"White, are you sure you want to-"
"Shh! Yes, I'm sure!"
Actually, I wasn't that sure.
"This may be our only chance before it gets too cold out, N..." I stared up at him with what I hope were sad-looking eyes. He gave me a pouting look for a second before throwing his arms around me, catching me completely off-guard.
"I didn't say we couldn't! I was just thinking there were more fun things to do! We can do whatever makes you happy, White!" he cried into my neck.
I paused, then laughed, shoving him away. "Let's go, then!" Without a second thought, I grabbed N's hand and ran towards Reshiram.
And that was how we ended up in Nimbasa City, staring up at the massive ferriswheel.
The date being November 1st, weeks after we had visited my mother, the air was already chilly, and for a moment I regretted my decision. But when an arm wrapped securely around my waist, I suddenly felt warm- and safe.
I looked up at N with curiosity but didn't protest. He smiled. "You looked cold," was all he said.
Due to the temperature of the air along with the overall weather- gray skies and windy-, the amusement park was almost empty. There was no one on the ferriswheel, and the older-looking man controlling it didn't look happy to be there.
I'm not sure what brought on suddenly wanting to ride the ferriswheel, other than the obvious-
This was the place I had my first real conversation with N.
After that day, I saw N differently than I ever suspected to. He wasn't like Black or Cheren anymore- he wasn't a rival.
He was the enemy.
Though, as true as that may be, it didn't... it never made me feel any differently. He was still somebody that I had to train my hardest to beat.
It was just more important than before.
Every single battle against N along my journey, I was the winner. I was victorious. I was the stronger of us- me and my pokemon that will forever be the winners in my eyes. But after every single battle that N lost... he never looked upset. He was never mad that he lost. He would just look at me with a sad smile and thank me for the battle, then disappear for a week or so. It was like... he didn't care that his organization was losing and we were winning.
It was like he knew that no matter what, I would be the winner in the end.
Because despite losing the most important battle of my life, I know that I didn't lose. I still won, because I still managed to change Plasma's views of things- all thanks to the help of N.
N...
It's not terrible, living with N. I don't even regret losing the battle and getting forced into this. It's... almost like a bonus. It's another thing that I've won.
I'm still winning.
"White? What are you thinking about?"
I looked up in surprise at N's voice. I had been so caught up in my thoughts that I hadn't even noticed as he payed for our tickets and led me onto the pokeball-shaped cage. The door shut, and we began moving.
N's arm never left my waist.
I chuckled at the worried expression on his face. "Nothing important." Liar.
He was silent for a moment, staring out the side of the cage. When he looked back at me, he had a thoughtful expression on his face.
"This was where I told you that I work with Team Plasma, isn't it?" I nodded, knowing that it wasn't a real question. Neither of us would have ever forgotten that day.
It changed our fates.
Twisted them.
"... And some day, I shall be the king of Team Plasma."
I flashed him a smirk, while in truth, I was shaking. "And I'll be the one who knocks you off your throne."
The ferriswheel had stopped moving. Without another word, I stepped off, striding away with a quick pace and breaking into a sprint the moment I was out of his sight.
"What did you think of me after that?"
The question echoed several times in my mind before it really sunk in that he was asking a question. I avoided his gaze, unsure what to think.
"I thought... I thought that I had been an idiot for long enough and needed to get my emotions in order before we met again."
N looked at me with a confused expression. Obviously, my words had made absolutely no sense to him, and when I thought them over, they didn't really make sense to me either.
But it was still one of the most truthful things I had ever said.
"To think... I was thinking that way about someone who should have been my enemy..." I laughed in spite of myself.
N's face still showed confusion, and now, hurt. "Thinking... what way?"
"There was always a part of me that... loved you..." My voice came out a whisper, cracking on the last word.
"White..."
I didn't even realize I was crying until a tear hit my hand and it instantly felt cold. I looked away from N, staring out at the gray sky. "It was wrong. It was always wrong. I couldn't... I couldn't feel that way about you. You were the leader of the people that I despised. I knew that... I would let my emotions control me, which could be fatal in a battle."
When N remained silent, I looked at him through my tears with a sad smile. "Dragonspiral Tower."
"What do you mean?"
"That day that I was in Dragonspiral Tower. By that point, I had come to realize that my emotions weren't going to obey me. That day... I was ready to give up. There was no way I could do it; no way I could defeat you when my thoughts were clouded. I fell on the stairs, crying, telling myself that I couldn't do it. And... then you showed up."
It showed on N's face as he remembered. "That was when... I told you that you had to try; had to give it your all; had to beat me. Because...-"
"-no one else was capable of it," I finished.
"White... I hadn't realized..."
"Don't say anything," I said firmly. "Please. Don't."
So, instead of speaking, N did something that shocked me- he moved closer, using a finger to gently brush away the remaining tears. Once finished, he leaned towards me, pressing a light kiss to my forehead. I felt my cheeks heat up.
"N...?"
He pressed a finger to my lips, silencing me. "White, dearest... I know that this is probably not the right time to do this, and that you probably wish it would happen somewhere else, but..." Breaking off mid-sentence, he dropped to one knee in front of me. He moved his finger away, and I gave a silent gasp as he pulled something out of his jacket pocket.
Holding it in one hand and gripping my hand with the other, he started. "White... I don't know much about 'love,' or 'romance.' And in complete honesty... I feel that I know next to nothing about you, the person who has made me want to spend the rest of my life with her in a matter of four months. White, no matter how you may feel about yourself, I find you absolutely amazing. I want to have forever to learn more about you. Will you marry me?" With the last word, he opened the box, revealing a ring with an emerald that matched the color of his eyes perfectly.
I pulled him up with the hand that was holding his. He was startled, even more so as I pulled him forward and pressed my lips against his.
I left it at that.
