Harry was awoken the following morning by the sound of an owl pecking at his dorm-room window. Suddenly alert, he bolted out of bed to answer the owl before it woke any of his roommates. It was Draco. It had to be.
As the Eagle owl flew through the open window, Harry realized that he had never actually met Lennon before.
"Hello there," he said a little cautiously. Lennon let out a business-like screech, stuck out his head, and looked at Harry expectantly. "Well then," he said with a laugh. "You know what you're doing then." He unattached the note tied to the owl's leg. Lennon did not fly away, obviously having been instructed to wait for a reply. Slightly nervous, Harry unrolled the letter.
Harry,
I'm not sure if you have plans, and I don't want to bother you, but to be completely honest I don't think I'll do too well on my own today. Is there any way we could meet? Just for a little, if that's what you want… I'm sorry.
Draco
Harry frowned, rather surprised by the tone of the note and at the nervous tingling that had settled firmly in the pit of his stomach. He was worried. Quickly, he flipped the paper over and scrawled a response.
Draco,
Please meet me outside the Great Hall in 30 minutes. Don't apologize. I offered to help you and we're friends now, remember? We'll get some breakfast and after that we'll talk about what we're going to do with today. Just hang in there, and I'll see you soon.
Harry
Ron began to stir in the bed beside his.
"What's going on?" He mumbled, sleepily.
"I might tell you later," Harry answered. "Right now it's really up to me." This seemed to intrigue Ron, as he sat up in bed, looking considerably more alert, and narrowed his eyes on the note that Harry was now re-tying to the owl.
"Is that Malfoy's owl?" Harry sighed.
"Yes, Ron."
"What's the wanker doing to writing to you?" Harry felt a headache coming on. He was going to have to give Ron some level of explanation, or risk Ron misunderstanding and making an attack on Draco.
"He's not how you think, Ron. Trust me. He and I are getting to know each other. Hopefully, you'll be able to soon." Harry crossed his fingers, hoping this would be enough for his friend.
"What the bloody hell is that supposed to mean?" Ron was completely awake. Harry shushed him.
"Okay, okay. I can't tell you everything. He'll kill me. Leave it at this. Draco is a very, very different person than you think he is. He is having a very hard time right now, I found out by chance, and the two of us are getting to know each other. I am trying to help him through some problems right now, and I really need your cooperation." The redhead seemed to be weighing whether or not he should be leave this. He seemed to decide on yes.
"Is he okay?" He finally asked.
"No." Answered Harry firmly. "No, he isn't. Look, I'm going to try to get him to join us for breakfast this morning. I need you to stay as positive as possible. I'm going to talk to Hermione before I head out." Harry dressed quickly, knowing that if he was only a minute late, there was a chance that Draco would assume he wasn't coming at all.
"How did you find out?" Asked Ron, as he was about to leave.
"I can't tell you that." Harry told him, "I'm sure he wouldn't want anyone to know. When he trusts you, you'll know." Ron seemed unhappy about this, but understanding still. Harry gave a nervous glance in Seamus' direction. "Do me a favor. When you and Hermione go down to breakfast, try to sit away from Seamus and them, yeah? I don't think he's likely to take everything very well. He'll need some time." Ron nodded.
"Yeah, alright mate." Harry went downstairs and pointed his wand at the intercom system at the bottom of the girls' rooms' entryway.
"Hermione Granger." He said clearly. He waited for a moment, and the intercom replied.
"Yes?" Answered Hermione's voice.
"Hey, Hermione, it's me. Can you come downstairs? I need to talk to you about something."
"Yeah," She answered, sounding concerned. "Is everything okay?" Harry didn't know how to answer this, so he didn't. "Just come down."
About five minutes later, Hermione came bounding down the stairway.
"What's up?" Harry sat her down.
"I'm going to have to do this quickly because I need to leave. Look, Draco Malfoy is not the person that you think he is."
"Why the sudden change in opinion Harry, did something happen?"
"Sort of. I'm helping him through some problems and we've been getting to know each other."
"Well that's great," answered Hermione. Harry looked at her grimly.
"Only if it works." Hermione answered his grim expression. "Anyway, I'm probably bringing him to breakfast today. Just be prepared, and be gentle. I've already talked to Ron." He remembered how Hermione had slapped him their third year. "Seriously, Hermione. You need to be nice." Hermione nodded.
"A-alright… Harry what is going on?"
"I don't have time to explain right now. I'm sorry. I've got to meet him in ten minutes. I'll see you later."
Without waiting for a response, Harry turned around and climbed through the portrait hole. He knew it wasn't fair to do this to his friends with such little explanation, but at the same time it would be even more unfair to Draco to share his secrets without his permission. Ultimately, Ron and Hermione would be allowed into the loop – he was sure of it. Until then, they were just going to have to stay confused.
He made the trip to Great Hall in a stupid looking fast walk, and was rather surprised to discover that Draco was already there, waiting. It had only been 20 minutes since sending his note. The blonde looked as though he hadn't slept well, and an overall upset looking demeanor, and took on a relieved expression at the sight of Harry approaching.
"You came," said the boy stupidly as he reached him.
"Well, yeah," said Harry. "I'm the one that set the meeting up…" Draco blushed, slightly. He stared at the floor. Harry could see that his eyes were still slightly puffy from the day before. Or, he at least hoped they were. The thought that Draco could have been crying before coming down made him feel sad. "Have a rough night?" He asked, gently. Draco kept his eyes on the floor and didn't answer. People were beginning to file past them and into the Great Hall." Harry touched his shoulder.
