Yay for a quick update? A lot of conversation, and Clarke coming to grips with how things are going to be. A glimpse into her future as well. Please update because at least ten reviews per chapter means faster updates for you!


Trigedasleng


True to her word Clarke collected Jacob just past sunrise. She refused conversation, just as she had refused to speak with Lexa further regarding the threat to their people after their emotional confrontation. She let herself have that one moment of weakness with the green-eyed woman. For a long time after, they sat upon the beach listening to the waves crash without a word spoken between them. It was calm and the tension eased between them with Lexa's obscure apology hanging in the air, until she attempted to broach the subject of the Azgeda.

The Ice Nation was one of the twelve clans, a member of the Coalition and also rival of the Trikru. Clarke knew of the twelve clans due to Luna's schooling, but the Ice Nation was a clan shrouded in mystery. Very little was known of them. They had strict rules in regards to consorting with the other clans. Trade was limited, as was travel. What she knew of the Ice Nation's leader was even less. Luna refused to speak of few things, and this topic was one of them.

Of a few things she was certain. One was that the Azgeda leader captured and beheaded the one woman Lexa had ever loved. The second being that two of the Azgeda's emissary's were killed in the attack on Tondc, an attack that Lexa and herself had allowed to transpire. At the time, she considered Tondc's sacrifice a necessary evil, one that weighed almost as heavily as the lives lost within Mount Weather. The politics within the Trigedakru had not concerned her. Now, she found herself imbedded within them and wondered how much further entangled she would become.

Leaving Lexa at sunrise was easier than she thought.

"We have things to discuss, Klark."

Clarke had paused without looking back. Her mind was focused on retrieving Jacob and heading to Amelia's. "It can wait."

"It cannot wait for much longer."

Clarke said little to Liam and his family as she gathered the essentials. She ignored their questioning and unapologetic eyes. However saddened they appeared their loyalty was to their Commander. She brought herself to Amelia's dwelling and knocked knowing they were up by the smoke exiting the home. As far as she knew, Amelia had never born children. Her and her husband lived quietly, and were somewhat reclusive compared to the other members of the Floudonkru she was familiar with.

Her husband, Jonah, opened the entrance to the modest dwelling. He was dressed for a days work on the boats his people were named for with fishing nets and hooks. His beard held patches of grey, and his hair was peppered. The hands holding his tools were weathered but strong.

"Good morning. I am sorry to disturb your family, but-"

In that moment, his dark skinned wife put a hand to his shoulder. Jonah turned giving his wife room, and Clarke smiled tiredly.

"Could we impose on you for a few days?" she asked bluntly adjusting the pack on her shoulder and holding up Jacob.

Amelia reached for Jacob and Jonah kissed his wife's cheek and nodded to Clarke, taking his leave for the day.

"Come in Skai Prisa. Let us find you something to eat."

Clarke closed the door behind her and set her pack down. She took a seat and dropped her head onto folded arms after lying Jacob on the floor. He immediately began to explore the new territory. She smiled at his improved crawling and the fact that he was operating his right leg with more ease. Amelia placed a modest breakfast in front of her. Not to appear rude, she began to eat despite the unease of her stomach. Between bites of food, she relayed the last day to Amelia. Amelia was quiet, and listened attentively without asking a single question. She appeared neither surprised nor confused with any of this information.

"What will you do now?" she asked once Clarke had finished.

"I don't know." Clarke's hair felt in need of a good wash. The braids were helplessly tangled and she was fairly sure sand was lodged in her ears.

"I need to find out how much Luna knows." With an almost wary but piercing stare she turned her full attention to the Floudonkru woman. "How much do you know?"

"Heda's family is well known." Clarke closed her eyes for a brief moment. Of course they were. "When the next Heda is called upon the family is compensated. Heda was called as a young girl, even prior her position as Anya's second."

"Compensated?" She questioned her brows furrowed.

"The position of Heda is not a long lived one" Amelia said carefully.

Clarke took a moment to reflect on this knowledge. It made sense, and it was a sobering thought and one she felt Lexa was aware of. With great power also came a very large target on your head. She thought back to the pictures the Mountain Men had of her and Lexa when they were trying to assassinate them.

"But that would also mean she was Heda when she was Anya's second."

Amelia nodded. "Yes, because of her inexperience in this life, despite the spirit of Heda that lived inside of her, it was decided she would serve as a second until she was deemed ready. It also ensured that the Heda would not die needlessly."

