the car and just the movement of it made me feel exhausted already. Not saying a word, I wasn't surprised to see Henry's house when we stopped, seeing the nice, well-tended yard. Getting out, I went inside while they brought everything in. Alan would be staying with us for a while. He wanted to be close and I wasn't ready to go anywhere else just yet. They wanted me to remain restricted from normal activity for at least a couple more weeks.
"Why don't you go lay down." Henry said gently rubbing my back. Nodding at him, he kissed my forehead, smiling sweetly at me. Walking down the hall to his bedroom, I crawled into his bed, hugging a pillow to myself. Shutting my eyes, I attempted to relax, but I rarely found any peace with my eyes shut. "She's depressed." Henry's voice drifted to me.
"As she should be." Alan told her. "She lost people she cared about. Not to mention her work and the dinosaurs that she raised from infancy. She lost a lot in just a matter of hours."
"How am I supposed to help her?" He asked.
"Simply be there for her. Let her tell you what she's feeling. Don't push her." My father replied. "At least that's what I'm going to try to do."
"You want to take her back to Montana, don't you?" Henry asked sadly.
"It's where she belongs. She can keep doing her work."
There was a long pause before Henry replied, "She'll decide for herself where she belongs."
Putting my hands over my ears, I didn't want to listen to them anymore. I didn't want them arguing about where I should go or who I should stay with. It was my decision, and I wasn't done fighting for the home that we left behind. Something good had to come out of all this. I just didn't know what it was.
Several months had passed and I had tried every avenue to get access to the island. I petitioned, I wrote and delivered letters, I attempted to gather a big enough following to make it happen, but as the weeks went by I knew there was no hope. But I couldn't stop. Despite what Alan and Henry said or did, I wasn't going to let them stop me. I had to get back to the island. I had to make sure the animals I cared about were still alive and surviving. Without lysine I didn't think they'd survive, but crazier things have happened.
"What are you doing?" Alan asked, pressing a kiss on the top of my head.
The sun had been down for hours but sleep wouldn't take me and there was too much work to be done. "I'm writing a letter to the Costa Rican government." He sighed and sat next to me. "You can say whatever you'd like. You can't stop me."
"I know." He said taking my hand.
"Dad." I frowned at him.
"Let me take you home." He frowned.
Relaxing for a moment, I cleared my throat and pulled my hand from his, "I'm not done yet."
"You're done." He nodded. "You've tried. John has tried. It's not going to happen."
Keeping typing, I stopped, staring at the screen as tears filled my eyes. Folding my arms, I bowed my head, shutting my eyes to try and hold back the tears. Raising my head to meet his eyes, tears slid down my cheeks. "Excuse me." I said and went to Henry's and my room, grateful that he was away for a few days.
Sitting on the edge of the bed, I started to sob. Falling backward, I curled into as tight a ball as I could muster, sobbing into the comforter. Sobbing until I couldn't anymore. Sitting at the head of the bed, I tried to think of anything else I could do. But there was nothing. No one would help me. Even the people I loved most wouldn't help me. John tried but at his age, even with his resources, he was the one who had caused the incident. The incident where people had lost their lives. Robert would have locked me away and not let me do any of the things I had. He'd tell me to forget about the island. Forget about it and go live a normal life.
"I'm trying." I whispered out loud.
That night I dreamt of him. He was in almost all my dreams. Only they were never happy. They were a constant nightmare about what happened on the island. I tried to save him. Tried to keep her away from him. But she always got her prey. She always ripped him apart as I stood and watched. No matter how much I fought, or how far I went, the result was always the same. He died and I'd wake up in a cold sweat. Every night.
Getting up, I splashed cold water on my face before going back out into the living room. Alan was still awake sitting in front of my laptop. "What are you doing?" I asked.
"Nothing." He said closing it.
"I'm sorry." I told him. "I know I'm keeping you from a lot of things. You don't have to stay here. You've been here long enough."
He just smiled and shook his head, "I'm not going anywhere."
"What about Ellie?"
"She's keeping the sight going for now."
"For now?"
He nodded and the smile on his face faltered, "It's not going well."
"It's not going well or she?" I asked sadly. He just smiled. "It's hard."
"Another nightmare?" He asked putting his hand over mine.
