So I have to say, writing that story was the most fun i've had in a really long time. I've always knew in my head that, that fan fiction would have 9 chapters. So here it is. Enjoy!
Emma had finally made Killian move on the bed that was in the tree house, helping him settle down, before joining him. Usually, she would be the one leaning on him, being the hugged one, but she wanted to be able to soothe Killian and it would be easier if she was being the one hugging him.
She pushed him away when he tried to pull her into his arms, and she pressed a finger to his lips when he tried to complain about it. She shook her head, smiled before laying on her back, pulling his head down, pillowing him on her breast, his ear right above her heart. She was using everything that normally soothe her on him. One of her hand was dancing through his hair, the other one was drawing up and down is spine, knowing how much her touch helped him keep him calm.
⠀⠀- You'll be okay.
She had murmured these words in his hair, pressing a kiss at the top of his scalp, his hair tickling her nose. She smiled softly, pressing another kiss there before ducking her head, pressing her cheek on his head. Killian's body sagged against her, pressing her deeper in the mattress, she kept her hands moving, not wanted to disturb him while he was finally falling asleep. Keeping an eyes on him, she didn't allow herself to fall asleep, wanted to be here and awake if he woke up panicked. After an hour, of just looking at him, trying not to move too much, she finally let slumber take her away.
Emma was jostled awake when she felt someone trashing next to her. Not being really awake, she didn't realise what disturbed her sleep was actually Killian. When realisation set in, she sat up straight, trying to shake him awake. In a cold sweat, Killian gasped and opened his eyes, pulling himself out of his nightmare. Completely disoriented, sweaty and panting, he pushed himself away from Emma, pressing himself onto the wall, putting as much distance as he could between him and Emma. She watch disarmed. Touching him was out of the equation, it would only push him even deeper into the hole he was digging for himself.
⠀⠀- Killian..? Emma lay back down, facing him. She was close enough to touch him but far enough not to scare him. Babe?
Killian was looking at her face, eyes unfocused. He was still lost in the haze of his nightmare. Calling his name, just trying to get a reaction out of him. After quite some time, Killian's eyes finally locked with hers, and she offered him a small smile, pressing tentatively a hand to his cheek.
⠀⠀- It's okay, babe. You're okay.
He nodded, closing his eyes and taking a deep breathe. She let him lead the pace of their exchange. He finally moved forward, until their foreheads met and his nose nuzzled hers. Hand sliding around her waist, under the shirt she was wearing. He suddenly pulled her closer, crushing her onto his chest, she followed his action, allowing her body to be pulled and snuggled into him.
⠀⠀- I just.. I saw him die, and how crazy is that? I don't even know how he dies.
⠀⠀- It's okay, you're trying to understand it, your mind it trying to fill in the blanks. We'll talk to Dad tomorrow, okay? but you need to sleep.
It took some more of soothing words from Emma, to finally convince Killian to try and sleep some more. It took even longer for him to actually fall asleep. He was constantly moving, struggling to find a comfortable position. He finally settled on them laying on their side, his face shoved onto her cleavages, arms around each others.
Mary-Margaret walked in first, trying not to make any sounds in case they were still sleeping, David following her. She stopped them when she saw how they were sleeping, Killian was completely wrapped around Emma, his face pressed against neck, arms around her waist, and no even an inch in between them. Emma seemed to be awake if the movement of her hands were to believe.
She was moving her fingers through his dark locks and her second hand was moving up and down his back, sooting him. She smiled at the picture, she could not stop herself. That was what she used to do when Emma was sad. David walked behind her, arms snaking around her and she leaned into him, her hand interlacing with his.
Their combined weight made the wood cracked which prompted Emma to look up. She smiled sadly, pressing a finger to her lips, indicating to be silent. She looked exhausted and the red rimmed around her eyes wasn't helping either. Her parents nodded, and walked closer to them, they both dropped a kiss on her forehead, before sitting on the couch in front of the younger couple.
Emma could hear her parents murmuring, probably giving her time to wake Killian up. She looked down, and she could still see the tear tracks on his cheeks, the was his eyes were puffy even when they were closed. She pressed a kiss on his forehead, shaking him slowly. She had to wake him, but she didn't want to if it was to see him cry, like yesterday.
Killian started moving around, the first think she notices was his lips, pressing against her neck which made her shiver. She tried to control her body, without any succeed. She kept kissing his forehead, and moved her hand to his cheek, caressing it, trying to roused him from sleep. She looked down to see his blue eyes looking up at her. He seemed to realise what had happened yesterday because has soon as he blinked, tears were already appearing.
She moved before he could open his mouth, aligning her body with his, pressing their forehead together, hands on his cheeks, keeping him with her.
⠀⠀- It's okay, shhh, just breathe.
Blue locked with green, forehead joined, nose touching and he kissed her. Her lips stretched into an easy smile, responding to his. He still hadn't noticed her parents and she was happy to stay in their bumble for a little while longer. Her parents made some noise, resulting in them breaking their kiss. Killian blushed and scratched behind his ear, while Emma was laughing, pressing, hiding her face in his chest.
Before any of her parents could say anything, she pressed a quick peck to his lips. Turning her body, she became the little spoon to Killian's big spoon, ready to hear the whole story. Her mom was leaning on her husband, looking up at him. She squeezed her hand as if she was giving him the strength he needed to talk.
