Smells Like Teen Spirit

Smells Like Teen Spirit

Summary: One thing changes on the path back home for Xander. Begins at the Zeppo episode.

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"We're late," Xander said as he and Faith walked through the cemetery.

"No big, B can handle it," Faith said, and she pointed to a crypt, "I think that's it."

"Door's open," Xander said quietly, looking at the ground.

"Think B's in there," Faith asked.

"If she is, she brought friends," Xander said, still staring at the ground.

They both looked up as they heard the crypt doors creak open, and they got down and hid behind a statue.

"I can take 'em," Faith whispered to him.

"Priorities," Xander exclaimed, "We're outnumbered, and we need to find out if they got Buffy."

Faith growled quietly, but nodded all the same. As soon as they moved past them, the two sprinted for the crypt, finding it deserted. The two searched around for a moment, with Faith noticing the opened tomb. She looked inside.

"No amulet," Faith said.

"Let's check this one," Xander indicated the other one, "I need Slayer strength for this."

"Wussy," Faith mocked him, earning a finger from Xander, "You promise?"

"Faith," Xander groaned as he tried to push the slab off.

"Oh, alright," Faith said, and she easily pushed it off.

As she did so, a foot leapt out of the crypt, striking Xander in the head and sending him down to the ground. Faith reacted and made to punch the person inside, but she caught a glimpse of who it was before she did so.

"B," Faith asked.

"Faith," Buffy gasped as she stood up from the crypt, "Thank God, it's you…and Xander!"

Xander moaned on the floor as Buffy came beside him, with Faith not a step behind.

"Are you ok," Buffy asked as Xander tried to sit up.

"I think so," Xander said, sounding more like 'I dink tho.'

"Man, your nose is bleedin' bad," Faith said, and she gently fingered it, earning a loud cry of pain from him, "Feels like it might be broken."

"What were you even doing here, Xander," Buffy asked, "Didn't we talk about fray adjacent?"

"B, get over it," Faith advised, lifting Xander up, "C'mon, let's get you to the library."

"No, no," Xander objected, "I'b dine, bet's ust go ge dat abulet."

"Xander, no, you need to get back to the library," Buffy said, "Faith, take him, I'll go get the amulet."

"No way, B," Faith objected, "You ain't goin' after six vamps armed with swords, no chance in Hell. Either we all take Xander back, or we all stay, one of the two."

"Doe, det's kit arcuin dand go ge dose sons of itches," Xander said.

"…Alright," Buffy groaned, "But, you stay back."

The three quickly left the crypt, finding no sign of the vamps.

"Where'd they go," Buffy asked.

"Dere," Xander said, pointing to the open manhole cover.

"Alright, Xander, you stay topside," Buffy said as they headed over to it.

"B's right," Faith said before he could object, "Those vamps will smell the blood on you before we can get the drop on them."

"I ot an dea," Xander said, pulling out a gun, "'Aire un!"

"What," Buffy asked.

"Flair gun," Faith said, getting it, "We draw them out, he blinds 'em, and we pick 'em off."

"…I like it," Buffy said, "We're goin' in."

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Greg woke up with a pounding headache, like he had spent the night drinkin'. He groaned out and tried to reach up and massage his head, but he found that his hands were bound. Groaning, he opened his eyes.

"…The Hell is this," Greg demanded, looking up at Jack, Kyle, and Heidi as they smiled down on him.

"Your initiation, bro," Jack said with a grin.

"The fuck's wrong wit you," Greg snarled out, "Let me outta these things."

"Oh, poor baby," Heidi whispered as Kyle came behind him to untie him, "You want out?"

Before Kyle finished, Heidi reached out and stroked his face. Greg didn't know what the Hell was going on, but he knew enough to know that this girl was seriously fucked up. As she went from one side of his face to the other, she backed away, then almost casually backhanded him, sending him to one side as he felt one of his teeth loosen.

"Bitch," Greg spat blood at her.

"You want me," Kyle and Jack backed away as Heidi extended her hands, inviting him, "Come get me!"

Greg was up in an instant, running for Heidi with the intent of making that bitch pay. Suddenly, he stopped. He felt…odd…

His last thought before IT invaded him was that he would tear this bitch apart.

