A/N: Thanks to all who read this story; it is for you that I do it.
Things are going to get juicy….
BPOV
"Wh-Where are we?" I opened my eyes slowly and took in my surroundings. My head throbbed and I felt unusually warm. Jasper and I were walking around last night, enjoying the beautiful scenery and a child threw a ball in my face. Deliberately. I blacked out, but not before I heard Jasper growl. I don't remember getting to the hotel or even going to bed. I hoped my head was okay; maybe Jasper will take me to the hospital. Yeah, just what I need. We're here for him and YOU get hurt. Typical Bella. I sat up and rubbed my eyes. They fell on the figure standing in front of the window.
"Reykjavik," the soft voice responded. I smiled. Jasper had yet to raise his voice to me. He was extremely patient with my klutziness. Although I didn't do anything to warrant that child hitting me, I still chalked it up to being my fault. He said I was crazy to think that. But this is me; I've always been self-conscious.
We had been in Iceland for a few days now and I was really beginning to like it. They had cool summers and mild winters. The people were nice (except for that child) and the buildings were old. The best part was that when we walked into a building, we saw modern-day technology. My jaw dropped the first time this happened.
I'll admit, I was a little skeptical at first. Iceland? Really? I thought. What does Iceland have that America doesn't have? Jasper's friends of course. They decided to buy a house and settle there. Since the climate is conducive to vampires, it was the perfect location. It made perfect sense.
Yet, I couldn't help but think that we were walking into the past. While on the flight I kept wondering if we would see horses pulling buggies and old crank-style telephones. The airport was modern and there were many vendors and restaurants. For a moment, I thought we were in New York. That's how busy it was. But when I saw "Welcome to Reykjavik," I was convinced.
Leave it to Jasper to find the American hotel. We were staying in the Hilton. Again, it surprised me to see so many modern-day luxuries. There was a spa, internet access, sauna, a bellhop, dry cleaning….The list goes on. And the room was perfect. It was spacious and furnished. The bed was a queen-size and smelled of clean sheets. There was a couch in the corner and the television was facing it. Many lamps were scattered around and it had wood floors. It was the perfect room; I loved it.
Jasper could tell. When we first arrived, I ran and jumped on the bed as soon as we entered. I hugged the oversized pillow to my chest and rolled around to feel the sheets on my skin. It was so comfortable and inviting. All I wanted to do was curl up in it. And I almost did until Jasper reminded me that I needed to eat. I grumbled and got out of the bed, stomping to the bathroom to freshen up. He laughed as he put the suitcases on the bed and picked the pillow up, breathing in my scent. He closed his eyes as it burned down his throat. His black eyes danced with desire.
We were still the same. There was a tension that wasn't going away, but neither of us did anything about it. I was scared to do anything, say anything. What if he leaves me? I know he said he wouldn't, but what if he DOES? What if he leaves me here in Iceland, with no way of getting back to the States? What would I do? I don't have any money on me; I've been relying on him completely. Oh God….
I really need to stop thinking like this.
Jazz has told me time and time again that he's not going anywhere. He says that I'm his life now that Alice is gone and he has to take care of me. And he has been so great these last four weeks, always making sure that I'm okay. My protector.
"What happened with that child, Jazz?" I asked as I stretched in the bed. My shirt rode up and exposed my belly button. I saw him looking at it intensely, not hearing me.
"Jazz?" I repeated. He snapped out of it.
"Huh?"
"What happened with the child who hit me?" I pulled my legs up against my chest and wrapped my arms around it so not to distract him anymore. He left his spot at the window and sat down beside me.
"I scared the shit out of him," he replied simply. I giggled. It sounded so strange to hear Jasper curse. Hell, it sounded strange to hear any of the Cullens cursing. Edward especially. I will always remember how "fuck" was the first word out of his mouth the first time we made love.
And now he's gone….
Jazz placed his cold hand on my arm, snapping me from my thoughts. I smiled sheepishly, feeling the blush. He raised an eyebrow.
"Why are you blushing?"
"I-I was thinking about Edward." Not a lie, but I couldn't very well tell him what I was thinking.
"Must have been some memory," he said with a laugh.
I nodded and yawned. He placed his hand to my forehead, cool touch immediately soothing me. "You feel warm, Bella, and I don't mean from your blush. I think you may be getting sick."
Great.
He slowly removed his hand and unbuttoned his shirt. His muscles stretched his tee shirt tight against him. After a moment, he pulled me into his arms. "I was wrong, you're burning up. I guess all that Arctic air wasn't good for you. I'm sorry."
