Chapter 9

Author's note: Please, bare with me.

She always knew.

When she joined the band, just with one glance she knew. The orange haired boy was not his first, or last victim.

She looked to Nnoitra who was sitting on the couch, a small boy sitting on his lap, a wide smile on his lips as he talked nonstop. That smile would vanish within ten minutes.

Shinji, Nnoitra's boyfriend knew of his ways, which is why boyfriends was never really the proper term to describe them. Fuck buddies wasn't even close.

Nnoitra was a monster.

Neliel reseated herself on her couch, her eyes turning up to Nnoitra who was busy staring off into space, a small grin stretching his lips.

No, he was more than a monster.

When he spotted the orange haired boy for the first time, she knew, looking to him herself. Her eyes held warning. There was no sympathy as he walked closer, transfixed in the hypnosis Nnoitra seemed to have put him under, his eyes locked on him.

Grimmjow, a boy she had always seen as a brother, she knew just from his facial expression he had noticed this, though she failed to send him a similar warning.

When Nnoitra brought the boy onto the stage, she knew it was too late.

For many years, she has stood by, hearing the screams of the young boys behind the closed door of his room, watching them walk out with bruises and bleeding wounds that were nearly nightmarish just to witness.

Some never got the opportunity to leave that room.

His previous victim was luckier than the rest, seeing as how, if Nnoitra's words were true, he had dumped him in an alley close to home.

She knew that once the story of the orange haired boy gets out, suspicions would rise, and names will be thrown about. None of his victims had the courage to speak up, but Neliel felt, this time one did.

If Nnoitra had spilled into him, his DNA would be matched and the police would break down their doors, and the band known as Hollow Hearts would cease to exist.

She remembered when they were just an unknown band playing in the clubs.

They had ventured around for a bit before they found a solid gig at a place called Hueco Mundo. It was a bar that was usually filled with worn through no lives or people fresh from prison. It was a place for the misfits, and they had fit right in.

Szayel, a slut of a man, was nothing like Nnoitra. He was clean and fresh, and if her small insight in his life had been true, he used to be his father's experiment. Years of supposed child sexual harassment and molestation led to the constant whoring of his body. Before the band he used to be a porn star, and when they finally hit big, it was all over the news and current gossip.

Strangely that made them more popular.

They were all misfits, her own tragic life one she did not care to elaborate on, and Nnoitra's obsession with younger men, mere boys to be exact.

They were a group of unwanted low lives, and in Hueco Mundo, they had fit in perfectly. For two years they had performed there, some of the regulars giving Nnoitra the fix he craved, and in turn got Szayel for the night. Whether it be three, or six men.

No one touched her though. No one saw her as something to be wanted, but something to be feared. She was the fury of every man and women in that bar, an unstoppable force pushed into one body. She was respected for her small acts of charity, helping those there with money issues and so forth. She was their Goddess.

It wasn't till Aizen, Nnoitra's father came along that things change. He had originally disowned Nnoitra, but with an adopted son he had named Grimmjow and a sudden win of the lottery, his eyesight in itself had gone maniacal.

He had gone there in search of a new pet, one of many he would treat as Nnoitra treated his victims, but when he witnessed their talents, his mind changed course.

Being a lawyer of marriage cases, he had gotten some connections. They went from slum rats to living like royals seemingly overnight.

She sighed when Nnoitra whispered into the boys ear, the boys smile faltering just slightly.

His eyes glanced to her, Neliel looking away.

This was something she was afraid he would have to deal with on his own. He was hesitant but eventually agreed with what he offered, his hand held in his as Nnoitra led him to his room.

Neliel closed her eyes.

Soon the screams would start. She got up, not feeling she could bare to listen this time. She walked into the hallway in their large hotel room, passing by Szayel's door.

She could hear his shallow grunts and the clinking of metal against metal, her eyes downcast as she continued to walk. His new lover, Yammy was hideous in all aspect of the word, but he was brutal and uncaring, leaving Szayel with enough bruises and wounds to put him in the hospital. How Szayel enjoyed it, she had lacked to learn.

She entered her room, closing the door softly behind her.

She closed her eyes when the screams started.