⠀⠀- Killian, First of all, I want you to know we're both terribly sorry for you loss. We know how much Liam meant to you.
Killian tensed behind her, and Emma pulled his arms tighter around her, pressing it on her stomach. She was moving her fingers on his hand, keeping him with her. He pushed himself up a bit, looking at her parents, nodding once.
⠀⠀- Thanks..
He fell back down, hiding his face in her hair as if just saying that word took all the energy he had, which might me true since he didn't sleep much, and not that well. His hand was pulled up, and he felt lips pressing on his knuckles. Squeezing Emma's hand, thanking her silently.
⠀⠀- I'm gonna tell you everything, but please don't ask any questions..
David didn't wait for them to answer or move. He just looked at his wife, who nodded sadly. She pressed a rapid kiss to his cheek, choosing to stay behind while he repeated what he has already told her yesterday.
⠀⠀- Liam.. He died a hero.. I know it's not what you wanna hear but that's what happen. The soldier you saw yesterday, gave us tons of details that I won't give you today because it's not really relevant. I wish I didn't need to be the one telling you that, but I also feel like it has to be me. Do you remember when he was promoted Commander back in January? Both kids nodded, not daring saying anything. Killian was already on the verge of crying and Emma wasn't any better. She was holding on Killian's arm so hard, she thought she was hurting him but then he squeezed her hand and everything got a little bit better. Usually, when you become Commander, you have a group of recruits and Liam, well he was supposed to get his but then plan changed. There was these two recruits, stubborn, quite young, orphans and completely lost. The Navy was about to send them back because they had no idea how to handle them, but Liam stepped up and said he would take care of them, help them and guide them. You know how he was. Killian broke down when David use the past tense, curling on himself, trying to push Emma away, but she turned her body around, holding him again, rocking them slowly. For 5 months, Liam took them under his wing, teaching them everything he knew and everything they needed to know. He also teaches them how to be a gentleman, man and most importantly, being heroes. One day, even though they weren't in War zone, they got under attack. I wasn't given any information related to that particularly but Liam and one of his recruits were stuck into a room, until Liam was able to get them out. Panic was all over their ship, nobody was prepared for what was about to happen, but Liam had to find his other recruit. The ship was mostly empty, by the time they were able to join the upper deck. That's when they fell upon their attackers. Pirates. Logan was in the middle of them, trying not to show how scared he really was, he was trying to do everything that Liam had taught him, he clearly didn't want to let his own hero down. The kid tried to walk back to Liam and his fellow officer but he didn't have time to move more that several inches before a gunshot was heard on the sinking ship. Logan and Cameron looked at each other, expecting the other to fall down, bleeding. But when non of them moved, the finally realised what had happened. Liam had sacrificed himself to save them, these two orphans. So, Killian, when I tell you that Liam died a Hero, that's because he did.
David finished his speech, tears running down his cheek. Mary-Margaret sobbing quietly against her husband, both Emma and Killian were crying openly in each other arms. Emma was still holding onto Killian, trying to get him to stay with her and not close himself but she knew she was fighting a lost battle. She moved down a bit and pressed a kiss to his cheek, about to leave him alone when Killian pushed her away, pushing her off of the bed. Gasping, shock running through her, she looked behind her to see her parents looked like they had saw aliens or something.
Emma was still on the floor, she had pushed herself back up, sitting crossed legs in front of Killian. She looked back to her parents, to see their reaction, making sure that she hadn't dreamt any of that. Killian had never even been brutal with her, or anyone for that matter. She knew it was most likely his way to mourn but still, what was wrong with him? He was still lying down, eyes closed, shaking with unrestrained rage, sadness, she didn't know, she didn't care. She pressed her hand on his shoulder, trying to get him back in the moment, to get him back to them.
⠀⠀- Killian..?
Not even two seconds later, her hand was pushed away violently. Killian was not even looking at her. If he wanted to act like that, she she wasn't going to stay and play nice with him. She pushed on her hands, standing in front of the bed, hands on her hips. She was mad, completely destroyed by the death of Liam Jones, and her asshole of a boyfriend, was pushing her away?
⠀⠀- Fine! Don't come back crawling back to me when you'll want to talk, Killian Edwin Jones.
Emma ran out of the tree house, tears running down her cheeks. She couldn't believe Killian was pushing her away, now of all time. She was running as fast as she could, moving blindingly due to her tears. She was about to reach the stairs when a hand closed on her arm, halting her race. Yanking on the hand holding her, trying to free her arm. She didn't want to talk, she didn't want to see anyone. She just wanted to be alone, preferably in her bed.
⠀⠀- Emma Swan!
Emma stopped, she hadn't heard that deep, severe voice since she was a small kid acting like a brat. Arms going slack, she wasn't sure she was even blinking before she felt a hand on her shoulder, turning her around. She found herself in her father arms, blinking back tears, arms going around his torso. She pressed her face on his chest, trying to hide herself like she used to do. A Sob breaking free of her inside, when her father's hand move to her usual place, cradling the back of her head.
⠀⠀- Daddy..
Sagging against her dad, she let herself being comforted by her father for a little while, pushing away, she was still not able to look him into his eyes. Ashamed of what she's done, she wanted to move away and be alone, but she couldn't run away again. Not having any other choices, she pushed herself back together, placing a fake small smile on her lips, trying to get her dad to let her leave, without avail. Killian pointed to the living room with his chin, giving her the silent order to go there and sit, waiting for him.
