"You...you want ME to dance with you? she asked me uncertainly, her eyes wide and her hands shaking, slightly yet visibly. So I still had the same effect on her. And she still had the same effect on me.
Our feelings hadn't changed at all.
"Of course...Portia DID say I could get another partner if I chose to...so why not?" I said, taking one of her delicate hands in mine and rubbing soft slow circles on the top. I couldn't believe how wonderful it felt. THIS is how it should be. THIS felt right.
THIS was love.
Jude hesitantly nodded, her face showing all her emotions:guilt,pleasure,regret,love. I slowly led her over to the dance floor where several other couples had begun dancing, oblivious to us. Jude really did look gorgeaus. The dress she was wearing was only half of it. Her hair had fallen out of place a little and dangled in front of her face. I gently brushed back the strand and tucked it behind her ear. She looked up stunned as I pulled her close to me. My arms encircled her waist as her arms looped around my neck. We locked eyes. We danced like that, silently yet saying all too many words, until the end of the song. As the DJ switched tracks, we never moved an inch. Then he put on "My Heart Will Go On" by Celine Dion. It was just me holding her close to me, taking advantage while I could. Finally she looked into my eyes and sighed.
"I shouldn't be dancing with you."she murmured as I just shrugged before glancing around the room. The fact that several other couples had moved onto the dance floor made the situation more bearable—more plausible.
"You're still my artist and a friend, Jude. Being married doesn't change that. It's just
dancing." I muttered as I watched her shake her head and laugh-yes laugh because it all
seemed way to unbelieveable.
"Is it?" she asked me as I felt my eyes darkened in that all to familiar brooding manner
of mine.
"Yes." I stated firmly as she just nodded. If I could pretend then so could she. She stepped on my foot accidentally, and I grunted. Okay, so she couldn't dance. I knew that when I asked her.
"Sorry." she whispered as I just chuckled. She could tell I was thinking about the time Darius had made her dress up in the silver space cadet outfit and learn a routine dance. Ahhhh! Post that up in her journal of most embarrassing moments.
"I guess dating Shay didn't improve your dancing skills much." I said jokingly as she just smiled. No, it hadn't. She stepped on my toe again just for good measure.
"I've missed this, Tom. So much." she said her voice cracking and her eyes filling with tears. I always seem to have that effect on her. But she must be an angel. No one is supposed to look that beautiful even when on the verge of tears. I stared down at her in amazement, that she had so bodly admitted that to me. I smiled down at her and wiped away the single tear that was rolling down her cheek.
"Girl-" I started, only to feel a slight tap on my right shoulder. I slowly turned my head to the right, ready to hit who ever was interrupting us. When I saw who it was I forced my self to pry away from Jude, while still managing to keep a hold of her hand, wanting to feel her skin against mine for as long as I could.
"Portia!"
Jude's POV:
Portia stood in front of us, glaring daggers through me, as if we had done something wrong. She
had told Tommy that he could pick a new partner while she was gone. So what was her deal? I just smiled
at her as if everything was going great- as if my heart was hurting from the loos of contact with his body.
"I think I can take it from here, Jude."she said as I let go of Tommy's hand before smiling again at
Portia and backing away in the same manner a criminal would from a police officer. It was just a dance for
heaven's sake. No reason to feel guilty. Now was the time to have some fun with her.
" Can you really, Portia? Are you sure something isn't wrong?" I asked her, still smiling a bright, energetic
smile.
" Yes I can Jude. And nothing's wrong. I'm wonderful. After all, I just got married to the man of my dreams. He's
all I've ever wanted." she said flashing me a smile and obviously trying to hurt me. It worked but I couldn't let her
see that. I watched as she looped her thin arm around Tommy's and I looked at him, expecting him to do something.
When he didn't I turned my attention back to Portia.
" That's great! I'm happy for you. Now, if you'll excuse me, I'm going to talk to Sadie." I said, smiling again.
When I came to be beside Tommy, he reached out and grabbed my arm. Was he finally going to tell me how he feels about me?