All lights were turned off in her room, nothing but darkness greeting her. She felt safe here though, her eyes opening slowly. She wished to drown out the screams but knew it was futile, feeling as if she levitated towards the dresser next to her window, moonlight shining in from the rustling curtains, her window wide open.

On the window seal sat a photo, her fingers grabbing the soft though thick paper, tilting the photo towards the moonlight.

She stood in a school uniform, two girls wearing the same outfit standing next to her, grinning brightly while she blushed, a small, shy smile tilting her lips.

They were long gone she knew, both deceased, nonexisting to this world. As she listened to the boys screams, her mind blended it, the screams resembling those of her friends who had gone a long time ago. Nnoitra did not remember her when she joined the band but even after all these years, in fear of the same fate, was the only reason she has remained silent. But she was plotting, and the one who took it all from her, was the same person who took everything from so many other's.

Nnoitra was going to reap what he sowed, and it was going to be by her hands.

Ichigo woke abruptly, a scream that had been building in his throat bit back, his entire frame shaking like a leaf in the wind. He forced himself to calm down, his hand shaking as he touched it to his chest, feeling the erratic heart beat beneath his palm. The heart monitor was on the verge of going ballistic, Ichigo looking to the side to see if Grimmjow was there.

He amazingly was but he was asleep, his head leaned against the wall as he crossed his arms over his chest, seeming rather uncomfortable. Ichigo released a shaky breath, regretting it when azul blue eyes opened.

Grimmjow blinked a few times before looking to him, frowning as he stood, stretching with a yawn.

"Are you alright?" he yawned, Ichigo not responding verbally or physically.

Grimmjow noticed this and frowned, walking up to the bed, Ichigo rising up slowly.

"What's wrong?" he asked him, Ichigo looking away from his worried eyes.

"Nothing," he whispered, Grimmjow snorting as he looked to the clock. Visiting hours would end in an hour so he had Ichigo scoot over, laying in the bed with him. This way, Ichigo couldn't escape from him, Grimmjow settling down with a heavy sigh.

"Talk to me," he told him, Ichigo looking down to Grimmjow's clothed chest.

"Did you have a nightmare?" Grimmjow asked, Ichigo silent for a moment. He gave a small nod.

"Do you want to tell me what it was about?" Grimmjow asked, Ichigo once again quiet.

Grimmjow was patient, knowing that going slow with his still dramatized mind was key. What he wanted to do was have the ability to read his thoughts, feeling hopeless when he couldn't do anything to help him.

"Can you hold me?" Ichigo whispered desperately, Grimmjow shocked by the sudden request.

He obeyed though, wrapping his arms around Ichigo's small waist, careful of the mark as he pulled him flush against him. Ichigo was shaking in his arms, Grimmjow wishing he could do something to make it stop, holding him tighter. That's when Ichigo finally broke down.

After two weeks of holding it all in he released it onto his chest, his one free hand fisting in his shirt as he sobbed brokenly, his tears wetting the fine material. His broken arm was lying on Grimmjow's side, lifeless.

Grimmjow hushed him, whispering to him it was alright even though he knew it would never be, his hand not squished beneath Ichigo's body sliding up his neck and into his unruly orange locks that had grew considerably.

He massaged his scalp, the only real comfort he was able to give him. His words meant little, did little he knew, but his voice he hoped would sooth Ichigo, closing his eyes as he tried to hold back his tears.

He had to be strong for the both of them.

For a long time they stayed like that, Grimmjow whispering words of comfort as Ichigo cried out all of his pain and suffering, choking on his own saliva when he breathed in too quickly. Grimmjow rubbed his back as he coughed, sobs inserted between them.

Grimmjow bit his bottom lip, a tear falling down his temple. His Ichigo was in so much pain, was suffering so much but he couldn't do anything! He couldn't erase his memory, couldn't soothe him or comfort him! He was at the mercy of the gods but he couldn't do anything!

His bottom lip began to tremble but he he bit harder into it, taking in a deep shaky breath.

"It's o-okay," he whispered, his voice cracking from the lump in his throat, holding Ichigo closer.

Slowly Ichigo's sobs died away into slow intake of breaths, the occasional hiccup arising.