He came back, holding a cup of hot chocolate for her to take, sitting down next to her. He took her hand in his, caressing her knuckles with his thumb. She knew what was coming even before her dad opened his mouth to talk.
⠀⠀- Let's talk about what just happened.
Head shooting up, looking at her dad like he was crazy. He wanted her to talk about what had happened just a few minutes ago? Was her father stupid? Since when should she be the one talking about it? She hadn't done anything wrong, she wasn't the one who pushed her boyfriend of 4 years away.
⠀⠀- What's there tot talk about? Killian is hurting, I get it. Do you think I'm not? Do you honestly think I'm not destroyed by his death? Liam was like my brother, he was the third man of my life, so yes i am sad, yes i want to scream and hit something but you don't see me pushing everyone away, now do you? I am not acting like a brat, and I'm still the one getting the talk.
David must not have expected her daughter to actually stood for herself, because she was not about to close her mouth, not about that. She pressed harder on the matter, saying more and more. It was like she couldn't stop defending herself for her reaction. She was not about to back off, not on that, sorry. It was her life, and if her boyfriend couldn't trust her when things got difficult, she would not put that on herself for the rest of her life.
It was as if, Emma running away, had woken Killian up. He looked up, ready to go after her, when he felt a hand on his shoulder, keeping him from moving. Looking up, his eyes locked with the same eyes as Emma, letting him know it was Mary-Margaret.
⠀⠀- You need to give her time, she's not really mad. She's just shocked. You've always handled everything together, and you just pushed her away for the first time.
Killian looked down, ashamed of what he'd done. Hurting his Emma, was the last thing he's ever wanted to do. Not being able to go to her, was hurting him, almost as much as the death of his brother. Blinking back the tears that were hanging by a slim thread, he found himself being engulfed in the warmest embrace, a mother embrace. He couldn't control his reaction, and his seconds, Killian was sobbing in his mother in law. Mary-Margaret gave him the time he needed before she started talking, she had something to tell him, than no one knew but her, and Liam.
⠀⠀- Liam asked me to tell you this if anything happened to him, and honestly I wished, prayed that I would never have to tell you, but I promised him I would.. She took a deep breathe, and hugged Killian harder against her. Liam was proud of you, always. No matter what you can think right now, Liam was proud of the man you are becoming. He's always been proud of you, and he'll be proud of you, from above. I know it's hard to believe it, but your brother was jealous of you, because you've found yourself a second family, and that what helped him make the choice of leaving with the Navy. Because he knew you wouldn't be alone, never. And you won't ever be, I promise Killian. Even if your relationship with Emma doesn't go as planned, you'll always have me and David. We will not give up on you, you're family.
Killian was trying really hard to listen and take everything in. He never knew that him finding Emma and her family would be a major decision in his departure, or that Liam was proud of him. He felt a tiny bit of hope blossom in his heart, and he smiled. Mary-Margaret was still talking but she couldn't listen anymore, she had to find Emma and apologise and hug her, and tell her how much he loved her.
Her dad had made his point, and Emma realised how stupid she had been to run off. Suddenly, jumping up from the couch, she ran outside, ready to climb up the tree house again just to be with Killian, she had lost a friend, he had lost the last member of his family. How stupid had she been to yell at him? and leave him by himself?
She was running in the direction of the tree house. Looking up to make sure nothing was on her way, she made eye contact with the man that had her heart in his hand, she ran faster, trying to get to him sooner. They collided together in the middle of the backyard, trying not to fell off. Emma jumped up, arms around his neck, legs around his hips, she pressed her body against him. Leaning toward him, their lips kiss joined in a passionate kiss. Lost in each other, they both didn't notice her mother walking next to them, leaving them alone.
Killian broke the kiss, nuzzling his face in the crook of her neck, murmuring over and over again how sorry he was, how he hadn't mean to act like that and how he needed her. Shaking her head, Emma let him know it was okay, she understood his comportment. Not that she did at the moment T, but she did now. She pressed her hands on his cheeks, pushing him away before pressing their forehead together.
⠀⠀- I'm the one who's sorry, babe. I am truly sorry for the way I acted.. I should have been there for you, and I'm a so very sorry.
Killian shook his head, pressing a quick kiss to her lips, he didn't want her apologises, not when she hadn't done anything wrong in the first place. Arms moving under her thighs, he held her firmer against his body, walking to the swing, sitting down. He kept Emma on his laps, hugging her.
⠀⠀- I love you so much, Emma Swan, and I am sorry even if you don't want to hear it.
Looking down, smiling, she pressed a quick peck to his lips before moving on his side. Sitting next to him, pulling on his arm for it to go around her shoulder while she leaned on his chest. A smiled pulled at her lips, when she felt lips on her forehead, and a hand playing with her hair.
Closing her eyes, she pressed herself closer to him. Hand sliding around his waist, she found an opening between his sweatpants and shirt.
⠀⠀- I love you, and I'm here if you need anything.
Killian was pressing kisses periodically on her forehead, humming quietly. Tangling his fingers in her hair, he pulled on the strands, pulling her face up. He dipped his head down, kissing her slowly, thoroughly. His tongue peeked out, licking her bottom lip, asking for entrance, entrance that she gave without second thoughts. They kiss, and kiss and kiss some more, taking their time to reconnect themselves after that horrible morning.
