A Lifetime of Servitudes
BELLA'S POV CH 9
I felt myself shiver as I began to wake up and open my eyes. I looked around the room and saw that I was still in Edward's room. What? Had I not been at Charlie's earlier? How the hell did I get back here?
Think Bella, what happened today? Let's see I remember Jacob telling me he loved me and begging me to choose him, then getting pissed and running away from me. Charlie, I remember dad talking to me, right? Yes, I talked to day about Jacob and Edward. I was crying and dad was holding me, right? Think Bella...I remember talking about Renee then him holding me again. The last thing I remember was telling him I loved him.
"Shit" I whispered to myself realizing I had fallen asleep on my father. That means everything else was a dream, right. Even Jacob making out with me? "Damn that was some dream to have." I whispered setting up on the side of the bed.
Jacob and Edward fighting, was that a dream too? It had to be, right? Carlisle had said Edward was gone for a few days. That means that everybody acting like they belong to the nut house was a dream too.
"Damn that was some dream." I sighed frustrated. Why couldn't have normal dreams now that I would be able to sleep again. I stood up and walked to the broken window and looked out at the tree line. I was remembering when Edward had taken me tree climbing the first time I had come here and met his family. That was such a happy day for us. I loved him so much then; I'd given my life up for him that day if he'd asked me too. He was my life then, I'd fallen in love so quickly for him. It was almost unreal to me; it seemed like another lifetime looking back on it now.
Could I leave him now? I love him, but not as much as I love my Jacob. It took my heart to stop beating for me to realize exactly how much I loved and needed Jacob in my life. He completed my soul, and although I didn't know or understand why I felt that way then, I do know now. Can I break Nessie's heart and leave her father for Jacob just to make myself happy?
"What am I going to do?" I asked the air as I stood there looking out the window. My eye caught movement as Jacob stepped out from behind the trees looking up at me. He looked so sad, I wanted to cry, and I'd done that to him, yet again. What is wrong with me?
I watched this beautiful man step forward and grin. "My Jacob" I whispered to myself. It seemed that his name was flowing my lips like the air I was breathing now without my knowledge, it just slipped out.
"Back up babe" He said getting ready to sprint forward and jump through the window. He jumped and landing directly in front of me and smiled. "That never gets old." He whispered chuckling as he leaned down and grazed his lips softly over mine.
"My Bella and yes I'm your Jacob."I heard the words falling from his lips as my eyes rolled back in my head and shut. He had raised my chin up to his lips with his finger tip and began kissing me slowly then running his nose down my neck.
"Mmm" He moaned, you smell so good babe."He whispered right before he began placing wet open mouth kisses around my neck. "Mm-hum you taste good to beautiful." I moaned feeling the juice begin to pool between my legs. "Mum...that smells even better sexy." Jake groaned rubbing his cock against my stomach as he began pushing me back gently until the back of my knees hit the bed and I fell back.
"Jacob, we can't do this, not right now." I tried telling him as my brain was screaming at me to shut up and make love to this beautiful man. I wanted him and my body was craving his. I watched as a slight frown graced his handsome face before he shoved it away.
He ignored me as he leaned over lifting my feet up and removing my shoes and tossing them over his shoulder. Jacob then ran his hands slowly up my legs stopping briefly over my mound leaning down and placing a kiss there as he used his hands and unsnapped my pants. He pulled my pants down while starring intensely into my eyes. He stood up and kicked his shoes off and slid his own pants off.
Still never removing his eyes from mind he pulled his white tee shirt off and threw it on the ground then crawling over me on the bed and pulling mine off too. I heard him sigh when he looked down seeing me in only my white satin bra and matching boy shorts. "God you are so beautiful babe." He whispered tugging off my shorts and unsnapping my bra.
I feel back on the bed feeling nervous at being completely naked in front of him. Edward had been the only man to ever see me naked. Feeling embarrassed I tried to cover my breast with my hands but he stopped me, taking each of my hands and placing kisses on my wrist then laying them to my side.
