CONTENT WARNING: DISCUSSION OF SELF-INJURY (CUTTING)- USE CAUTION IF THIS WILL TRIGGER YOU.

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Sam looked down at Aly laying in the bed next to him. She had been deeply asleep for a few hours now, and he could smell dinner-smells wafting down the hallway. His stomach rumbled with hunger- he hadn't gotten to finish his lunch, and he had stayed with Aly while she was talking and crying.

Aly stirred in the bed next to him and then opened her eyes. She looked up at him, blinking slowly, and then sat up, registering that she was now wearing jeans and had white bandages along the insides of her forearms. She glanced at Sam again, looking guilty, and then burst into tears.

"Hey, hey," Sam said gently, putting his laptop on the ground next to the bed. He turned to her and pulled her into his arms again.

She grabbed ahold of him tightly and gripped the back of his shirt, pressing her face into his chest and sobbing. "I'm sorry, Sam," she said, "I'm s-sorry I r-ran away and I c-cut mys-self." She lowered her head as if she was ashamed.

"I understand why you ran, things were getting pretty intense in here," Sam told her, "But why the cutting?"

She sobbed for a couple more minutes and then began to try and get her breathing under control. "I—I j-just feel, that I can't—can't han-handle this any m-more," she said haltingly, "E-every time I -t-try to t-talk about things, we all end up in- in a big argument."

"I know," Sam said, "All of us have a lot that needs to be talked out."

"Well it's t-too mu-much," she sobbed, "It makes me f-feel like it's all m-my f-fault."

"It's not, though, you know that, right?"

She shook her head. "I r-ran away and did all th-those bad th-things and now I r-ran away again," she said, "I j-just felt like there was s-so mu-much pain, I w-wanted to g-get it out."

"So that's why you cut yourself? To help the pain get out?" Sam asked.

Aly nodded, her head pressed against his chest.

"Well, you don't have to do that anymore, okay? We'll figure out some better ways to help you deal with the pain," he told her.

"S-sam, w-will you talk to ev-everyone? And tell them wh-what I sh-showed you?"

He looked down at her. "You remember?"

She nodded again. "Kinda. I started to remember wh-when I was talking to you and sending you wh-what happened."

"But you don't remember before that?"

"Just r-running into the corn field and falling over a b-big log. I hurt my knees and started to c-cry and then I looked around and f-found a p-piece of glass and I...I cut myself. Then I don't remember anything after that. I was crying hard."

"You age regressed to about 4 years old, ran through the corn to the farm next-door, and they brought you into their house and gave you cookies. They called Calvin and he and Dad went to get you. You ripped your pants up, when you fell, I guess. When you guys came back, I told you I'd fix up your knees and you just took your pants off right there in the kitchen, and sat down."

"Oh," she said.

"Dean didn't know how to handle you, and he was concerned that you'd be embarrassed," Sam told her with a chuckle. She shrugged.

"I bandaged your knees and Dad noticed the scrapes on your arms and asked you about it...you wouldn't let him see at first and he had to threaten you with a spanking, then I bandaged them too. We ate lunch and Dad said you had to take a nap after, and you asked if I'd lay with you. It's funny how quickly the old routine of getting you to bed came back to me," Sam chuckled again, "Then you started to tell me what happened, and then show me, and then you cried for a long time, and then you started talking again and it was you."

Sam looked down at her. "You know, I felt it- when they first revealed themselves to you, all the anguish and desparation and terror that you were feeling- and I almost fainted. Dean thought I was having a stroke. And then you started sending me images, right? I kept seeing that one kid, Glenn? And I was able to find a police sketch artist and have them draw him, and then we found him in the DMV database and that's how we were able to pinpoint where you were."

"It is?" Aly asked.

"Yeah...so your powers helped us find you...and you helped save yourself too."

Aly tightened her arms around Sam and he hugged her back. They sat that way for a while, and then someone knocked on the doorjamb. They turned towards the door and saw Dean standing there.

"Uh, Aly?" Dean said uncertainly.

"I'm here, Dean," Aly said, "I'm not going to be taking my clothes off again any time soon."

Dean relaxed and smiled. "Good. Dinner's just about on the table. How are you feeling?"

"Like I'm...numb," Aly told him, "Empty. Drained. Tired."

"Well, you cried for a long time before," Sam said, "That's probably why you feel like that."

"You gonne be okay?" Dean asked gently.