Curled up in her bed, the pillow that was usually Killian's tucked to her chest. She was listening to her favourite playlist on her phone, the one including the saddest songs that existed out there in the music industry. She missed Killian, so much it hurt to move without him with her. she was so used to be with him, all the time. They hadn't seen each others for the past 3 days, Killian had gone back to his place, trying to sort his thoughts. They haven't really been together for the past week, just quick meetings, but she wanted to cross the street and run back back to his arms. She knew he needed time, but she also wanted to be with him. She had lost someone dear to her too, but she couldn't really complain, could she now?
Pulling her phone from under her pillow, she swiped her thumb on the screen, unlocking it. She pressed on the text icon, then on her conversation with Killian. She typed a simple red heart, trying to gauge his mood. If she only got an emoji back, she knew he wasn't ready to see her, if she got anything else, she knew she could call him, or try to organise a meeting. When her phone chirped she smiled, the first real smile, and pressed the call button.
⠀⠀- Hey love.
Emma let out the breathe she has been holding in since she pressed the call button. She was so relieved, at least now she knew that he was doing ok, well maybe not okay, but at least he was coming back to her. He might not be ready to see her or be near anyone, but it was still something. She changed the direction of the conversation, asking random questions, being careful not to ask anything that could make him think of his brother.
They had started a new routine, one of them, usually Emma, would reach out for the other by sending them a silly emoji, and depending on what was his answer they would text for a while, or she would call him. Sometimes, though, he would be the one calling him, needing her to centre him, or helping him remember that he was not alone. Being away from him, was killing Emma. She was doing her best to let him lead, he needed to heal on his own terms. She couldn't force him to see anyone. It was simply hurting a bit more everyday, when she knew Killian and her dad had spend some time together in the past week. Maybe he needed to bond with his second male figure but still, Emma was his girlfriend, why didn't he want to spend time with her?
She wanted to change that. She would change it. She was in her room, listening to the same old tape, Killian had made her when they were 11 and her parents had told them how cute of a moment it had been for them back in the day. She smiled when their song came up, the one they would surely use for their first dance as husband and wife, Endlessly by Green River Ordinance.
Emma took her phone, clicking on the weather app to check when she would be able to plan her date. She wanted to make it memorable, and she needed to perfect weather for that. She smiled when her eyes landed on the sunny and slightly cloudy weather for Saturday and Sunday. She would be able to get her date planned earlier than she thought. She knew what she wanted to do, she just needed to see if his boat had still the all good before choosing to go on the water with it. She didn't want to create anymore stress. She sent a quick text to her dad, asking if he could check on the Jolly for her, and see if everything was alright. As soon as she got a positive text from his dad, she walked downstairs to talk to her mother about the whole thing. She needed to think what her mother would think of the idea.
Mary-Margaret had lost her dad when she was just a but younger that Emma and Killian were, but she was still the closest one to know what could help and what would not help Killian.
⠀⠀- Hey mom, do you think it's a good idea if I take Killian on a date, on his boat?
Nervously playing with her fingers, she was leaning on the doorway, looking exactly like the small girl who was insecure about herself. Mary-Margaret closed the gap between them, pulling her in a loving embrace. Emma closed her arms around her mom, feeling exactly like she did when Liam had told them he had to leave for the first time and her mom was trying to comfort her.
⠀⠀- I don't know Emma, do you think it's a good idea?
Murmuring against her hair, lips pressed on her skin. She felt her daughter sag against her, tightening her arms around her.
⠀⠀- I think we need to be together. He needs to get out of that house, or he'll never get out. I need to help him, and that's the only thing I can think of mom.
Emma looked up to her mom, tears running on her cheek. She brushed her hands hungrily against her cheek, not wanting to cry. She cried way too much already, she didn't think she had anymore tears in her system, but it looked like she was wrong. Her mom pressed her lips on her forehead, soothing her just with her presence.
⠀⠀- Then I think you should do it. As much as I know Killian, I don't know him as well as you. You've practically been attached by the hip since he arrived in the United States. If you think, deep down, that it is the right thing to do. From what he told me last me, and from what I've seen, you should do it. It would at least make him feel better and less like we're always watching his every move.
Emma smiled at her mother, before walking away. She had a date to plan, and it was a lot of work because she wanted it to be perfect. She knew how she wanted to end, but she did not know if Killian would be up for that, so she needed to make it memorable anyway.
Sending a quick text to Killian with the kind of outfit he had to wear and a time to meet her up in front of her house. When she got the thumb up emoji as an answer, she almost cried in happiness, she totally did the happy dance. She just needed to make sure everything was ready. She was not the best cook ever, so her best choice was to make easy snacks. Once everything was ready, she ran back into her room, jumping under the shower, and getting ready in the 20 minutes she had left.
She was running downstairs, putting everything she had made in the afternoon when she spotted Killian walking with easy steps. She smiled and waved at him, happiness pulling at her heart when she recalled the genuine smile he was sending her way. She jumped slightly, clapping her hands before she ran up to me, unable to stop herself. Killian was laughing, most likely at her, but she didn't care. She stopped when she was in front of him, before throwing herself at him, laughing when he grabbed her, spinning.
⠀⠀- God I missed Emma.
Emma hummed as a response, face nuzzled in his neck, pressing tiny kisses there. She stayed there for a little bit before just breathing him in, she had missed him so much. She was almost tempted to cancel her plans, and just dragged him to her room and cuddle.
⠀⠀- We should go, love, shouldn't we?
