=Chapter 9 – Setting the Stage=
==An Hour Later==
Baki raised his hand for a stop, "Hold up, we're being followed." Temari looked around warily, "By who?" Four sets of footsteps landed behind them, "By us," Kakashi declared as Squad 7 hopped or in Sakura's case flew out of the trees. Baki looked at him, "Why?"
"We have elected to tag along and help out where we can," Kakashi replied casually, "Besides, from what your clone told me it sounds like Shukaku alone isn't enough to beat the Kazekage should it turn into a fight, which you seem to agree with me it is likely to. So you need the extra leverage we can provide. Also, Naruto would never be able to sit idle while his friends were in danger. It's something I taught them all perhaps a little too well. So, you can let us come along, or I can remember the way to Hidden Sand well enough that we can follow you anyway. Either way, you'll have our help."
Baki frowned, "This is an internal affair of the Village Hidden in the Sand, it is not your problem." "Actually," Kakashi countered, "Hidden Sand is an ally of Hidden Leaf, and the current leadership of your village intends to betray ours in a manner which is nothing short of an act of war. If you cannot force them off that course, then my team will "persuade" them that it is a very, VERY bad idea. I think Shukaku's told you enough to know what the Nine Tailed Fox can do when she's pissed. The point is, we're not staying out of it, so you'd be better off accepting our help and using the leverage that a Nine Tailed Fox on standby provides to work a peaceful solution."
Baki's eye twitched, "You can't possibly have authorization for this…" Kakashi shrugged, "I'm sure we'll be fine. Lord Hokage would send a team or ten anyway, and if it's an unsanctioned run by a team of genin and a Jonin who's a well-known basket case, then Hidden Leaf can honestly say it had nothing to do with it." Baki was clearly torn on the matter, then Gaara spoke, "If you wish to help then I see no harm in accepting your assistance. If destroying Hidden Sand becomes necessary, Shukaku and I will need help."
The other Sand-nin stared at him in mild horror and Gaara met their gaze levelly, "Don't look so surprised. The village hates and fears me, I won't even begin to delude myself into thinking anyone in Sand cares about me other than the three of you except as a weapon or a monster. I do not intend to leave our father in his current position to destroy Hidden Sand with his bad decisions. If anyone's going to destroy that village, it will be me. They have one chance to persuade me I'm wrong in thinking they're not worth saving, if they fail, then after Shukaku and I go on a rampage that village will never forget, we're defecting to Hidden Leaf if they'll have us."
The other Sand-nin looked like they wanted to protest, but they were having a hard time coming up with an argument in the face of Gaara's steady gaze. Gaara looked at them, "Temari, how many friends do you have in Hidden Sand besides Kankuro and sensei? How many boys chase after you, falling all over themselves for your affection and showing you the attention we both know you deserve? How many people at all show you the respect you have earned?" Temari flinched, and after a moment said quietly, "none."
Gaara turned to Kankuro, "Kankuro, how many times have you asked that old bat Chiyo to train you?" Kankuro flinched, "More than I can count." "You are the son of the Kazekage and one of the finest puppeteers in Sand, certainly far above the rest of our generation. She should be honored to teach you, but she blows you off every time you ask without even considering it," Gaara pointed out. Kankuro grimaced and looked at the ground, "I never knew you paid attention to that…"
"Gaara actually pays quite a lot of attention to both of you," Shukaku quipped from where he had been snugly nestled on Gaara's head, "you're the only people in Sand that he likes. The only reason he hasn't squashed that old hag already for turning Kankuro down so often is because then she'd never be able to teach him." Temari couldn't help it and a little "Aw…" escaped her. Kankuro snorted slightly with laughter, "Thanks Gaara." "That's what family is for is it not?" Gaara asked with a small smile.
Temari and Kankuro's eyes snapped up to meet his and a moment later he was wrapped in the arms of his siblings. He was still unused to human contact, so it took him a minute but he did hug them back. The Leaf nin couldn't help but smile at the scene as Baki struggled to find a way he could protect his village from the destruction he was seeing as ever more likely. Of all the Sand-nin present, he was the only one who had any real loyalty to Hidden Sand.
