-- Chapter 9

Clark stared at her, appearing as though he couldn't believe what he'd heard. Truth be told, Lois was having a hard time believing she'd said it. Of all the ways she'd imagined her life going, she'd never thought she'd live a life where she'd be able to travel back in time and go to her mom's funeral. Hell, she'd never imagined wanting to go through that again, but she had a goal to accomplish this time.

"What? No!"

Lois rolled her eyes. "We're doing this, Clark."

"We are not going to your mother's funeral, Loisཀ Not only is it beyond belief for you to want to go through that again, it runs the risk of changing things in the time line."

"Yeah, I know."

"What do you mean you know?"

"It means that I'm going to change things."

Clark stared at her again, though it didn't last as long this time. "What? No! Absolutely not, Lois."

Rubbing at her forehead, Lois started walking towards the city, leaving Clark behind her. She shouldn't have told him that she wanted to change things. Usually she hid things from him and he found out about her plans when Superman rescued her. It was a tried and true system. Why had she changed it in the year 1993?

After a moment Clark caught up to her, falling into step silently at her right side. Lois kept her eyes peeled, making note of things around them. She saw a few people that looked like they'd just crawled out of a Nirvana music video. She didn't have many memories of everyday fashion from this part of 1993, considering that she'd been, or was currently, six. Considering grunge was a fond memory for a minority of the population in 2015, she wasn't used to seeing it so embraced.

Covering a yawn as she walked, Lois used her free hand to adjust the backpack, shortening the straps some so that it wouldn't hang so low. She wasn't opposed to low hanging backpacks, but considering this one weighed about as much as her five heaviest backpacks ever, it was best to keep it tight and close to the body. She didn't need a backache while trying to change the future.

God, she was actually attempting to change the future. She was living the life of a character in a movie or television showཀ This type of thing shouldn't be possible, yet here she was, walking through her city twenty-two years prior to when she'd last walked in it. Of course, she should be less than shocked. She lived in a world where a man from another planet flew around the city under his own power and saved people, attempting to spread hope to the masses. And of course, that man from another planet was walking next her, probably thinking of some way to try and talk her out of changing the future. Fortunately, he'd never had any success with that sort of thing.

"What am I going to have to do to dissuade you from doing this?"

Lois glanced over at her partner for a second before looking back ahead at where they were walking. "You aren't going to dissuade me from doing this. The only thing that can keep me from getting it done is time, but I plan to avoid that little problem by using the Clark Kent express to make sure I'm at the funeral, which starts in..." She checked her watch. "... 38 minutes. Like I said, until then we have time for sightseeing. Well, I'd rather go straight there, but we don't have to."

"May I at least ask why?"

"Have you noticed what's going on in the world in 2015?"

"Please, refresh me."

"Things are a mess. My recently unknown cousin is threatening to release a retrovirus that could quite possibly cause one percent of the state's population to go insane and another one percent to keel over. The population of Kansas isn't that much more than three million, even with Metropolis in it. If anything in this scenario is a lucky break, that is. If we lived in the northeast, with the numerous population centers in close quarters we could be talking losses in the hundreds of thousands, if not millions. Where we live, with those two statistics we're still talking a potential of at least sixty thousand people insane and dead.

"We have a moral obligation to stop the insanity, if you'll pardon the pun. Of course, by doing so we're more or less guaranteeing that you're going to be outed as Superman. Your life as Clark Kent will effectively be over. That's the last thing that should happen to somebody that has done for the world what you have. Well, technically I guess getting killed is the last thing that should happen, but this is second."

"Couldn't agree more, though if it had to happen to save people, I'd do it."

Lois looked over at him, smiling a bit. "And that's why you're the hero of the story." Looking back the direction they were walking, Lois stopped. Clark stopped after another step and turned to face her. "I don't want anything bad to happen to you, Clark."

"And I don't want anything bad to happen to you. Granted, you do your best to make me work to see that nothing bad happens to you, but I forebear."

"The point of this is, we're in something of a no win situation. We stop it, you get outed. We don't stop it, thousands die and we lose our status as people that should have any right to tell other people what's right and what's wrong. Hell, even when we do put this out in the open the chances of Chloe getting caught are slim to none. She's probably never coming back to Metropolis from Switzerland now that we've confronted her about Project Medicina. She'll move around Europe and stay in neutral countries where she can never be arrested. Ooooh, big consequences for her actions there."

