Chapter 9

One night; that was all the Rattlesnake wanted. Matt had tried to offer him money, only to be laughed at. Money wasn't exactly a necessity for wrestling superstar Stone Cold Steve Austin. But he had nothing else to offer… except the obvious. The Rattlesnake stood firm without negotiation. The only option was to take it or leave it and see what happens next.

Matt now understood Austin's threats were legit. It was amazing to think one man could have so much power, but he did. If Austin wanted things to happen, they happened. He didn't even need to be present, for he had his mindless clique always backing him up. And it was promised more surprises were in store. A special surprise was being saved for the 'Hell in a Cell' match, Austin was scheduled to have against Rob. Matt was already surprised, this being the first he'd heard about the match. Rob hadn't said anything. Did he even know?

Matt's first thought was Austin had set the whole thing up as he did with Jeff's match. But according to the Rattlesnake, somebody else had presented Vince with the idea and Vince approached him, asking if he'd agree to it. Matt didn't know what to believe. Either way, according to Austin, the match wasn't set in stone yet and he could easily back out, claiming his neck was bothering him too much. That is if Matt complied. Otherwise Rob would suffer the consequences. Matt didn't want to imagine what Austin would do inside a cell. Triple-H would no doubt be there and probably other members of the clique.

"How do you expect me to trust you?" Matt whispered, so not to be overheard. "How can I possibly believe you'd back out?"

Austin chuckled on the other end of the cellphone. "Believe what you want, kid. It's entirely up to you. Just remember, whatever happens in the cell will be all on you."

Feeling his stomach knot up, Matt stood, unable to reply. But it was no longer necessary, the Rattlesnake had hung up. Closing his cellphone, Matt folded his arms across his chest and leaned against the building of the hospital.

The heat of the concrete against his back was somewhat soothing and he closed his eyes as the warm breeze blew stray strains of hair across his face. A typical beautiful day in California. Yet as much as he would have liked, it was hard to see the day for what it was. Hard to see past the cloud of despair that seemed to overshadow his very soul.

Jeff had damaged his arm to the point that it had to be reset. Amazingly he didn't need surgery. Emotionally and physically exhausted, and doped up on painkillers, Jeff slept practically the entire time. Matt knew his brother felt no pain, but still left the room unable to watch as the doctor manipulated his bones back in place.

As it turned out the Diamondback rattlesnake was nothing more than a useless piece of reptile shit. Due to being de-venom, it wasn't even capable of poisoning a mouse. However Matt found no relief in the knowledge. If anything, he felt worse. All of his brother's trauma had been in vain. Yet just one night with the Rattlesnake and it could all be over. Matt opened his eyes and sighed. There had to be something else he could do. Something else the Rattlesnake could want. He simply couldn't comprehend why the Rattlesnake would want him and how or why this all came about.

A beeper went off and Matt glanced over at the Scrub Tech, standing just a few feet away on a cigarette break.

The tech pulled the beeper from his waist, looked at it and at his fresh-lit cigarette. He then looked at Matt and shrugged. "Duty calls." He said smiling.

Matt forced a return smile, although it was a weak attempt. The tech regarded Matt a moment then his expression turned to recognition. Matt tried not to notice. At the moment the last thing he wanted to do was sign an autograph. Thankfully the tech didn't ask. The guy probably thought he was dealing with some sort of life or death situation. He wasn't too far from the truth.

The tech walked over to Matt and handed him the cigarette. Matt took it absently, assuming the guy was going to ask him to hold it for a minute. Instead the tech gave him a friendly pat on the shoulder. "Hate to waste one and it looks like you could use it anyway. Hope things go well in the ring." He smiled and walked away.

"Thanks." Matt said quietly, not bothering to tell the guy he didn't smoke. Might as well appreciate the few acts of kindness left in this miserable world. Hell, maybe he could use it.

