Alright, so first off: I'm sorry. Truly, honestly sorry, this story is one of my favorites, yet for some reason, it is always the one that gets pushed behind other stories, mostly my original pieces, despite the fact I love it and I want Edmund out of the place I keep leaving him in. I guess the pro and con to being the writer is that I know the ending. Still, I will do better and now for the second: thank you. You guys have guilt tripping down to the art and the reviews do interesting things to me. A mix of utter glee, pride that you guys actually enjoy it, and feeling like a scolded child who didn't do their homework. So. I hope that you enjoy it.

It was a somber return that greeted them the night of their arrival. Cair Paraveil was silent; its inhabitants gathered outside in the light of dusk to greet their monarchs return. Even the sun hid behind the clouds before the sunset.

Edmund had fallen unconscious upon arrival and his face was still tense, body strung like a bow as if he was fleeing from nightmares. But as they stepped back onto the soil of their home his face relaxed just a little and a hint of color returned to his skin, as if the very land was bringing him back into her embrace.

But still the crowds parted as Peter rushed through with a limp Edmund in his arms, the Queens only steps behind, still they stayed somber as the healers took Edmund from Peter's arms and into a chamber with the door closed. They did not interfere, only talked quietly with each other.

When they saw their monarchs with tears in their eyes, they did not stare.

When a healer exited the room to speak to the High King, they did not clamor.

They merely waited, prayed to Aslan for their King's sake.

And when a scream rent the air, they cried for his sake as well.

They knew that their King suffered.

. . . . .

The healer had infuriatingly little to say of Edmund's condition, only that they had bandaged his injuries and that they were searching for a cure, doing the best they could for him, though that wasn't much.

"This is an infliction of the mind and spirit," the centaur said. "There is very little that we can do for him without knowing the cause. For the moment we can only treat his injuries, attempt to soothe him, and pray to Aslan for knowledge."

It incensed me. My whole life, I had watched out for my siblings, but I had always watched out for my brother especially. Even in the dark days of war and England and all the disagreements between us, I had always been able to do something. It hadn't always been that appreciated, most definitely, but it was something. During our time in this wonderful, dangerous, beautiful land, our beloved kingdom, that tendency had only grown. Edmund and I had learned to trust and depend on each other once more, he had become the one I could turn to for laughter and advice, my best friend, my sparring partner in times of anger and my guardian in times of war.

To be certain, my sisters were no less important to me, both of them lent joy and beauty, grace and love to the both of us, but duos filled our number. Susan and Lucy could charm even the most hardhearted, Edmund and I could whirl through a battlefield leaving no enemy standing in our wake, the two youngest could manage a round of politics like no one else, Lucy gently putting them at ease while Edmund's silver tongue wove a seemingly perfect solution, and Susan and I were the perfect fronts to any lookers on. Together we made a formidable group, the perfect temperance for any rulers, and the perfect balance for any family. To be sure, we were knocked off kilter at times, but through Aslan's Grace we always found a way to help both each other and ourselves back onto the Lion's path.

But now? I couldn't help with this.

My brother, my confidant and friend lay behind only a wooden door, but it was as if he lay behind an impenetrable fortress. His mind was closed to me, my very presence caused him distress. I yearned to be with him, to help him through the nightmares, but I could do nothing for them. My brother had to face this darkness alone.

A small sound broke my thoughts and I turned to find Lucy, dear, sweet little Lucy crying into Susan's shoulder as they tried to comfort each other. Guilt encompassed me immediately. I couldn't help one sibling, but I could help the others and I was failing.

Quickly I stepped forward and pulled them close. Susan's form began to tremble immediately and I felt her silent tears on my sleeve and my heart broke further.

"What can we do?" Lucy's quiet strained whisper broke the silence moments later and the silence continued after. I had nothing to say, no way to answer. Luckily, Susan was the smart one in the family and answered where I couldn't.

"We can help the healer's search for a cure. We can ensure that Edmund knows that we are still there for him and that his nightmares are just a passing thing as best we can. They had already begun to lose their grip when we arrived, the poison must have started to weaken further. The worst is past, Lucy. With Aslan's help, Edmund will endure. Remember? He is never far off."

Susan's words rang true, but doubt still lay heavy in my thoughts. Perhaps the poison dreams were past, but were they truly the worst? I still remembered in the early days of our reign, how Edmund's dreams would fill the nights, causing shadows under the eyes that on some days would not fully lift from shame and fear. How he would work himself to exhaustion trying to stop his people, his family even, from rejecting him. I remembered how he would pale and quiet in winter, how little he trusted his own judgment, how desperate he was for forgiveness when the only one left to forgive him was himself. Was the worst truly past? Or was it merely the beginning?

. . . . .