When the siblings broke apart, Gaara looked at Baki, "Sensei, who stopped you when you were on the verge of committing suicide after everyone shunned and scorned you for choosing your team's lives over the mission?" Baki flinched like Gaara had punched him and Temari and Kankuro looked at Gaara in surprise. There was no comeback to that. Kakashi flinched too although nobody was quite sure why.
After a moment Baki nodded grimly, "Alright," He turned to Kakashi and bowed slightly, "Welcome to the revolution Kakashi Hatake and Leaf Squad Seven, it is an honor to work with you all." Kakashi bowed in return, Squad 7 following his lead and bowing as well, "We will help you to the best of our abilities."
==Meanwhile==
There weren't many things that could make Hiruzen Sarutobi actually worry. He was a very confident man and rightly so, but when Kakashi's shadow clone finished his report on the situation with Hidden Sand, the God of Shinobi was pale and sweating. Hiruzen took a few moments and then nodded, "Very well. You are dismissed." Kakashi's shadow clone nodded and dispersed. In not ordering them back, Hiruzen had given Kakashi and Squad 7 unofficial approval to continue. Now Hiruzen sat back in his chair and took an exceptionally nervous puff of his pipe.
Jiraiya grimly materialized seemingly out of thin air in the corner, "Where am I needed Sensei?" Hiruzen looked at the scroll detailing the plans for the so-called "Konoha Crush" which would allow Leaf forces to fend it off easily. After a moment of consideration, "I seem to recall hearing that Hidden Sand has some delightful ramen. Would you mind going and supervising our greatest ramen critic while he samples it? I understand that sand snakes are quite a problem in the desert. You know how to deal with those."
Jiraiya nodded at the implied order, "I'm on it." He stepped to the open window and Body Flickered away. A moment later Danzo stepped out of the shadows, "Shall we cast a shadow across the sand then?" Hiruzen shook his head, "The tree needs its roots close and deep, listening for the sound of trouble, muffling it where possible. A murder of crows might be helpful as well if you can find one." Danzo nodded, "Of course." Hiruzen propped his elbows on the desk and steepled his fingers to brace his forehead against as Danzo turned and disappeared into the shadows. Hiruzen pressed the intercom button to call his secretary, "Mari, I need every Jonin in Hidden Leaf, Zabuza Momochi and ANBU Commander Ghost in here now." "Yessir." Hiruzen turned and looked out the window, taking a deep drag on his pipe, war had come again.
==The Next Evening==
After Baki had called stop for the evening, they had run all night and all day and were in sore need of a break, Kakashi set Squad 7 to light practice. Sakura was set to moving kunai around her in orbits of varying speeds, Naruto worked on channeling wind chakra around his hands and Sasuke attempted to track a shuriken under three cups that Kakashi shuffled at lightning speeds.
The Sand Siblings and Baki swapped glances and quickly set about practicing lightly as well. Temari ran through her forms with her fan at half speed, Gaara manipulated his sand into various shapes, Baki practiced with his wind blades and Kankuro unwrapped his puppet and started manipulating it expertly through what could be called an experimental kata. Kankuro's attention wasn't entirely on his puppet though, and after a few moments he had to ask, "Sakura right?"
Sakura cracked an eye from her meditative position in the midst of the eighteen kunai she had orbiting her in three rings, two going clockwise and a wobbly one counter clockwise, "Yes?" Kankuro looked closer, "Where are your strings?" Sakura opened her eyes fully and looked at him, "Strings?"
Kankuro frowned, "Yeah, I manipulate my puppet with chakra strings. I've never seen anyone manipulate objects remotely without chakra strings, but I can't see yours." "Sakura doesn't use strings," Kakashi said without taking his eyes off the cups he was shuffling, "She coats the object in chakra and uses that to manipulate it. No contact required. Her control is honestly the greatest I've ever seen."