They arrived at the docks. Emma had been looking at Killian's face the whole ride there, trying to read his emotions. She was so excited for their date, but she would call it off at the smallest sign of sorrow or misery. Happy to see, Killian looked like he was mostly ok with their plan, she pressed a kiss to his cheek as soon as she pulled the car to a stop.
⠀⠀- It's been a while, but I thought it could be a good idea to go out on the water, but we don't have to.. It's your call, we can just go in and stay docked. I won't get mad or be disappointed, I just want to make you feel a little bit better.
Turning to face her, he smiled. Hand going to her cheek, he leaned in and kissed her slowly, just enjoying the feel of her lips on his. None of them tried to deepen the kiss, a simple sign that their time apart just made them respect the other more, and appreciate their relation even more. It proved to them, that they could simply enjoy the other without jumping them. Breaking the kiss, the got out of the car and walked to the ship, holding hands. Emma was smiling, happy to be back on their own sanctuary.
Emma went directly below deck, putting everything away if Killian decided to actually take them out on the water, she had learnt the hard way not to put anything on deck while navigating. She smiled at the memory, before walking back up, finding Killian behind the wheel, ready to take them out. Tears gathered in her eyes, the sight in front of her too much to handle. She smiled at him, staying put until they entered the free water, walking, okay practically running to him, arms going around his waist. They stayed in that position until he decided they were far away, and he lowered the anchor while Emma ran down to retrieve their snacks, and their usual blankets and pillows.
Killian came back to the main deck, watching Emma install everything for their cozy spot. He smiled, joining her, helping her with the blankets. They sit down, looking at each other, smiling shyly. Killian scratching behind his ear, Emma twirling her hair. They both felt like they were back on their first date, not knowing what to do. Laughing at them, Emma moved first, leaning in to kiss the tip of his nose. She had taken the basket with her, taking everything out of it as soon as she was sitting down again.
Emma knew they would have to talk about it, but she didn't want to be the one to approach the subject, so she just made small conversation, not really minding, because at least Killian was talking to her. They both enjoyed their snack, finishing every thing pretty quickly, before he asked her if they could sit out on the deck for a little bit, which Emma agreed to.
Putting everything back together, she sit down in between Killian's stretched legs, not wanting to be away. She leaned back on his chest, while he encircled her waist with his arms. She closed her eyes, letting herself be lulled into an almost slumber until her stomach growled, making Killian laughed. She blushed because they had just finished eating, pressing her hands on her stomach trying to muffle the sounds without any success, making him laugh harder. So much that he was clutching his side while leaning on his back, looking at the stars, realising they had spend a good amount of time on deck.
She turned around, on her knees and pinched his side for laughing at her face. He yelped like a baby, trying to get away but she was sitting on his legs, keeping him still.
⠀⠀- So, who's gonna laugh now?
Before she could pinch him again or tickle him, Killian had pulled her onto his chest, pressing his lips on hers. Successfully, shutting her mouths and well her thoughts. She wanted to stay in that bubble with Killian forever, and she hoped it was the beginning of his recovery, or at least the beginning of something good. Their kiss that had started sweet and slow had turned rapidly into something lustful and passionate. Panting, Killian broke the kiss and looked at her, smiling.
⠀⠀- We should probably go below deck, it's getting chilly.
Emma cleaned up everything above deck while she let Killian go bellow deck to prepare their bed. They used to sleep here quite often, but they hadn't done it lately and she had missed it. She finished putting their last pillow away, down, finding Killian in front of the desk there, shoulders down and shaking.
She walked up to him, stopping behind him, arms snaking around his waist, cheek pressed between his shoulder blades. She didn't say anything, just moved her fingers up and down his stomach, trying to get him to calm down. She couldn't see what had caused his breakdown, but whatever it was, was deep.
His breathing was all over the place, sniffling every so often and sobs were shaking his body. She pressed the length of her body on his, pressing her lips against his ear, trying to calm him down, murmuring simple thing, just to keep him focused on her.
⠀⠀- I've got you, just breathe my love.
Killian nodded slowly in response, he couldn't do more than that. She kept her movement going, asking him to follow her breathing and the way she was holding herself. She was glad to see him obey without questioning anything. She was pressing kissing on the back of his neck, stopping net when she saw what he had found.
She chocked on his name, when her eyes landed on the picture he was holding. It was Liam, Killian and herself, the first day they had spent together. She knew that picture existed, she just never thought she would find it here, and now. She smiled through her tears, trying not to breakdown either. She pressed her forehead on his shoulder, closing his eyes when she felt his hands squeezed hers, comforting her without disturbing the peace he had found back.
⠀⠀- I remember this day. It was our first play date, right?
Emma had murmured these words in his shirt, after she got her breathing back. She smiled when a wave of souvenirs came back to her. She bite back a laugh, pressing her face in his back. He moved before she could register what was happening, and she find herself pressing her face on his chest instead, closing her eyes. Her body sagged against his when he started playing with her hair. She tipped her head up, looking at him with a small smile.
⠀⠀- What do you need Killian?
⠀⠀- I don't know, Emma.. I… just.. make me forget, please.
His voice was breaking, and Emma did the only thing she could think off, and hugged him again. She pushed Killian on the bed, forcing him to sit down while Emma went to stand in front of him, between his thighs.
⠀⠀- Oh Killian..