He brought the cigarette to his lips and took a slow drag, careful not to choke. He remembered sneaking around and smoking in high school, like most kids do, but never really cared for it. This wasn't so bad though. He'd never tried menthol.

Taking another drag, he inhaled deeper and closed his eyes. Not being a smoker, he was beginning to feel a little lightheaded, which was kind of a welcome change.

"What are you doing?"

Matt started and looked over to see Rob had just exited the emergency room doors. Rob walked over, frowning at the cigarette.

"Nothing." Matt shrugged.

"Uh, I didn't know you smoked."

Matt took another drag and quietly stared ahead. "You know what I want?" He asked, after a moment.

Rob leaned on the wall beside him. "What?" He would gladly give Matt anything he desired if it would bring him out of his dark state.

"I want to roll in the grass." Matt said, wistfully.

Rob furrowed his brow, not sure he understood. He waited to see if Matt would continue, but Matt still stared ahead. Following his gaze, Rob realized Matt was watching a group of kids playing in a park across the street.

When he saw a couple of kids roll down a small grassy hill, it dawned on Rob. The kids played so happily in their own little carefree world. Completely innocent and naive to the cruel realities of the adult world that surrounded them.

Rob looked at Matt, unable to find anything to say. He wanted more than anything to be able to give Matt that kind of world and to share it with him. Matt just gave him a melancholy smile. He didn't expect Rob to have the power to give it to him.

~*~

Later that night Matt sat on the motel bed watching Monday Night Raw. He'd been scheduled to perform on the live show while Jeff was scheduled to simply make an appearance, but in lue of everything that had happened, Vince gave them both a few nights off.

"Chris is wrestling next." Matt informed his brother.

"Finally." Jeff murmured, lying on the other bed. Still doped up, he kept fading in and out of sleep during the show. He fell asleep once more before the commercial break ended.

Matt didn't wake him again. With their constant hectic lifestyle, they were always in need of the extra rest anyway. Climbing off the bed, he went to his bag, grabbed the pack of cigarettes he'd purchased earlier, and stepped outside the motel room. He left the door open a crack and quietly smoked while listening to whatever was happening on the television.

Minutes later, Rob's voice come across the TV and Matt peeked inside. Rob was doing an in-ring promo and issued a challenge to Stone Cold, daring the Rattlesnake to face him in a match—A Hell in a Cell match. Matt frowned. So Rob knew about the match after all.

The Rattlesnake's image appeared on the titan-tron, via satellite, and he accepted Rob's challenge. The audience cheered with excitement. Matt let out a frustrated sigh. The match was now officially set in stone. What the hell was Rob thinking? Why the hell didn't he say anything? Rob had no fucking clue what the Rattlesnake had in store.

"Now what am I suppose to fucking do?" Matt muttered to himself. Closing the door, he tossed his cigarette off the second story balcony, sat on the steps and lit up another. He wasn't sure how long he sat outside, but was in no hurry to go in. The room was stuffy and suffocating, while outside the night was breezy and warm. Quite a contrast compared to a few weeks ago when they were traveling through the extreme winter weather of the North West.

Matt looked at his watch and saw it was almost 10pm. Monday Night Raw was over and it was safe to assume most of his co-workers were gone from the arena and making plans for the evening. Due to the West Coast schedule, the live shows started and ended early. There was plenty of time left over to clean up, eat out with a group of friends, and head downtown to the clubs or bars. One of the main reasons he loved working shows in Southern California. Tonight was absolutely perfect. Last time they were here, the only thing on his mind was leaving the arena in time so he could get ready to go out, but Amy and Trish always held him up with all their unnecessary primping.

Matt crossed his arms over his knees and sighed. Everything was so different now. It felt like he'd been living in a dream world this entire time and was finally waking up to reality. And it was a nightmare. He took a drag off his cigarette, feeling anxious, yet at the same time exhausted. The last time he'd slept was when he'd slept with Rob. Shit, was that really just last night? It felt like a week ago.