Aly shrugged. "I need to go to the bathroom, I'll meet you guys in the kitchen," she said. After she left the room, Sam stood up and Dean walked over to him.

"How is she really, man?" Dean asked Sam quietly.

"She showed me what happened, I mean the things they were doing to her before we got there. She doesn't want to talk about it any more, says it's too much. She feels like everything is her fault and then when we end up arguing it makes her feel worse," Sam told him.

Dean glanced at the doorway. "Well, there's a lot of history we've got to get through," he said with a grimace.

"I know, but to keep bringing things up from the past and arguing about it isn't good for her right now. She asked me to tell everyone about what happened to her. She doesn't want to," Sam said.

"Maybe that's for the best," Dean said.

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I came into the kitchen right behind my brothers. Dad was standing by the table facing the counter and Uncle Bobby and Calvin were over at the stove. Everyone turned to look at me when I came in.

"It's me," I said, "I'm...back, I guess? Hi Daddy," I felt a moment of surprise that it felt natural to say that to him, even though I hadn't called him that in at least a couple of years.

Dad put the napkins he was holding on the table and spoke to me. "Alyson Elisabeth, you run again, and my belt comes off," he said, and his voice was almost the deep growl that he got when he was really angry. My mouth went dry.

Calvin turned from the stove. "John, didn't we talk-"

Dad held up his hand. "Calvin, I know what we talked about, but dammit, I feel like if I don't lay down the law with her it's just going to happen again. And it better not," Dad gave me the Winchester Glare. "The cutting, I'll be honest, I don't understand it, but we can talk about and deal with it. But there will be NO-MORE-RUNNING-- is that clear?"

I gulped. "Y-yes s-sir," I said shakily.

"In fact, I'm wondering if I shouldn't just whip your butt for everything you did before, and that will serve as a reminder not to do it again," Dad put his hands on his hips.

Sam took a step towards the table. "Geez Dad, way to call Aly out in front of everyone," he said angrily, "Don't you think it would have been better to talk about this with her in private, instead of right her, in front of everyone? She's not a little kid-"

Dad interrupted him. "Sam, I don't need you telling me how to parent-"

"I'm NOT, I just think-"

"STOP IT!" I yelled over both of their voices. Sam turned to look at me. "We're not talking about any of it any more. I showed Sam what—what happened to me, and he can tell you. I don't—I don't want to talk about it, I don't want to keep sitting down and bringing up stuff from the past. I can't—I can't do it any more. Can we please just- I don't know, try to be, like, regular people for a while? I mean, I know we're not, but, can we stop re-hashing everything? It's not- it feels like it's not helping."

Everyone looked at each other.

"Well, I'll admit, I didn't think about it that way, but maybe we should give it a try," Calvin said. "But you tell us if you need to talk, about anything, hear?" he looked at me.

"I will," I agreed.

Dad came over to me and stood looking down at me. His eyes were sad. "Aly, I don't mean to be harsh," he said hoarsely, "but I don't want to lose you again. I can't lose you again. We'll work all of this out, but you need to stay here and not run any more." He pulled me into a hug for a long moment.

"Okay, Daddy," I whispered, "I'm sorry I ran again. You- you should punish me for it."

He pulled back and looked me in the eyes. "No, sweetheart, not now. We'll deal with all that later." He led me over to the table and I sat down.

Uncle Bobby and Dad started to bring dishes of food over to the table. The rest of them sat down.

"Dean, we should be getting a couple pies from my neighbor in a day or so," Calvin told him, "His wife does a lot of baking and I asked her to send some over."

"Sounds great," Dean said.

"Well, Aly, do you want to try to pick up home-schooling again?" Sam looked at me.

"Sure," I agreed, "It'll give me something to do, and I promise I'll do my best." I smiled at him.

"I've got everything in the trunk still packed away," Sam said, "I'll get it out later tonight."

After we ate, I helped Dean clear the table and load the dish washer.

Sam came into the kitchen. "I got all your school books out if you want to take a look," he told me, "In the library."

I followed him into the library and we sat down at the desk I had sat at months ago when we'd been here before. I felt a pang of nervousness and sorrow, remembering all the stress and upset we had gone through with the home-schooling.

Sam was flipping through one of the textbooks. "I think we had left off in this unit-" he was saying, and then he looked at me. "What's wrong, Aly?" he asked with concern.