Nodding, I covered his with my other, heaving a heavy sigh, "They just won't stop."
"Robert?"
"Yeah." I confirmed with a tight throat.
There was a long pause before he spoke again, his tone lighter, "Lex and Tim have been calling. They'd really like to see you." He told me. "John too."
Looking at him, I nodded, "Maybe it's time."
"I think so." He smiled. "We need to get you away from here. Away from the memory of it."
"Okay." I told him.
"Are you being serious this time?" He asked with a raised brow.
Smiling, I nodded at him, "I am."
"Okay." He said as a broad smile moved across his face.
"I'll tell Henry when he gets home tomorrow." I told him, sighing before rubbing my face.
"Should I make some coffee?" He asked.
"You should sleep." I smiled at him. "I'll be all right."
"You only slept a couple hours."
Nodding, I smiled at him, "It's the norm."
"I can stay up with you." He told me reassuringly.
"Dad." I said sternly.
Standing, he looked down at me, "I'll make you a deal. I'll go to bed if you come lay with me."
"And pretend that I'm five-years-old again?" I grinned at him.
He just smiled and held his hand out to me. Sighing, I took it, following him to the guest room. We both lay down on our backs. For a moment it felt a little awkward, but then I actually felt a wave of relief. Putting my hand over his, I was going to say something to him, but he let out a soft noise, making me look at him. He was already sound asleep.
Leaning over, I placed a kiss against his cheek, "Night, Daddy." Rolling over, I fell asleep almost instantly. For some reason having my father close to me gave me more peace than I'd felt since the hospital.
Henry came home the following afternoon, to a stoic Alan and me. Worrying about how he would react to telling him that I was leaving, he took it better than I had thought. Telling me that it was the right decision and that we'd work things out. I wasn't sure if him being so understanding was a good or bad thing.
"Are you sure you're okay with this?" I asked as he helped me pack.
"We'll talk all the time." He told me. "I'm gone a lot with conferences and lectures and lab work. It'll be good for you."
Nodding at him, I sighed, "Okay."
Wrapping his arms around me, he kissed me sweetly. "I love you."
"I love you too."
Going back into the living room, I smiled at my father, who held his hand out to Henry, "Thank you for everything."
"Anytime, Dr. Grant." He told him.
"I think you can call me Alan." He smirked in response.
Smiling, I put my hand on Henry's shoulder, turning him toward me, wrapping my arms around his neck. "I'll see you soon."
Kissing me deeply, Alan let himself out, giving us a moment alone. Though the moment didn't last long enough. Letting him go, I grabbed my bags, leaving with a glance behind my shoulder at him. Getting into Alan's rental, we were off to the airport. Next stop: London.
Once we were there I couldn't escape the excitement I was feeling. I hadn't realized how much I missed John and the kids. Now that they were just a car ride away I couldn't help but feel happy. Alan smiled, taking my hand. Covering it with my other, I couldn't have been happier to have him with me.
When the car pulled up the long drive and John's mansion came into sight, I couldn't stop my jaw from dropping. "I don't know what I was expecting, but it wasn't that."
"I'm underdressed." Alan said as he looked at it.
Looking at him in his plaid shirt and blue jeans, I couldn't help but laugh, "You look fine. I'm the one who's underdressed."
"You're dressed the same as me." He said and gently shoved me.
Laughing, it was true. But at least we were comfortable. "Alright, let's go." I told him as soon as the car had stopped. I had barely taken a step out of the car when my name was being yelled. "Lex! Tim!" I yelled as I opened my arms as they collided with me. I couldn't help the tears that filled my eyes. "I've missed you guys so much."
"Don't cry." Tim said putting his hand on my face.
"I'm just so happy to see you." I told him.
Lex wrapped her arms around me tightly, "We're happy to see you too."
"Linzie." John said from the top of the stairs.
Smiling up at him, I let the children go, moving up the steps till I was in front of him. "John." I said before wrapping my arms around him. "I've missed you."
"And I've missed you." He said hugging me as tightly as he could. "Come; let's get you cleaned up before dinner."
"Okay."
