Disclaimer: Not mine, still.

A/N: I don't know what's going on, but for some reason I can't upload anything so I'm working by copy/pasting. Hopefully it isn't total crap and I'm not missing bits. Anyhoo. I stole little bits or concepts for some conversation pieces later in this bit, but mostly it's all reworked. More to come, dears. Thanks to the two new followers and please, please, please review!


It would be another few days before we would reach Redcliffe, a few more days of travel with my new companions. Usually Aedan or Alistair led, sometimes both as they would chat, because both of them knew the way better than anyone else. I think Leliana might have known where she was going, if we gave her the opportunity but Morrigan had no experience much outside of the Wilds and Sten was nearly as foreign as I was. On one afternoon in particular, Aedan and Alistair walked side-by-side in the front, discussing something I couldn't hear from the back of the line. Behind them walked Sten, looking particularly disgruntled I imagine. He and Morrigan and been speaking and they had the oddest exchanges. Sten held a culture-based disapproval of magic, although they agreed on many other things. It appeared that the conversation had veered towards magic because Morrigan had scoffed and held herself to avoid a continued interaction.

Leliana came up beside me and simply smiled for a long moment before she spoke in her lilting, French-sounding accent. "I have noticed that you seem rather attached to your bow."

"If by that you mean I can't use anything else, you've noticed correctly," I laughed a little, turning to look at her though glancing in front of me to make sure that I didn't run into anyone or anything.

Mather dodged around us, moving beside me before running ahead to beg for attention from our other companions, making the rounds every hundred feet or so unless someone stopped to pay attention to him.

Leliana smiled at me still, trying to assuage my embarrassment. "I did not mean to offend you, I merely meant to suggest... If you would be interested, I would be able to help teach you. I could help you with your form a little, and teach you how to utilize daggers for close combat."

"I would love that. And I'm pretty certain everyone else would too. I can't imagine me actually hitting something other than the ground would be frowned upon." We both laughed, although her laugh sounded far more refined. Almost practiced, but not quite. I sounded like a seal, or something. You know that kind of laugh that's just natural, but not necessarily lilting and lovely? Just a laugh, unrefined and unimportant. Leliana, everything about her, was honed. She and Morrigan were alike in that way; they were both deadly beauties with sculpted bodies and perfect skin. They were the kind of women that I would've envied until I turned green back home. Well, I did envy them that much.

We continued on, making small-talk about ourselves – I tried very hard to keep the focus of the conversation on Leliana, as I still hadn't taken enough time to create a viable backstory. I didn't know enough about the land around me to create a place I could have been from. The day was long and we traveled as far as we could while the sunlight remained and, after dinner was caught, cooked, and taken care of Leliana and I separated ourselves a little from the group. We were still within sight of the others as we set ourselves up in front of a tree. Leliana took a dagger and dug out an 'x' on the side of the tree before she holstered it at her side and came to stand a few feet behind me.

"Come back here a little. I will have you shoot and watch and then help you correct your form."

I did as I was told, knocking an arrow and loosing it against the tree. My arrow flew wide, landing half-heartedly in a tree a few feet behind the other.

"Oh, I see," Leliana murmured, to herself mostly, and moved around to stand at my side. She did not question my left-handed use of the bow and arrow, merely adjusted herself so that she could appropriately help me. She pressed her front to my back and slide her arms along mine, her cheek almost pressed to mine. It was odd for me; I hadn't really been this close to another woman, regardless of the intent, in a long time. I had few female friends and no contact with my mother, so no reason for hugs or anything like them. But the proximity was nice. It was even a little comforting, having someone close. Like being near Aedan while he slept, or having Alistair with me on my bedroll. I felt alone, but less so. It wasn't the aching, terrifying sort of loneliness when someone was close to me.

Leliana and I spent quite a long while trying for me to hit the target. She wouldn't let me stop until I got three in a row, at which point she suggested that I try again. It seemed the practice had helped quite a bit, although I knew in the heat of battle it wouldn't be quite as easy. She suggested, too, that we try to continue our practice nightly if possible. She promised the next day we would work on daggers, though.

She was pleasant; a little strange, insomuch that I always felt like she was saying half-truths even when she was speaking about the weather. It was an odd sort of realization, but it didn't matter; she was kind and she was helping me. She preferred daggers in combat, but she still knew her way around a bow and arrow, that was for sure. And when she had me sparring with her, teaching me form with a dagger and the best way to avoid getting hit while still making some kind of attack, I knew she could not have been a cloistered sister for all of her life. We had not gotten that far into our discussions, but I knew that there was a story behind those gray-blue eyes.


On what Alistair and Aedan both agreed would likely be our last night before reaching the town of Redcliffe, after a particularly rigorous training session with Leliana, I practically threw myself into the river.

I hadn't brushed my teeth, not properly, in weeks. I had given up on deodorant and had slowly grown accustomed to leaves. My hair was almost constantly in knots but I was becoming more okay with looking less put together, not that I had ever been particularly high-maintenance.

I went in fully clothed, my armor long-since discarded, and slowly removed my clothes to wash them as well as myself. I was down to my smallclothes – that's what they called them, anyway – with my clothes draped over low hanging branches of a tree. I scrubbed what skin was bare, my body too bruised and tired to try and get anything else off right away.

And it was, apparently, a good idea. I heard some bumbling footsteps and then a loud announcement of Alistair's present.

"Gwen? I have my eyes covered but-"

"Don't be ridiculous, you'll trip and kill yourself," I laughed, practically sitting in the water. "I'm submerged. You won't see anything, don't worry."