"I'm right here," Grimmjow whispered, Ichigo tightening his hand in his shirt.

"When..." he didn't finish though, his voice shaky. Grimmjow let him take his time.

"W-When he was raping me, I was screaming for you."

Grimmjow froze, a feeling he couldn't identify crawling up his spine.

"I had wished…" Ichigo took in a shaky breath, pressing closer.

"I had wished you would come and save me," he whispered, Grimmjow's lip trembling as he tried to reign in the flow of emotions that had began to overwhelm him.

"But you weren't there," he whispered, a sob building up in his chest.

"You weren't there when I needed you!" Ichigo sobbed, Grimmjow closing his eyes, tears falling in a steady stream down his face.

"I screamed for you but you never came!" Ichigo was sobbing again, holding tighter onto Grimmjow.

"I'm so sorry, Grimmjow. I'm sorry about everything, I-"

Grimmjow cut him off by grabbing his chin, pressing his lips against his.

The kiss was urgent, Grimmjow only pulling away when Ichigo had seemed to have calmed down.

"Don't you ever fucken apologize!" he growled, Ichigo looking at the tears on his face, almost seeming shocked.

"I fucken left you. I didn't protect you like I should've!" he leaned in, kissing him again, Ichigo tightening his hand in his shirt.

"Don't you ever apologize," Grimmjow breathed against his lips, Ichigo closing his eyes as he began to sob again.

They laid there again, Grimmjow holding him close as Ichigo once again sobbed into his chest.

By the time visiting hours were over, Ichigo had fallen asleep. Grimmjow left his side, shifting Ichigo so he wouldn't put pressure on his injured side.

He left the room in a dark mood, his hands fisted at his sides. He walked to the elevator, his head lowered.

The last thing he wanted to do was leave, but for the both of them, he needed to be strong.

"Nnoitra Gilga!"

"Nnoitra is being investigated for rape charges-"

"Case is under investigation-"

"Ichigo Kurosaki-"

"Missing children cases have risen with suspicions of Nnoitra-"

"Rape or murder?"

"Is it true, or a hoax?"

Ichigo turned off the T.V., a scowl stretching his lips. His father sat in the room with him, his eyes downcast to the floor as he released a heavy sigh.

"They couldn't have made more of a scene," he grumbled beneath his breath, looking up when there was a knock at the door.

Ichigo's lips stretched up into a smile.

"Ichigo!" Yuzu bellowed as she ran into the room, Ichigo grunting when she scrambled onto the bed and hugged him, accidently pressing her knee into his very sore side.

"Oh god I'm so sorry," she gasped as she pulled away, Ichigo chuckling through clenched teeth.

"It's alright," he replied a bit breathily, rubbing his slowly healing injury.

"Your one resilient guy," Karin put in, making her presence known. Ichigo looked to her, giving her a smile. He extended his arms, Karin shifting from foot to foot at first before walking up to the bed, getting onto the bed too and hugging him.

"I missed you," Yuzu sniffled as Karin pulled away, taking her spot as she sat down next to him, Karin sitting at the foot of the bed.

"How do you feel?" she asked as he ran a hand through Yuzu's hair, shrugging his shoulders.

"They said I should be able to go back home in another week," he told her. He had just learned to walk again and though he was rather slow and had to stop constantly to rest, he was almost back to normal.

Most of his bruises had cleared up, some yellow splotching left of the bruise on his stomach, his cheek thankfully healing on its own, leaving a small scar, both bruises healed.

The N carved into his side was no longer in danger of being reopened but was still extremely sore, the main reason it was still a tad hard for him to walk.

Even though it pained him, he would probably no longer be able to play excessive sports or run for a long time, leaving him feeling left behind.

But he knew one day he would get better, his attention now focused on his family.

He played and talked for what seemed forever, his father letting his worries be washed away as he participated full heartedly.

It was like the last days his mother had existed on this planet, Ichigo feeling himself getting teary eyed every now and then. He was able to also order his food now since he was out of the danger zone, ordering a slice of cheese cake with a root beer float with strawberries and a slice of meatloaf, sharing some with Yuzu and Karin when they asked to try it. It was less bland and was actually pretty good, Karin scrunching up her nose when she tasted the meat loaf.