Kankuro's jaw dropped as he thought about the implications of that for his puppet techniques. The greatest danger for a puppeteer was the possibility that their strings could be cut, to be able to manipulate a puppet without that contact would be to have a nearly unstoppable puppet! It only took Kankuro a moment to reach a decision. He prostrated himself before Sakura, "Teach me oh mighty goddess!" Sakura blushed at the praise and her kunai almost fell out of the air in surprise as everyone paused for a moment to look at him, "What?"
Kankuro explained and she smiled, "Well why didn't you just say so? There was no need to call me a goddess, not that I mind," she added with a blush. She floated one of the kunai over to him and placed it in his hand, "coat that in chakra. When you have it coated, find the minimum amount of contact to maintain the coat, and then try to move your hand away from the kunai and maintain the chakra coating. I'm actually not sure how I pulled this off the first time, I was crazy high on a chakra overdose and after that it just felt natural, so all I can really give is tentative advice about what I did before that."
Kankuro quickly managed the chakra coating and spent the rest of the evening trying to maintain it without contact.
==The Next Day==
Sakura looked down at the others, "Hey guys, we're being followed. The chakra signature's as big as Naruto's and coming up fast." "How fast?" Kakashi asked. "On top of us right now fast," Sakura replied dryly as she paused midair and turned to look at the red and white figure that was zooming across the prairie. The others turned to look just in time to see the person launch himself over the top of the nearest hill like it was a ramp. It somersaulted through the air before landing on one foot. The white haired man in red hopped on the foot he had landed on with a fist raised and a hand extended in front of him and a huge grin, "It is I! The one and only monk of Mount Myoboku! The mighty Sannin and teacher of the Fourth Hokage! The great and powerful Toad Sage!" He brought his foot down and a toad as tall as he was appeared under him in a blast of chakra smoke, "Jiraiya!"
Before anyone could say anything, Naruto hopped on his foot with a fist raised and a hand extended in front of him before slamming his foot down with a finger pointed at Jiraiya, "Good for you!"
Whatever air of importance Jiraiya had been trying to achieve, that was the end of it as the toad, Temari, Kankuro, and Shukaku started laughing and everyone else grinned and tried very hard not to. Jiraiya visibly deflated and looked at Naruto tiredly, "Oh you are just like your mother…"
==Meanwhile==
The samurai eyed the massive sandstorm raging across the desert towards him like a thousand-meter high tidal wave. "This is the Fourth Kazekage's doing," the samurai's hunchbacked companion declared, "He's trying to stall us, and I'd have to say he's doing a fine job of it. We'll be stuck in the nearest safe place until it passes, and by the time that dies down, we'll be too late." The samurai stepped forward and reached for his sword, "It's a good thing Kaze-sama sent me then."
His companion skeptically eyed him like he was out of his mind, "What are you going to do? Cut the sand?" "No," the samurai replied, "Just the wind holding it up." His companion's eyes widened as the samurai said quietly, "Cloud Breaker." The samurai slashed even as he drew his blade, and the power of his technique generated a wall of force that rocketed across the desert. When it impacted the approaching storm, the storm stopped cold and then collapsed.
The hunchback stared as the samurai sheathed his sword, "Let's go." "You know that I'm turning you into a puppet if you die in front of me right?" Sasori asked as they set off again. "As long as you pair me with a cute blonde puppet of appropriate strength I'm flattered that you think so highly of me," Mimasu replied. "Fair enough," Sasori agreed as he made a mental note to find a strong cute blonde.
==Meanwhile==
A crow landed on its master's arm, and the dark haired man took the message from the crow's leg. The dark haired man quickly read the message before turning to his massive partner, "It would seem I'm being called home." The massive blue man grinned a grin full of razor sharp teeth, "well, I must say this is quite exciting, I've never seen this village of yours before." Itachi Uchiha hmmmed, "As I recall you never got to attend the Chunin Exams either. This will just be a trip full of firsts for you won't it Kisame?"