"That's something Superman could help with. I would clear going in and grabbing her with all proper authorities first, of course, but I find that world leaders always try to stay in the good graces of Superman. It's not that I wouldn't help out in a country that says no, but the threat that I wouldn't could be a powerful motivator."

Lois frowned a bit. "That doesn't sound like Superman."

Clark nodded back at her. "I know. I assume by that point Clark Kent will have been outed, so people will think that I'll be pissed off enough to do something like that. I'll just be using people's perceptions in my favor."

"Oh, well yeah, that's true." Lois nodded and started walking again. Clark caught up to her a few steps later.

"That doesn't mean that we need to change the whole of the future, Lois. If my identity has to come out to have a chance to stop Chloe's plan from happening, then I can live with that. I may have to build a fence around the farm to keep people out of my mom's hair, but it's doable and she'll understand."

"Let's see..." Lois held up her hands as scales as they walked. "Run the risk of tens of thousands, possibly hundreds of thousands dying and going insane or avert everything before it happens by changing the past."

"Yes, and we of course have NO idea what will happen or how things will turn out. The 2015 that ends up happening instead of the one we've been in could be worseཀ We don't know and we can't know."

Lois raised an eyebrow, though she didn't look over at him. "So better the devil you know?"

"That's one way of putting it. More the reality I know than the devil I know, though. I figure one way or another there's going to be a Luthor in 2015, silently terrorizing. Who knows what could happen in a reality where Lex is calling the shots, if we even fix things so that's happening?" He stopped talking for a second before continuing. "What are you even planning to change?"

Lois exhaled, frowning. "I'm going to confront my dad."

"About?"

"About blaming Chloe's father for my mom's death. I'm going to make him realize that my mom died because she didn't want to stop smoking, not because somebody else wouldn't. I doubt that she even would have remembered the deal with Chloe's dad if my dad hadn't fixated on it as a reason for her to quit. Point being, he shouldn't blame somebody else for my mom not quitting.

"Now, in theory, if I can get that to happen I imagine that she and I will grow up knowing each other. As such, she won't end up turning into a version of Chloe that I really, REALLY want to go insane as a result of her own drug. Hell, we change this one thing and I imagine that life will be a whole lot better in 2015, or if not better will at least have less impending doom for you keeping your identity a secret from the adoring masses."

"Always a plus."

Lois nodded and stopped walking. "Now let's quit wasting time." Throwing her arms around Clark's neck, Lois jumped up and got caught. She smiled at him. "The church on 8th, please."

She almost heard him rolling his eyes before the world turned into a blur. A second later everything went back to normal, though everything around them had changed. They were between a couple buildings now, standing behind some large piles of boxes. She unwrapped her arms from his neck and he let her down onto the ground. Running a hand through her hair, which always seemed to suffer from trips at super speed, Lois straightened herself out before taking the lead and walking onto the street.

Looking around, she spotted the church off to her left. All the cars and people milling into it were a dead giveaway. Pulling the backpack off, Lois held it out, not seeing if Clark was next to her or not, and had it taken a second later. Clark stepped up, the backpack slung over a shoulder. "You going to be all right getting through this, Lois?"

Lois let her teeth grind together for a moment, taking a few deep breaths to steel herself against what was coming. She really should have thought of a better date to go to. Pulling her sunglasses out of her pocket, Lois slipped them on. "Yeah, I'll be all right. At least now I'll have more memories of the funeral than just the one of trying to keep my sister calm." With one last breath, she squared her shoulders. "Let's go."

Walking with a more purposeful stride than usual, which Lois felt was saying something considering how she generally tried to stride with purpose, they made their way down the sidewalk. The closer they got to the church, the more she felt tension gathering in her shoulders and neck. She could get through this. She'd been through so many things, so reliving her mother's funeral shouldn't be THAT bad. Probably. Hopefully.

Getting to the church, Lois looked over to Clark, who smiled at her. Hell of a time to be smiling, her mom's funeral. Sure, he was just attempting to be comforting, but why couldn't he just massage the tension out of her shoulders? He was really good with his hands, and she needed that more than she needed the smile right about now. She wanted helpful comfort, not symbolic 'I'm here for you' comfortཀ They'd been partners for 7 monthsཀ How did he not get this?