Looking behind me, the kids were on either side of Alan. For a moment I thought he was back to his awkwardness around kids, but he embraced them, putting an arm around both of them as they did the same to him. Smiling at him, I focused on John as he led us up the stairs and to two rooms next to each other. The kids led Alan into one while John opened the door to the other for me. It was amazing. There was a four post bed, a bench in front of it, a vanity on one wall with a tall dresser on the other. There was a door I assumed was a closet and in one corner there was a small table with two chairs. It was the most extravagant room I'd ever seen and I was going to be using it. It was amazing. Going to one of the windows that were on either side of the bed, I looked out over the garden in the backyard. There was even a fountain.
Feeling a wave of emotion, I turned to John, "Thank you."
"No." He said shaking his head. "Thank you for coming."
"It was overdue." I told him. "How have you been? How have the kids been?"
He sat on the edge of the bed and patted the space next to him. Sitting down, I waited for him to reply, feeling like I wouldn't like the answer. "I've been well. I've been attempting to get back to the island just as hard as you have with no success."
He paused long enough for me to repeat my second question, "And Lex and Tim?"
"Alexis has been having nightmares. Tim as well but it seems that he is coping better than his sister." He replied.
"She's not the only one who's having nightmares." I told him sadly.
"I know." He said taking my hand.
"How's Tim's hearing? Any better?"
He shook his head. "He'll always have trouble but he's still in once piece, thanks to you."
"Thanks to my dad." I told him. "He's the one who went up for him."
"And you saved them both." He smiled.
Smiling, I shook my head at him. "You make me sound like some hero when all I did was survive. I mean, yes, I saved them, but they would have done the same for me."
"You make too light of things." He said shaking his head.
"Now you sound like Ian." I smiled at him.
"Someone say my name?"
His voice made me jump, looking to the door. Ian Malcolm stood in the doorway, leaning on a cane. Feeling tears well again, I stood and rushed to him, throwing my arms around his neck. "Ian." I said through my emotion.
"Linzie." He said hugging me tightly.
It took a long moment for me to let him go, "How are you?"
"Better now." He smiled. "How are you?" I shrugged and smiled at him, wrapping my arms around his waist, hugging his shoulders. "It'll take time." He said running his hand down my hair.
"Ian Malcolm." Alan's voice said from the hallway.
Letting him go, we both turned and looked at him. "Dr. Grant." Ian said holding his hand out to him.
"Good to see you." My father replied, though I knew he didn't mean it. Alan had never been fond of Ian and probably never would.
"Looking good." Ian told him with a smirk.
"I hear you've been trying to go public about what happened." I said looking up at him.
He met my eyes, his face serious until he smiled, "Let's not ruin the moment with talk about that place."
"Yes, let's eat." John added with a broad smile.
"Come on, Linzie." Tim said taking my hand.
Putting my arm around Lex, I let him lead me back downstairs and to the dining room. We were all seated before we were served the most lavish meal I'd ever had. Any meal I'd had with him before now was put to shame. Eating as much as I could, we talked and laughed and enjoyed ourselves. I hadn't had this much fun since my time on the island. It was nice to see everyone healed and happy. After dinner, the kids went off to do their own thing, leaving the adults to talk, meaning that everything we didn't want to say in front of them could finally be discussed.
"You asked me about going public with everything." Ian stated as we all sat in the den, sipping wine while a fire raged in the fireplace.
"I did." I told him.
"Needless to say, it's not going well." He replied. "And I hear you're trying to go back."
"My life was that island, Ian." I told him gently. "I put everything into that place and now it's gone."
"You can start over again." He frowned. "That island was a mistake."
"Ian." I shot at him, glancing at John.
He smiled, offering me his hand. Taking it, he looked at Ian. "It was a mistake. But we can learn from it. And we all could use a fresh start."
Frowning at them, I tried not to overreact but words were already falling out of my mouth, "I don't want a fresh start." I shot at him as I pulled my hand from his. "That island didn't turn out the way we had hoped but what we did wasn't a mistake. We did something that no one else could. You gave me a home and purpose. You gave me a family." Standing, I looked at all of them. "What happened was horrible. I will never be the same after what happened. I wish those who died were still alive. But I am not sorry for you giving me something to be passionate about. I'm not sorry that those were the happiest years of my life so far. So stop feeling sorry for yourselves."
