Chapter 9 – What are friends for?

Hermione tumbled out of the floo, choking back her sobs. Harry stood completely still as she dried off her face and tried to compose herself. Hermione could not stand that about her best friend. She hated it. No one could stand still like Harry, not a single person. The only movement that was detectible was the slight, almost imperceptible movement of his chest. The slow rise and fall of his breaths. Not a hair on his head moved, not a muscle twitched. Nothing. It was like he was a breathing statue.

"Move! For gods sake Harry, you know I hate when you-

"Shut. Up." Harry whispered. It was then Hermione took in his face, the utter determination on it. And the disappointment. Harry found out. Oh dear he's found out!

"Harry, don't-

He glared at her, but didn't repeat himself. Hermione sank into the sofa and closed her eyes. They were stinging with pain and she hoped there weren't any outwards signs of it. She'd never hear the end of it. All anyone had to say to her was 'how are you doing' and 'do you feel better'. It was getting on her last nerve.

"I introduced you to Draco Malfoy, because you came to me and you said you were interested in him. That you liked him and maybe you could settle down. I would have had you committed if I didn't know Malfoy was a good guy. Do you realize what you've done? Do you? I thought you cared about him! But all you care about is becoming a mum before you die! What about after? Who is going to look after your daughter? Me? Do you want me to do it for you, because you're taking the easy way out? How dare you!" Harry was still completely still, only moved his mouth, eyes, and his chest as he breathed heavily.

"You don't understand Harry. I didn't think I was going to die, and I'm not going to." Hermione didn't know if that was entirely true. If Draco's father was to be trusted, then she was going to be deprived of every sense she had. She wouldn't be able to feel Draco touch her, or hold her daughter or son her arms and feel the warmth. She wouldn't smell that baby smell. If they got sick she wouldn't be able to tell. She couldn't tell her child she loved them. They wouldn't be able to tell her.

"What the fuck are you talking about!" Harry suddenly blurted out in rage. He broke out of his trance and his whole body twitched into motion. She absolutely hated that about Harry. It was right. She blamed those stupid muggles for scarring him when he was a little boy and throughout his teenage years. It was their fault.

"Dolohov was the death eater that cursed me. Lucius Malfoy recognized the symptoms I've been having as the curse Dolohov was researching before he died. It isn't going to kill me Harry, at least not according to Lucius." Hermione breathed as fast as she could. She was really tired of being yelled at today. She was just so tired.

"What is it doing then?" Harry demanded, sinking down onto the sofa with her. Hermione took his hand.

"Two weeks ago I opened my eyes and smiled. I heard the birds chirping and saw the sun shining in my room. I reached for my wand to clean my teeth because I wasn't ready to get out of bed. The moment I touched it I felt nothing. I saw myself touching the wand, but I couldn't feel it in my hands. Theirs nothing like holding your wand, feeling it's magic pulsing. You know that. But I couldn't feel it and then I realized I couldn't feel anything at all. I couldn't feel the warmth from my blanket or the heat from the sun. I panicked. Now I know how dumb it was, but I tried to cast a spell. I couldn't of course because you have to feel the magic to be able to connect to it."

Harry was slowly turning pale, but Hermione kept going with her story. He wanted to know the truth and she was really tired of hiding and keeping things from him, from everyone.

"It was the most terrifying feeling, Harry, walking through my flat to the kitchen. I was barefoot, but couldn't feel the cold floor touching my feet. I reached for my kitchen knives and….I drew It across my forearm. You see, I just had to know!" Hermione rolled up her sleeve and pointed out the faded pink scar marring her skin.

"I couldn't feel the pain, Harry. It was so scary. But then about two minutes after that the feelings came back and I could feel that I was cold and my arm was burning and stinging. My hair was tickling my neck and I had an eyelash in my eye. I couldn't feel any of that for about thirteen minutes."

They sat in silence for a long time until Harry reached for her and pulled her into a bone crushing hug. Hermione hugged him back, taking all the comfort she could get.

"I don't want to let this happen, but I don't know how to stop it Harry. I wish I could. Do you think I don't want to see my daughter's face when she's born or feel the kisses of my husband? I don't want this, I really don't."

Harry rubbed her back comfortingly, "I know, Mione, I know. I'm so sorry. So sorry." Harry whispered and pressed a kiss to her hair.

"I'm going to be here with you every step of the way, and so will Draco. I'm sure of it."

She nodded silently, her eyes drooping. "I'm so tired Harry. I'm always so tired. How can I live if I'm sleeping all the time? What kind of life is that?" She mumbled into his shoulder.

"Just go to sleep, Mione. I'll take you back to Draco's and you can sleep."

Hermione let out a monstrous yawn. "Mmkay…"

She drifted into sleep after just three hours of being awake.


Harry carried a sleeping Hermione in his arms out to the apparation point. He thought she would be fine to apparate with since she hadn't mentioned it. A pull around his navel and a slight catch and his breath, then he was standing outside Malfoy Manor. Hermione didn't stir. It was unnerving how completely asleep she was. Worrying. Harry didn't know what he was going to do with her. How could he help her with this? What could he possibly do?

Dolohov was already dead, so he couldn't torture any answers out of him. Harry walked through the wards and called for Malfoy. Hermione wouldn't wake.

"Oh…there she is. Her bedroom is next to mine down the hall, last door." Harry led the way, choosing not to comment on how they didn't share a room.

Maybe Mione was doing it the old-fashioned way and waiting till they were actually married to share a room. Harry laid her on the bed and covered her with the duvet after removing her shoes.

"Is she alright? I just woke her up about three hours ago, you know." Malfoy said, worrying in his tone.

Harry nodded, "She's fine. We had little fight, but it's fine. I'm just so scared for her. I'm not used to not knowing how to save someone. It was always a natural talent in the past."

"Very modest, Potter." Malfoy said sarcastically, but without any real bite. Harry chuckled and turned around to follow Malfoy out of the room.

"We need to keep a close eye on her. I'm not going to let her waste away when she has a whole life ahead of her. With you it seems.

"I'm not so sure. I think I reverted to the prat I was before. She didn't like it at all. We've not really fought, you know. Get along great, actually. Until recently, with all the bloody secrets."

"I know what you mean. I don't think you should post pone the wedding though. As much as I can't stand it, she might actually lose some of her senses before this is over. I know she would want them all for her wedding day."

Malfoy nodded and ran his hands through his hair agitatedly. "It's all so fucking helpless!" He exclaimed desperately.

"I know exactly what you're saying. We'll figure it out though. We will."

Malfoy looked over at him, "Do you think my father deserves to be released early?"

Harry choked a little inside, completely unprepared for that question.

"What do you mean?"

Malfoy rubbed his fingers over his eyes, "Do you think he should be let out early? Does he not deserves what's happening to him now in Azkaban?"

Harry clenched his fists nervously, "No one deserves that. Your father was the worst of the death eaters, you know that. I think he's paid enough and should be released. He's been through enough."

Malfoy let out a breath, "Good. I thought so too, but I thought maybe I was going insane. My father and I were never the best of friends."

Harry nodded in understanding, "I think that's probably the same with a lot of father's and son's. I'll see you both tomorrow. I think we all need to talk together."

Malfoy swallowed thickly, "Yeah, sure. See you tomorrow." He rushed out of the room and Harry heard him pause at Hermione's door before heading back to his.

He hoped they worked everything out before Hermione was out of time.


A/N: Updated a lot sooner than usual. I hope you guys like the chapter. It's mostly a filler though. There was a little language in this chapter, let me know if it seemed out of place, like something they wouldn't have really said. Thanks!- Mayajane