Hungover. It really was the only term that accurately described what she was feeling.
JJ's heavy eyes sluggishly opened and struggled to blink back the haze of sleep. Squinting as her overly sensitive orbs filtered in soft rays of light, her vision started to adjust and her brain gradually registered what was the form of a...nightstand? Wasn't she? When had she gone to? The blonde couldn't think. The act proved to be too much as she was met with the sharp pounding in her head.
Wincing and adjusting to the pulsing sensation, JJ came to sense that she wasn't alone as she identified the feeling of an arm around her waist. Will. Another violent hammering to the temple brought upon a sudden wave of nausea, and her mouth closed quickly in order to stifle a groan. Snapping her eyes shut on reflex, the blonde remained as still as possible in hopes that the unpleasant feelings would eventually pass.
In her stillness, the bout of nausea slowly died and her headache had become more of a tolerable, dull throb. Finally gathering up the courage to move, JJ turned her head ever so slightly. As she did, she discovered that she had on the same clothes that she had worn the day before.
Instantly, the blonde's neural pathways fired on all cylinders and she found herself remembering...The episode...Will...Everything.
Not wanting to disturb her husband who was asleep (based upon the light, even breaths that could be heard), but still in desperate need of something comforting, JJ willed her weighted limbs to maneuver towards the edge of the bed. In the process, Will's hand had dropped onto the mattress, but his breathing remained even.
Quietly working her legs over the side, the blonde's feet made contact with the floor, and she quickly made her way towards the kitchen. It wasn't too long before a familiar aroma wafted throughout the house, and Will lethargically stirred from his slumber.
After rubbing his tired eyes, he moved his arm to find the other side of the bed unoccupied. But it was still warm. JJ hadn't been up for too long.
So rolling over onto his back and bringing both hands behind his head, Will stared up at the ceiling and pondered about how he was going to proceed. They weren't finished, by any means.
In the kitchen, JJ had found herself sitting at the table—legs brought up close to her chest for comfort. With both hands wrapped tightly around her coffee mug, the blonde slowly brought the warm liquid to her lips. And while it did wonders to soothe the dull throbbing in her head, it did nothing to mollify the raw, ever-expanding emotions.
In the midst of her self-reflection, JJ could hear footsteps, and Will could be seen entering the kitchen. Observing the look of exhaustion upon his face, the blonde was hit with guilt as she knew that she was the cause.
Seeing her body tense and noting the flash of guilt in her eyes, Will knew what he had to do at the moment...He had to wait.
Upon the conclusion, he shuffled towards the coffee pot, filled his own mug to the brim, and made his way to the table in an unhurried manner.
Not yet ready to delve into the inevitable conversation, JJ avoided making eye contact with her husband. Instead, she focused her attention on the kitchen clock. It was 8:30. She found herself counting the minutes that went by as they drank their coffee in silence. Will just sat and peered into his mug, watching the content get less and less with each sip that he took.
Fourteen minutes. That's how long it took for the two of them to finish their coffee. And as their empty mugs were set in front of them, there really wasn't anything else to divert their attention.
All at once, everything had to come to a standstill as the two finally made eye contact with each other and engaged in an all-out staring match. Both tried to get a read on the other, and both contemplated the delicate subject matter.
Conceding, JJ was the first to break eye contact. Her head turned as she attempted to collect her thoughts.
Eventually, she decided to meet her husband's gaze once more—this time accompanied with a sad smile that was starting to bend at the edges.
"I don't...know," she spoke softly. Finally putting an end to the deafening silence in the room, and somehow finding the courage to voice a response to the unspoken question that lingered between them.
"All I know is that-that Henry has to be picked up at 10:00," she let out a soft snort. "We have brunch on Sunday, and then it's back to work again on Monday." It was in that moment that the sad smile seamlessly morphed into a melancholic frown. And the blonde paused to swallow the emotive lump in her throat. "Life doesn't stop...It continues...even if..." Her voice started to waver and she looked away. "I've got to keep moving forward," she whispered to herself.
"JJ..." The way her husband spoke her name conveyed so much meaning.
Knowing his thoughts, the blonde looked up in that instant and shook her head. "No," she said in gentle protest.
"Don't you think you should try?" Will attempted once more, making sure to keep an even tone.
"And what would I do Will?" Her shoulders shrugged. "Sit and...talk to some stranger about how-how I've been trapped in my mind? Tell them...how I flashed back to the times when I was tortured with water...when I was electrocuted over and over and over?" Her volume started to increase. "Talk to them about...how I literally had my breath stolen when Henry went to surprise me. Because for a split second, I thought that I was being taken from inside our own home?" Her fingers ran through her hair in frustration. "Or, I don't know...how now my heart rate increases every single time that I even step inside the shower?"
The devastating reveal sent Will reeling and he was vastly overcome with heartache. This entire time, how could he not have seen in? How could he not have known?
In the midst of his guilt laden reverie, the blonde worked to steel herself. It was in that moment that the curtain had been lifted, and Will could finally see it—the mask.
With now guarded eyes and a look of pure determination, JJ resolved to bring the conversation to a close. "I told you...and that's a step. But it's not affecting my job so...no. Not when I've worked so hard to prove that I'm actually capable."
Seeing as how the mask was secured in place, Will had no other choice but to comply. "Okay," he said in defeat. He knew that his wife needed help—that she needed to truly talk to somebody. But he also knew her. And that it would take her coming to that realization herself. Pushing wasn't exactly conducive when her stubborn streak revealed itself. So until then, all he could do was wait and brace for the inevitable. At least now, she wouldn't have to go through it totally alone.
"Okay," she gave a small, definitive nod and slowly moved to get up from the table. She had to get dressed—get ready. Henry had to be picked up at 10:00.
She had to keep moving forward.