Clarke swallowed thickly. It was difficult to imagine that Lexa's entire life was designed from an early age. "How do you know so much?"

Amelia quieted and assisted with Jacob's attempts at pulling himself to stand with the use of a chair. Clarke eyed him proudly even as he fell on his rump.

"Jonah," she began. "He was born in Polis. It is also the original city of the Trikru, and once Heda united the twelve clans, it became the crown of our civilization. It is also where Heda was born."

Clarke listened taking in this new information. "I don't understand why she chose now. She knew I was here the entire time. Luna told her, I know she did. But what I don't understand is why now?"

At this question Amelia averted her eyes. "You know something don't you?"

"There is much dissent within the clans."

Clarke nodded acknowledging her statement. "What I don't understand is why. Is it because of the Azgeda?"

"Yes and no," she responded hesitantly.

"Amelia, if you know something, you must tell me, please."

Amelia met her eyes somberly. "You are new to this life on the ground. You have become a formidable leader within our world. Your actions at Mount Weather have made you a legend and have caused others to question Heda. They say she is weak for accepting the bargain."

"What else do they say?" Clarke asked with bated breath.

"They say you were sent to Earth to pass judgment on the wicked and Heda has displeased you."

"Damn right she has," Clarke muttered angrily.

Amelia shook her head. "You misunderstand."

"Then enlighten me." Amelia hesitated and Clarke realized she was afraid to speak. "I won't tell anyone. You have nothing to fear from me."

Amelia considered her words. "There are…people who believe that the Heavens sent you to rectify the wrongs Heda has failed to protect us from. And now that she has wronged the heavens, she should not be in power and is no longer qualified to rule."

Clarke thought it fitting that Lexa's argument for abandoning her was fear of retribution from her people.

"She needs me." Amelia eyed her curiously. "Lexa told me that she wanted us to be allies again. No wonder, she can't control her own people let alone her armies and she thinks my approval will regain the trust of hers."

Clarke turned towards Amelia. "Am I right?"

"You are not wrong." Amelia's eyes were deliberating.

"But what does she need me for? She mentioned a threat to our people, both the Trigedakru and the Skaikru. Do you know anything about that?"

Amelia did not respond, and Clarke shook her head. "I don't expect you to. You're not one of her generals."

Clarke cooed at Jacob as he gurgled and pulled himself up and proceeded to cruise along the furniture. He was de-weighted on his right leg as much as possible as he moved. Clarke stabilized him and guided his right leg, increasing the weight bearing on his less developed limb. He stumbled but she supported his torso and facilitated his next step with tactile cues.

"I am not one of Heda's generals, but I was a general once." Clarke furrowed her brow. "I do not speak of it. It is why I have never born children."

"I thought that was…a choice?"

She nodded. "It was at the time, but I was young." Amelia closed her eyes, and Clarke had never seen her so…pained. "I was not born in Leston, or in Polis as my husband." She took a steadying breath and Clarke waited, feeling that this was private information and unwilling to pry.

"I was of the Azgeda and an esteemed member of the court of Queen Nia."

Clarke blinked. "The ruler of the Ice Nation."

Amelia nodded. "My family was of noble blood, and we were privileged. I grew enamored with the Queen, and swore myself to her. I chose to enter into her service as her personal guards instead of marry. My parents were honored. You must be chosen for such a task" Amelia clarified.

"What does this have to do with children?" Clarke asked not wishing to be rude or devalue her tale.

"I held a position that required barrenness."

"The Queen requires her generals to have a hysterectomy?" At Amelia's confused expression Clarke rephrased. "An operation to remove the female reproductive system." Technology on the ground was crude at best, besides that of the Mountain Men. She shuddered to think of how they performed a hysterectomy without sterile procedures. "Why would she ask this of you?"

"No life is above the Queen. Those in her personal employ do not have the ability to create a successor." Clarke shuddered to think of such a ruler. No life could be more important than that of the Queen, even a potential life. Therefore, all hope for a family or a life beyond that of the Queen were removed, permanently.

She held Jacob close ignoring his audible complaints at being disturbed from climbing furniture.

"She maintains power by pouring fear into her subjects. She is ruthless, cunning, ambitious." Her eyes glazed seeing into a different life, a time long ago. "She is also charismatic. I felt such love and admiration for her."

"What changed?" Clarke whispered.

"I defected and fled to Polis seeking sanctuary, and then I met Jonah."