He lay back on the bed with my head on his chest, his cool skin comforting me. He was right; I was feverish. Ever since we left Los Angeles, I have had one bout of illness or another. Usually it was just sleep deprivation, although how that could be I don't know. I slept a lot, but always felt tired.
Maybe it's the stress of running from Victoria.
I thought about that. Jazz said it was a possibility but not to worry about it. He said once we were settled, I'd get better. I asked him how long we were staying and never got a response. It was strange; like Jasper didn't want to tell me. Or didn't know. Or was keeping something from me.
I shook my head against his chest. I didn't want to think he was lying to me. He has been so wonderful. If not for him, I don't know where I'd be. Dead probably, and Victoria's quest would be complete.
As long as I live, she will continue to hunt me. How long before she finds us? How long does Jazz have until he's dead? Can I have him risk everything for me?
I wasn't sure. My thoughts were conflicting with each other. Sometimes I felt that it would be better for us to separate. That way, she'll come for me and leave him alone. Other times I worry that I won't make it on my own. Although he's not Edward, I have grown to rely on him during these three weeks. I feel that even though what I had with my deceased fiancé will be icing on the cake, I need to be able to settle. Jazz is comfort. He can make me happy.
Yet, I can't completely shake the feeling of dread. It has been here since we landed and will not go away. It's not major, but enough to make me bite my lip in worry. And when I do that, Jasper groans. He tells me that my lips are too beautiful to turn into hamburger.
He does that a lot. He is always telling me I'm beautiful or sexy. He goes on to say, a little disgustedly too, that Edward should never have left me and he hopes to have what he had. It's a nice compliment, but I can't help wonder what we will become after our troubles are behind us. Is he okay with being my companion? My friend? Am I? What about these sexual thoughts? Will they go away? Or intensify until I snap and jump him?
My libido really needs a break.
I was suddenly aware of the tension around us. A slight hum was present as he slowly ran his cool fingers down my arm, comforting me. Maybe it was the fever. I raised my head to look at him and his black eyes were locked on mine. He gave me a small smile and his movements didn't falter.
"This okay?"
"Yes," I said quietly. I didn't want the comfort to end. His talent of being able to feel human moods was such a precious gift. I wished he could try it out on someone other than me; I must be boring to him. My moods were basically sad and scared. Not much variance there.
Of course, I don't know what he heard when I slept. I'm guessing Edward's name. I've been dreaming about him a lot lately. In a recurring one, he's walking away from me and I'm trying to follow, but never reaching him. The distance lengthens as I call his name and get no answer. I am aware of the darkness surrounding me, but I don't care as I continue to run after him. I run and run until it becomes hopeless. Then I slump down and begin to weep.
So far, that's all I've seen. I've chocked it up as to losing him; that would explain my never being able to catch him. The darkness all around me is how I feel now without him in my life. I have not told Jazz this because I'm worried he'll think it's silly. So many other times he's been comforting, but I notice an annoyance when Edward's name is brought up. His black eyes darken and his posture becomes rigid. Like he doesn't want to be reminded of him.
It's probably because he's hurting too. That was his brother that he lost, along with the rest of his family. And of course, Alice.
But the strange thing is, whenever I bring her up, he changes the subject. He says that it's too painful to think about her and would rather focus on me. I understand the pain; believe me I do, but is forgetting it right? Is the way to get over the pain to forget? Instead of moving on?
I snuggled closer into his chest. I craved contact. I was desperate for a man's touch. I shouldn't be thinking of him this way, but I couldn't help it. I knew he was attractive, but he had never held so much desire in me as he did now. I wanted him. All of him. And I hated myself for it.
And I can't stop looking at him. I've seen him without his shirt twice. Nice, firm abs, toned arms and low-slung pants that only enhance my imagination.
I closed my eyes. I have to stop thinking this way. It's Jasper. Alice's Jasper. She would kill me if she knew I was having sexual thoughts about her husband. Not to mention it would destroy Edward, if he was still alive.
But he's not. And neither is she.
I hate that voice. That is the voice of the old Bella; the one that would fuck anything in her path. The one that used men, the one who was raped because of it. The old Bella died that night in the alley and the new one was here now, lying in bed with another man, everything completely innocent. The old Bella wouldn't have wasted time; she would have jumped Jasper the first day. The new Bella loves Edward, but since he's dead, she's confused as to what she wants.
