9. Scenes from a Mall
I-23 watched the night traffic from his usual favorite position, an access lane between the eastbound and westbound threads of the interstate. Motorists missed the cruiser until it was too late, allowing him to keep up with his objectives.
The radar gun beeped; bringing him back from his thoughts. People flew over the hill all the time, right into his sights and a ticket. Someone was barreling into reckless driving territory. When the gun flashed 110 he looked up, and saw nothing.
Drakken wanted to look at the map, but Shego was on edge, even by her own short fused standards. Conceding that she must know the way, he decided on something else. "We're almost there, now, what's the plan?"
Shego kept her eyes straight ahead. "We're stopping at the Go City Store and Save."
"Are we meeting the Mother Superior there?"
"We aren't meeting Mother Superior anywhere. We need a quarter million to save St. Ag's and we've got four and a half. Our 'share' needs a home."
"And you're going to rent a unit for it?"
"I'm not, 'Constance Cabot' is." Shego glanced over. "I've had a unit there under that name for a while. I keep some things there."
I wondered about that. You've never really had anything in your rooms in any lair. "And just who is 'Constance Cabot'?"
"An alter ego; upright citizen, proper, someone Mom would be proud of." Drakken could not miss the self reproach in Shego's voice.
"She sounds dreadfully boring to me. Give me a girl with…"
"What?" Shego's lip curled in amusement. "Mutants?"
"Now let's not bring DNAmy up again!" Drakken shuddered. "What was I thinking?"
"Maybe I could fill that in for you: a nice little house, the smell of cookies in the oven. The pitter-patter of little webbed feet…"
"That's enough, Shego!" He bit his tongue before he said anything he would regret.
"But you liked her." She teased. "They say there's someone for everyone." The smile faded. "Don't know if I believe that. When have I ever had a steady?"
"Steady? Oh, you mean a boyfriend." Drakken "How could somebody like you not have to fight them off?"
"I had to fight them off, all right; learned all my in-fighting in the back seat of cars. That Larry Smearer! Once you get a reputation…" Shego's eyes burned. "There was this one boy, Tommy Pearson, he was nice. He even took me to meet his mom. I could hear them in the other room. She was telling him, quietly, nicely, that I was not the kind of girl she wanted her son to be seen with. If he wanted to see me and make out from time to time, well, she understood that. 'Boys will be boys'. But I wasn't girlfriend material."
"My Mother approves of you." Drakken blurted out before he thought. He could remember Shego making the motion of sticking her finger down her throat at Mother Lipski's not-so-subtle suggestion that he settle down with the girl in green and black.
"Your mom still thinks that Ed corrupted you. She might not be the best judge of character."
"Don't…" Drakken stopped at Shego's glare. "Don't you think it's time we stopped for some rest?"
"Good idea, Doc." Shego pulled into a hotel parking lot. "Wait here, I'll get us a room."
The room was around back, so they could hide the DoomVee 3 from the road. Drakken stared at the single room key.
"Just one room?"
"We might need to make a quick get-away. You can't do that with multiple rooms. Don't worry, Doc, it's got twin beds." It was a small, comfortable room. Shego took the bed nearest the wall. She went into the bathroom with a bag, and came out in a few minutes in green pajamas.
"It's a while before the Store and Save opens." Shego set the alarm beside the bed. "We'll have time for some sleep and breakfast." She settled into her bed and turned out her light.
Drakken lay on his bed for a while, staring at the ceiling. A plan began to form, his most ambitious ever. Also his most dangerous, but anything really worth it involves some risk.
GBB!
Harvey was unlocking the doors of Bordertown Motors when a charcoal sedan pulled in. Two men, one defining all-American, the other clearly of South Asian extraction, stepped out of the car and walked over to him.
"Welcome, sirs, to Bordertown Motors, what can I do you for?"
"I'm Special Agent N. Trusive, this is Special Agent Un Warn Ated. We're looking for Dr. Drakken and Shego. They escaped prison a few days ago. When last seen they were traveling with a band called 'the Forces of Evil.' Have you seen these people or this vehicle?"
The car dealer looked over the pictures handed to him. "These two don't look familiar. As to the van, I see a lot of vehicles every day, part of my business."
"Reports had this van sighted near here." Un Warn Ated joined the conversation.
"Sirs, I can say with complete honesty that this particular vehicle is not on my lot." A loud crash and crunching sounds came from somewhere behind them.
"What was that?" N. Trusive asked sharply.
"Car being demolished." Harvey shrugged. "You know, recycle, renew, reuse, don't you have kids in school?" He gave N. Trusive a look. "Nah, come to think of it, that would involve too many unorthodox procedures for you."
The agent chose to ignore the verbal jab. "Here's our card. If you see or hear anything, be sure to let us know."