Storming off, I went to my room, locking the door behind me. Taking a deep breath to steady my emotions, my hand moved to my side, touching the row of scars that arched around my side. My gift from the raptors. Phantom pain moved through them as I remembered that day. But the others were feeling sorry for themselves. We'd all lost something that day. None of us were untouched by the experience. But it seemed that they wanted to wallow in it. I didn't. I wouldn't.
Running through the jungle, I could hear them all around me. Pushing myself to run faster, the brush next to me shifted. She was coming. Hearing her cry out before launching herself at me. In the last second I was pushed aside, looking to see Robert standing in my place. The raptor landing on him, attacking him, blood spurting as she tore into his neck, muffled screams leaving him as he died.
Getting to my feet, I started to run again, though the same sound followed me. The rest of them weren't done with their chase. Ahead of me was the Visitor's Center. Knowing safety lay within it, I moved as fast as I could, breaking free from the foliage. Just as I was about to reach the steps, the ground shifted and from the corner of my eye I saw her. Sophie. There wasn't time to scream before she clasped her mouth around me, pain erupted around my middle before she snapped her jaws, breaking my spine, death shortly following.
Shooting up, sweat covered my body, my breathing coming in heaves. Looking around, it took me a moment to remember where I was. Sighing, I got up, walking the short distance to the bathroom. Splashing cold water on my face and neck, I looked at myself, hardly recognizing the reflection.
Making my way down the stairs, there was still a fire cracking in the fireplace, even though everyone else was in bed. Sitting in one of the oversized recliners, I stared at the fire, feeling exhausted. Sighing, I was deep in thought when a hand fell onto my shoulder making me jump, nearly falling from the chair.
"Ian." I said looking up at him.
"Sorry." I told me, sitting in the chair across from me. "Can't sleep?"
Scoffing, I shook my head, "Falling asleep isn't the problem. It's staying asleep that I can't seem to conquer."
"You want to go back despite the trauma you went through?" He asked. "Aren't the nightmares enough?"
Looking at him, I smiled fondly, despite thinking him wrong, "It's home."
"You're as terrified of that place as I am." He stated.
"Maybe I want to overcome my fear and maybe going back is the only way to do it." I replied.
"You're crazy." He smirked.
"I know." I smiled. "But it's still home and I still want to go back. I'm not afraid of the dinosaurs. I'm afraid that what happened will happen again."
"How are those different?" He asked.
Thinking a moment, I shook my head, "I don't know. But they are."
Sighing, he gently gripped my arm, pressing a kiss into my hair, "Get some sleep."
Watching him leave, I was one again along with my thoughts. When I felt like I might be able to fall asleep again, I climbed the stairs, passing my room and going into my father's. He was sleeping soundly. Lying down on my stomach, I sighed, watching him sleep. Maybe Ian was right. Maybe the nightmares were enough. I almost lost my father on that island. I almost lost Tim and Lex. I did lose Robert as well as Ray. Others were lost but none of them meant anything to me. Was it sad? Yes. But if I felt sorry for all those lost I truly would be a lost cause.
"Are you okay?" Alan asked, making me jump.
Smiling, I put my hand on his shoulder, "Yeah, sorry."
"Nightmare?"
"I've discovered that I don't have any when I'm with you."
He smiled, "Just like a five-year-old girl?"
"One that needs her daddy." I whispered back.
Opening his arm to me, I moved closer to him, letting him put his arm around me. "He's right here." He told me with a sigh.
"Never leave."
"Never."
Falling asleep, I woke to the sun beaming through the window, having slept amazingly the rest of the night. From the look of the sun I had also slept through the morning as well. Getting up, I showered and dressed before going downstairs. The house seemed quiet. I didn't like quiet. But then there was the sound of laughter. Following it, I found my father, Lex, and Tim in the dining room. There were wood pieces all over the table, the beginnings of a model between my father and Tim. Lex was sitting in a chair, smiling but it seemed a little forced.
"What are you guys up to?" I smiled, placing a kiss on top of Lex's head.
"Dr. Grant is helping me with my T-rex model." Tim grinned at me.
"He's kind of awesome like that." I said meeting my father's eyes.
