Hi guys, I am back. Sorry for the delay. Life got in my way. Anyway, thanks for reading, following and sharing your thoughts. So, here is the next chapter. I hope you like it. And like always, you are welcome to tell me what you think. Enjoy.
T73.
xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
Jane enters the autopsy room and takes a deep breath. "Hey."
Maura glances over her shoulder and smiles a little. "Hi. How is Frankie doing?"
"Not so good." the Italian replies. "Frost's still calming him down. What do you have?"
"I found skin particles under Stella's finger nails. The lab runs test already."
Jane nods. "Cause of death?"
"Strangulation."
Jane eyes the dead woman and shakes her head. "It's such a shame. Ma really liked Stella as Frankie and she were together. She always told him that Stella would be a good catch. And now look at her."
"When did they broke up?" the blonde ask.
"Shortly they gratitude academy." Jane answers and furrows her eyebrows. " They barely saw each other after they started to work for the police."
Maura puts off her gloves and glance questioningly at her wife. "In the same police department?"
Jane clasps her hands together in front of her and raises her shoulders briefly. "Yeah, but not in the same district. They drifted apart."
Maura licks her lips and sighs. "That's really sad."
"Yeah," the Italian agrees. "especially because Ma blamed our job. She always said that we won't be able to keep the right person if we are already married to our work."
Maura chuckles and raises her eyebrows. "Well, you proved her that she was wrong."
A small smile plays around Jane's lips. "Yeah." she furrows her eyebrows. "What about this ger ..."
"Garrote?" Maura asks with a smile.
Jane nods once. "Yes. Is it the murder weapon?"
Maura takes a deep breath. "I compared the wire with the marks on her neck, and I can tell that it is the murder weapon."
"Why did the killer left the wire at the crime scene?" Jane mumbles. She looks at Maura and frowns. "Could you also fund skin on the wire? I mean, beside Stella's."
"The lab already exams it." Maura answers and puts on her white lab coat.
Jane frowns deeply. "Uh ... Maura?"
The smaller woman smiles at her wife. "Yes?"
"You wanted ... to talk to me about something." Jane says hesitantly.
The smile on Maura's lips vanishes again. "Yes, please come with me in my office."
Jane follows her wife into her office and closes the door behind her. "If this is about the fact that I let pee Jo Friday in the yard ... I am really sorry."
Maura takes a deep breath and is silent for a moment. It's like she is considering her next words. "You remember that we have started the procedure of artificial insemination?"
Jane furls her eyebrows. "Um ... Yes, that's hard to forget. Several eggs were taken from me."
"You are also aware that the oocytes get inseminated outside of the body before they are implanted in the woman? In our case in me."
"Yes. Yes, I am aware of the fact. I was there too. Maura, what is this about?"
Maura clings with her hand to the back of her designer office chair. "As you know, I was yesterday at a appointment at my gynecologist's practice."
Jane nods slowly and furrows her eyebrows. "Yes, but I couldn't come with you because Korsak and I had to arrest an killer and Frost was in court."
Maura takes a deep breath and swallows hard. "Jane, it turns out that I am pregnant."
Jane's jaw hits the floor and she stumbles a little backwards, staring at her wife like she had lost her mind.
She asks herself if she has heard right or if her brain is playing tricks on her.
They just tried it one time. It can't be true that it worked out. Other couples tries it for several months or even years.
And they just need one shot? What the hell?
She blinks a couple of times. "Did you just say that you are pregnant?"
Maura chews nervously on her bottom lip. "Yes."
"But ..." Jane is stammering. "But we only tried it one time."
Maura raises her eyebrows and shrugs. "Sometimes just one try is all it needs."
Jane let the words sink in and her eyebrows shoot up high. All of a sudden she starts to beam happily. "Are you really pregnant?"
Maura starts to breath again and nods. "Yes, I am really pregnant."
Jane walks over to the blonde and hugs her carefully like she is embracing an fragile shell. "God, this is wonderful, Maura. Thank you so much."
Maura laughs amused and also relieved. "You don't need to thank me, Jane."
Jane looks lovingly at the blonde and kisses her gently. "Oh yes, I have to."
Maura chuckles happy and relieved and kisses her wife once more.
xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
Maura puts on her leather coat and takes her purse into her hand.