I felt my eyes fill with tears and I looked at him. "Sam, I'm sorry about before. I wasn't- I didn't—I screwed up, I know, and I-"

"Hey, shh, stop it." he said gently, "We already talked about it, and you've already apologized. Let it go, okay? I'm not upset about it any more." He smiled at me and put his hand on mine. "Okay?"

I nodded and took a deep breath. "Okay, Sam." I agreed. I listened to him as he talked to me and went through all of the books, figuring out where we had left off before.

"Sam," I said hesitantly, "I'm going to need- extra help with the algebra, I really didn't understand it-"

He looked guilty. "I know, Aly. I didn't- I wasn't listening to you before, I had my own agenda. We'll work on it together this time, and I won't get mad at you." he smiled at me again.

He picked up a paperback. "Did you ever finish reading Emma?" he asked.

"Uhh, I can't even remember," I said, "Maybe I should watch it again to refresh my memory." I teased.

"Well, all right," Sam said, "Dean, you up for a costume drama tonight?"

"If it's got lotsa low cut dresses and cleavage, I'm in!" Dean smirked.

After we finished watching the movie, I got ready for bed and then went to my room. I had just sat down on my bed when there was a knock on the door.

Dad came into the room and approached the bed slowly. "Is it- is it okay if I, you know, tuck you in?" he asked, almost shyly.

"Uh, sure," I said, feeling a little uncomfortable. I got under the covers and he came over and sat down on the edge of the bed. He took one of my arms and straightened it, turning it and looking at the scrapes. Sam had removed the bandages and then cleaned the wounds, and rubbed some antibiotic ointment in.

I started to pull away, feeling a nervous pang, and afraid that he was going to start scolding me again. After a moment, he let my arm go, and then looked at me.

"Aly, can I ask you something?" he said quietly.

"Sure," I said slowly.

"Can you, uh, explain...this...to me?" he gestured to my arms, "Because like I said, I don't understand it, and I want to understand it, and you. I want to know why you did it and try to make it so that you don't do it again, I don't want you to hurt yourself."

I took a deep breath and stared down at the blanket. "I just felt...like there was too much pain." I sighed, even though I didn't feel much of anything at the moment. "Every time we start talking, everyone gets so angry, and it's upsetting, and there's so much already in here," I put my hand on my chest. "It just gets to feeling overwhelming, and I felt like...it seemed like the only way I could get it out was by doing something like that- like cutting."

"Have you, uh, have you done that before?"

I shook my head. "No. There was a girl in chorus who did and sometimes she'd talk about it after rehearsals."

"Is that where you got the idea from?"

"No, Dad, I wasn't copying her!"

"I'm not saying that. I just wondered, because it's not something I'd ever think that you would do. You've always been cautious around weapons."

"Well, I didn't use a weapon, I used a broken piece of glass."

He grimaced. "I know. Just...please, if you start to feel that way again, like it's too much, don't...don't do that, don't hurt yourself again. Talk to someone, let someone know. And find something else to do, rip up a piece of paper or scream into a pillow or something, you know? Will you promise me that?"

"Okay, Dad," I agreed.

He pulled me into a tight hug. "I don't want to lose you, sweetheart, to anything, and I don't like knowing that you hurt yourself."

"I'm sor-"

"I'm not saying it so that you'll apologize. I just want you to know that. Okay?"

"Okay." I repeated.

"I'm trying to change, Aly, to make things better. I know I can't change the past, but I can make changes now and that will change the future." He squeezed me and let me go, and looked me in the eyes. "I'm so glad that you're here with us and that you're safe," he told me, and it looked like tears came to his eyes for a couple seconds.

There was a knock on the doorjamb, and my brothers came into the room.

"We wanted to say goodnight," Dean said as they walked over to the bed.

All of a sudden there was a loud rushing sound, the sound of wings flapping, and then the angel was standing there in front of us.

"Winchesters, I must speak with you," Castiel said, "I have been trying to discover why I was not able to completely remove Alyson's powers."

"And-?" Dean asked.

"In the bloodline of your family there was an ancestor who had powers, which have subsequently been diluted with each passing generation."

"Why haven't I ever heard of this?" Dad asked, standing up.

Castiel looked at him. "It is in your wife's lineage," he said, "It was so long ago that they may not even have known. I had to search for a long time, to discover what the truth was."

"So, what is the truth?" Dean asked impatiently, "Lay it on us."