Kisame grinned, "Indeed it will!" "So I'm sure you'll forgive me for the mission parameters," Itachi smiled as he handed Kisame the paper and turned to the blue haired woman across the room, "Konan, we've received a mission. Would you like to come along?" Konan thought about it and then smiled, "I suppose I might. It's been ages since I've seen Jiraiya-sensei after all." Kisame was frowning at the paper Itachi had handed him, "I don't get it Itachi, what's so bad about this?"
Itachi fished a picture from inside his cloak and handed it to Kisame with a smirk, "Here's our cover." Kisame studied the picture for a moment and then, "Wait a minute…" Kisame's eyes widened, "NO! NO! NO! NONONONONO! I WON'T DO IT! YOU CAN'T MAKE ME!" Itachi grinned evilly at him, "Is that a challenge?" Kisame paled as Itachi's Sharingan flared to life. Konan smiled, "This is going to be fun."
==Two Days Later==
"So that's it huh?" Sasuke asked. Gaara nodded, "Welcome to Hidden Sand." "Looks like they were expecting us," Jiraiya observed as he noticed the clearly heightened security. "Actually," a voice declared from behind them, "I think that was our fault." They turned and saw a wiry man with shoulder length blonde hair, a black trench coat and a katana eyeing them with a hint of amusement in his almost glowing yellow eyes. "They tend to get a little skittish whenever I come to town," added the short hunchbacked man in the straw hat and black cloak with red clouds, "By the way boy, is that my Crow?"
Kankuro started to protest and then he realized what the man had said and his blood ran cold, "Sasori of the Red Sand?" Sasori grinned slightly, "The one and only."
AN: First of all, yes, the Akatsuki are moving on stage much earlier, and yes, as I said in the author note of Chapter 2, they are radically different from canon in many ways. We'll explore those ways as we go along.
Yes Kankuro may very well develop a crush on Sakura now that he knows about her incredible control he will certainly have a deep respect for her.
Yes Danzo and Hiruzen work together in this story, and yes Itachi and the Akatsuki were just hired by the Hidden Leaf. Sasori is still with the Akatsuki but he is currently on a job for the Lord of the Land of Wind, which is who Mimasu works for.
OMAKE: SASUKE'S GREAT ESCAPES: LOVE AND RAMEN
==A Week After Sasuke's First Encounter With The Fangirl Horde==
Sasuke was running again. Itachi hadn't been kidding when he said the terrible horde was relentless. He rushed down the street and suddenly a strong hand caught him by the back of the shirt and yanked him up and through the air. Sasuke was set in the shade and he heard the fangirls go stampeding past behind him on the other side of whatever small wall he was sitting behind. He looked up and saw an old man in white with a smile. The old man didn't look down and went on about his business, it looked like he was cooking something, but he said quietly, "stay down kid, they're not all gone yet."
"Thank you," Sasuke replied quietly, "Why are you helping me?" "You're not the first kid to hide from a mob at Ichiraku Ramen," the old man replied with a smile. Before Sasuke could ask what he meant, a little blonde girl bounced over the counter down to where Sasuke was hiding. Before Sasuke could cringe in horror, the little girl shot behind the curtain below the counter. Sasuke realized it was a good idea and slipped behind the curtain as well.
The little girl looked at him with nothing short of terror and scrambled back as much as she could in the confined space. Sasuke put his fingers to his lips and shushed her, noting as he did that even though she was terrified she was extremely pretty. Certainly better than any of those banshees chasing him he thought. The whisker marks were kind of cute too…and she wasn't chasing him, didn't even appear to be interested in him…maybe she could be for him what Anko-onee-chan was for Itachi?
Sasuke found himself blushing slightly and was very happy that it was dark under the counter. Why was she hiding? he wondered, Was there such a thing as fanboys? No, he thought, shaking his head, surely the world couldn't be that messed up…
About fifteen minutes later they heard yelling outside. The yelling quickly dissolved into the sounds of a very loud fight. The fight didn't last long and then three people sat down at the counter. "What troublesome people," said one, "Really, chasing a little kid like that. Where's the decency?" "They don't have any," said the second, "Hello sir, I understand that this is some of the best ramen in the village. I am very hungry after that little policing action and would love to try one of everything." The old man smiled, "Most certainly my good sir! One of everything, coming right up! Would you other two gentlemen like anything?"
