Vicissitude - Volume One, Chapter Nine
Don's eyes widened at her words. "You're..."
April gestured him towards his desk, where another small, white test sat. He moved to it, picking it up swiftly. His eyes searched it up and down.
Two lines.
He grabbed at the box, lying on his desk, also, reading fervently. Two lines yes, one line no. He read over it again. Two lines yes, one line no. His gaze moved to the stick in his hands again. Two lines, unmistakable in their brightness.
"How can this be?" He wondered aloud, then looked at her. She shrugged her shoulders, biting her lip. "Sometimes the tests are wrong..." She looked down at her hands. "False negative."
He sighed, looking back at the test. His heart buzzed at the sight before him. He didn't know what to think. He was scared, yes. Angry, also. But part of him... was relieved. And, dare he even think it: happy.
"Don, what are we going to do?" April's voice brought him out of his reverie.
He put the test down, walking back to her. Bringing his arms around her, he hugged her close. "Did you buy another test?" He asked, and breathed in when he felt her nod her head. "Well, then we'll take that one. Tomorrow. And then..." He sighed softly. "We'll go from there."
"Morning April!" Mike's voice boomed across the room, almost making her jump. Her mind was not her own today; she'd just left her room for the morning, after sneaking out earlier in the day to get to the bathroom and take the last test she'd bought. She couldn't wait to take 'just one more', and the few minutes it took to process were excruciating at best. Seeing the results were something that made her both anxious, and scared out of her wits.
Now, she had to tell Don.
Walking into the doorway of the kitchen, she stopped and observed the family before her. Mike smiled at her, then dug into his waffle.
"Good morning, April." Leo said, and both Raph and Don stopped their conversation to look at her. Don smiled softly at her, catching her eye. She nodded slightly, and the smile froze on his face. Leo looked from Don to April, a frown forming.
Mike looked around the room, as an unsettled feeling cast itself over the group. "What's going on...?"
April cleared her throat. "Donnie, I think I need your help with this program I'm working on. Can you come take a look when you're done eating?" She raised her eyebrows.
Don grabbed his napkin, dabbing his mouth quickly. "I'll come have a look now." He said, standing and grabbing his dish. Setting it in the sink, he followed her out of the kitchen, and into his own room before speaking.
"A nod." He turned to her, putting his hands on her shoulders. "What does a nod mean?"
She looked down, unable to face him when she spoke. "It means," She sighed. "It means I'm pregnant." Saying the words aloud, her voice caught, and tears formed in her eyes. "It means it worked. It worked. He... that... man... implanted me." Tears ran down her cheeks, and she felt him draw her to him.
"I'm so sorry, April." He soothed softly, running a hand over her hair. "I truly am. I'm so sorry I couldn't... help you. I'm sorry." He buried his face in her hair, and she could feel his warm breath on her, and the wetness of his own tears. He gasped in softly, and she put her hands to his face without looking up.
"I don't blame you, Donnie." She said, but her voice went flat. One of her hands went immediately to her stomach, touching it lightly.
"We have to tell them." Don said quietly, kissing the side of her head. "Want to do it soon? Get it over with..."
"Like ripping off a band aid." April joked flatly.
"Anyone else find that all a bit... abrupt?" Raph tapped his fork on his plate.
Leo cleared his throat gently. "Well, slightly..." Raph snorted at that, and Leo turned to him in a glare.
"Slightly my ass, Leo." Raph shot back. "Somethin's up." He went to stand, but Leo was faster.
"Nothing is 'up'." Leo got out as Raph snorted. "And you know that for a fact...?" Raph replied dryly.
Leo pressed his hands against the table, meeting Raph's eyes steadily. When he didn't answer right away, Raph laughed roughly. "You don't know shit." He grunted, ignoring Mike's sigh. Instead, he headed towards the door, calling back over his shoulder: "I'm gettin' to the bottom of this."
Mike stood up then, and, without a look to him, Leo stormed out after Raph. They got to the middle of the living room before the door to Don's room opened and he and April came out.
"Just who we were lookin' for." Raph said, stopping them both in their tracks. They glanced at each other briefly, the look not missed by Raphael.
"What's going on?" April looked from Raph to Leo, then over to Mike.