"Whoever made that don't know how to cook," she insulted as she drank some of their dads soda he got from the vending machine. Ichigo laughed, knowing her words were true.

It was dry and had little grease to it, but with help of his root beer float he managed to wash it down. He was somewhat used to it now.

"I'll cook a big meal when you come back home, alright Ichigo?" Yuzu insisted, Ichigo nodding his head, his mouth watering from the thought of tasting her delicious mushroom soup and flaky brownies that almost melted in his mouth.

The fun was cut short when their dad advised they went out to eat, his stomach growling noisily. The three left, leaving Ichigo alone once again.

Someone came in and took his dishes, Ichigo sighing when he laid back down. He closed his eyes, letting out a deep breath.

He opened his eyes when he heard a knock, a smile stretching his lips when he saw Grimmjow at the door's frame, sitting up again even though it pained him, his side acting up again. He hissed, Grimmjow walking in briskly, dropping his bag onto the chair before putting a hand to Ichigo's chest, coaxing him to lay back down.

"Don't over work yourself," he scolded, Ichigo smirking as he playfully slapped his arm.

"I'm bruised, not broken," he chuckled, the simple act hurting him. He endured the pain though, Grimmjow going back to his chair, scooting it close to the bed, placing his sculpted forearms onto the white sheets.

"I saw the news," he said after a long while, Ichigo sighing as he closed his eyes.

"They say you might not have been the only victim," Grimmjow said softly, Ichigo fisting his hand in the sheets.

Grimmjow clenched his teeth. He should have known.

He swallowed thickly, demanding for the red in his eyes to fade, knowing Nnoitra was too far away for him to actually do anything.

"How's your other arm doing?" Grimmjow asked to change the subject, knowing it was a hard one for Ichigo.

He seemed to brighten at the sudden change, lifting his arm with a grin.

"I am going to get the cast removed next week when I go home," he replied, Grimmjow grinning broadly as he took the covered arm, pressing it to his lips.

Ichigo blushed, waiting till Grimmjow let it go before resting it back on his stomach.

"Grimmjow…" Words seemed hard to form though, Ichigo biting his bottom lip.

"What about us?" Grimmjow frowned, a tad confused. Ichigo sighed, thinking of a way to rephrase it.

"What is our status, right now?" he asked, Grimmjow sitting back, looking to his lap.

"Well," he sighed, words tumbling in his head.

"I...I want to call you my boyfriend, but it seems to formal. I...I don't know I just want to call you mine, but then it sounds to animalistic and possessive…" Grimmjow groaned in defeat.

Ichigo smiled.

"I want you to know that I am rather confused Grimmjow. I am not going to be as open to you that way as you would like. Hell, I might not even let you touch me for a good while." Grimmjow was staring at him now, hurt, confusion and a slither of hope in his eyes.

"The truth is, is that I don't know if I am ready for a relationship with you." Grimmjow looked to the floor, his hope crushed.

"But," Ichigo put in, putting a hand in Grimmjow's blue hair.

"If any of this makes any sense, I want you to know that I'll try." Grimmjow perked up, meeting Ichigo's eyes.

"You'll go out with me?" he said in almost desperate hope, Ichigo pursing his lips.

"Yes, but no calling me your boyfriend, like you said, it is way too formal," Ichigo put in, Grimmjow pursing his lips.

"How about… my swain?" Ichigo's lips pulled up into a smile, chuckling softly.

"You're what?" he asked, Grimmjow grinning.

"My swain! It's an unusual word I know, but if you don't like it, I can call you my beau," he insisted, Ichigo laughing at his use of weird words.

"I think beau sounds better," he chuckled, rubbing his aching side. Grimmjow grinned.

"So it's official, you are my magnificent beau," Grimmjow breathed, Ichigo blushing lightly.

Grimmjow had to leave earlier than usual that day so once again Ichigo was left alone with his thoughts.

He smiled up at the ceiling.

"My magnificent beau...'

Author's note: I don't know about you guys, but this was a very emotional chapter for me. I almost cried while writing it.

Well anyway, Swain is pronounced how it looks but Beau sounds like bow. They both are another name for a companion or boy friend. Interesting ne?