A/N: Thanks everyone for the great reviews! I know you have some questions and some will be answered within the next couple of chapters and others will take a little longer to uncover but I hope you continue to enjoy the story. Some might not like a little of the Peyton conversations but I am absolutely, without a doubt 110 percent anti-leyton. So don't worry, it'll all work out. Thanks again for the reviews!


Chapter 9 - Doesn't Get Easier With Time

"So what are you and Chase going to do about the distance?" Peyton queried as she sat on Brooke's bed, watching her friend unpack one item of clothing after another. Her own luggage still remained untouched, sitting beside the door in the room she'd be occupying down the hall. It wasn't nearly as lavish as Brooke's but then again, it was only a guest bedroom.

"I'm not sure," Brooke admitted quietly. "He's been ready to go to USC since way before we even met. And even with my parents here, California just isn't the place for me. Plus, if I'm ever gonna have a shot at a career in fashion… I need to be in New York," she explained. "At least to start out." But try as she might, she couldn't keep the sadness out of her voice.

While Peyton heard it, she never noticed the fear that also coated Brooke's words.

"Yeah, I know what you mean," the blonde said. Her mind was already thousands of miles away. Back in Tree Hill with the boy she left behind. "Lucas has that whole state school, coaching thing set. And I have no idea where I'll end up," she admitted. "I guess I just need to remember how much we love each other. That we can get through the distance, you know?"

Several responses crossed Brooke's mind but she settled on the most honest one. The response she would have given without hesitation if the guy had been anyone else but Lucas. "Love can get you through a lot of things Peyton but it isn't always enough. Being on tour almost broke Nathan and Haley and it had more to do than just his insecurities about Chris," she reminded, thinking back to all the anger and bitterness that had consumed Nathan while his wife was away. "You can love someone with your whole heart but if it isn't meant to be… then no amount of wishing will make it work."

Confused, Peyton closed her eyes and shook her head. It was as if she was shaking away the fog her mind was in. "Wait… are you trying to tell me that I shouldn't worry about me and Lucas because in the long run it won't work anyway?" she questioned but where Brooke expected anger, there was only more confusion. And a little bit of hurt.

Sighing, she set down the dress she was about to hang up and instead looked her best friend in the eyes. "I'm saying that love isn't perfect," she corrected gently. "You love each other and that's great. So if you two are meant to be together, no matter how difficult it is at times, you'll get through. Because people who are meant to be together always find their way in the end."

Brooke didn't mention that she had first said those words to Lucas two years before. And though she talked about Karen and Keith, when she believed the two were meant to be together, in the end their love wasn't enough. Hate was too strong of an emotion. Now once again Karen was a single mother trying to raise a child

And the man she loved now rested somewhere in the heavens, undoubtedly watching from his place above

Brooke wasn't so sure she believed the words anymore. But she kept telling herself she did. Holding on to a beautiful ideal made it easier at times to get through the lonely moments.

"Okay, who are you and what have you done with my shopaholic best friend?" Peyton asked, hoping to lighten the mood a little. But her words had the opposite effect and Brooke had to fake a smile. Because even after all they had been through, Peyton still couldn't see the changes inside Brooke. She would always be the D student that had a good heart buried beneath shallow tendencies.

The polite thing to do was invite Peyton inside, so that was what they did. But the blonde seemed nervous when she was realized she was interrupting what appeared to be a family dinner. Apologies on her lips, she offered to leave and come back later. No one knew what to say at first but it had been Brooke that told her to stay.

The reunion of three would happen one way or another, she believed. It was inevitable.

So Peyton sat down at the table throughout dinner and attempted to hide the uncertainties she obviously felt. Uncertainties that quickly turned into feelings of inadequacies.

In the past she had had so much success with Jenny. She had loved and adored the little girl and the feeling, it seemed, had always been mutual. But when Peyton tried to stir up conversation with Lily about school and her friends, the little girl's immediate response had been to shy away.