Not that she was being irrational for thinking he should know. Why wasn't mind reading one of his powers?

Steeling herself once more, she started up the steps into the building, making her way through a few people gathered at the door into the lobby. Taking a program from somebody she didn't recognize, Lois checked to make sure Clark was still at her side before walking over to an empty corner and situating herself in it, away from anybody that might recognize her. With her luck, somebody would try to see her and try to figure out how she was related to her mom. 'How did you know the deceased?' 'I'm her daughter from the future here to change things so the future doesn't suckཀ' Yeah, that wouldn't get her thrown into the crazy house.

All things considered, maybe she'd already been dosed with the drug Chloe wanted to release. Superman the flying intergalactic traveler and time travel? She certainly wouldn't have believed it could happen before Clark had come to town.

"Is there a reason we're standing in the corner, Lois?"

Lois waved her hands discretely at him. "Shhhཀ Don't say my nameཀ"

Clark leaned forward and spoke in a whisper. "Is there a reason we're standing in the corner... person I'm talking to?"

Lois rolled her eyes. "People here know Lois Lane. Lois Lane is a six year old."

"But I didn't say Lois Lane, I said Lois. Other people in the world have the name Lois. You don't get the name all to yourself."

"Look, I prefer not to draw any attention to ourselves. It'll be hard to explain how I knew her, what with the looking a whole lot like her. People will get confused when a woman that looks like she could be Ella's sister says that she was a friend from college or a second cousin. We'll go in, sit through the service, wait for people to leave and then I'll confront my dad, hopefully before he does anything that damages relations between the Lane and Sullivan families."

"You don't want to draw attention, yet we come inside and stand in the corner?"

"Oh, shut up."

Looking at the program for the funeral, Lois skimmed through what was to come. It turned out not to be so much a program as a little leaflet telling about her mom... wait, hadn't she seen this before? Biting her lip, Lois tried to remember where she'd seen these words before. Jesus, where was her dad when she needed him? He would know the answer, if not be reluctant to answer.

Oh yeah. He was somewhere in the church. Maybe she could ask him later after getting him to not ruin things, not to mention the future.

"May I see that?"

She held the leaflet out and Clark took it from her. "It's just a short biography about my mom. I'm trying to remember where I've seen it before, but it won't come to me."

"Maybe you've seen one of these flyers before."

Lois shook her head and rubbed at her neck. "No, I think I would remember that. This is going to drive me nuts if I can't remember it."

Going back to thinking about where she'd seen it before, it suddenly came to her. A couple years ago they'd found a diary of her mom's from not long before she'd died. Lucy had wanted to get some of their baby toys out of storage when she'd found out she was pregnant and Lois had met her there, going through the boxes. When they'd found the diary Lois had stopped going through stuff to read it, and that had been the last entry.

Her mom had written her own biography for her funeral. That was just, like, nine thousand kinds of cryptic. It also sounded like something Lois would want to do. Better she write it and have it sound good than leave it to somebody else to get screwed up.

She should probably trust people more. She should also probably remember that they were here for a reason and she shouldn't be letting her mind drift off to things that weren't exactly pertinent for what they were trying to do. Looking around, Lois noted that people were starting to head in and sit down with more frequency, so she decided they should do the same. "Come on, let's go sit down."

Heading in, Lois found an empty pew that was far enough back so nobody would take much notice of them but not all the way in the back where two random people sitting way away from everybody else would draw attention. This was the antisocial section, but not creepy unknown people section. A few minutes after sitting down people had stopped filing in. Hearing the doors, Lois looked back and froze. Her father was walking down the aisle, and there she was with Lucy, holding her hand and walking next to him.

Talk about surreal. She remembered that walk. She'd taken Lucy's hand before they'd come through the doors, hoping to keep her from crying as they walked. Her sister hadn't really known what exactly was going on, just that their mom wasn't around and she really wanted to see her. The crying had started a little while later, and while Lois had done her best to stop it, she'd been a sorry replacement for their mom. That hadn't changed as the years went on.

Pulling off her sunglasses, Lois put them down on the seat before folding her hands in her lap. God, this was going to be brutal. She swallowed, and suddenly had an arm around her shoulders. Not looking over at Clark, she moved over a little bit and rested her body against his. This was a much better comforting gesture than the smile she'd gotten from him earlier.