Amelia's dark eyes narrowed and her jaw clenched. "I saw what she truly was. A monster. She tortured an innocent, and beheaded her out of spite. I put the woman's head in a bag for a messenger to deliver to her lover."

Clarke went cold. "Costia?" Amelia nodded slowly after meeting her gaze. "And Lexa's know this?" Lexa seemed like the type of person to take revenge on her enemies.

"She does."

"And she didn't kill you," she said it awkwardly and somewhat disbelievingly.

"I was detained and questioned relentlessly, tortured to an extent, but it was small in comparison to what I had already suffered at the hands of my Queen, and what would happen should they find me."

"Do you know what happened to your family?" she could not help but wonder. This woman's story intrigued her. Amelia had suffered greatly and her ability to reconnect and continue to live inspired something that had been long buried within Clarke since she had pulled that lever in the mountain and irradiated level five.

"Most likely dead for my betrayal."

Her voice was like steel, and Clarke could not resist laying a comforting hand to the woman's forearm. "You did what you thought was best."

"As did you, Clarke." Amelia's hand covered her own. "We must always do what is best. It is not always the easiest way, and sometimes our loved ones suffer, but to sit idly by and do nothing, that is not in our nature. It is especially not in your nature Skai Prisa."

Amelia ran a thumb along Clarke's brow reverently. "Heda needs your strength to unite our people. She united with the Azgeda for fear of the Mountain Men."

The idea dawned in Clarke's mind rapidly. "But I eliminated the threat." Amelia nodded once more. "Lexa's trying to secure an alliance with the Skaikru before the Azgeda does."

"Now you understand." Amelia smiled proud that Clarke had finally drawn the conclusion she had. "Your people have the ability to use their technology."

"They wouldn't." Clarke refuted immediately but doubt plagued her. If her mother was the one leading….but she had left Bellamy in charge and she felt confidant that he would never let their people turn into the very thing they had destroyed. Bellamy always did what was required of him. They had traded time and time again being each other's moral compass since landing on Earth.

Jacob began to cry in her lap, and Clarke realized that she was in a more precarious position than she originally realized. If she did not ally with Lexa, she would be turning her back upon a people she had grown to love as dearly as her own. She also knew very little about the current state of the Skaikru so displaced was she from them. She also knew very little of the Ice Nation and their Queen. It was either ally with Lexa or Queen Nia. Accounts of Queen Nia did not inspire Clarke to seek her out as a potential ally. It was dangerous to leave her people vulnerable.

As she willed Jacob quiet, and failed, she realized that there was other avenues Lexa could use to force her into submission. In her heart, she felt the Commander would not do such a thing as to use a child against her, but she had been wrong before. What she needed was to construct her own protection for her people, for all of them and eliminate the threat. Or at least form a formidable empire and army to defend if needed and retaliate if necessary. The idea sounded mad and impossible at best.

The very idea was giving her a headache. Moves and counter moves. She missed playing the fun kind of chess on the Ark with Wells.

"I need an army" she sighed using her shirt to wipe Jacob's tears and snot. She no longer cared whether she could trust Amelia. She was going to find her way through this one way or another.

"You have more of one than you think" Amelia said slowly, cautiously.

Clarke lowered her voice, sensing the careful words and dangerous territory they were heading. "Skaikru?"

"They are those…" she began, "who might wish to fight for a woman they believe worthy. Those who feel wronged of the doings of their current leader and wish to be free of all threats."

"I can't ask people to throw away their lives for me." Clarke responded slowly unsure of Amelia's exact meaning.

"Not just for you, but for someone worthy."

"Are you suggesting I lead a rebellion and take down not one but two regimes?" Clarke stated bluntly and watched as Amelia sat frozen waiting for death to befall her at Clarke's own hands. After a few moments passed, Amelia remained no less tense but looked ready to resume their conversation.

The idea sounded absurd to her. She could not overhaul Lexa and declare war on a people she had little notion of. "You over estimate the faith the Trigedakru, and even my own people, have in me."

"You undervalue your influence, if I am not too bold."

Clarke grinned. "This entire conversation is too audacious." Amelia's ebony skin began to loose luster and Clarke quickly rectified her statement. "For either of us."

"Say, I'm onboard. Partly. I don't want to overtake the Trigedakru, but I do want to take control of my life and not be anyone's puppet, let alone Lexa's. I just don't want any one to die. I can't stand it."