A car pulled into the parking lot and Rob and Chris step out. Matt watched dully as they gathered their bags and started up the stairs. Due to everything going on, they all decided to start sharing motel rooms for a few weeks. It would save money, but more then anything, it was extra security. No one knew what could possibly happen next or when.

"How's Jeff?" Chris asked as he approached Matt at the top of the stairs. He stopped and blinked, noticing the cigarette in Matt's hand.

"He's fine." Matt almost smiled, for some reason finding the startled look on Chris's face humorous. All this shit was probably making him twisted. "He's inside, out cold."

"Um… thanks." Chris exchanged looks with Rob. Not sure what to think, he walked past Matt and entered the room.

Rob moved up the steps, standing in front of Matt. "How are you?"

Matt flicked his ashes without looking up. "Fine."

"You sure? Because one of the things I've learned about you is you tend to bottle things up. It's not healthy."

"How am I suppose to be, Rob?" Matt asked suddenly annoyed. "Am I suppose to be sitting here trembling with fear? Or inside hiding? Or would you rather see me fucking breakdown so you can…" Matt stopped, cringing at himself. He hadn't meant to raise his voice, let alone take shit out on Rob. "I'm sorry. I don't know what's wrong with me."

"You're angry." Rob said calmly. "And it's okay, you have every right to be."

Rob was so understanding, Matt wasn't sure if he should still be annoyed or grateful. He finally looked up, deciding on the latter. "I'm really am sorry."

"Don't be." Rob held out his hand and pulled Matt to his feet. "If you're angry, be angry. If you need to vent or take it out on me, do it. You don't have to hold back. I can take it."

Matt forced a smile. "You might be sorry you said that. So how did everything go tonight?"

"Did you watch?"

"Only a little."

Rob hesitated. "Well, there's something I need to tell you. Incase you didn't see, I—"

"Tell me tomorrow." Matt interrupted.

"But—"

"Tomorrow." Matt knew what Rob was going to tell him and simply couldn't deal with it now. At the moment, he had too much on his mind. "I'm really tired. I just want to get some sleep, okay?"

They went inside the room. Matt and Chris changed while Rob jumped into the shower. Jeff was oblivious to it all. Chris sat next to Jeff's sleeping form. "Man, he's really is out cold."

Matt nodded and climbed into his own bed. "He tried to stay awake for your match, but…"

"It's okay. He needs the extra sleep."

Matt watched as Chris smoothed back Jeff's hair and placed a soft kiss on his brother's forehead. Despite whether Jeff could hear him or not, Chris whispered something into his ear, before lying down next to him. Matt guessed it was 'I love you'.

Matt turned away, rolling onto his stomach. Jeff and Chris had such an amazing relationship it was like they were put in this earth for each other. And suddenly he felt an odd sense of jealousy towards Jeff. Was it too much of a stretch to believe, he could one day have something similar? Especially considering he had no experience when it came to real relationships, let alone that type of relationship.

Minutes later, Matt stirred, sensing movement in the room and raised his head to see Rob.

"I didn't mean to wake you." Rob whispered, coming up to the bed.

"You didn't." Matt replied, hearing the grogginess in his voice. He hadn't realized he'd fallen asleep.

Rob picked up a blanket from the end of the bed. "I'll crash on the couch."

"Why?"

Rob shrugged. "Just thought you'd like the bed to yourself."

"It's a big bed." Matt reached over to the other side of the bed and flipped down the covers. "There's plenty of room."

Rob smiled, set aside the blanket and climbed in next to Matt. Matt returned a drowsy smile, wrapped his arms around the pillow and laid his head back down. He closed his eyes, feeling more at ease by Rob's presence. It was a nice feeling; something he could get used to. Somehow he had to get Rob out of the match. Otherwise there would be no way to stop the inevitable.