Just then, the minister stepped up to the podium.

"Friends, family, we're here today to remember Ella Lane."

--

Wiping a tear off her cheek, Lois let her head rest against Clark. 'Time heals all wounds my ass,' she thought. The service was almost over. She just had to get through one last song being played before things would end and she could get to her father. Then she could talk to him, the future would change and this whole experience of going to her mother's funeral a second time would simply be something she'd done in an alternate reality that she would never have to remember.

Suddenly Garth Brooks' 'The Dance' came on over the speakers and Lois closed her eyes. She'd never had any interest in country music, to say the least, but this was one of the few songs she'd always known well. It had been one of her mom's favorites, not to mention it was about people that have died and how he wouldn't have changed things so as not to miss the events of his life. The irony was ridiculous.

She wanted to be strong. She liked being strong, because it kept her safe. Strength kept her safe from weakness. She didn't know how to be strong against this, though. Turning her face into Clark's chest, she allowed herself a couple muffled sobs before attempting to collect herself.

Damn, allowing herself those sobs had made it much more difficult to be calm and collected. She had to, though, or else this was going to take a whole lot longer than she wanted it to. Swiping at her eyes as the song finished, Lois sat up and smiled feebly at Clark, who attempted that comforting smile again. She still liked the physical comfort better. It was disturbingly comforting when he actually made an effort to be there for her.

"You ok?" She heard him murmur.

"I knew it was going to be tough to do this, but I now envy myself when I was young. I know I was only six and it may not have been the clearest memory, but being distracted by Lucy and not remembering the majority of this event was a blessing in disguise." In theory she wasn't going to have these memories long. Hopefully she'd be rid of them sooner rather than later, but having them was just about the most painful thing she could remember.

"I don't envy your situation, but I do envy your strength. To go through one of the toughest days of your life all over again... well, I don't know that I'd be able to do it. I imagine this is not unlike emotional torture."

"Something like that, yeah." Sighing, Lois scrubbed at her face a moment. She watched as the General stood up, her younger self and sister in tow as they walked up the aisle. She partially hid her face as they passed, burying it in Clark's chest. Distracted, Lois determined that if she ever just had a guy in her life whose sole purpose was to be there so she had a chest to bury her face in, Clark would get the job. It didn't require him to do much, but somehow he did it well.

Wiping her face across his chest, Lois pulled away and smiled up at him. "Thanks."

"Not a problem. I always like to use my sport coat to dry my own tears, too."

Lois smiled, almost against her will, before breathing deeply and shaking herself a bit. "So, time for the reception."

"Not the burial?"

"No, that was a family only thing before the funeral." Lois stood up and stretched her back and shoulders out. "The reception's in the basement. Let's just follow everyone down there."

"Weren't you wanting to stay incognito?"

"Yeah, so?"

"Just checking, because you have a penchant for not being incognito. Say, what do they have for food at the reception? I haven't eaten since morning in 2015."

Rolling her eyes but realizing she was hungry too, Lois picked up her sunglasses and stuffed them in her pocket as she made her way through the church to some stairs. They followed a few of the other stragglers to the basement, Lois doing her best to not draw attention to herself as she wiped away a couple residual tears. She looked back over her shoulder to make sure Clark was following her, which he was, before walking into the groups of people mulling about.

Grabbing a roll off the food table, Lois took a big bite and looked around the room. She didn't recognize most of the people, and those she did recognize were only vague memories come to life. She spotted herself sitting with her sister after a moment, a plate of food in front of each. After a second a dark haired woman was putting a blonde girl down next to her with some food of her own, and it struck Lois that it was Chloe. It had to be. How was it that such an innocent looking little girl could grow up to be such a monster?

Turning away from the scene Lois grabbed another roll as she finished off the first. She took a glass of water from a lady behind the table, smiling at her for a second before taking a sip and turning to Clark. He was also eating a roll, though his had been torn in half and had a piece of ham in the middle. She'd been too preoccupied to notice the meat.

"Penny for your thoughts?"

"My thoughts are at least worth a dollar, Clark." That had been more a reflex answer than her actually paying attention to what Clark was saying.

"I was hoping I could get them at 1993 prices. I imagine they are cheaper now than they are in 2015." Clark grinned at her, causing Lois to roll her eyes before smiling a little bit at his goofiness. He could always disarm her seriousness when he needed to, or at least when she didn't mind him doing it. This was definitely one of those times where she could use a break from her own thoughts.