Over the next several days, we all managed to work through some of our trauma. Ian left after just a few of them, needing to get back to something or someone he wasn't willing to tell us about yet. John watched over us as if he were the god of our little family. Seeing us work through what happened together, just as it should have been. But we knew it couldn't last forever. Alan got a call from Ellie, they sounded heated but when they were done he still held a smile on his face. It was time to go.
"I want you to stay." Tim said with his arms firmly wrapped around me.
"I know." I told him. "I'll be back."
"Promise?" Lex asked.
Smiling, I run my hand down her hair, "I promise." Stepping up to John, I hugged him gently, "Thank you for everything."
"Any time." He told me. "I mean that."
"And if you need anything, all you have to do is call." I smiled at him. Turning back to the kids, I gave them another hug, "Same goes for you two."
"We'll call you all the time." Tim told me.
"Good."
Alan said his quick goodbyes and we were back in the car. It was a quiet trip back to the states, nothing eventful happening. For some reason, I felt a wave of relief being back on US soil. Driving the few hours to the dig sight, it was early, making plenty of time to touch base with everything that had been happening since Alan's absence.
"Ellie." Alan said as she greeted us. She smiled but it seemed colder than usual. "How are you?"
"I'm good." She told him before she looked at me. "Hello, Linzie."
"Ellie." I smiled, though it was forced.
Going to the trailers, Alan led me to the one he had brought while we were gone. It was quant, but plenty of space for someone who would be working most of the time. Putting my bag in the bedroom off of the main space, I turned to my father, smiling at him.
"You need to forgive her." He told me. An argument we've had more than once.
"I know." I nodded. "But it's harder than it sounds. I've forgiven her over and over again in my head but every time I see her I – I just – can't."
"Robert's death is not her fault." He told me angrily.
"Well, I have to blame someone!" I yelled at him.
"Blame John Hammond!" He yelled back. "It was his park and his mistake that led to Robert's death!"
"And if it were not for that park than I never would have met Robert!" I countered. "Something I would never want taken from me." He just looked at me. Sighing, I lowered my voice, "Look, it doesn't matter."
"It does matter. Ellie and me are together. We are trying to make it work but I refuse to give you up."
"Why would you have to?" I shot at him.
"Because she can't handle your indifference."
"My indifference?" I frowned. "Is that really what she thinks I am toward her?" He just looked at me. "I'm not indifferent to her. It's just too painful to look at her."
"Then forgive her." He said and left.
Sitting at the table, I sighed heavily, waiting until I was cooled off before leaving the trailer. Alan was already getting to work, talking to his team, while Ellie sat at one of the picnic tables, looking upset. Sitting across from her, I didn't say anything right away, needing to just look at her for a moment.
"I'm sorry." I told her. "I don't hate you and I'm not indifferent toward you. You were the last person to see Robert alive. I've been holding that against you and I know that that isn't fair. It's not your fault. I've been blaming you because you are the one I'm the least close to. " Pausing, I took a deep breath. "But I'm sorry and I will do better. And I don't hate you, Ellie. I just don't know you and after what happened I haven't wanted to. But I love my father. I love him more than I ever thought I would. So I will get to know you and I'll love you too."
She just looked at me, deciding if I was telling the truth or not. After a long awkward moment, she reached her hand out, putting it over mine. "All right then."
Smiling, I nodded at her. Standing together we joined my father. Stepping up to the latest find, I looked down at the bones. This may not be what I intended on doing with my life, but just the sight of the bones made me want to be here even more. It was time to move passed what had happened and move forward. Even if by moving forward I was delving into the past. Only this past wouldn't hurt me. This past would allow me to continue my passion. I loved dinosaurs. I loved everything about them. Did I still want to return to the island? Yes. Someday I would make it back there. But today wasn't that day. Today I would cherish my time with my father. With Ellie. I'd be there for John and the kids. I'd live my life like my mother always wanted me to. Taking risks but knowing when to stop. For as extraordinary as my life had become, all that mattered was that I survived. I survived and had gained more than I had ever thought I would. But I knew that this wasn't the end for me. More was in store. And I'd be ready for when that time came.
THE END
A very short FanFiction for me. But still fun and I hope you enjoyed it! I plan on continuing and those will hopefully be a little longer.