Alistair pulled his hand away from his eyes but I imagined that his cheeks were red. It was dark, though the moon was incredibly full and stars glittered everywhere. Even though the camp was quite a bit away and the fire was low, I could see him pretty well, although his face was still mostly shadowed. He stepped awkwardly around rocks, finding one large enough to sit on.

"This is not a good time, is it?"

"Honestly, Alistair, it's fine. Obviously you wanted to talk to me alone, and this is probably the best we're going to get. It isn't like there is a lot free time."

"I just...I don't know. This isn't exactly how I wanted to tell you."

"Then... turn around for a minute. I'll get out and get dressed. We can stay down here for a while and you can tell me whatever it is you want to tell me."

After a moment he nodded and agreed, standing up to face in the other direction as I stripped my bra band and underwear off to change it for the clean ones, dressing in the loose tunic and tight breeches I had laid out earlier. As I squeezed my hair out, I let him know I was ready.

He turned around as I moved about, straightening everything on the branch before moving over to him. He watched me silently until I came to stand close to him.

"It's about...it's about Redcliffe, sort of. I thought you should know before we got there. I...I lived there. When I was younger."

I nodded, unsure of what to say. He sighed a little but continued, "I...Arl Eammon raised me, sort of. For a while."

"Alistair," I started, reaching out and touching his fabric-covered arm. "You don't have to tell me anything you don't want to."

"But I do," he groaned a little, lifting his hand to rub it over his face. "I want you to know, I've just never told anyone before. Anyone that knew was told already. It...when people found out, it always made things harder."

"Alistair, I promise you," I smiled and touched his cheek, not sure if I should but choosing to do it anyway, "nothing could make this harder."

He laughed and his hand took mine for a moment before they dropped to our sides. "I guess that's true. But...Gwen, I'm King Maric's son."

Now, I imagine this would have meant a lot more if I knew who the hell King Maric was. I could guess, though, that meant that he was illegitimate.

"And he left you with the Arl because he couldn't have you at the castle," I spoke, mostly to let him know I was following. "That's why it's so important to you that we go to Redcliffe."

"He might have sent me to the Chantry, but...he still did good things for me. And if he is sick and we can do anything, I feel like...like I owe him."

"It's all right, Alistair," I found his hand again, "We will do everything we can for him. Even if it's just you and I."

"It doesn't...it doesn't matter to you that I am a royal bastard?" He asked with a small, sideways smile and a sad sort of distance in his eyes.

"Why would it matter? You're the same person now that you were before you told me. Nothing has changed."

"That...that isn't true," he breathed, his hand that wasn't in mine lifting and pushing a string of wet hair away from my face. "Gwen...I have something for you."

"A present?" I grinned at him, my unused hand coming up to rest flat against his chest. It was warm beneath his shirt and hard, the muscles taught. I had never met men like my companions, so incredibly physically refined. It was like something out of a movie. Not that I was complaining.

Alistair disconnected from me and reached into his pouch, withdrawing a brilliant rose. "I...I tried to convince Morrigan to cast a preservation spell, but she wouldn't even listen to me. Aedan got her to do it, though. I found it in Lothering. I saw it and I just... I couldn't stop thinking about how it was perfect. Something so beautiful, thriving in a place so full of despair and ugliness. I probably should have left it there, you know. But I couldn't just let it be taken over by the darkspawn, I knew their Taint would just destroy it. I...I wanted to give it to you, actually. I've been thinking about it for a while."

I felt the heat in my cheeks and my skin tingled a little; it was like the butterflies on a first date. I took the rose gently in my hands, holding it in front of me to look at it. "It is absolutely beautiful, Alistair. I really...thank you."

And I did what I would have done anywhere else. I went up on tip-toe and pressed a kiss to his cheek. I knew, without a doubt, that his cheeks were flaming red like mine were.

"I...I should be thanking you," he responded, his deep voice a little breathy. We had moved closer, somehow, and I had my head tilted back to look up at him. He wasn't touch me but I could feel his closeness just the same. "I wanted to give it to you because...well, because, in a lot of ways, I feel the same way about you. Everything I said about how you hold us together...it's not just us as a group. I don't know what I would do, if you weren't here with me."

I didn't know what to say to him; it was the sweetest thing I had ever remembered someone saying to me. It didn't matter if it was a dream or impossible, it was still incredibly sweet. We spent a lot of time together; all of us did, really. I tended to walk with Alistair and Aedan when I could. Sometimes Aedan would opt to speak to Morrigan, Sten, or Leliana instead. I tried to speak to the others also, because...well, it seemed important. But I found myself gravitating towards Alistair more often than not. We spoke of a lot of things, mostly just to pass the time. But I liked it. A lot.

"But I am, Alistair," I smiled at him and slid my fingers through his, squeezing his hand gently. "And I feel very much the same way. You make this easier."

"You make it look pretty easy," he chuckled, his eyes still locked with mine.

"It's my natural charm and elegance," I laughed, slipping my hand from his and tucking my rose behind my ear. Alistair halted me, adjusting the rose before his hand cupped my cheek.

"Seriously, Gwen. I hope... I hope this wasn't too forward, or anything. But to know you accept me...even after I lied to you. I couldn't help myself."

I turned my head a little, kissing his palm as I lifted my hand to cover his. "No, Alistair. It wasn't too forward. It's all right. It was lovely. Thank you."

It was a long moment that we stood there, not saying anything with his hand on my cheek and our bodies so close that they were exchanging heat. We didn't kiss and we didn't close the gap, just stood there and appreciated that we truly weren't alone.