"I'll do that." Harvey nodded. The Agency men drove away, and his face wrinkled in contempt. "When pigs fly." He walked over to the sign. These are the guys protecting us? Sheesh! Removing the last of its covering, he admired the fine lettering.
Bordertown Motors: A Consala Family Enterprise
GBB!
Kim and Ron were at the Possible breakfast table when the Kimmunicator rang.
"Go, Wade."
"Kim, you've got a call from Special Agent Bullman. He suspects Drakken and Shego will be in Go City today! He wants you two to set up on Interstate 57. He seems to think they'll come from that direction."
"We're on it!" They started to stand up, when her parents came to the doorway.
"Where are you going, Kim?" Mr. Dr. Possible asked.
"Drakken and Shego are on their way to Go City. We've been asked by the Agency to help stop them."
"But, Kimmie, it's a school day." Mrs. Dr. Possible objected.
"But we don't have classes." Ron jumped in. "It's Senior Help Day; we were on our way to help clean up along Lake Middleton." Both Kim and Ron were wearing old clothes.
"I'd hate to see you miss that, Kimmicub." Her father said.
"Dad, saving the world's helping. Besides, I'm sure Bonnie won't mind running things in my absence."
"Just be back in time for supper." Her mother sighed. "Will you be getting a ride?"
"No, we'll take the Sloth. We may need to join a pursuit."
"I guess Ron Reiger can drop Jim and Tim off after school. He picked them up this morning, said something about a big plan." Mr. Dr. Possible was resigned to his daughter going on a mission. "We'll contact the school."
"Thanks, Mom, Dad." Kim kissed them both. After they left, she turned to Ron.
"If you'll give me a minute, I'll go get my things. I also want to change. You've got to see what I used my employee discount on at Club Banana last night."
"You mean, you aren't wearing you mission togs?" Ron asked. Rufus also looked confused.
"I'll carry those with me. Right now, I want to just look like a teen. It's a disguise thing." She smiled, and the smile made the blood pound in Ron's ears. "It's also a girl friend thing."
GBB!
Bullman was not the only person making additional security arrangements. The monitor at Team Go's tower turned on. Hego and Mego hurriedly moved their cereal bowls off the table.
"Team Go, we have a problem." Joe Grafton's face filled the screen. "Dr. Drakken and his side kick Shego will be entering town any time! They must be stopped!"
"You can count on us, sir." Hego said in his best heroic voice, impressive despite the milk moustache. "Any idea where they may be coming from?"
"Rumor says Interstate 57. It's vital that you keep them out of town. The welfare of some very important people depends on you. You can also contact Captain Hendricks of the Police Department for additional information. Good luck, Team Go!"
"Well, that's it." Hego shook his head sadly. "It's finally come, a show down with Sis! We're superheroes, not some Greek dramatic guys."
The twins stepped in at the end of the conversation. They split into a dozen at Hego's last words.
"Terrible!" One gasped. "Family conflict!"
"Tragic!" wailed another. "The shade of Antigone weeps!"
Others added their comments. Hego walked away and Mego looked at them and shrugged. "I could've told you…right over his head."
GBB!
"Okay, we're here." Shego looked over at Drakken. She wore a severe black dress and glasses. Her hair was straight and in a pony tail. He barely recognized her. "You can wait out here…"
"Uh, actually, since there's a mall right here, would you mind if I went in and got something…for Mother. There's a gift she's been dying for these past few years, and I think I might be able to find it here."
"Sure." She shrugged. Rather do this by myself anyway, don't think he'd understand. "I'll just find you when I'm done."
Drakken hurried across the parking lot to the mall. Shego got out of the DoomVee 3 and stepped inside the large storage complex. She went straight to the office.
The man at the desk straightened up at the sight of her. "Mrs. Cabot, it's been a while. Are you here to…"
"Actually, I require an additional unit; something suitable for short term storage."
"Of course." The man brightened up. "I have something on the back side of the building. It is outside. Will that be a problem?"
"No." Mrs. Cabot shook her head. "Outside will be just fine in this case."
"Excellent. I'll just type in the information here and get you a lock and key." In a few minutes she was signing a printout and giving the man his money, along with a set of instructions. He listened very carefully to the Store and Save's most exacting customer.
"Can I trust you to follow these instructions to the letter?"
"Yes, ma'am. No questions, asked." He handed her the keys. "I'll have some men there to help you."
"That will not be necessary, thank you."
"While you're here, would you like to take inventory of your lot? I assure you it's all in order."
Shego gazed longingly down the hall. "No, I haven't the time today." she sighed. "Thank you."
She took the locks and went out to the DoomVee 3. When she got out, she noticed one of the suit cases was slightly lighter. A quick examination revealed some money was missing. The realization brought a smile to her face.
