Darcy called upon Huntsford, hoping to find Miss Elizabeth alone. She was not, Mrs. Collins was with her and answered the door. Darcy nodded his greeting and pressed the letter into her hands. He had not the courage to face her and hoped that she would read it.

"Please, Mrs Collins, if you can, persuade Miss Elizabeth to read this," with that, Darcy left the letter in her hands.

Dear Miss Elizabeth,

I hope this letter finds you in good health. I must first seek your pardon for my behaviour, which must have been so disgusting, towards you last night. I must explain that my betrothal to Anne de Bourgh is an informal one conceived by our parents at birth. Only Lady Catherine would hold me to that. However, I have no intention of fulfilling the promises my mother made to her, but not because it would not be an advantageous match. I have need to explain myself fully, and if, in the explanation of myself and my actions, I may be offensive to you, I cannot apologize. I had not been long independent of my father when Lady Catherine first solicited my hand, but, as she is now, Anne was frail and weak. An ordeal of marriage would all but kill her, and despite what you may think of me, I would not wish the death of a dear cousin for the mere increment of my income and title. Anne stands to inherit all of Rosings for herself, and she and I both understand that we would not find happiness together. Lady Catherine's wishes are but wishes, she holds no legal grounds and cannot force the two of us into matrimony.

I have long been convinced of Charles' affections for your elder sister, and though I have observed that she may not return them with the same passion, I understand that it is not my place to comment. On happening upon her in London, I have since changed my mind, and wrote to Charles immediately. He has informed me of their engagement as you will also have knowledge of from Miss Bennet's letters. Being similarly trifled as Charles, I could not but empathize.

You must know that it was not my decision to leave Hertfordshire. You must have registered the shock on my face the day Charles announced our departure. Upon arriving at Netherfield, all my belongings were gone, and as I was at Charles's disposal, his hasty departure left me with little choice. I had two options. One was to return to London with Charles and hope, in vain, that I could forget of my most ardent love for you. The second was to remain at Netherfield, angering Charles, and announcing our courtship to the entire neighbourhood, which if it had ended unsuccessfully would have ruined my happiness, perhaps forever, and your reputation. I had no knowledge of your sentiments towards me, and I still have not. Believe me, I am sorry to have caused you so much pain. Any pain felt on your part is tenfold to me.

You may wonder why, with so little design of relating this to you yesterday, I choose to write this letter to you. I was not myself and had embarrassed the both of us, myself for my horrendous behaviour and you for having to suffer it. It is my intention to reacquaint myself with you, if you will allow it. I will only add, that, I wish every happiness upon you, whether you find it with me or with another worthy gentleman.

FITZWILLIAM DARCY

Darcy had not gone far, however, and stayed by their porch. He knew it was perfectly ungentlemanly, but had to eavesdrop on their conversation if only to hear her voice one last time.

"Lizzie, its a letter from Mr. Darcy," said Mrs Collins.

"Thank you, Charlotte, I'll read it later."

"Lizzie, you know, don't you, that if you ever need anyone for anything you can come to me?"

"Of course, Charlotte dear."

He heard her shut her door softly, and decided to stay there until the ridiculous Collins invited him in or until Mrs Collins invited him to leave. Darcy hoped Miss Elizabeth would at least read the letter. That she would forgive him, he was not so sure at all. After a while, he heard the door open.

"Charlotte, I was so naive!"

"How so, Lizzie dear?"

"I thought love would be incredible and perfect and romantic but it is not! Wickham was amiable but too full of pretense. With him I felt less than with Mr. Collins, pardon me. The colonel too was amiable, but my affections were not excited!" Darcy did not know what to make of her declare.

"Lizzie, do you love Mr. Darcy?"

"I don't know what love is, Charlotte. But if it causes this much pain, I don't know if it is worth it."

"Dear, it is not how painful it is that determines love, it is if you are willing to suffer through it to have a chance of happiness with the right person."

"Well, I don't want it," she said quietly, but it was enough to make Darcy's heart drop and eyes water. He heard fainter still, "and even if I change my mind it will take time for me to forgive him."

"I think that will be reassurance enough for Mr. Darcy regardless of how long. His countenance, when he handed me the letter, was very grave indeed."

"Was it?"