"Come on," he said. "Let's go in here for a moment." He led Draco into an empty classroom. Draco still said nothing. They both sat, and Harry waited, patiently. "Is everything okay?" He asked, after a few minutes of Draco intently staring at his feet. When he answered, he didn't look up.
"I threw up last night." He said, quietly. Harry frowned.
"Was it on purpose?" He asked cautiously, remembering one of the lines from Draco's suicide note. Draco shook his head.
"No." He whispered. "Just upset."
"Has that happened before?" Harry asked, worriedly. Draco shook his head again. Harry had been right. Draco had had a rough night. "I wish you'd written me."
"I did." Answered Draco. "This morning."
"You could have written last night." Draco didn't respond. "Can I see them, Draco?" Said Harry, after a moment. For a moment, the blonde acted as though he hadn't heard. Then, slowly, he lifted his arm up and held out for Harry to see. Finally, his grey eyes lifted to meet his.
Gently, Harry rolled up the sleeve of Draco's sweater. He gasped slightly at the sight. The cuts he saw now were worse than any of the ones he had seen before. They were angry, violent, disorganized, and deep. And there weren't – as Harry was saddened to discover – few. There were close to 2 dozen fresh slashes. He looked up to meet Draco's eyes.
"What happened, Draco?" Draco pulled has arm back, shook down his sleeve and wrapped his arms around himself.
"I don't know." Harry could tell he was being truthful. "I think I had another anxiety attack. I couldn't think. I was just scared." Harry put a comforting hand on Draco's arm. "You can still tell, Harry," he continued, raising his volume. "You can still tell I was crying yesterday. You're the only one who's ever even cared!" He got quiet for a moment. "I'm invisible." He said softly. "I just don't matter."
"That's not true, Draco." Said Harry firmly.
"I don't really want them to know," he mumbled. "They'd laugh at me."
"No, they wouldn't, Draco, I'd make sure of that."
"It's none of their business," he said, louder again. "I wouldn't tell them if they asked. It's just…" He stopped. "You can still tell, Harry." His voice was shaking. "I should be a disgrace to the Malfoy name. At the very least, they should be ostracizing me. But… no one even notices. I'm not even pretending anymore." He finished with a whisper.
"I noticed," said Harry. "I'm here. You're not alone." Draco wrapped his arms tighter around himself. Harry could see that he had really meant it when he'd expressed nervousness about being alone. He looked like he was barely holding himself together. "It's going to be alright. You're going to be okay." Draco didn't answer. "Are you hungry?" The blonde shook his head.
"I'll probably just throw up again." Harry frowned.
"You should at least try." He sighed. Maybe it wasn't a good idea having him join his friends this morning. "Look," said Harry very slowly. "If it's alright with you, I would like for you to join my friends and I at breakfast this morning. People have already seen us together anyway, and it might be good for you to be part of a decent group for a change." Draco looked unsure.
"I don't know, Harry." He tucked his head between his knees and ran his fingers though his hair. "If they're mean to me I'd probably lose it right now." He mumbled to his pants.
"They won't be," Harry told him. "I spoke with them this morning." Draco's head snapped up, suspicious.
"What did you tell them?" He demanded.
"Nothing revealing." Said Harry calmly. "Just that I'm getting to know you, you're not who you think, and that I'm helping you out with some stuff. They don't know anything else. The only reason I said anything at all was so they wouldn't be confused if you joined us today. I think they'd like to know you, too."
"They don't deserve to know anything." Draco snapped. "You're the only one that cared." Harry sighed.
"I didn't mean about your cuts, Draco. Or the suicide note, or anything about your problems. Just you. The boy I met in the café. Nothing personal like that. That's only if you're comfortable. No one needs to know a thing but me." Draco was silent for a while.
"I have a hard time eating with people watching me." He finally whispered. This concerned Harry even deeper.
"I thought you wrote on your note that it was only occasional." Draco sighed, hiding his head again. He mumbled something Harry couldn't hear. "What was that?"
"The vomiting." He repeated, without lifting his head. "The vomiting is. I don't know." Harry moved closer to Draco, sitting beside him so that they were touching.
"How often do you eat, Draco?"
"Enough." Somehow Harry doubted this. "No one ever looks at me anyways." Draco continued. "So it's not a problem."
"You don't sit with the Slytherins?" Draco sat up.
"Well, yeah. I used to. The conversations were stupid though, so I gave up." Harry didn't know how to respond. His mind was racing now. There was a decent chance that – on top of everything else – Draco was suffering from at least a mild eating disorder.
"I understand if you're uncomfortable." He finally said.
"I'll come." Answered Draco, following some silence. "But I'm really trusting you on this. I don't know if you really understand what will happen if they attack me. I'm barely holding on as it is." Harry's stomach dropped from the sheer un-apologetic honesty he was getting from his former foe.
"I know." He answered, seriously. "If at any point you feel like we need to leave, please just let me know." Draco nodded. They stood, and headed toward the door, and Harry stopped him. "Hold on a moment."
Unsure of exactly what he was doing, Harry pulled him into hug.
"It's going to be okay." He told him. Draco froze for a moment, but then wrapped his arms around Harry in return.
"I hope so," he whispered. And when Harry pulled away, there was single, stray tear making its way down Draco's pale, saddened cheek.
