Chapter 8:Something Unexpected
April 12 2016
Nakamura took me to this milkshake place today, it wasn't like I thought it would be at all. It was "magical" I guess. I never really believed in magic after my father started drinking. I know that Koro-Sensei being our teacher should probably defy that idea but maybe he's an alien and that's not magic, right? Ugh….I'm dancing around the truth right now. This is my journal so...I'm just gonna spit it out.
I have a crush on my Assassination Teacher, Sargent Akabane.
I know it's probably wrong and something I shouldn't feel but I can't help the way I feel. The milkshake didn't help either, Amber eyes, red like his hair, who else could she have been talking about? I doubt he would even think of me, I doubt I even exist in his eyes. I'm invisible to everyone, expect Koro-Sensei and Nakamura it seems. I don't know what to do, a part of me says to go for it. Tell him how I feel, or do something. But then what? Ask him out? I can't ask my teacher out, that….that's just….WEIRD.
Ugh...thank god tomorrow is Saturday. It's getting late I think I'm done writing for now.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
I close the cover of my book placing it back in my bag and sliding it under my bed. The last thing I wanted was for my father to find this, I don't even wanna think of what he'd say, would he lecture me, yell at me for being gay, for crushing on my teacher? Or would he not care and down another bottle of beer while he complained about how miserable he was….He wasn't the only one who felt miserable.
I wish I could tell him a lot of things, but I know a lot of those things he wouldn't accept or would just be in denial of saying that I am just going through a phase. That's what he told me when I said I wanted to be a teacher, he said teacher isn't a mainly job, that I should be a businessman….
I don't talk to dad anymore about what I think or feel, I just nodd quietly to whatever he says and try to talk as little as possible with him….I love him…..I just don't respect him. I sat up from my bed and check my phone for the time seeing I had a new message from Nakamura,
.
.
[Nakamura 11:30pm]: Hey I heard there having a cool street festival with dancing and food tomorrow, wanna go?
I smiled down at the text, it was nice of her to invite me...but I couldn't go no matter how badly I wanted to.
[Nagisa 11:38pm]: Sorry for the late reply, I can't go I have something to do tomorrow I'm sorry.
[Nakamura 11:38pm]: It's fine I'm sure u where daydreaming about a certain teacher of ours.
( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)
[Nagisa 11:39pm]: I wasn't, your just a sucker for shipping.
[Nakamura 11:39pm]: Damn right, (¬‿¬) but if u want to come tomorrow let me know and I'll pick u up.
[Nagisa 11:39pm]: Alright, I'm heading to bed I'm tired.
[Nakamura 11:40pm]: Noooooooo u must stay up! SLEEP IS 4 DA WEAK!
[Nagisa 11:41pm]: I'm not as strong as you Nakamura, I need sleep.
[Nakamura 11:41pm]: Ugh fine, gn
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
I woke up the next morning to the annoying sound of my alarm clock at my desk, truth be told I really really, really, really, REALLY, didn't want to get up. My brain felt like mush and I just wanted to rest but it was yet another thing I had to do.
I dragged my eyelids open as the sun glared in them I winced blocking the sun's bright light with my hand before reaching for my phone nearly falling off the bed, I shut off the alarm and checked the time.
5:00am
I rolled around a bit fussing with myself more than usual to get myself out of bed, once I finally did I brushed my teeth and then headed back to my room to put on my usual attire. The Khakis that seemed to hug my hips a little and the ocean blue polo shirt, thank god it had short sleeves. I don't think I could take the seat otherwise.
I then threw on some sports shoes and grabbed my phone and wallet and stuck them in my pants pockets. I opened my door quietly peering out into the living room, the coast was clear, surprisingly father wasn't in the living room.
I closed the door afraid to completely shut it as if the smallest noise would wake the sleeping lion in the other room. I was thankful for once for our assassination classes we had because it was getting easier to walk quietly.
I grabbed the door knob of my front door and glanced around once more, the coast was still clear good. I opened the door and as if to taught me the door squeaked,-have you ever been in a scenario where it's late at night and you go to get a snack from the fridge while everyone is asleep and your trying to be as quiet as possible but every object and floor board is suddenly louder than ever before-yeah that's exactly what this was.
.
.
.
.
.
By the time I got there it was about 6:30 around the time the place opened which was why I got up early, I walked. As I entered the small bell attached to the door chimed gently. The sound of soft jazz was playing in the background as the small conversations of people echoed through the cafe. It was a warm place, it was nice and the atmosphere was nice and it filled anyone who walked in her with a feeling of warmth and relaxation.
The floors where a dark oak, the walls a pale white, the booths and seats where all colored a warm sandy color and the tables the same color as the floors. Through the two ails of booths was a small relaxation area in the back filled with black couches and armchairs and even a small coffee table, basically a lounge area.
"Nagisa," A voice called and I looked over to the counter where all the pastry and sweet treats where stored while slowly taunting customs to buy them. "On time as always I see." Isogai greeted me, he was one of my classmates and was the reason I had this job.
I know I wasn't supposed to have one but like Isogai I needed the money for a roof that was barely staying over my head. I greeted him with a tired smile as I made my way behind the counter grabbing my chestnut colored apron and tied in on around me. It stopped at just about my thighs which was fine by me.
"Eh don't worry, the shift will be over before you know it." He said trying to cheer me up seeing the look on my face. I gave him a strained smile, "Thanks isogai." My job wasn't as glamorous as it looked. I was basically the busboy, my job was to go around cleaning tables, collecting and coffee or tea cups or any trash left in the lounge area or tables….and well I was lucky enough to not have to clean the bathroom that much. It was only if there was no one else available. Without much else conversation I made my way around the shop already picking up some leftover foam coffee cups and disposing of them, cleaning messy tables and ignoring some guys who constantly whistled at me saying things like, "hey sweetheart" or "hey baby," because I was obviously mistaken for a girl….
Shocking I know. Not all of the customers where like that, they were rare actually only the college kids or highschool students who washed in here, hell Isogai got cat called by girls too so It wasn't like I was the only one but even then it was rare. That's why I liked this place, it was nice and calming and usually customer are nice that and the jazz is relaxing and helps me forget about my problems even if it's just for a bit.
"Nagisa a group just cleared out from the lounge area can you go check it out?" Isogai notified I just finished cleaning one of the tables before nodding in his direction. "Sure,"
I made my way back to the small relaxation area noticing the new edition was a small bookshelf, I looked around for any trash and my eyes landed on an empty cup at the feet of someone, I walked a little closer hoping I wasn't disturbing them but when I reached down for the cup and stood up the head poked up from the book they were reading and I felt my head drop faster than a stone.
His eyes met mine in the same shock and surprise that I had been looking at him with. His mouth was slightly agaped and his head lifted from the palm of his hand having obviously been relaxed and very much into the book he was reading….
My heart was racing in my chest against my ribs my hands felt like and numb I shut my eyes tightly biting down on my tongue, gripping the empty cup so tightly that my nails dug through it into my hand so much that it hurt.
"E-excuse me sir sorry for disturbing you!" I said a little to loudly but it was the only thing I could get out, the only thing I could say weather it was perfect or not. Before he had a chance to respond I bolted off away from him only hearing one word come from his mouth as I fled back to the counter.
.
.
.
.
"Nagisa wait!"