She whispered, her heart breaking once again for the man in front of her. Wrapping him up in her embrace again, stroking her fingers through his hair. She was pressing kisses all over his face, forehead, cheek, eyelids, nose, jaw, ending up on his lips. She hugged him close to her heart, rocking him like a child to sooth him. When he lifted his head, his eyes were full of tears, and Emma couldn't help herself, but brush them away, pressing her forehead to his.
⠀⠀- Let me help you, babe.
Nodding, Killian helped his girlfriend move him on the bed, lying down. Before she could say something, he pulled her with him, pressing his lips to hers. Their tongues tangled greedily as he press herself into him, trying to forget everything but her, them. He groaned when he finally felt like the weight that was on his shoulder lifted and disappeared. Their kisses had never felt this right to him, teeth clanging, tongues dancing he was finally seeing the end of the tunnel. Her hands were moving in his hair, trying to pull him closer and her smiled, pressing back against her, while pulling away to take a breathe. They rested their forehead to one another as they both gasped for air. Killian opened his eyes, blue locking with green. She was able to read the disappointment in his eyes but she ease his expression by giving him a playful smile.
⠀⠀- Shh, I love you.
Moving her legs around his hips, sitting on his lap, she pressed her hands on his shoulder telling him without words. She smiled at him, dancing her finger on his cheek, trailing it down hid jawline and neck, curling her hands around the necklace he was wearing. She tugged on them, pulling his head up to meet hers. She brushed her lips on his, playing with his anticipation. If he needed her to make him forget, she would do her best to do so. She smiled, backing away when Killian tried to surge forward and kiss her. She took his hands in hers, moving them up to the pillow, pressing her weight on them.
⠀⠀- You, just lie down, I'll take care of you.
Their eyes met again and she leaned into him, cupping his jaw with both of her hands and bring his lips back to hers. Their mouth opened for each other, letting his tongue curl around hers, pulling it back into his mouth, sucking on it. She moaned quietly, trying not to lose herself in the kiss. She was the one supposed to comfort him, not the other way around. She pulled back, hands lingering on his cheeks. She pushed herself up, away from him.
⠀⠀- I love you so much.
Hands moving to his shirt, dancing her fingers over his firm stomach, his muscles shivering under her touch. She smiled, eyes still locked with his. As soon as she reached the bottom of the shirt he was wearing, she slide her hands under the material, pressing her finger in his skin pushing up and up, helping him sit to take it off.
Biting her lips, eyes roaming on the display of skin that was in front of her. God he was so handsome, she would never been able to get enough of him. Bending over, she pressed her lips to his collarbone, letting her tongue play with the bone there, running over it until Killian was moaning. His hands moved and before she could stop him, they were pressed on her hips, pulling him closer to where he seemed to need her the most. He core throbbed just thinking of what would happen if she played her cards correctly. She wanted it to happen now, she needed him to know it was okay, and it would get better as long as they were together. She just wanted to take care of him first, and since it would be their first time, it would be better if he came before.
She trailed her lips around his chest, closing her lips around his nipple, her hand flicking the other one, mimicking the motion with her tongue. His taste was intoxicating, making her go crazy, the more she got, the more she wanted. She ran her tongue up, through his chest hair, pressing a long kiss to his lips, bitting on his lip, pulling on it while breaking the kiss.
Her eyes were darker than usual, lust and love dancing in them while Killian was finally looking back as he used to a week and a half ago. She pressed another kiss to his lips before shuffling back on his leg, pressing on his shoulder to the mattress with her hands. Tongue playing on his skin, she stopped on the bone of his hip, sucking a mark there, rending him speechless and incoherent while her hands were busy unbuttoning his jeans. Before Killian was able to understand what was happening, her hand dove under his boxer brief, taking hold on his shaft, encircling it with her fingers.
She pressed her lips to his, starting to move her hand, up and down, up and down, making sure to add a wrist move each time she reached his tip, knowing how much he liked that. She felt him going slack under her, relaxing completely, finally letting his walls crumble. It was an awkward angle, but she made it work without too much difficulty. Killian was panting against on her lips, moaning and groaning incoherent things that could have been her name. Emma trailed kissed on his cheek and jaw, closing her lips around his lobe.
⠀⠀- Do you want my mouth on you? Do you want to feel my tongue runs around your tip? Do you want to fuck my mouth, until you don't have any other choice but come in my mouth?
She didn't give him a choice to verbally answer but the way his cock jumped in her hold was enough of an answer for her, and before he could do more than blinked, she was face to face with his splendid penis. Running her index above it, pressing it up and against his stomach, she scratched her nails through his chest hair, asking him to look at her.
⠀⠀- Watch.
She waited a dozen of seconds before running her tongue from root to tip, making sure to look at him, making him squirmed under her. She still had her hands on his root, holding his cock to his stomach. She ran her tongue on him multiple times until Killian was begging for her to take him in and that's what she did on her next lick, closing her lips around his tip, sucking hard on it. Killian mewled, hand flying to her hair, holding her to him. He wasn't forcing her movement just keeping her there, like he was afraid she would leave, but didn't he know she was just as addicted to the act that he was? maybe even more.