"Yes, Clark, inflation caused the price of my thoughts to go up in the ensuing twenty-two years. Unfortunately for you, though, I'm still charging future prices."

"Good thing I always keep cash on me."

The rest of the reception seemed to pass somewhat quickly, and Lois attributed that to the fact that Clark kept her distracted most of the time. They met a few people, giving fake names and saying that they were boyfriend and girlfriend and she'd known Ella in college. Since she knew some of the things her mom had done in college she'd been able to make it work without any problems.

Now if only she could get a few minutes alone with the General and change the future, she'd be all set.

She'd been watching him discretely throughout the reception as he spoke with people and only kind of paid attention to her smaller self, as well as her sister. Already it had been her job to take care of Lucy and make sure that she was ok. From the day their mom had died there had been a chain of command, no matter their age, and she was still young enough at this point to try and be a good soldier. By the time Lucy had been shipped off to boarding school Lois had been sick of it.

She took a sip of her drink as people drifted around the room, about half as many as were there at the beginning of things. She'd be more comfortable doing what she needed to do when more of them had left so she could be sure they weren't interrupted. Her dad was as stubborn as she was, so talking him out of blaming others for her mom's death wasn't going to be easy. It was going to take one hell of an effort, really, and in her life she'd never really gotten him to believe something he didn't want to, but maybe he'd be more pliant on a day like this.

A little while later, most people had left and her father was standing alone. Lucy had fallen asleep in her chair and her younger self was with Chloe, having run off to do something together. After a nod from Clark, indicating that he would run interference while she did her talking, Lois made her way over to her father. "Hi."

He looked over at her, and had she been somebody that hadn't grown up with him wouldn't have noticed the surprise in his eyes. After her mom had died he'd been stone faced, rarely doing much smiling, frowning or any other kind of facial expression. She'd had to figure out what every squint and movement of the eyebrow meant just to know what he was thinking most of the time. His nondescript answers to most things had rarely been any help.

The surprise, which she attributed to her looking like her mother, was gone a second later. "Hello."

She held out her hand. "I'm Zoe Reynolds. I'm really sorry for you loss. Ella was... well, she was Ella."

Her dad offered a tight smile. "I know what you mean. How did you know Ella?"

"We were friends for a couple years in college before drifting apart. We would still send a letter now and then until about a year ago, actually. I was in town on business and saw the announcement, so I took a couple days off to come to the funeral. I wanted to make sure that I got to give my condolences personally, too."

"Well, I appreciate that."

"How are the girls handling things?"

Sam eyed her for a moment, and she wondered if she'd gotten too personal too quickly until he answered. "Lois is all right. She's strong, stronger than she knows and probably stronger than she thinks she is, even if she is only six. She takes after Ella in the regard. Lucy's young, and all she really knows is that she wants to see her mom. I don't know how to explain to her that her mom isn't going to be around anymore."

"My mom died when I was young," Lois said, clasping her hands behind her back to stop from wringing them. "I was eight, and my little sister was four. She was kind of in the same boat as your daughter Lucy is. My dad didn't know how to handle two girls; my mom had always been the one to know what we liked and all that sort of thing. When she died my dad just kind of took a hands-off approach to child rearing, only telling us when we did something wrong, which was not an infrequent occurrence.

"I wish he wouldn't have done that. He had so much to offer as a father. I remember before my mom died, he was always smiling and happy. Afterwards, though, he kind of lost himself. When she died he was never able to move on, and still hasn't. I think my sister and I were reminders of her. He didn't even keep in touch with family. I recently got in touch with a cousin I didn't remember having, and I really wish that I could have known her my whole life because she's one of those people that makes an impact on the world."

"Look, I appreciate your story..."

Lois interrupted him. It was the only way she could avoid him closing down and walking away. "Ella told me about you. I know it will be tough, and I know it will hurt, but be a father to your girls. I know that you're a soldier, and that's what you know how to be, but be their father first. Ella may have known all their secrets and all their likes and dislikes, but you're all they have now and you have to be there for them. They need their dad, and they need their family. If... if you can't be what they need, then let them stay with somebody who can.ཁ

Sam goggled at her. "Who are you?"

