Hey guys, so this chapter is going to be a bit different as it's going to be in Dave's perspective than Dirk's.
But hey, here's Rose and some information in here. That's good, right? Well, here it is! Enjoy! :D
IX
Change
"So Dave, when were you going to tell me about your brother's development with his cellmate?"
Dave rolls his eyes and scoffs. "Ugh, there is no way I'm telling you about Dirk's love life. It's not even ironic."
Of course, Rose giggles.
"You think I wouldn't figure out? Roxy doesn't keep secrets very well when she's drunk."
"She's always drunk."
"I beg to differ." Rose answers with one of her cocky smiles. "She has her eyes on someone. She's nice and in my opinion, she'll be good for Roxy."
Dave raises an eyebrow and looks at Rose. "She found someone? Finally got over Dirk?"
Of course, Dave only gets a glimpse of Rose who isn't a complete therapist troll. Rose returns to her smirking, weird-tentacley therapist troll side.
"Of course," She answers. "And this one we both can trust. Actually, she's a sister of a friend of ours."
Dave sits up from the ironically comfortable therapy couch and blinks at Rose.
She rolls her eyes. "Don't worry, David, this friend isn't a spy. He was simply the son of one of my Mom's exes."
"Oh come on Rosey, you got to tell me more about this friend of yours." Dave ironically whines out. "At least tell me if it's the friend that made you meet Kanaya."
Dave immediately smirks as he sees Rose blush. Of course, the fashionable lesbian known as Kanaya Maryam is Rose's weakness. Dave has met Kanaya and she's polite. She's also an ironic human-vampire who drinks blood and wields a chainsaw near her all the time. That ironically means she's perfect for Rose.
"Alright, it is the same friend." Rose answers and then smirks. "Should I introduce him to you?"
Dave rolls his eyes and lays back on the ironic therapy couch. "Nah, I'm just ironically single –not desperate."
Rose fake sighs. "How sad, you two could have been in a committed relationship."
"I'm a Strider, Lalonde. Striders have high ironic standards. And I don't want a guy introduced by you."
Rose giggles. "I'm sorry, it was only a little experiment. I didn't think you could make Equius sweat that much."
Dave easily gives her the finger, specifically the ironic middle finger.
"And really, I'm surprised you're not doing your weird tentacle therapy to find out what's fucking wrong in my life."
Rose hums and leans on her ironic therapy chair. "Csonka was transferred to another prison and later was found dead three weeks he entered. From the photography, it's most likely work from the English."
"Warten, A Keksz is dead? Already?"
"Mutilated too. I guess he had an ironic death as his head had been cracked in various areas."
Dave blinks and then narrows his eyes. Rose has more information. But she's not sharing…
Dave sneers at Rose who is smiling "innocently." He knows what she wants. She knows that he knows. But Dave isn't going to give any information now. He has ironic pride in him.
"So, how's the weather out there?" Dave ironically asks.
"It's alright, David." Rose answers with a "cherry" smile. "So tell me, how's Dirk? Roxy can't visit this time because of a mission."
Dave thinks and sighs. "He's… changing…"
"Changing…?"
Dave shrugs his shoulders. "Just like you want to know, Dirk got close with his new cellmate. Name's Jake English."
"English?"
"Dirk doesn't suspect him to be one of those English and the psycho got here for a failed attempt for murder." Dave sighs again. "He's weird and chews his fingers way too damn much…"
"Really?" Rose then hums. "Why say they're close when he could have gotten a subordinate like usual?"
"Actually, he didn't this time." Dave says as he remembers and still can't believe what ironically happened. "Turns out, they became friends. They call each other by their first name –English calls me Strider still."
Rose doesn't looks satisfied at the answer and frowns at Dave. Dave hears Rose shuffling some papers.
"…Jake English, attempted murder…" Rose says out. "…He had beaten and abused a numerous amount of therapists. I was given an opportunity to analyze –they even offered me a seemingly unbelievable sum of money… Are you sure Dirk isn't being manipulated or abused?"
Dave scoffs and sits up. He glares directly at Rose.
"Fuck. Nein." Dave answers brashly.
Rose blinks in surprise.
"Look, I may not like the psycho fucker that much –but he's fucking helping Dirk. That fucker got Dirk better than the five fucking useless years in a shithole with amateur manipulating assholes. Dirk is expressing himself. He is showing emotions. He's not emotionless –a human robot. He's not being this… this thing where he would see everything being fucked up." Dave growls out. He points at Rose with anger. "I don't care how fucked up English is, he isn't hurting Dirk and you can't hurt him."
Rose blinks at him a couple of times before smiling.
"You really do care about him…"
Dave rolls his eyes and groan. He falls back on the ironic therapy couch.
"Of course I do, Lalonde. Seriously, that's your response to my ironic confession to my bro's love life. And yeah… He's my bro and bros stick together –especially since we're ironic twin bros." Dave answers. "We may be hella different but we're bros till the end. And I want Dirk to be… better."
Rose frowns. "I thought Roxy told me that Dirk is getting better. Was my sister lying? Or did Dirk lying to her?"
"Of course he lied. He lies to everyone." Dave retorts. "Do you really think that Arschloch is going to reveal what he's really feeling? He's always on fucking guard and says everything is fine when he's not."
"And what makes you think that he isn't lying like usual?"
Dave tenses at first but then relaxes. He chuckles and puts his hands behind his head.
"He didn't say anything. His face and body shows differently and did the ironic "talking" for him." He answers. "He has this resting bitch face now. Like back then, he would always have this ironic resting bitch face when we were working. When we got here, he… didn't have it –or anything really… He would just stare out in space as if life is nothing but non-ironic B.S.