"That's what we want to know." Raph said. "I know somethin's goin' on, and I wanna know what."
With another glance at April, Don sighed. "Guys. We need to talk." He motioned to Mike and looked at Leo.
Mike moved to the couch, while Leo opted to sit on the arm of the chair. "Is something wrong, Don?" He asked cautiously.
Looking at April, Don opened his mouth to speak, but she held her hand up to stop him. "Guys..." She began, looking down and biting her lip. After a moment she licked her lips, hugging herself tightly. "Guys, I'm... I'm pregnant." She let it out in a whoosh.
"Whoa." Mike breathed.
Don dared a glance in the only direction he was brave enough to: Leo's eyes were wide, and flew to his own a split second later. Don looked away just as quickly; his brother's gaze burning into his own.
"And Don knew?" Raph looked uncertain now, as if unsure how to react. April nodded.
"Does Casey?" Mike shot out without thinking, making April blush.
"Mikey!" Leo admonished just as quickly, standing and turning to April. Shaking his head apologetically, he moved to take her hands in his own.
"Holy shit." Raph exclaimed. All eyes turned to him, but he stared only at the woman before them. "Does Casey know?" He asked. When she hesitated, he shook his head. "It's Don's, isn't it?" He turned to his brother. "Donnie..."
Don swallowed hard, rubbing the back of his neck nervously. "Ah, in a sense..."
Raph didn't wait for the rest of the sentence. "Jesus Christ." He spit out. "Casey was right." He looked at Don. "How long's this been goin' on?" He demanded. "How long've you been fu-"
"Raphael!" Leo interrupted, eyes blazing. "This is not the time for..."
"Oh, this is the perfect time, Leo. In case ya ain't noticed..." He gestured to the bewildered pair beside him. "The biggest cat I ever seen just came outta the fuckin' bag. And this is 'not the time'?!"
"It's not like that, Raph." Don tried again, weakly, but his brother rounded on him.
"Christ, Don. Ya couldn't keep your fuckin' dick in your shell?" Don winced at the words, but Raph continued. "You know how many times Casey'd come to me and ask me about this an' I'd defend you and her both." He scowled harshly. "You know how stupid that makes me look?"
"Raph, please..." April pleaded, tears brimming in her eyes.
"Ya couldn't have the decency to break it off with him... At least tell him."
"There was nothing to tell, you ignorant ass!" April got out finally, her voice rising enough to stop Raphael's rant; his words dying in his throat. He looked at her, shocked.
"I was raped." She yelled out, voice breaking and wavering; dangerously on the verge of collapse. "In that cell...Bishop implanted me." Her body shook, trying to regain control as her words spit from her mouth. "While I was unconscious... He raped me of my will so that he could dissect what came of it!" She was uncontrolled now, but didn't care. Her hair plastered itself against her wet cheeks, and a sob escaped her. "Are you happy? Your goddamn pride is untouched."
The room filled with silence broken only by her soft sobs. Leo moved to her side, and she collapsed against him, crying into his neck.
"Fuck." Raph let out, finally. "Bishop?"
"Happy now?" Don asked angrily, looking at his brother. "Now that you've overreacted and acted like a complete..."
"Hey!" Raph shouted. "Don't you..."
"Both of you shut up." Leo hissed over April's shoulder. "What is wrong with you?" Don grimaced at this, scowling heavily, pushing past Raph and walking out the door.
Mike moved over to April, kneeling in front of her. Grabbing her hips, he moved her to face him gently. "Wow," He breathed, eyes on her stomach. "A baby." He looked up at her. "No better mommy than one who's taken care of us forever." He grinned.
"Oh, Mikey." She got out, putting her hands on his shoulders. He stood, hugging her quickly.
Raph let out a growl. "Jesus, April..." He looked down, his fists clenched tightly at his sides. "I'm an asshole." He looked up at her then, and she nodded plaintively. "Yes, you are."
His eyes widened momentarily, and he clenched his jaw. "I just can't fuckin' get it right." He ground out, rubbing a hand roughly over his face. A hand on his arm stopped him, and he looked up to find April standing before him.
"I'm angry, too." She whispered, placing her hand on his face. "I want to scream," She continued, "To hit something." She bit her shaking lip, her wet eyes meeting his own.
"Then hit me." He replied huskily.