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Jack watched dispassionately as Heidi continued to break his friend. He ordinarily wasn't in the business of killing his friends in this manner, but Harris had pissed him off, and he had killed his friends in ways that made sure they weren't coming back.

"He's ready," Heidi said as she and Kyle flipped the broken Greg onto his back.

"Right," Jack said and he walked forward, kneeling down beside his friend, and casually slipped his knife into his heart.

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"Hold still," Faith said as she continued to pack the gauze into Xander's nose, "Jesus, you're a whiney bitch, aren't you?"

"Duck bu, Baith," Xander said, holding the ice up to his head as he did so.

"You couldn't even if you wanted to, boytoy," at his look, she clarified, "You'd pass out from blood loss."

"…Duck bu," he repeated, leaning back in his seat as he did so.

He and Faith were at the Bronze. After disposing of all but one vamp, he and Faith had came here to get some medical attention for his nose and face while Buffy tracked the last vamp. Xander at the moment had the amulet in his jacket, but they were hoping Buffy could track this last vamp back to their hideout so they could finish them off.

"That was a good trick with the flair gun," Faith complimented him, "You took out a vamp with it."

"Blah," Xander said.

"What," Faith asked.

"Blah," Xander said, "Beberdind."

"Oh, my God, Xander," Faith was almost pushed to the side as a redheaded hurricane came over, "What happened? Were you out fighting? See, this is why we told you not to go out on patrols, you'll get hurt, then killed, then…well, there's really nothing after that, but you get my point."

Xander would've tensed up at Willow's presence, but at that moment, he was too tired to give a damn.

"He's alright," Faith interrupted Willow as Oz came over to see what was going on, "B just knocked him for a loop."

"Buffy did this," Willow said in disbelief before turning to Xander, "What did you do?"

"Duck bu," Xander moaned, clutching the ice to his head.

"What," Willow asked in confusion.

"Xander was with me when we went to that crypt with that necklace thing," Faith clarified, smiling at Xander as she did so, "We opened up a tomb that Buffy was hiding in, and she kicked him in the face cause she thought he was a vamp."

"Oh…" Willow said, "Well, still, you shouldn't be out on patrol. Look what happened."

"Duck bu," Xander replied.

"What're you saying," Willow asked, "I can't understand you."

"He's saying 'thank you,'" Oz supplied, though from his wink, Xander guessed he got the meaning.

"Oh," Willow said, "Well, you're welcome."

"Hey," they all turned as Buffy joined the crowd, "You ok there, Xander?"

"He's fine," Faith supplied, "You just busted him up a little. I set his nose, so all he needs is rest and some happy pills and he'll be good."

"Great," Buffy said, "Sorry about the nose, Xander."

"Blah," Xander said, waving her off.

"But, this does kinda add to my whole slay adjacent-" Buffy started.

"'Uffy," Xander interrupted her, "But upt!"

"Ok, ok," Buffy said, "I'll stop," she turned to Faith and said, "I tracked down that vamp. They're hiding in a warehouse with this big demon in desperate need of a Stairmaster."

"Hit 'em up," Faith asked.

"Not tonight," Buffy said, "Too tired. We'll hit 'em tomorrow night."

"Cool," Faith said, "If we're done here, I'll drive Xander home."

"Dank bu," Xander moaned as Faith lifted him up to his feet.

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"Baith," Xander asked as Faith pulled into her hotel, "Dat idn't by bome."

"I know, X," Faith said as she got out the car, "C'mon, ain't no way I'm letting you spend your night with a broken nose without some happy pills."

"Bu aft some," Xander asked as he followed her into her room.

"Yep," Faith said, "I may be a Slayer, but even I get injured at times. Here," she tossed him a pill bottle, which he missed and bent down to pick up, "Take two of those."

"Deah, bight," Xander said as he sat down on the bed and opened up the bottle, taking six of them.

"Damn, X," Faith said as she took away the bottle, letting him lie down on her bed, "Those things are strong enough to affect me, what d'you think they're gonna do to you?"

Her answer was his snore.

"…You son of a bitch," Faith laughed.