Karen had been mystified by her daughter's behavior and Peyton looked as though she was trying hard to feel hurt by it.

Of course she was always polite. Karen had raised her daughter to always be polite, but Lily didn't remember Peyton and seemed a little frustrated that the blonde continued to bring up things that Lily had no recollection of. Moments in time that occurred when she was no more than a couple years old.

So when dinner was through and the plates had been cleared, Brooke feigned a headache. Naturally Lucas had offered to drive her home when she insisted on calling a cab but Brooke gently turned him down. It just didn't seem like a smart idea. Especially since Peyton no longer appeared to be in any hurry to leave. Though she smiled awkwardly as she said goodnight, the blonde was obviously anxious to sit down and talk to Lucas.

Not that Brooke was in any way surprised.

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"I was thinking that maybe you could recommend someone to take a look at my car," Peyton said, wringing her hands together nervously. They were behind closed doors but unlike so many times in the past, she felt uncomfortable and off balance. "It's basically been sitting in the garage at home and I'd love to get it running again," she explained, hoping he'd volunteer for the job as he had five years ago when she made the same request for her dad's old car.

"You should call Deb. I'm sure she'd send someone over from the body shop to take a look at it," Lucas said quietly.

After Dan was tried and sentenced, it came as a shock to everyone that he left control of the dealership to Karen, along with the title to the body shop he'd once purchased from Keith. But she wanted no part of anything Dan had touched and signed everything over to Deb. It was a good way to keep herself out of trouble. The business would give her a reason to feel tired and proud at the end of the night. Something that Deb truly needed after her stints in rehab and the loneliness she felt once Haley, Nathan and James moved away for college.

Deb promised to do a good job because she also had another responsibility that mattered a great deal to her. Becoming godmother to little Lily Roe Scott. And with that title along with being a grandmother came the desire to be a better role model than she had been in the previous years.

"Right… yeah, of course. I'll just... you know, call Deb." Pushing past disappointment, Peyton looked around the room that seemed so bare.

The bed remained along with most of the furniture but the posters that had once graced his wall were now gone. Pictures were noticeably absent as well as the majority of books that had once lined his shelves. It was also so empty… so different. "Peyton, what are you doing here?" Lucas finally asked.

She was surprised it had taken him so long.

"Didn't you get the e-mail I sent?"

"Yeah, you mentioned something about a visit," Lucas replied, thinking of the letter that he'd been so loathsome to open. "But I thought that wasn't for a couple more weeks," he added, confused when he saw her slight smile.

Time had changed her appearance. Long hours of work had probably also contributed.

The blonde hair that had gone through various lengths of straight and curly was now cut short and sleek. A cap of light hair that was pin straight and so unlike the unruly mass it had been when they first began all those years before. Her eyes were still as green and closed off as they had ever been but now dark circles tinted the skin beneath them. Lucas could read the tiredness on her face and wondered if she had been crying because of the hints of red he saw around the green depths.

"Change of plans," Peyton said. "I e-mailed you this morning but I guess you never got it."

It was a small thing but she was glad to know he hadn't received the second letter. It at least proved that he didn't show up at the airport because he'd been unaware as opposed to unconcerned. "It's been a long day," Lucas replied and dug his hands in the pockets of his windpants.

Sighing, Peyton toyed with the hem of her leather jacket for a few moments before asking, "Is it at all possible to try and remember the friendship we once had?"

"It wasn't really much of a friendship, if you think about it," Lucas said without hesitation. He could see the sadness she carried around, weighing down her shoulders, but unlike all his previous actions, this time he stayed put. There was no impulse to rush forward and comfort her as he had done so many other times. "Friendships are supposed to include honesty and there wasn't a whole lot of that in ours, was there?"

"Lucas, I was always honest with you," Peyton quickly defended. "Sometimes more honest than I should have been," she added, thinking of the night she told him her true feelings.