Jasper's grip on me tightened. Within a flash I was lying with my head on the pillow and him hovering over me. He felt my forehead again; it was feverish. He sighed and got up.
"Where are you going?" I asked frantically.
He stopped and looked at me. My voice had shocked him. "Down to the front desk to see if I can get some medicine."
I nodded. He was standing by the bed and leaned down to kiss my forehead, the temperature of his lips immediately soothing me.
"Will they be able to help? I mean, we're in a foreign country."
He laughed as he reached the door. "Bella, I'm sure they have a thermometer and Tylenol. I'll be right back." And with that, he was gone.
Like clockwork, his phone started ringing. I lifted my head off the pillow and glared at it, willing it to stop. After a minute, it did. I laid my head back down.
It rang again.
I groaned as I got up from the bed to answer it. He had placed it at the window he was standing at earlier, no doubt on the phone with Charlotte while I was sleeping.
What I saw next made me drop the phone. I saw Alice's number on it. Alice? What the hell? She's dead! It didn't dawn on me that the number could have been reassigned once Jasper called the cell phone company to cancel it. Course, I never actually heard him do it, unless it was one of the many times I was asleep. But wouldn't he have to sign a form or something? When would he have done it? He's always with me. The number wasn't programmed in his phone, but I've seen it so many times I know it by heart.
I reached down quickly to answer it but it had stopped ringing. I hit 'redial' to see whose voice I got on the other line.
"Yes?" an unfamiliar voice said.
"Uh, Alice?"
The line was silent. Definitely not Alice. I couldn't hear breathing, couldn't hear anything but a clicking sound. I was about to hang up when the voice said "I'm sorry, you have a wrong number."
Something about that voice is beginning to sound familiar….
I blushed at my mistake; of course the number was reassigned. "I'm sorry. This used to be my sister-in-law's number, but she's dead. I wasn't aware that they had reassigned it so fast."
Again, there was silence on the other end. Could be the connection. "I'm sorry to hear about your sister-in-law. This is Rebecca and yes, the number has been reassigned."
I nodded as though she could see me. "I'm sorry for the trouble."
"Oh, believe me, it's no trouble." With that the line went dead.
I stared at the phone in disbelief, wondering what the hell happened. The feeling of dread returned and I slowly retreated back to the bed. I sat down on it and pulled the drawer of the nightstand open. Taking out a pen and paper, I wrote the number down so I could ask him about it at a later date.
Could he have someone else?
The thought of that unsettled me as I returned the contents to the drawer and propped up against the pillow. It's too soon for Jasper to have someone. He can't mourn Alice properly.
Hypocrite. You keep having fantasies about him, what does that say about you?
I sighed loudly and heard the door open.
"Was I gone that long?" he asked as he returned carrying some supplies.
I laughed. "No. Sorry, I was just thinking." He placed everything on the table near the window and came over to me, holding out medicine and water.
"Take these, it'll help the fever."
"Yes Dr. Cullen," I said and immediately felt guilty. I raised my eyes to his, expecting to see pain but instead saw annoyance. Why would he be annoyed that I'm bringing his family up?
He turned away from me and placed the bottle on the table. I yawned loudly.
"You should get some sleep, Bella. That's how you'll get better." His back was to me.
Odd.
"Will you lie with me until I fall asleep?"
He turned to me slowly and stared into my eyes. I couldn't read the emotion in his black eyes. I thought I saw worry, concern and lust, but maybe the lighting was bad.
He was very cautious, very hesitant, as though he was thinking things through. He lay down next to me and I snuggled up against his chest, breathing in his Earthy scent. After a moment, he put an arm around me.
I sighed against his chest and he hummed a tune quietly, comforting me. I felt my eyelids growing heavy.
He shifted so he was hovering over me, his weight on one arm. I knew that wasn't painful at all for him, being the vampire that he is. I slowly brought my hand up, careful to not make any sudden moves, and ran it down his arm, feeling his skin warm at my touch. His eyes, consistently black these days, closed and he moaned softly.
"That feels amazing," he whispered. I continued the movement. He opened his eyes. The blackness was still there, of course, but something else as well. They were full of depth, passion. Desire. There was no doubting it now. I could only stare into the black void. I was lost, mesmerized by the passion I saw there, the beauty. I could not look away. Nor did I want to.
Then, very gently, he lowered his lips to mine.
A/N: So, who was on the phone?
Thanks for reading. Please, please review. Let's get to 65!