She has decided to go back to the rehab clinic to pay her wife another visit. She doesn't care if Jane likes it or not.
They have to talk about her idea to move in in a residential home for handicapped people.
Maybe Jane is in a bad mood now and she is going to yell at her and perhaps insulting her too. But Maura doesn't care about that either.
All she wants is that Jane does think about her own suggestion that Jane comes back home and that they give it shot for at least thirty days. And if it doesn't work out in those thirty days, they can talk about an alternative.
Maura switches off the light in her office and closes the door.
She is well aware of the fact that she isn't a fan of confrontations but she also knows that she can't always avoid them. Especially not when Jane tries to hide behind her brothers.
That, she won't accept.
The blonde knows that it will be a long road that Jane and she have to take, but she is willed to wait as long as it'll takes. She has to for her own sake. She already wallowed for far too long in self-pity.
Now it has to end. Now it will end. She can't afford it anymore. She is becoming a mother. They are becoming mothers.
She nods to herself to encourage herself.
The drive to the Spaulding Rehabilitation Hospital only takes five minutes. It's not enough time to break her about more things.
Maura doesn't bother to sign up herself again and walks straight up to the elevator.
At this time she doesn't have to wait too long for the elevator. She emerges from it on the same floor like in the morning and heads to the common room.
"Oh, come on." booms a familiar voice through the halls. "You have to be kidding me."
Maura has to smile all of a sudden. This is the kind of behavior that she is missing.
She enters the common room and spots her favorite lanky figure that is sitting in front of the TV. She takes a moment to enjoy the sight.
This is her. This is her wife like she always knew her. And she always knew that this kind of person would still be in Jane.
Maura takes a deep breath and walks to Jane. "Hi." she almost whispers not to startle the Italian.
Jane looks up at her and a smile tugs on the corners of her lips. "You are taking advantage of the fact that I can't kick you out of here myself, huh?"
If Maura wouldn't see the signs of a smile she would be offended.
But she isn't.
Instead she chuckles a little and sits down on the chair next to her wife. "I also take advantage of the fact that you can't run away from me anymore."
Jane's eyebrows shoot up and she stares at the blonde.
Panic spreads through Maura's chest. That was really inappropriate, but it felt like the old times when both women were teasing each other.
She opens her mouth to apologize but she gets interrupted as Jane bursts out laughing.
Jane release the breaks on her wheelchair. "I still can shoot off." she laughs.
Maura asks herself what happened over the day. The Italian seems like an completely different person. Like a person who has accepted her faith. But she knows that it can change in any second.
She chuckles softly and embraces the warmth that spreads through her cold heart.
Jane takes a deep breath. "You didn't bring beer with you, did you?"
Maura glares at her. "Jane ..."
"It was just a joke." Jane says and sighs. "I guess Frankie talked to you."
Maura sobers immediately and nods. "He did."
Jane nods to herself and rolls backwards. "What are you saying to my idea."
Maura licks her lips and frowns slightly. "I would like it if we try it at home at first. At least for thirty days. And if it doesn't work out, we can talk about other options."
The Italian takes a deep breath. "Maura ..." she says and her voice cracks. She clears her throat and tries it again. "Maura, I need help. I ... I need help with taking a shower. I need help with ... that. My body doesn't work anymore like it did a year ago. I don't work like I did as we got to know each other."
Maura runs her fingers over her lips and frowns deeply. "I know and it doesn't matter to me." she whispers.
The Italian takes her distance. "What if we don't work anymore too? What if I mess up everything? Today is one of my good days, Maura. I don't want to hurt you. I ... I don't want to hurt Ma. That's why I didn't want to see one of you all those months. I knew that Frankie and Tommy could handle my moods. Barely, though. I didn't want the two of you see me like ... this."
Maura presses her lips together. "That's the reason why you didn't want to see us?"
Jane clenches her teeth. "Yeah."
Maura takes a deep breath and closes her eyes. It's the first day they finally talk again and they suddenly talk so much.
A tear runs down her cheek. Not a tear of sorrow. It's a tear of happiness.
"On our wedding day I promised you to be there for you in good and in bad times. And right now it is a bad time, but I won't leave your side. Because I love you, Jane. And the others will be there for you too. Because they love you too. And we will get through this together."