"One bit of truth hardly matters when its sitting on top of a bunch of other omissions."

"Are you trying to say that it didn't matter when I first told you I loved you?" she demanded, looking at him with unseeing eyes. Peyton could hardly believe that the man standing before her had once been the same boy who had loved and taken care of her. She searched but it was almost impossible to find traces of that boy.

"I'm saying that I'm tired of having the same conversation because the end is always the same," Lucas said tiredly. "I promised Lily I'd read to her before I left and I have another long day tomorrow. So you should probably go," he advised quietly. There were no intentions to hurt her or make things worse but Lucas couldn't stand around playing the same games. They were old and had long since grown weary of them.

"Fine," Peyton sighed, defeat mixed with hints of anger. "But before I go I just need to know one thing," she added and Lucas knew her question before she even asked it.

"When you ask the same questions, you'll always get the same answers," he said simply and watched her shoulders slump. Quietly, she closed the outside door behind her and left Lucas to his musings. He wondered if there would ever be a resolution to the merry go round that never seemed to stop. Even knowing where he wanted it to land, he had no idea if it ever would.

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"I told you, you'd be fine," Brooke stated as she leaned back in bed and listened to her roommate's excited rant. "It was probably just stress or something."

"Either way it's a relief," Solaris stated with a sigh. "Truth is… if it had been more, I have no idea who the father could have been." She sounded almost embarrassed by the confession and not for the first time, Brooke was reminded of her own past. Of the girl she used to be. Drunken nights, plenty of boys and not many memories to accompany it all.

"Honestly, I don't understand why you won't just settle down with that editor guy you like so much," Brooke admitted, all the while already knowing the answer.

No matter how good the guy was, Solaris had a difficult time with trust.

Too many men wanted a piece of her for various reasons and it made it difficult to pinpoint the one who deserved her attention. Brooke thought her friend had found that guy when she began dating an editor at W but Solaris wasn't as certain. "Because I'm only twenty and there's no way in the world I've already met the guy I'm meant for. It doesn't happen when you're this young, Brooke. Not for girls like me." Cynical as it was, Brooke could hardly blame Solaris for her viewpoint.

Not everyone was Naley. Not everyone found their true love at age sixteen. And of those who did… few got to keep it.

"You never know," Brooke offered and chatted with her roommate for a few more minutes before Solaris got another call that she absolutely had to take. A photographer twho she had dated off and on since she was seventeen. Personally Brooke thought he was a scumbag but Solaris was content enough so she kept her mouth shut.

Alone in a quiet room, she contemplated finding something suitable on cable to watch. Or maybe walking down the local video store to rent a new release. There were plenty of them that Brooke hadn't seen since she had little time in the city for things as simple and pleasant as going to the movie theater to catch the latest blockbuster. Not to mention the overflowing TIVO box back at the apartment that was saving all the newest episodes of all her favorite shows.

Though the task of deciding which moving to rent was put on hold when Haley called. "I tried your cell but it went straight to voicemail," she informed while Brooke glanced at the trashcan that housed the broken pieces of her phone.

"Long story. What's up?" she asked in what she hoped was a cheerful voice.

"Call me selfish but I kind of wanted to know if you'd come over again," Haley said, cajolingly.

"Is everything alright?" Brooke was quick to ask.

"Yeah, fine… same as usual," Haley responded. "But you'll be leaving in a few days and with your schedule, who knows when you'll be back so… I guess I just wanted to hang out a little more," the young mother admitted. "I have ice cream," she added, hoping to tempt her friend's sweet tooth.

"Sold," Brooke easily agreed.

Searching the room for her discarded keys, the last thing she expected was a knock on her door.

Few people even knew where she was staying. The small circle including, Haley, Karen and Lucas. Yet Brooke doubted it was any of the three, especially not Haley. So it was with mild trepidation that she pulled open the door and found Peyton Sawyer standing on the other side for the second time that night.