But Rob had other plans. Apparently Matt hadn't seen the promo he did during the show. He wanted to tell Matt about his plans for the Hell in a Cell match, but wanted to wait and see if Vince would actually go for it. Vince did, Austin agreed, and the match was on. He wasn't sure how Matt was going to take it. Matt was strong and proud, determine to take care of things on his own. Yet as Rob watched him for a few moments, the strong, proud mask slowly faded away as Matt slept. He looked softer, much younger than he was, and more innocent than he may have been. It was hard to imagine how anyone would want to harm him. And Rob was determined that once he was finished with Austin, no one ever would.

~*~

The next morning they sat in a small cafe eating breakfast. Besides signing some autographs for a few fans that approached them, no one said much of anything. Matt took a bite of his eggs, forcing himself to eat, yet the unsettling stir in his stomach made it difficult.

Rob glanced over at him, trying to come up with something to bring Matt out of his dark mood. However, he had no idea what to do or say.

Jeff didn't even bother putting on a pretence of eating. Between the after affects of the medication and everything else, he simply felt dull with no desire to do shit.

Chris sighed, feeling in the same boat as Rob. He felt absolutely helpless. He absently rubbed his sore neck, thinking how the whole morning seemed sore.

"What's wrong?"

Chris looked over, surprised to hear Jeff speak. "Nothing. Jay's unprettier was kind of brutal last night."

Jeff nodded, understanding. Jay was always sure to call the move before he gave it, but it was still a legitimate move that could leave one feeling it for a while. "Sorry I missed the match."

"It wasn't anything spectacular." Chris assured.

Jeff just nodded again while absently playing with the food on his plate.

"So Chris, when are you suppose to be flying out?" Rob asked, hoping to get a conversation started. Anything to take their mind off things. "You're becoming such a big shot, we hardly ever see you anymore."

Chris lightly smiled. "I spoke with Vince this morning, plans have changed. He said I wasn't needed on this extra trip."

Matt regarded Chris quietly, not sure what to make of the statement. The Rattlesnake had enough influence to be able to effect his, his brother's, and his friends' careers. Austin had already promised as much. But Austin couldn't start changing things that fast. Maybe it was just a coincidence. "Why aren't you needed?"

Chris shrugged. "He didn't really say. I guess their changing the angle or something, because he also canceled my match for tonight."

Matt dropped his fork on the plate with a loud clank.

"What is it?" Rob asked, regarding Matt with concern.

"Nothing." Matt picked his fork back up. Please let this be a coincidence. "It just seems weird. I'm mean… you're a main-event superstar, Chris, and this isn't a house show, it's Smackdown. Fans expect to see you, Vince knows that!"

"Chill Man, it's not like I was fired." Chris assured, chuckling at Matt's concern. "I think he's just giving me a night off, and believe me I could use it. I've been running non-stop these past few weeks, doing all this extra promo work. I'll gladly let someone else have a turn." Chris turned to Jeff. "Besides when was the last time we had a full day off together without going home? Lets make the most of it."

Jeff gave Chris a small smile. "I need to wash my hands, I'll be right back." He left the table.

Matt watched him walk away. Jeff's somber mood seemed to lighten a little, but not much. Hearing Chris's long sigh, he looked over and for the first time noticed how tired his friend looked. He managed a smile for Chris. "I think it will help spending the day with you. He'll be okay."

"I hope so." Chris smiled back. "I'm just glad he slept through the night without any... I guess you could say nightmares. I thought for sure this incident would bring them on, but maybe it helped with you being there."

"Nightmares?"

Chris nodded to himself. "Yeah. After that twisted fucked up match with Austin, I woke him twice that week. Both times, he was dreaming about the match, but instead of breaking his arm, Austin paralyzed him. " He noticed Matt surprised expression. "You didn't know?"

Matt shook his head. "No. He never said anything."

"Oh. I thought he would have."