That he's sorry?
" Thanks for the dance." he said, looking down into my arms as if we were swapping secrets without words.
"Anytime, Tommy. Anytime." I said and turned around and walked off. I put a little extra sway into my hips as I
sauntered off, satisfied in knowing that in my descent toward the cake where I had been standing earlier, at least
two pairs of eyes were watching my retreating back.
Tommy's POV:
As I watched her sashae away, I felt my eyes burn. Knowing she was off limits just made me want her even more.
I was ashamed of it but...being married to someone else makes me love her even more.
"Where does she get off, talking to me like that! And at my own wedding reception too!Tom, I knew she had a thing for you but I never knew when I invited her-" she said waving her hand in the air for effect. When I heard the last part, I felt my head spin around my shoulders.
"It was YOU that invited her? What in God's name possessed you to do something as STUPID as that?" I asked her, trying to keep my voice at a low level. How could she, without even asking my opinion?
"Tommy...I thought it would make you happy! I know it's been hard for you lately...I'm not blind. I know you've missed everyone from your home. I did it for you." she moaned as if I was the one who had done something wrong. As I saw her eyes fill with tears, I felt the sudden need to comfort her. I felt awful for ruining her day...just because of a simple need and desire that was to late to fulfill.
" Portia." I told her pulling her into my arms to stop the tears from falling." We'll talk later..for now let's dance." I told her as I moved her towards the dance floor.
They put on a different, faster song and we began dancing again. She pulled me close grinding into me in a dirty way. I shut my eyes, praying to not cry.Not to cry for a broken future. Not to cry for Jude and her crushed dreams. Not to cry for everything that had gone wrong lately in my life. I finally opened my eyes after I had gotten control of myself. I quietly surveyed the dance floor. Derek was dancing with some red head, looking ...pretty horny. Ha, good for him! Everyone looked happy...except for one blondie who stood next to the cake, examining it. It was like she could feel my heart braking while I was looking at her- her head swiveled in my direction and locked eyes with me once again. She shot me a quick smile and swallowed the tears that were shining in her eyes. I couldn't decide what to do.
I was torn between my heart and my duty.
Luckily the wedding planner decided for me. She got over the speaker and calmly told people to find their seats for the toast and then after that would be the bouquet catching and then the seeing the couple off. Had it really been that long since the dreaded wedding?
Portia led me over to our seats and I settled into a comfortable position and prepared my self for the toast. Thoughts overwhelmed me over what I should say...this would be interesting.
Jude's POV:
I watched as the wedding planner motioned for silence—pointing now at the married couple as Tommy and Portia sat side by side smilingly, although the glass the planner had handed Tom shook visibly as if he were having problems deciding where he was going to go with this. Portia didn't look close to being intimidated. She lifted up her glass and faced the crowd pointedly.
"Tom and I both wanted to give a toast to thank all of those who were able to attend the wedding. We appreciate the support and the great outpouring of kindness and compassion. Now, I'd like to toast my husband." Portia reiterated as I cringed. Why was this so hard for me to sit through? Maybe, it was because I was afraid that it would break down whatever resistance I had left. Tom looked at Portia expectantly—avoiding direct eye contact as she spoke.
"Tom, I want to thank you now for being such a wonderful father to Amber. It has been a long, hard road, but you have weathered it well. I have high hopes for our future together. I love you." Portia said slowly as I closed my eyes. She had finally said it—'I love you.' It brought chills to my spine. Opening my eyelids, I watched as Tommy's hand lifted up into the air. It still shook.
"Portia." He said slowly as he glanced out into the room before letting his gaze return to hers—almost waveringly.
"You are a wonderful mother and a devoted woman—devoted to whatever you take on in life. I respect that tremendously. To you." He remarked as he tapped his glass up against hers before turning to face the crowd—lifting his glass toward us in a universal salute. Portia did the same and we all toasted them in return. It was apparent in Portia's expression and throughout my own thoughts that Tommy had left one important item out of that salute. He hadn't said he loved her back.