"This night just keeps getting interesting," Brooke said lightly and held the door open wide, silently inviting the blonde in.

"I know I'm probably the last person you expected to see here," Peyton acknowledged, offering a small smile.

"Which makes us even, I guess," Brooke replied, then elaborated because of the blonde's confused expression. "I'm sure I was the last person you expected to find when you went to see Lucas." She did it first. She said his name and brought him into the conversation to avoid beating around the bush later. Because Brooke had no doubt that their mutual ex was part of, it not the whole reason why Peyton decided to swing by her hotel room.

"I didn't know that the two of you still kept in touch," Peyton said, baiting. And because she was eager to get the conversation over and done with so she could go see Haley, Brooke took the in she was given. Then afterwards it was an effort to not roll her eyes when she noticed the small hint of relief in Peyton's green gaze. She was obviously happy to learn that Brooke and Lucas had not talked in over two years before her return visit to Tree Hill. But what she said next did come as a small surprise to the brunette who had assumed something entirely different. "He and I don't really talk that much either," Peyton admitted while glancing around at the neat little hotel room.

It wasn't stylish or chic but homey and comforting instead. The walls were painted with soft muted colors and the lighting was low and relaxing. It was reminiscent of a little bed and breakfast with vases of fresh flowers and the old fashioned four poster bed.

"Staying friends with an ex is rarely easy," Brooke acknowledged after a moment's pause.

"That's the truth," Peyton said, thinking of the broken friendships with both Lucas and Jake. Neither had been salvageable when all was said and done. They'd all gone their separate ways and for a while, Peyton believed it was for the best. But with time passed, she was no longer as certain as she'd once been. Especially because of the loneliness that never seemed to completely go away. "Particularly when the ex is Lucas Scott, right." It was an attempted joke but Brooke hardly found it funny.

"Listen, Peyton… we haven't exactly spoken in a few years, not that I blame you because it was just as much me as it was you," the brunette stated, deciding to end it before it began. "So I can only guess that the reason you're here talking to me now is because of Lucas. But the thing is that I have nothing to do with whether you get back together or stay apart and I'd prefer it if you continued to leave me out of it." Surprise registered on Peyton's face but she said nothing to interrupt. "So if you don't mind… I have other things to do tonight than play back and forth with you because you don't know how else to ask about him."

In the past Brooke Davis had given plenty of people reasons to underestimate her. She rarely showed her serious side and even then, some were content to continue casting her in the role she had previously played. It was comfortable to believe that she would always be the girl who made mistakes. The one who never had the moral high ground.

But Brooke had grown up a lot since then and she no longer accepted the typecast.

She was strong and not at all eager to get sucked back into the triangle from hell. "Brooke…" the blonde began uncertainly. "It isn't just about Lucas. It's about the friendship we used to have."

Closing her eyes, Brooke felt a wave of anger flood her senses. But when she spoke, there was nothing but calmness in her voice. "If that was true, then you wouldn't have waited until you saw me with Lucas and his family. You would have called or e-mailed… you would have found some way to contact me. So please don't try to pretend that this visit is more than actually is."

"Brooke, I don't even know if Lucas and I have a shot again but I swear to you that he isn't the reason why I'm here," Peyton assured, eyes pleading with her former best friend. "I lost my way in Los Angeles. I'm not proud of the things I did or the person I became which is why I decided to come back here. I needed the stability to get myself back on track and I really hope that somehow we can mend our broken friendship."

She seemed sincere but Brooke wasn't sure she could give in. Not after all the lying and heartbreak the blonde had contributed to.

"The thing is, Peyton… I'm not so sure we ever had a friendship," Brooke said quietly. "Or if we did it probably wasn't much of one if it could be broken so easily." It wasn't meant to hurt but the brunette couldn't lie for the sake of making things easy. "So like I said… I have someone else to see tonight. A friend that didn't think friendships only lasted until a great guy came along."

"Low blow," Peyton stated.

"Fitting… isn't it?"