Matt looked toward the bathroom. How could he have not realized how deeply everything was affecting Jeff? He knew his brother's greatest fear was to one day take that one risk that would cause paralysis. By the grace of God, Jeff somehow always escaped serious injury, despite all his high-flying and death-defying stunts. Austin breaking his arm was the first serious injury he'd actually ever had.

"I'll be back." Matt stood and made his way to the bathroom. When he entered, Jeff was standing at the sink. "Why didn't you tell me you had nightmares about him?"

Jeff dried his hands slowly. Matt couldn't just ease into things, he always had to get right to the point. "Like you don't have enough on your mind without having to worry about me. It was a couple of stupid dreams that's all. No big deal."

"I'm your older brother, I'm always going to worry about you, Jeff." Matt said. "And if it wasn't such a big deal, you wouldn't have had these dreams. You know you can talk to me about anything."

"You want to talk Matt?" Jeff threw away the paper towel and turned to face his brother. "Fine lets talk. So how long have you been a smoker?"

Matt blinked. "What? I'm not, I mean—"

"You think I can't smell it on you? You think I didn't notice you sneaking outside last night?"

"It was a couple of cigarettes." Matt shrugged. "No big deal."

"Then what's the point in doing it?" Jeff snapped. "To get cancer? To fuck up your ring performance?"

Matt frowned at Jeff's tone. He didn't need to answer for his actions. "I wouldn't talk if I were you. I know you've smoked a few things in your day and it damn sure wasn't cigarettes, so drop it."

Jeff crossed his arms. It was true, he didn't have room to talk, but it didn't piss him off any less.

Jeff had always worn his emotions on his sleeve and Matt could clearly see his brother's anger. "Look, Jeff, I didn't come in here to start a fight. I just want to make sure you're okay."

"Okay?" Jeff held up his cast. "Does this look okay, Matt? I've never done anything to Austin. Nothing! Everything was fine until you had to get in his face and open your fucking mouth! Don't you get it? Everything that's happened, everything he's done is because of you!" He regretted the words the second he finished saying them. The second he saw Matt flinch and try to hide it.

Matt stood, unable to speak. It was true. He hadn't even realized until now, but he truly was the one responsible for bringing this down on them. And there was nothing he could do or say to take it back. He quickly turned to leave the room.

"Wait!" Jeff grabbed Matt's arm, stopping him. "I'm sorry." He threw his arms around his brother. "I didn't mean it, I swear. Please forgive me."

Matt hesitated then returned Jeff's embrace. "It's okay. Everyone's under a lot of stress right now."

"Maybe," Jeff stepped back, wishing he could lower through the floor. "But I really didn't mean what I said. None of this is your fault, Matt, none ." However, he knew his words were useless. The damage had been done.

Matt just nodded for his brother's sake. He didn't want Jeff to feel guilty for telling the truth. He appreciated it. Now he knew his mistake and he knew what he had to do to fix it. He stepped past Jeff and went over to the sink. What little bit of breakfast he ate was stirring in his stomach, making him want to throw up. But he couldn't get sick now. He had to stay strong.

Ignoring his stomach, he sat on the counter and pulled his cigarettes from his pocket. He really didn't care what anyone thought. Really didn't care that this was a non-smoking establishment. If he was lucky someone would catch him and call the police then he could happily rot away in a cell.

Jeff watched as his brother held a cigarette in his mouth while trying to light a match. He tried over and over, but his hands lightly shook. He simply couldn't strike it.

"Fucking piece of shit." Matt threw the book of matches down. No wonder he was incapable of protecting his brother. He wasn't even capable of lighting a fucking match.

Jeff picked up the book, struck a match and held it out for Matt.

Matt regarded him a moment, then finally lit up. Inhaling the smoke, he scooted back on the counter and leaned against the mirror.

Jeff climbed on the counter and sat beside him, no longer caring about the smoke. All that mattered was for Matt to know he was with him. He waited patiently while Matt finished his cigarette, having no clue the plans Matt was forming in his mind.