She shook her head, swallowing hard. She backed up, eyes on his, until she reached Leo again, who put his hands back on her shoulders. "It's not the answer, Raph." She whispered.
"We'll figure it out." Leo kneaded her shoulders gently. She brought a hand up to cover one of his own appreciatively.
"Fuck 'figuring it out'!" Raph exploded. "I wanna do something." He pushed past the couch, stalking over to the door and slammed it shut behind him. He barreled through the sewers, stopping after a few minutes to let out a roar of frustration. It echoed throughout the passages, making his own ears ring.
"Sounded like it felt good."
Raph whipped around at the voice, sai drawn. In a shadow across the way, he saw a slight movement. "Donnie?" He took a step towards the passage. His brother's form came into dark focus; sitting on the ground, knees pulled up to his plastron. Don looked up at Raph, face miserable and angry looking.
"Leo send you after me?"
Raph scowled. "Leo didn't say nothin' to me."
"Then what do you want?" Don's voice was both annoyed and exhausted; angry with his brother, but exasperatedly on the verge of tears.
"I..." Raph faltered.
"Did you kill Bishop?" Don interrupted. When Raph looked at him, his eyes were locked on the ground. "Because if you didn't," He continued. "That child won't be safe."
Anger flared in Raph, but he forced himself to sheath his weapons. "Don..." He sighed, dropping down heavily next to his brother. "Christ, I don't know." He muttered, running a hand over his head. "I didn't see him when we were there. We just wanted to find you."
Don squeezed his eyes shut, hanging his head.
"Donnie..." Raph tried again. "I'm sorry. I didn't know."
"No, you didn't." Don cried out. "You have no idea, but you still assumed. You don't know what happened there, what they did... All you thought you knew was that it was my fault."
"I'm an idiot, Don!" Raph exploded. "Is that what you want to hear?" He jumped up, pacing back and forth. "I overreact. I assume. I act like a fuckin' prick."
"You are a prick, Raph!" Don's outburst silenced Raph momentarily. "You're so concerned about how you look to Casey, that you don't even care..."
"Oh, I care." Raph sneered. "Don't you ever tell me I don't."
"Then act like it! Don't make me feel worse than I already do!" Don's voice broke, then softened. "I won't be able to take it. Not after everything."
"Donnie..." Raph stopped pacing, standing above his brother. "What did they do to ya?" He crouched down before him, putting a hand on his shoulder, his voice softening slightly. "I mean, besides..." He shrugged slightly "...the baby... What happened?"
Don shook his head wordlessly. "That baby isn't even mine." He muttered mournfully.
Raph looked taken aback. "But... I thought you said..."
Don's eyes remained glued to the ground, a finger tracing through the dirt. "Bishop wanted a 'specimen'..." He spit the word out. "Of us. I... couldn't deliver, so he used parts of his own DNA to fill in the gaps."
Raphael leaned back on his heels, confused. "Donnie, I don't get all your techno babble, here..." He trailed off when his brother's eyes moved up to meet his own.
"No matter how much we wondered about our ability to mate with a human, I, at least, don't have that option to wonder anymore." He looked back down, tears filling his eyes. "I am sterile, Raph. So no matter what happens, I will never have that opportunity without the help of others."
Raphael breathed in deeply, lost for words. He wasn't sure what bothered his brother more: the baby itself, or how it came to be, not being his. Not knowing what to say, he leaned forward, putting a hand on Don's shoulder. "Hey..." He whispered, squeezing Don's shoulder gently. When his brother looked up at him, he grinned softly. "Ya got the chance now, Donnie, no matter the circumstance." When Don's face fell even more, he frowned. He didn't know his brother's pain; had no way to alleve it. He looked away. his mind wrapping around that knowledge, fighting away the wave of rage that threatened to break forth.
A small sound stole his attention, and he looked back to his brother. Don pulled his legs closer to his plastron, forehead on his knees. Tears dripped from his eyes, meeting the ground, mixing with the dirt there. Another small sob left him, and suddenly Raph reached for him, putting a hand on his neck, pulling him forward until their foreheads met. He closed his eyes against the sounds of his brother's tears, each cry igniting a fire burning deep within him, screaming for him to do something. To react.
But all he could do, was hold on.