After we had eaten, Sadie appeared at my side and grabbed my hand.
" Let's go! It's time for the most exciting time yet- the catching of the bouquet!" she said her eyes lighting up with hope.
" Sadie...I don't know..." I told her looking at anywhere but her face. I just couldn't. I had just watched the man I loved get married. How is there any chance I'm getting married anytime soon. So I wanted no chance at getting the bouquet. None at all.
We finally made it outside and awiated the torture...
Twenty minutes later...
Portia stood readily—holding the bouquet over her head as if it were a damn medal of honor. I could feel her pride—the sunny exterior that mirrored what every bride should feel and look like.
"All the single women gather at the bottom of the stairs." The wedding planner called out in that high sing-song voice of hers that grated on my spine like fingernails going down a chalkboard. I felt Sadie pull me along beside her—into the mix-matched group of women that started giggling and wagging their brows at each other as they each boasted that they would be the one to catch the bouquet. I just pulled on my arm again—trying my best to get Sadie to release it, but I saw the firm resolve in the crinkles around her clenched jaw.
"I am not letting you stand on the sideline, Jude, so get that sexy little tush over here and smile for the camera." Sadie replied as I rolled my eyes at her candor. Yeah, classic Sadie. She'd smile for the Grim Reaper himself as long as he promised she'd be in the shot. I finally gave in—letting her pull me up near the front, but I didn't have to participate—I didn't have to try and catch the thing.
"Okay, get ready everyone!" Portia yelled as Tommy grinned slightly from beside her. Trying, I think to become the mirror husband—that perfect picture of what grooms are supposed to look like. I just stared down at the floor.
"You're not going to catch it like that." Sadie insisted as I just stomped on her toe to make her shut up. She stomped on mine right back and I grimaced.
Damn, why did us Harrison women have to be so darned stubborn? Portia laughed suddenly as she lifted up the bouquet.
"Here it comes…One….Two…THREE!" She shouted before vaulting the arrangement high up into the air. The scene became like one of those slow motion reels you
see in very important parts of epic movies. The flowers moved as if in milliseconds—gliding through the air like poetry, and I squinted my eyes in much the
same way that Debra Messing did in that movie the Wedding Date. Don't come near me! Don't come near me! I almost begged the air for release, but just like any
other fouled up moment in comedy history—the friggin' bouquet sailed straight at my head as if fate decreed some sort of law "Jude Harrison must marry next
available bachelor" As if. I tried dodging it, but several women dived at me and landed in a pile at my feet—leaving just me standing staring in almost amused
horror at the flowered arrangement that suddenly fell in my crossed hands—crossed across my chest for a reason. Obviously crossing your arms invites flowers
to suddenly appear in them like a trick out of a Houdini act. I would die if a rabbit suddenly appeared. I saw Portia look down at the mess and wince. It was
the first time I got a future look at how she thought about me—a threat. Tommy stared too, but with a different expression—almost a soulful one as if he couldn't
believe what fate had dished out at us. The taste was bitter wasn't it, Quincy. Sadie laughed and clapped.
"Step up gentlemen. Who wants to be the one to walk down the aisle with this sexy vixen?" Sadie shouted as she held up my hand as if I had just won a boxing match. I smiled tightly as several guys whistled—watching as Tommy stared at the men as if he wished he could shoot them all. Hmmm…maybe this wasn't so bad. I grinned at the guys—holding out my hand in invitation, and everyone laughed as they suddenly surged forth to lift me off the ground so that the wedding photographer could take a picture of us for the wedding album—the woman who caught the bouquet.
Tom's POV:
I felt my heart drop to my feet when I saw the bouquet gracefully slide into Jude's slender arms. It was as if God had marked this day as payback...me getting married to a woman I don't love, me getting to dance with the woman I do love, the woman I love catching the bouquet, the univeral marking of the next to be wed. In my mouth, there was a foul, bitter taste. For the first time, I was tasting bittersweet irony.