"Long ago, there was a warlock who had somehow mananged to capture an angel. The how of it is not clear. A wise woman- healer fought the warlock, and managed to free the angel, but in the process, she was gravely injured. The angel gave her some blood to restore her, and it gave her powers. She became a powerful witch."

"Aw, man, we're related to witches? I freakin' hate witches!" Dean said.

"Shh," Sam bumped Dean's elbow with his.

Castiel continued like Dean and Sam hadn't even spoken, "The child that she bore after that became a powerful wise woman of her village. Each subsequent generation after that had less and less power."

"There should be records of this somewhere, right?" Sam asked, "The relatives, I mean, if this is the Campbell line, it's got to be Scotland, right?"

"That is correct, Sam," Castiel said.

"Why was this so hard for you to find?" Dad asked him.

"Because the archangels do not like to admit that there have been times when angels have been helped by humans. They want to be seen as infallible. The records were...somewhat hidden."

"So what does that mean for Aly?" Dean asked, "What does this little history lesson have to do with her? Or any of us, for that matter."

"Are you aware of what Azazel was trying to do?" Castiel asked, "Alyson's soul is very powerful, because it is so pure. She is from a long line of hunters but because she is not a hunter, her soul was never exposed to the evil and pain that hunters become exposed to. He was trying to harness her powers to use her as a 'battery', to power the ritual that was to bring Lucifer onto the earth, and into Sam's body.

Once Alyson's powers were used, her spirit would have been obliterated. He recognized the power she had in her soul, and had a team of witches performing a spell to bring her abilities to fruition and also strengthen them. This spell had the affect of waking the dormant ancestral powers in her blood, and Sam's as well. That is why her abilities cannot be removed, but are instead very weak. That is why both Alyson and Sam can still communicate telepathically."

"So, now what?" Sam asked. "Do we train Aly to control her powers? Is she going to have to stay hidden for the rest of her life?"

"No," Castiel said. "We are still blocking her powers. We are still trying to discover if there are ways to remove them completely. I will be serving as Alyson's guardian angel."

"Oh great, we get the angel in the trench coat," Dean said sarcastically.

Now Dad knocked Dean's elbow. "Be respectful, Dean," he scolded.

"How will you guard me?" I asked. "Does that mean I can go outside now? Can I go places?"

"You would do well to learn some self defense and warding against demons before you go anywhere."

Castiel produced a scroll of parchment and handed it to Dad. "These should be memorized by all of you- a prayer of protection and a warding to detect if there is evil present."

"Thank you," Dad said to him.

Castiel looked at us. "I will return when I have news," and then in the blink of an eye he was gone.

Dad unrolled the scroll. The prayers were written in such ornate calligraphy that it was hard to read the words. He showed it to Sam. "Think you can figure this out?" he asked.

Sam glanced over it. "I think so," he said. "I want to see if I can find these Campbell ancestors that he mentioned too, there should be records somewhere. A lot of genealogy information is online these days."

Dad looked down at me. "Are you all right, Aly?" he asked.

"Yeah," I nodded, "It- it's kindof nice to know that I have a guardian angel."

Dean scoffed. "Yeah, we'll see," he said skeptically.

"Come on, dude, he's an angel, the way he looks has nothing to do with what kind of powers he has," Sam told him.

"And if we were to ever look at him in his true form, we'd probably end up dead or something," Dad said, "Angels have to use a vessel to interact with humans, so that their angelic glory doesn't get revealed."

" 'Angelic Glory'?" Dean's voice was sarcastic.

"There are stories of people's eyes being burned out, or losing their sanity, because an angel showed them their true self. It's not something to joke about, Dean," Dad said seriously. He looked down at me. "We'll get this prayer translated and written out so that we can all start memorizing it, and I have some other things I want you to memorize as well."

"Okay, Dad," I said. He leaned down to hug me, and kissed the top of my head. Sam and Dean stepped over to the bed and did the same, and then they left the room after Dad turned on the night light.

I laid in bed and thought about what Castiel had said. If the angels couldn't figure out how to remove my powers, would I have them forever? Did that mean that there would always be demons after me, trying to kidnap me to use those powers?

Maybe I should become a hunter like my family, so that I could defend myself, and maybe I could learn to use my powers to defeat demons. I didn't want to hide away at Calvin's for the rest of my life. Meg was still out there, and I didn't know if she was looking for me. The thought of seeing her again made me feel nervous, so I tried to stop thinking about her as I fell asleep.