"Miso for me," said the first. "Pork for me," said the third, "Oh hello sweetheart, how have you been?" "Daddyyy! Sasuke-kun disappeared again!" Sasuke froze in horror as he recognized the girl's voice. There was a little poof of chakra smoke next to him and Sasuke suddenly found himself looking at an exact duplicate of himself. The other Sasuke who had been the little girl gave him a thumbs up and whispered "good luck!" before shooting out the side of the ramen stand and a moment later the squeals and screams started again, quickly fading as Sasuke's mysterious savior of the day led them away.
The old man looked under the counter after a minute, "All clear kid." Sasuke poked his head out and thanked the old man politely. Then a voice said from behind him, "So you're the one my daughter won't quit going on about?" Sasuke looked over his shoulder and saw the three men who had been fighting and yelling before they sat down. The one that had spoken was blonde, the man next to him was huge and heavy set, and the third man had dark hair and scars.
"Who would've guessed Fugaku's kid would take so much after Mikoto?" said the big man. "Maybe that's why the girls like him," the scarred man said with a grin and the other two started laughing. Sasuke wasn't sure what they meant, but he was pretty sure they weren't laughing at him so he didn't say anything. Then the big one asked, "So if you're here, then who was that the girls ran off after? You're mighty young to know clone techniques."
The old man sighed as he served up another bowl of ramen, "That was the one you three just saved from his own personal mob." The three men's eyes widened and they leapt up in unison yelling, "Oh crap!" "What a drag…" The scarred man groaned. "We'll be right back!" the big man declared as he kept eating. "But if those girls catch him and find out they were tricked the kid's done for!" the blonde one added. They took off after the girls and the one that had transformed to look like Sasuke to lead them away.
Sasuke fished out some money and handed it to the old man, "Will that cover two bowls of ramen for that girl who was hiding with me?" The old man blinked and smiled, "Of course, I'll make it four since you two are having such a harrowing day. Naruto's actually a boy though. He's had to become very skilled at Transformation Jutsu." Sasuke was visibly stunned by the revelation and the old man laughed. As Sasuke left his mind was in turmoil, Does this mean all girls are crazy and the ones that aren't are boys using transformation?!
Then he looked around and saw the destruction the three men had left in their wake. There had to be thirty people flung all over the street, most of them unconscious, and one was even hanging upside down pinned to a wall by his clothes with shuriken! Note to self, he thought, never make Ino's dad angry…
A voice spoke from behind him, "So Sasuke, what happened here?" Sasuke spun and saw his dad and cousin Shisui standing there surveying the scene. Sasuke hugged his dad, now that he was here those stupid fangirls wouldn't dare mess with him! So Sasuke explained what had happened and finished with, "And then the old man said that one cool girl who got the crazy ones off my back was actually a boy, but I'm not sure I believe him. That would be like mistaking big brother for a girl." Shisui sniggered and suddenly Itachi popped out of a nearby dumpster, "Not one word Shisui!" Then every girl left on the street shrieked "ITACHIIIII!" "CRAP!" Itachi yelled and took off running as fast as he could.
Fugaku looked at Shisui, "I'm guessing that's happened?" Shisui nodded, still trying his very hardest not to laugh. Fugaku sighed and patted Sasuke on the head, "Son, never grow long hair. I tried to warn your brother and he didn't listen." Sasuke nodded, "Ok."
AN: Yes, this incident is the source of Sasuke's sexual tension with Naruto. He never was able to not see Naruto as the beautiful girl that saved him from the crazies. It didn't become belligerent sexual tension until after he met Naruto's male form. He would've accepted Naruto's antics if Naruto had been in female form and probably have gone out with Naruto at least a few times. This has not happened because Naruto constantly uses what Sasuke sees as a very annoying disguise.