The men looked at Jude as if they were all getting stiff just looking at her...I wanted to kill them all. Even Derek had forgotten all about the red head that he had been clinging to earlier to stare at Jude's ass as it passed over their heads. I thought of the many ways I could kill each and everyone of them...quite creative ways and some completely disturbing. I was embarresed that I was feeling these things at my own wedding reception...but more ashamed that during the time I could have made a pass at Jude-really told her how I felt- I had been to caught up in the whole "she's only 17" scheme. I knew that was bull...I was scared. Scared of regection. Scared that Darius would find out. Scared that I would fall in so deep that nothing would be able to pull me away or stop me from completely taking advantage of her innocence. And yet, after all of my best attempts, That had happened anyway.
Like I said, Irony is bittersweet.
When the comotion had finally ceased and the wedding planner finally got to the end of her speech about what great hope she had for me and Portia, the end finally came. We shuffled out into the parking lot where a black tradional limo sat patiently waiting for Portia and me. She climbed into the backseat of the limo and it was finally my turn. My turn to get in the car that would lead me to the airport for us to board a plain to Toronto because I had a job to get back to and she had family to atted to...her grandfather was dying. We would have our honeymoon sometime later...hopefully not anytime soon. I turned and glanced one more time before climbing into my fate. I looked out into the crowd looking for her. When I finally spotted Jude, she was clutching the bouquet in her left hand and looking at me fiercly with tears in her eyes. I saw Derek approach her then ask her something. She nodded slowly, never taking her eyes off of me. Derek looked at me then and broke out into a smile. He waved at me quicly and I waved back. BUt more to Jude then to him. After everyone else had waved back, making the innocent mistake of thinking I had been waving to them, Jude's right hand lifted into the wind and turned in a fast motion. I studied it for a second, realizing she was waving good bye to me. Then, when I felt tears prick at my eyes, I climbed into the limo and shut the door. As we pulled off, I watched her until she dissappeared from my sight. And in my heart, I saw her waving back at me brokenly.
Jude's POV:
I watched Portia climb into the back of the stretch limo, waiting for Tommy to be seated beside her as her husband. Instead before he stepped inside, He turned around and looked at the crowd. His beautiful eyes finally rested on me. At that moment, Derek one of Tommy's new friends from Montana approached me. He studied me for a moment, taking in the tears in my eyes and my shaking left hand and my quivering chin. Then he asked me something I hoped no one would ask me.
"You love him, don't you?" He said, tenderness evident in his deep voice. He was a goodlooking man, but right now I had eyes only for Tommy. I nodded, unable to speak through my heartbrake and surprise. Was I that obvious?
"Yeah, I figured as much. But by the way he was holding you while you guys were dancing and the way he looked at you during the actual wedding, I'd say he loves you too." He said. He followed my gaze and looked at Tommy. His features broke with a smile as he waved at Tommy. Tommy waved back, but by this time he was looking right back at me. When the crowd had stopped waving at him, I raised my free hand and waved slightly. Then, he collapsed into the limo and shut the door. As the driver started to drive way I watched the limo in fascination. I still couldn't believe that in twelve hours all my dreams, all my hopes of a future with him were washed away.
"Hey, I can tell your pretty upset about all this shit...so here's my number. If you ever want to talk about it, I'm all ears. Anytime." he said with a kind smile. Maybe I'd take him up on that sometime.
"Thanks Derek." I told him as my eyes searched the crowd for Sadie. She was standing next to Kwest yet looking at me. I said my good byes to Derek and walked over to her. It was time to go to the hotel and sleep then in less then ten hours, we had a plane to catch. And by this time tomorrow, I'd be at work again.
With Tommy.
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Hey ya'll! What'd ya think? Let me know! Thanks for the reviews for last chapter! Can we try 47 reviews? Thanks again to Angel422 for everything! This was possible with only your help! LUV to you and everone reading this story! Blondenhot
Lots of love to all those who reviewed the previous chapters and glad that you are tuning in. Keep checking in. What happens when the wedding's over and it's time to return to the studio? Hugs and LUV to all. Blondenhot and Angel422