I didn't know where I was. The windows were open and centaur healers ventured into the room, easing some distant part of my mind, but all the same I knew that this was some hallucination, some new cruelty to torment me and test the bounds of my sanity. It was surprisingly ingenious and kept me in a constant state of worry that the other hand would fall shortly. I wondered when my siblings would come. Well, my dream ones and my nightmare ones. I had just decided to differentiate them in my mind after the painful amount of confusion I faced at seeing two, one cruel, one kind. I didn't trust either.

When I was young, I used to be afraid of the dark and Mum and Dad would give me nightlights, promising that they would keep the monsters away. I remember, now, that I used to dream of a woman in white with a cruel smile and a staff of ice. I only wish now that I had kept on fearing that woman. But the nightlight did its duty and kept the monsters at bay, until a storm came. It was ferocious, wind tearing at the house and trees and driving the rain and thunder with it. Erratic bursts of lightning lit my frightened eyes, but still the nightlight kept the monsters away. Then the light flickered and darkness flooded the room. I remember screaming into my pillow in symphony with a clap of thunder and hearing my little sister begin to cry. I saw my Mum rush past my room, but I was too scared to call out. My shield was gone, the monsters would come now I was sure of it. I stayed there, cowering under my blankets for several minutes, trying to distract myself from the creatures that were surely running amok in my room now, when I heard his voice.

My older brother had rescued me that night, had saved me from the fears of my childhood and had taken into his room where we weathered the storm together. After that night I learned to distrust nightlights during storms and to sneak across the hall and under the covers of my protector until I grew older and more arrogant and too angry for an older brother's comfort.

Now though, now I longed for it. I longed for those childish fears and for my brother. But that wasn't quite true. His face, angry and hateful stilled filled my minds' eye. My sisters' words still echoed in my ears and Her laugh, haunting, cruel, and cutting still rang in the air. I could not withstand it alone, but all the same, I knew that they would break me.

"Aslan…" I whispered. "Aslan, please. I- I cannot bear this any longer on my own. Please!" My voice quieted again. "Please."

"Peace, dear one. I am with you." His voice rumbled through my mind and I felt fear leave me for the first time in what felt like weeks.

"Aslan, what am I to do?" This thought especially had been plaguing me. "How can I rule justly or even live bravely with this fear? I don't know what is real or what I'm dreaming. I can't sleep, but all the same, I don't know if I'm awake. When they come or if they come, how can I help them, if I can't even manage to be near them. I can't laugh with Lucy or ward off suitors from Susan or even talk to Peter, not when I hear all the things they said in the back of my mind and hear truth."

"Edmund," His voice stopped me gently. "Do you remember what I told your family, upon your arrival?"

"That all was in the past, but-"

"Edmund, you have been forgiven for your actions and have been granted a second chance. You have done your best to stay true to that since. My son, you know both the darkness and the light, truth and lies. The words that have been spoken in your mind are not your family and you know this. Those are your own fears, Edmund and you will need to overcome them to heal. You know this, Edmund."

"Yes, Aslan, but how?"

"You know who you have to turn to Edmund. Your love for your family and your people will never lead you astray at any time, but especially in times of fear. Trust them again, Edmund."

My eyes snapped open to the dark of the room and I breathed a sigh of relief that the nightmare had passed for a moment. I knew that my fears were the cause, but still to my senses they were real and the memories certainly acted as such. I wasn't sure how to overcome my fear, but, all the same, it was beyond comforting to have felt the Lion's love ease my heart for a time.

My path would be revealed in time, that I knew.

Relaxing into my bed I breathed out a quick sigh, before light hit my eyes from my opening door. Bolting upright again, my frightened eyes met my brothers' startled blue and I leapt backwards, heart pounding and head bowed in wait for the cruel words I knew would come. But despite the fact I knew this was a dream, that I knew my siblings would come to save me from this soon, I still trembled, still paled, and still traitorous tears sprang to my lowered eyes.

My heart faltered when he touched me gently on the cheek, wiping away my tears, I flinched when I heard him draw breath, and I curled up when he tentatively edged closer.

"Oh Ed." His voice was a sad sigh, impotent rage lurking underneath and it was exactly the tones that I had wanted to hear for days. "What did they do?" I doubted his question was expecting of an answer, but still rage and fear leapt into my throat, vying for a voice, because he knew, he knew what they had done for weeks and what did he want from me? I had faith in the Lion, had faith in Narnia, but I didn't know if I could be brave enough to trust my real King and Queens again and how dare he pretend that he wasn't the one that had done all of it.

. . . . .

Silence was all that existed in the room and I was convincing myself to leave, to leave this brother who didn't trust me so that he could have distance from the fear, when his head snapped up and blazing brown eyes met mine and a soft, deadly voice spoke. It was a voice I heard in wartime, in chambers of ambassadors with barely veiled hatred that Edmond knew how to manipulate, a voice that I had never, ever heard directed toward me.

"You know what happened."

So… what did you think? Personally, I didn't like the ending, but I like the next part, so there is that. Review and all that jazz?

Lovely day, my fantastic readers,

SMM