Amelia laid a hand on hers. "Many more will die before this is over. It is the way of things."

"I don't like the way of things" Clarke eyed her. "You're very clever. You see all the colors in between, and the actions behind the words." She licked her lips gathering her courage. "You say I have people, a following, even an army if I want it?'

Amelia nodded. "You have those in both Polis and Leston who would follow you if you asked it of them. I have no doubt it is the same with other clans. Your Jacob will secure the allegiance of the Nomads at the very least. "

"You're sure of this?"

"On my honor."

Clarke nodded to herself more than Amelia. "I need a convoy. Luna wanted me to have one for Polis. She wants me to replace her. I wasn't sure of it when she told me, but now I know I can't be under someone. Not again." She paused and lowered her voice. "I need to start gathering those I can trust, or trying to find those that are trust worthy. Apparently, I'm not a very good judge of character."

Amelia chose to respond. "You believe in the goodness of others. It is a rare quality in this day. As a leader you are not afforded to give others opportunity to deceive you."

"Did Queen Nia allow you to speak with such liberty?" Clarke raised an eyebrow pointedly.

"Yes, and no" she said rising from her seat.

She walked over to her worktable and proceeded to shuffle through a series of dresses. She pulled a beautiful dress over a mannequin and a decorative chest plate over another. Clarke watched her ruffle the skirt and pick up a needle threading through the gown lifting the hemline. She gave Clarke a handful of pins and proceeded to show her how to measure and lift the hemline so that she could follow with needle and thread.

"The lady Queen is callous, but gifted. She welcomes truth from her most loyal subjects. A great leader does not shy from the harshness of truth, but meets it head on."

"Does she also help her peasants makes dresses?" Clarke joked with a sparkle in her eye.

Amelia raised her brow and ushered Clarke along. "No she does not. Such things are beneath her. Such things are beneath you Skai Prisa."

"No they aren't."

Amelia paused and met her eyes. "And that is why your strength is vast and people follow you."

"If Lexa looses her following for saving her people, how can I ever expect to retain their loyalty?"

"It is weakness, not mercy, love or compassion that the Trigedakru will scorn you for."

"Lexa told me love was weakness." She raised her head and cursed after nicking her finger. She stuck her finger in her mouth and shook the digit until the sharp pain lessened.

"It depends on how you use love. Do you hide behind it, or does it embody your spirit? You have become a well-known warrior and leader because you have fought and bled to protect those you love. That is not weakness that is the best kind of strength. It is the kind of strength that others will follow you to the ends of the earth for. "

Clarke thought upon her words. Costia had been tortured and killed because she was close to Lexa. Showing her strength as a leader and resilience as a woman, Lexa rose above her heart and forged an alliance instead of waging war with the woman who had killed her beloved. It was why she had vowed never to show such weakness again-love. To truly love someone meant risking yourself to be hurt. Vulnerability meant strength. With the right person.

"This dress is very pretty." Clarke commented watching Amelia finish the hemming with ease. She wondered how someone who must have been a proud warrior serving directly under the Queen would have had the courage to leave and seek refuge with a people other than her own. It must have been difficult.

"No, Jacob, stop." She uncurled his fist from the material before he could damage it.

"Who is it for?"

"A princess."

Her casual remark caused Clarke pause. Amelia continued on without missing a beat. Clarke took in the white ruffled skirt with different eyes appraising its beauty.

"This is the first layer. The bodice over lays it and cinches with a waist belt."

"How did you learn to do this?"

A smile came to her lips. "My mother, she was very skilled."

"I want you to come with me when I go to Polis." Amelia stopped and turned assessing her. "I need a convoy, and I want you to be a part of it. Jonah as well. He knows Polis, and you've told me he has family there." Members of the Trikru were bred warriors.

Clarke felt awkward addressing her back, but carried on. "That is, only if you want to. I won't force you into this. Either of you."

The words hung in the air between them. Clarke was asking Amelia to give up her life of peace in Leston. And to be a part of something bigger, and possibly more dangerous than even she could fathom.

"I'm too old to be your second." Amelia said at long last and then added, "You'll need one."

"I have one in mind." And she did. "You might die" she added wanting to verbalize the uncertainty of her life if she followed her down this road.

"We all die."

This was true.

"Can I trust you?"

"You'll find out."

This was also true. They were off to a good start.

"If you betray me, I will kill you." She fingered the knife at her waist giving Amelia her utmost grave expression before cocking her head and smiling.