"And then English sticks to him and the ironic resting bitch face is coming back –and now he's showing actual emotions too! He is actually talking about shit. He isn't always talking about the mission or his weird ass status of doing mission with some calls and shit. He's talking about shit! Like today, he was talking about this shitty movie he thought was ironic, how shitty the food is, how shitty I am, and other shit that I can't fucking remember now!"
"And?"
Of course, Rose wants to hear more. But what the hell, she was going to get it anyway.
"He's being an ironic sarcastic asshat! He's actually making shitty jokes! He's showing that he's this annoying dipshit of a bruder that I have to live with than this empty… thing that got in prison. He was like that ever since…"
"Ever since your uncle's and his husband's death…" Rose talks out. "I get to see him in the previous you guys were in… He was trying to recover from the shock and rom what I theorized, he wanted to escape and recover with revenge. He wants to kill the rest of the Midnight Crew in order to "recover" from his trauma but he couldn't."
"I should have drove better…" Dave grumbles out. "Then he couldn't have–"
"No, that hasn't been your fault." Rose interrupts. "The car crash was at fault, not your driving."
"Then why did Dirk have the jacket? Huh! He got batshit crazy because I–"
"Because he thought he was going to lose you too, Dave!" Rose snaps. "I was there with Roxy when he was in that room, Dave. He wasn't angry because of what you did. He was devastated because he almost lost you, too."
Rose scowls at Dave. Dave doesn't know what to say. Is that why Dirk was in that jacket when they first got here…? Dave didn't know that…
Rose stops scowling and sighs. "Look, I know we have this complex rivalry with each other but Roxy and I do care about you guys. You're great partners in the missions and perhaps we care about you two way too much than we need…"
Dave gives her a ghost of a smile. "Vielen Dank, Lalonde…"
Rose gives out a bigger smile. "Your welcome, Strider… You can sit back down and tell me more of how much Dirk has changed with this English man."
Dave follows her request and shrugs his shoulders.
"Oh? Now you wanna know about my bro than me?"
Rose giggles. "Well, I am curious of why you don't want to meet my friend. He seems to be your type. Perhaps you took a liking to someone already? Perhaps English?"
Dave immediately makes a sour face and a disgusted blech. "Ugh! Fuck no! English is so not my type! You should know my type and standards is this cute next door neighbor –with some nice blue eyes, of course."
Rose giggles again. But she isn't saying anything.
So Dave will just continue talking about his bro.
"So back to my bro, Dirk. Dirk was like this –this non-ironic robot when he got out of the room… And now, he flips me off and say a cheesy ironic joke to me and English. Really, English would say a bunch of weird bullshit and Dirk would respond to him by either agreeing or responding with something ironically positive. Dirk would ironically watch a movie with English. He would eat his lunch with me and English. He would calm English down when he's having those weird fits. And Scheiße, my bro has done a lot with English…"
"It sounds like your brother is fancying his cellmate, Dave."
Dave tenses and clamps his mouth shut. He narrows his eyes and thinks. No, it can't be. But can it…?
And then he figures it out.
"…Well Scheiße, my bro wants English's ass…"
"His ass?"
"Was? English may be a psycho but he has an ass."
"So, you brother has finally took an interest."
"Warten, finally?"
"Your brother is a professional manipulator so of course he isn't going to trust many people –or meet anyone new in general. He expects them to try to manipulate him. Even with Roxy's help, Dirk was too… distrustful to even develop an interest in any man."
Dave can't protest that. Because Dirk is always on the missions on getting information from someone, manipulating and tricking them into thinking that Dirk cares about them. And karma is karma. Dave wouldn't be surprised if Dirk got his heart broken because of some jackass who wants some information –but Dave will definitely torture that asshole as long as he can.
But Dave isn't so sure about English.
English is a psycho. There's no other way to say it. English is not mentally stable in any way and the fucker can be too unpredictable. Dave has gotten some harm done from him but… Jake didn't hurt Dirk from what he sees… And English is an honest psycho at least and always helping and caring Dirk in his own weird psycho way…
And even though English is a psycho, he's not abusive to Dirk…
Dirk has been recovering, recovering quicker and faster with English…
When Dave saw the way Dirk just took Hearts Boxcars's head and stuck it in a spear in front of so many witnesses, Dave knew he couldn't leave him alone. That's why he immediately killed Clubs Deuce and made sure he got "caught" in the act. Deuce was an annoying piece of shit. And Dave definitely had to get caught. Dave had to be there for Dirk…
That's what bros do for each other.
But if English is helping Dirk recover… helping him change back who he used to be…
"Sure, why the fuck not." Dave says as he shrugs his shoulders.
Well, Dave will definitely tell English about Dirk's weeaboo phase when they're finally fucking and ironically dating.
"So Dave, are you sure you don't want to meet my friend?"
Dave rolls his eyes.
"Bitte, I wouldn't fall for a friend of yours –even if he became my cellmate and flutter some ironic blue doe eyes at me."
I hope everyone had a great Thanksgiving Day. For those who had family members, hopefully you guys didn't have a fight with anyone. For those who had a fight with at least one family member, remember that a group of people have diverse opinions about things and it's natural that you can't always agree with things. And for those who were insulted in the Thanksgiving dinner, you are not a failure and you have loved ones (even if they didn't show it at the dinner).
Well, the next chapter is going to be the last one and then I'm going to complete this fanfiction and focus on others.
So thanks for reading and please review. See you guys in the last chapter! Bye!