She curled her hands around his hips, pressing him on the bed, trying to make him understand he had to stay immobile if he wanted her to try what she wanted to try. Their eyes locked again and he nodded, his hand falling away from her hair. She licked his shaft, flicking her tongue on the tip, licking pre-cum. She hummed at his taste, licking her lips. Once she was sure he wouldn't move, she opened her lips, taking him back in, pushing him deeper than ever before. Throat opened, she swallow around him, easing the passage for him, she felt him brush the back of her throat and Killian growled, his hot seed bathing her throat. She swallowed every last drop of it, humming around him. She sucked him clean, pressing a last kiss to his tip, before crawling back up.
⠀⠀- Hi handsome.
She didn't have time to say anything else before Killian was kissing her, lips, tongues, teeth. She was trying to kiss him back, but between sucking him dry and kissing him she never had the chance to regain her breathe back. She broke the kiss to gulp some air before diving back for another kiss, or several. She was laying on him, body sprawled on his, hands in his hair. She broke the kiss again, pushing herself off of him, standing in front of the bed, before taking off her clothes. She stood there, in her matching underwear and bra, a lacy black number, smiling slightly, hoping not to look like a complete fool.
⠀⠀- You are a bloody marvel, Emma Swan, do you know that?
Her smile grew bigger, she let herself being pulled on the bed again, landing squarely on Killian. Giggling, she tried to calm herself, pressing her face in his chest, prompting Killian to laugh as well. She smiled, secretly happy to be able to make him laugh again. His hands were moving up and down her spine, causing goosebumps to run through her, feeling the fire she felt in her belly before, roared back to life. She pressed her body to his, before rolling them around, finding herself under him.
Legs wide opened, hands on his hips, she pulled him on her, giving him the permission he needed to connect their bodies so closely, the only barrier, her damp underwear. He was holding himself above her, with the help of his arms, biceps bulging out for her to admire. Fingers curled around his biceps, she smiled at him, not completely sure what she wanted to say. Her thoughts were erased as soon as she felt Killian move against her, his cock pressing right on her clit, making her whimper and pushed back up, pressing her core closer to him.
Her nails were digging in his skin, most likely hurting him but she couldn't help herself. She was feeling like her body was on fire, completely burning her. She needed more of that, she needed him inside her. Moving her hands, and pressing them against his cheek, she pulled him down, pressing their mouths together. Feeling his lips were moving against hers and it took her some time to realise he was whispering a constant train of "i love you" and her name. She smiled, opening her mouth wider and sucking his bottom lip in between hers.
⠀⠀- God, Killian, you feel so good.
She had no idea what was passing her lips, but she knew it was a good thing because Killian was moving faster, pressing harder on her and she felt herself losing control of everything in her body. She was so close, but she didn't want to come like this, not that she thought she was ready to have him make love to her, but she wanted to feel him, skin to skin. She kept her hips moving for a little while longer, enjoying the sparks of electricity created by their motions.
It wasn't enough, she needed more and Killian seemed to read her thoughts. He pushed himself up and off of her, delving his hand down, pulling her underwear off, while she arched her back and took her bra off, throwing it away. She was lying in a bed, completely naked, in front of her boyfriend for the first time. She felt the urge to cover herself, but her eyes locked with his, and the way his eyes lit up like a freaking Christmas tree was enough for her to feel confident again.
Holding her hand up for him to take, she pulled him down again. Legs opening even wider to accommodate him, giving him more space to fit. Head thrown back, moaning a long sounds that could have been his name. Hands shooting to his hips, pulling him closer. She was dying inside, finally feeling him against her. Core throbbing, heart pumping and panting she was trying not to lose herself to fast. She wanted to enjoy all the sensation she was feeling right now.
⠀⠀- Oh God, Killian, that feel so good.
Killian groaned at her, nuzzling his head in her neck, breathing her in. He was so close and yet so far to where he so desperately wanted to be. His thrusts were long and sharp, like he knew what her was doing instead of it being his first time. Emma knew they were playing with fire, but she couldn't make herself stop, or pausing to do anything else. Hands sliding down his back, she grabbed his ass, squeezing the globes, forcing him to pressed harder on her, making her whimper in delight. Undulating her hips with his, she felt herself became wetter and wetter by the seconds. Several hard thrusts, Emma was screaming out her first orgasm, calling out Killian's name.
She fell back on the bed, trying to get her breathing back. She could feel how Killian was still hard, just rocking against her, knowing she was most likely over-sensitive. She smiled lazily at him, locking her arms around his neck, pulling him down to her, pressing a sweet kiss to his lips.
⠀⠀- Don't think we're done, Mister. I want to feel you inside me.
Killian chocked on his breath, laughing awkwardly, not that he didn't want to, he had never expected Emma to be so open with her wants and needs but who was he to deny her. Lips locked in what Emma had intended to be a soft kiss turned into a battle of tongues, they both reached in different directions for the same thing it seemed when they both came back to there other, holding a silver package in their hands. Giggling at their antics, Emma let hers drop to the bed, before helping Killian with it. Killian looked down at her, asking permission because as much as he wanted to claim her as his, he would never force himself on her.
⠀⠀- God, just get inside me! Emma panted, legs sprawling wider, body shaking. Please, Killian.
Emma had just finished her sentence that she felt him rock into her, just the tip but she already felt like her body was splitting in two. She had no idea if she could handle more than that. Hands closing in fists around the sheet on the bed, head thrown back in a moan. Killian knew it would hurt, but he wasn't completely sure at what point it would happen, he just knew it was going to happen.