Jane laughs bitterly. All Maura has said sounds so easy. "You make it sound like we're talking about an sprained ankle." she points down at her body. "This is not temporarily, Maura. This ... This is permanent. This is me. This is my new self. I got shot three times in my back and two of those bullets pierced my spinal cord. My shrink tells me the whole time that I should call myself lucky. Oh yeah, I'm so lucky that I am still alive. I am so lucky that I won't be able to do my job ever again. I am so that I can't feel anything from down my god damn middle part, Maura. How shall I call myself lucky? Huh? I am used to move my legs for over thirty years and now I can't anymore. My own fucking body betrays me and my shrink calls me lucky. I should myself lucky because I am confined to a wheelchair? This is so fair. Yeah, so fair ... I rather be ..."
"You died." Maura whispers with tears in her eyes.
Jane freezes. "What?"
Maura looks straight in brown eyes and can't keep her tears at bay anymore. "You died, Jane. You did twice right underneath my hands. And you came back. You came back to me."
Jane wheels forward. "I was forced back to life. If it wouldn't have been me then you would have let the victim die."
Maura blinks the tears away and licks her lips. "I am a physician, Jane. Even if it would have been a stranger, I would have done everything possible to safe the person's life."
Jane huffs and rolls her eyes. "Yeah, sure."
"Jane ..." the whispers and takes a deep breath. "I know that this whole situation is hard for you. It is ..."
"You know nothing!" the brunette yells and slams her hands down on the arm rests. She closes her eyes and inhales through her mouth. "You know nothing, Maura. You know that we'd gone every morning for a run. And what shall I do now? Wheel beside you and let the other people stare at me? And what about my job, huh? I do not have a job anymore! I was with heart and soul a Detective. I've worked my butt off to get into Homicide. It is easy for you. You can get out of bed every morning and can go to work, doing what you love. But I can't do what I love anymore because I am wheelchair-bound." she points at Maura's belly. "And what about this baby? How should I take care of the little one? I am not able to get up the stairs. Not to mention to frisk around. What kind of mother would that make me?"
Maura takes a deep breath and crosses her legs. "Our baby isn't born yet. We still have time, Jane."
Jane shakes her head. "I don't know, Maura. I think you would be far better off without me."
The blonde can't hold it back anymore and takes her wife's hand in her own. "No, I am not. I am not far better off without you. I have decided to spent the rest of my life with you. I want you to come home because ..." she places her free hand over Jane's heart. "Because I know that in there, there is still the woman with whom I fell in love. And that's all that matters. I didn't fell in love with your body."
Jane furrows her eyebrows. "Oh no?"
Maura rolls her eyes but smiles. "No. I fell in love with your personality and with your big heart. I know that we won't have the easiest time but we should give it a try."
Jane drops her eyes to the floor and frowns deeply.
Maura can see that she is considering her words and their meanings. She can see the wheels turning in Jane's head and a sparkle of hope inflames in her heart.
Jane furls her eyebrows and glances at her wife. "All right." she mumbles.
Maura frowns slightly. "All right?"
Jane takes a deep breath and looks at the blonde. "We give it a try ... For thirty days. If it doesn't work I'll move into a residential home for persons like me."
Maura tries to keep an straight face but she fails miserable. She can't hide smile that tugs on the corners of her lips. She takes a deep breath and nods. "Okay. Well that a start." she glances down at her watch and gets up to her feet, "Well, I should get going. I wanted to talk to you about that."
Jane doesn't release the hand of her wife. Instead, she holds it firmly. "Maura ..."
The blonde swallows hard and looks into brown eyes.
"Could you ... Would it be strange if ..."
Maura leans her head down and silence the Italian with her lips.
She doesn't know if that's what Jane was asking for but she has to swallow back a moan as the Italian squeezes her hand.
She breaks grudgingly the kiss and keeps her eyes closed. Now, she also has to swallow a sob.
She's been dreaming about this for a little while.
"Be safe." Jane whispers.
Maura smiles a little. "I love you, Jane."
Jane doesn't say it back. Instead she squeezes Maura's hand again.
She sighs heavily as the blonde leaves her alone and wheels back in her room.