"No babe, none of that, you will not cover up your beautiful body. You're an angel Bella, why don't you see how beautiful you are?"He asked but not waiting for a reply before slipping out of his black boxers.
I was trying to tell myself this was wrong and find the will to stop it but I couldn't. Both sides of my heart were screaming at me.
"STOP BELLA YOUR MARRIED AND WHAT ABOUT NESSIE!" The right side screamed.
"NO THIS IS YOUR NATURAL PATH, OUR JACOB, WE BELONG TOGETHER!"The left side screamed.
He scooted off the top of me and propped himself up on his knees beside me, looking down at me with so much love and passion in his eyes. I wanted him and only him, and I knew that now, but how can I hurt others just to make myself happy? Can't I ever make a decision and stick to it? I married Edward; I had vowed to love him and only him for all of eternity.
He leaned in kissing me moaning. "I love you Bella give me this, please. I don't ask much of you; please give me this chance to show you I love you. I promise I would never hurt you and you won't regret giving us this chance if you'd just relax and let our nature take its course."
I then shut my brain down, closed it off to the thoughts that I was married, that I had a daughter. I fought the disgust of the fact that we were in Edwards bed in his room, the very room that we had made out in several time. I closed my eyes as the passion took over me whispering. "My Jacob, please make love to me."
His rough manly hands ran over my naked stomach sending shivers straight down my spine. "Mmm beautiful" He breathed blowing warm air across my stomach. I could feel my flesh screaming for the warmth of his hands to touch the cold spots. "So soft" He whispered bringing his lips to kiss circles around my belly button. "Mmm Jacob" I moaned softly bringing my hand up and running my fingers through his soft hair.
He began slowly caressing up my stomach toward my breast and began tracing lines around my nipples watching my eyes intently. "There so hard for me Babe." I brought my hands up to touch his chest but he stopped me before my hands could begin its roaming.
"No babe" He whispered shaking his head back and forth at me. I frowned wanted to feel his body under my fingers. I needed to feel him to know this was real, that I was really here, with my Jacob feeling this comfortable and loved with him. How had my life changed so much in less than twenty four hours?
"Jacob please" I moaned pleading for him to touch me more. Jake leaned over me and laid his forehead against the crook of my neck and sighed. "Babe I have dreamed of this very moment my whole life, please, I want to take our time. Bella I need to show you how much I love you. When I am through making love to you, there will never again be a question in your mind as too who you were meant to be with or who you belong too."
He slowly began to caress my shoulders and down my arms to my finger tips and back up. He stopped seeing the wedding rings on my finger and smirked. "You won't need this anymore." Jacob said while sticking my finger in his mouth, sucking, sliding them off with his teeth then spit them out in the floor as if they were poison.
My body was burning like lava rocks and the feeling of my heart pounding was overwhelming me, I wanted to move faster. I needed to feel him; I wanted to touch him too. I moved my hands to his chest again and dragged my nails down over his nipples causing him to moan softly before he pulled my hands away and placing them back down on the bed by my sides. "Leave them there."
"Please Jacob I need to feel you too."I begged as he ignored my request and began licking and nipping at my pink hard nipples. "Oh yes" I moaned louder. I felt his hand running down my stomach and sliding over my mound.
He painfully slowly ran the tip of his finger over my clit. It was taking everything in me to not grab him and shove him down and take him, but he wanted our first time to be special. I felt the tingles in my clit began to travel down my lips and through the walls of my vagina as he slipped two fingers inside of me while rubbing my sensitive clit with his rough thumb. "Oh god" I groaned bucking my hips forward against his hand.
"That's it babe, your body knows who she wants." He whispered with a taunting tone, daring me to deny the truth. His fingers began exploring furiously inside of me as I arched my back into the bed, bringing fistfuls of sheets up toward my face. I wanted to scream, I wanted the whole world to know that my Jacob was finally making me his.