"Like I said, a friend of Ella's. We were very close, and while we didn't ever see each other anymore she wrote the details in our correspondences. I've been in the situation your daughter Lois is in." Boy, wasn't THAT the truth. "It's tough. She feels like she has to be a replacement mom for her little sister, and that's not a position anybody should have to be in. You're the only one that can save her from that, either by being a dad or making sure they're with people that make sure she isn't in that position."

"Are you suggesting I send my girls to live with other people?"

"I'm suggesting you do what's best for your daughters. I've been in this situation as one of the kids and it's rough. Make this as easy as possible on them. You can't just establish a chain of command and expect everything to work itself out. It doesn't work. If you can't be their dad instead of their general, then let them stay with people who can take care fo them. Moira and Gabe, maybe."

Her father's face soured, which was saying something considering his usual expression. "Gabe Sullivan is a bastard and the reason my Ella died," he growled.

"You're talking about the 'deal' they made, aren't you?" she said as she air quoted the word deal.

"If he'd have quit, so would Ella. But he couldn't be bothered to break himself of the God awful habit that cost me my wife, not until she was diagnosed with cancer, anyway. Once that happened he was more than willing to quit, and did."

"I know the circumstances are awful, but you can't blame Gabe for a choice Ella made. He didn't make her keep smoking, and if she'd really wanted to quit then she would have. Her deal with Gabe was just a fallback excuse. You know that, if not in your heart then in your head. You're angry at Ella for dying, but you don't want to be and you're putting that anger on the shoulders of others instead. It's not fair to Gabe to have all the blame laid at his feet. You know Ella would smack you upside the head if she knew you blamed Gabe for her death."

Her father shoved his hands in his pockets, frowning at the floor. "Yeah, she would have smacked me upside the head. She was never afraid to make sure that I did what was right." He looked over at her. "I appreciate what you've said. I needed to hear it, but I don't know who else would have said it."

Lois smiled. "It's too bad you, Ella and I didn't get to spend any time together. I think it would have been special, had we been given that opportunity." Just then Lucy woke up, and getting out of her chair walked over to Sam and held out her arms. He picked her up, and Lois smiled. "I'll let you guys be alone. Again, I'm very sorry, Sam."

Lois walked away, heading back over to Clark, who was sitting at a table and messing with his glasses. He looked over at her, looking curious as she sat down. "How'd it go?"

"I don't know. I think I got through to him, but you never know with Sam Lane."

"Well at least it won't-"

--

"Have you ever felt like you're saying things that you've already said?"

"How do you mean? Like deja vu?"

Lois scratched at the back of her neck, frowning. "No, not like that. Like you've had a conversation before... maybe not with the same words or even the same person, but you've had it and you're just saying something you've said once, twice or a dozen times before. Do you understand what I'm saying?"

Clark turned his head to look at her. "Is this some sort of odd commentary on our sex life?"

Lois laughed at his confusion. "No, of course not Smallville. We've been together for a long time and I've never once had a complaint about our sex life. It's never been anything but amazing. Sensational, even."

Clark nodded and smiled. "Good, glad. If you were trying to tell me something about how the sex had gotten stagnant I was going to be all sorts of confused, considering ten minutes ago you claimed you were coming out of a sex coma."

"Ah, the sex coma. It's my favorite kind of coma."

"Of the kinds of coma you've had, it's the preferred kind of coma. It's also the most flattering for me to hear about." Clark paused a moment, then frowned. "If you could avoid the other kinds of coma forever I'd be grateful, by the way. It's very stressful for one to have to watch his wife be comatose."

"I'll do my best to avoid it, Smallville. I doubt it would be a great time for Casey or Ryan, either. Our kids are tough, but they do tend to take after their father in the moping department. Well, Casey does more so than Ryan, who might be a little young to mope properly at two."

Lois thought for a moment. "It still strikes me as odd sometimes to see a young girl that looks like me and acts like you, even though Casey is eight. Apparently eight years plus a pregnancy isn't enough time to come to terms with the fact that I have a daughter, not to mention a two year old son."

Clark smiled and leaned over, kissing her. He curled up behind her, pulling her body flush against his. "I love you, whether or not you ever come to terms with our having children."

"Love you too, Smallville. See you tomorrow." Lois snuggled a little closer, just for the hell of it, before closing her eyes and drifting off to sleep.