Her feet flat on the bed, she pushed her hips up, taking him a bit deeper inside her, because that wonderful, amazing idiot had to stop himself just at the point where it was hurting her. Killian moved with her, and her moved that much deeper forcing her body to stretched for him. Killian was starting to move back, when Emma hands flew to his ass, keeping him where he was. Her eyes clamped shut, she was trying to breathe through the discomfort because it was not really hurting her, it wasn't feeling good. Killian pressed his body down on her, murmuring sweet words into her skin, kissing her shoulder.
⠀⠀- Emma, you feel so good.
She felt her body relax under his, letting go of her hold on his butt. She moved her hips slightly, brows pulled together in a frown while she was looking for any discomfort. She opened her green eyes, looking at the man above her, pushing her hips against him, smiling. She gave him a nod, hand moving to his cheek. He took that as a permission to rock slowly, and Emma was mewling for him. She was already approaching her peak. Back arched, head thrown back on his name, hand clutched around his neck and back, nails digging into his skin, probably scarring him. They moved together as if it was a dance they had practiced forever. Their lips touched, tongue tangling, teeth clanging together, breathless but not ready to let go of the other. Emma was flying, not feeling anything but Killian, she had no idea where her body ended and where his started. All she could think about was him, and them, and how much more she wanted.
Moving on instinct, she moved her legs up, locking them around his hips, whimpering when Killian reached deeper inside her, pressing against all of her sensitive spots. She was feeling every delicious inches of him, squeezing him with her inner muscles making him growl. She was definitely getting off with the sounds he was making, it was giddy to know it was because of her.
⠀⠀- Please, tell me you're close.
Hearing Killian's voice that broken and miserable pushed Emma closer to her release. She just needed a bit more, and before she had time to think of what she was doing, her own hand slide down her own body, reaching her clit easily and flicking it. She nodded, opening her eyes to lock them with his. She wanted to see him fall over the edge, joining him in his climax. His thrusts became erratic, loosing the perfect rhythm they had. She squeezed her muscles every time he dove back in and in no time, Killian was shooting her name out loud, pushing her over the edge as well. It was as if she would never see the end of her high, joining Killian in their perfect bubble.
Telling him to settle under the blanket, she joined him right after turning off the lights off. Her head on his shoulder, an arm around his waist, Emma was breathing him in. Eyes closed, she turned her head, pressing a kiss just above his heart. She whispered a simple "i love you" against his skin, as if she was talking directly to his heart.
She wanted to stay here with him, just enjoying their moment away from everything. She moved a bit closer to him, her leg above his, pressing herself as close to him as she humanly could. She needed to be close to him, physically close, to get Killian to listen to her. She closed her eyes, took a deep breathe and.
⠀⠀- Can we talk about Liam, love?
The breathe she just took in, left her as fast as it had arrived, making her tensed rapidly before she forced herself to relax against him. She nodded her head slowly, trying not to jostle him, because she knew that if she moved to much, or looked up to him, he would close himself again and that was the last thing she wanted.
The hand that was around his waist slide up, stopping above his heart, pressing her face on it. She was hiding her own tears that way, and even if she knew he would get that she was crying, he had the choice to acknowledge it, because it was not that obvious. She felt his arms around her moved and squeezed her tighter, and a small smile stretched her lips.
⠀⠀- I miss him, Em.. But it's not different from before, ya know?
The only respond he got, was the was her hand flexed on his skin, letting him know she had heard him. He knew he was talking pretty low, but he couldn't make himself talk louder. He never thought he would have to talk about Liam like that, but he needed to.
⠀⠀- I don't know how I feel, mostly I feel guilty because I don't feel differently, than before you know? because he wasn't here.. He hasn't been here for so long, that it isn't real for me now. and I hate myself for not feeling the way I should, because he's my brother.
His voice broke at the end of the word, letting her know he was very close to have another breakdown. Emma could not not do anything, she pushed herself up, using the hand that was on his chest to stay up and above him. She pressed her free hand on his cheek, brushing the tears away. She was soothing him as best as she could, without words.
⠀⠀- Babe, you are allowed to feel whatever you feel. Nobody is judging you, or expecting you to feel a way or another. You deserve to be loved, and I am here to do that. I am here, with you, for everything we'll have to go through. You are not alone, never.
She dipped her head so slowly, it was like time stopped around them, giving him the choice to stop her, which he didn't. He pressed his lips against her, humming lowly from the back of his throat. She broke the kiss, her forehead pressing against his. She smiled at him, touching the tip of his nose with hers. She was looking at him, love shining in her eyes for him to see.
⠀⠀- You know, Killy.. I get it, it's hard and you don't know what to do, but think of what Liam would tell you? I can try but we both know I'm not really good with words, at least as good as you and your brother. I wish I could do more, than that, but I have no idea what you need, and in these moments I would always send an email to Li, asking what I should do because as much as I know you, he knew you better than anyone. Liam was not only your brother, he was the only family member left that you had. I will do my very best to help you get better, Killian, because it's you and me. It's always gonna be you and me.
Killian blinked and Emma did not have time to do more than take a breathe before his lips were closing on hers. She pushed her hands under his head, holding him up and against her lips. She kept the kiss going, moving her lips around, tilting her head on the side, opening her lips to let his tongue join hers. A moaned broke free from her thread and Killian smiled, being her usual Killian again. If she had to kiss him to get her Killian back, then so be it, she would.
—
So here it is, the official end of their adventure. You might have some chapters in the future about Killian and Emma trying new things together, but I don't promise anything.
x, lex.