The amazing pleasure he was giving me was sending shocks throughout my whole body. I couldn't keep my hands to myself anymore, it was just too hard. I wrapped my small hand around his large cock. I silently wondered how in the hell that would ever fit inside of me without ripping, but let the thought go as I leaned over and ran the tip of my tongue over his head. "Bella" He roughly rasped.
I knew I had him then, he wouldn't be able to stop me when he was feeling just as good. I pushed my mouth down over his cock taking in as much as my petite mouth would allow. Sliding my lips up and down and using my hand at his base pumping and twisting slightly, he caved, falling back on the bed off of his knees. "Fuck Bella"
I smiled enjoying the fact that I was able to cause such pleasure in him. I was so tempted to just give in to my needs and jump down on his cock and ride him wild and hard, but I tried to maintain the slow sensual pace he was setting for us. "Mmm you taste so good babe." I moaned sending vibration down his cock as I spoke and sucked at the same time.
"Damn" He whispered bucking his hips toward me face. His cock was throbbing with every suck in and twitching with each blow of air out. "Bella you're killing me babe." Jacob groaned taking his hands and pulling my hips toward him. He took my leg and pulled it over his chest, my ass facing him, lifted my hips and pulled me back. I nearly came all over his face the very second his tongue began lapping up my juices. "Babe you're so wet for me."
"Mmm, yes, just for you babe." I said sending the vibration down his cock again causing him to groan and grab two fistfuls of my ass cheeks. As if answering my silent pleas he slide two fingers back inside of me and began pumping in and out while licking up my juice as it flowed down his fingers.
"God babe you taste so good." He moaned pumping his finger faster as I sucked harder. I wanted to taste him. "Oh babe I want to taste you so bad." I whispered sucking him deep into my throat.
My skin felt like it was on fire as my clit erupted. "Oh my god Jake!" I yelled. He pushed me off of his face swinging my legs around and flipping me over on the bed. I starred deeply into his passionate eyes as he opened my legs sliding in between my thighs. Looking intently into my eyes but not giving me a chance to deny him before he slid his cock inside of me slowly.
"Mmm babe" He moaned never removing his eyes from mine. I frowned seeing two single tears run down his cheeks. I lifted up my hands cupping his face and stilling my hips. "Jacob" I questioned.
Was this not what he wanted? Had he changed his mind? Did I do something wrong? I had a million questions flashing through my mind seeing the sadness in his eyes. "Their happy tears Bella, I have only dreamed of feeling you wrapped around my cock, every single time I have closed my eyes for the past year."
Jacob making love to me felt like nothing I had ever experienced with Edward before. Just like the kisses from earlier, Jacob's kiss was so warm and passionate, it sent electrical shocks to every single nerve ending in my body.
"Jacob babe, I love you so much." I whispered thrashing my hips against him as he pushed in and out bring us to the top of our peek. "I know babe, I know, I'm just so happy you see it to now." He rushed out crashing his lips back down onto mind kissing me feverously.
"Jacob...oh babe..."I moaned feeling my body erupting with an orgasm. "That's it babe, cum for me and only me, give me all of you babe, I won't to feel you drench my cock Bella." He whispered grazing his tongue lightly over my bottom lip.
I dug my hands in his chest fighting the screams begging to be released as he fasten his pace, trusting almost violently now inside me as his own release came from feeling me clinching around his cock milking him, drawing and pulling him deeper inside of me. "Oh my god babe, I'm in heaven." He rushed out collapsing down on my chest and closing his eyes.
"I love you so fucking much Bella, that's all I know, is you. There has never been anyone else, just you babe, just you. You own me Bella, I will forever be your Jacob and you will always be my Bella. Don't deny our love babe, please don't." He whispered as I felt his tears run from his cheeks onto the bare skin of my breast.
Jacob was crying and I was crying hearing those beautiful words coming from his mouth and knowing I would never be able to stay away from him now, no matter what happened with Edward or Nessie. Jacob was my life now and he had always been. I was just blinded by the sparkles of a diamond that should have been buried long ago.
"Jacob and Bella" I whispered wiping my face and placing a sweet kiss on the top of his head as heard his breathing slow and he began to softly snore.