"Still with the larceny, Dr. D. I like it!" For a moment she wondered what he needed a rather nice stack of Ben Franklins for. I'm sure Momma Lipski will like it.
It was still early in the shopping day. The mall had some customers, and a lot of seniors doing their exercises. Shego sat among some plants in the back of a dining area, sipping on a coffee. Once again she wore the suit, hat and shades. She drew deeper into her shadows when she heard a pair of familiar voices.
"Bullman said it may be a little while before they make their move, so why not do a little shopping first?" Kim's voice was bright and chipper, making Shego's teeth grind against each other. "After all, the Go City Mall was voted most teen friendly for the past two years in a row!"
"The Ron Man is all about the bargains." Boy, he sounds even more mindless than usual. They came into view, and Shego understood why.
Ron was in his usual hockey shirt and cargo pants. Kim wore a blue blouse, and a short skirt. It was charcoal, smooth and clingy in a way Shego had never seen her nemesis dress before. Our little girl's growing up. Ron could barely take his eyes off of the red head beside him, even when a concrete pillar jumped out in front of him. Kim pulled him over just in time.
"Watch you step." She laughed.
"Yeah, watch." He said in a daze. Rufus stuck his head out of a pocket and shook it in an air of resignation.
"Maybe I should just go and put on my mission clothes?" Kim teased.
"Mission? Oh, no, mission!" Ron looked panicked until Kim put a hand to his face.
"You're right, there'll be time for that later. Right now, we're just BF and GF. Come on, Ron, let's Mall Crawl!"
They walked past, and were soon under a walk way on the next floor. It looked weak. They were stopped under it, talking and standing ridiculously close. Ron had a hand resting on Kim's hip. She was making a joke of holding it in place. Shego was not sure if Ron was trying to let the hand slip down 'accidentally' or if Kim was behind its arrested drift. Shego's hands trembled. One good blast on that overhang and she'd have what she wanted, more than anything. She started to move her hands into position to form the plasma ball when her targets moved on, hand in hand.
Nah, that would've been too easy. Stupid kids! They're supposed to be on a mission, they're nothing but…
In the past few days with her old friends, singing had become as natural as talking to Shego. Music came to her. Kim and Ron walked down the mall, never bothering to look up to see the dark haired woman in a black suit who had taken an elevator and now followed them, watching from above and singing softly to herself.
Fools in love, are there any other type of lovers?
Fools in love, is there any other kind of pain?
Everything you do, everywhere you go now
Everything you touch, everything you feel
Everything you see, everything you know now
Everything you do, you do it for your lady
Love, your lady love, your lady
Love, your lady love
The teen heroes visited the shops, Kim tried things on. Ron and Rufus entertained her. The mall filled with people but they never noticed. They could scarcely look past each other's eyes.
Fools in love, are there any creatures more pathetic?
Fools in love, never knowing when they've lost the game?
Everything you do, everywhere you go now
Everything you touch, everything you feel
Everything you see, everything you know now
Everything you do, you do it for your lady
Love, your lady love, your lady
Love, your lady love
You idiots! She mentally screamed at them. The famous sneer was on her face as she leaned on the railing looking at them with their ice creams. Wasting your time! It doesn't mean anything! It's just hormones!
Fools in love they think they're heroes,
Cause they get to feel more pain
I say fools in love are zeroes
I should know, I should know
Because this fool's in love again
She shook her head in anger at the lyrics and stalked on. Shego never noticed Drakken hurriedly pulling back into a store and putting a bag behind his back. He waited until she was long gone before he started down the other direction, intending to run into her later.
Kim and Ron were at a table now. They had their cones in one hand, while their other hands were locked together on the table. Rufus sat on the table with some ice cream of his own and smiled at the lovers. Shego frowned from above.
Fools in love, gently hold each other's hands forever
Fools in love, gently tear each other limb from limb
Everything you do, everywhere you go now
Everything you touch, everything you feel
Everything you do, even your rock and roll now
Nothing mean a thing except you and your lady
Love your lady, love your lady
Love, your lady love
Her rage washed over her. The great Kim Possible, her rival, her only worthy foe, all atwitter over the buffoon! It was so ridiculous, so, so…
Fools in love they think they're heroes
Cause they get to feel more pain
I SAY FOOLS IN LOVE ARE ZEROES
I should know…
Shego had lost track of her quarry. They were nearing the top of the escalator. Shego barely had time to jump behind a column before they stepped off. Kim and Ron walked down the floor, hand in hand. They never saw the pale beauty slide around the column. She rested against the concrete, fingering her tie. A smile finally beat out the sneer.
I should know because this fool's in love again.
Fools in Love…by Joe Jackson, released by A&M Records
