Be Nepeta:
You are now a silly cat girl, drinking tea and watching Alternian movies. Sitting next to a grumpy red troll, the romcom portrays a girl who found out she's flushed for her kismesis, who has a secret black crush for the main girl's moirail. Karkat is deeply irritated over the fact that the kismesis is falling for the moirail and not the girl's platonic best friend. You giggle and lean on his shoulder.
"Uh, hey Nepeta, do you think you could move over so John could sit here?" Karkat asks. You sigh and scoot over. John runs over, cheeks full of crackers and mini cheeses.
"Hi Nepeta! Hiii Karkat!" John abruptly plants himself between you too, spitting crumbs as he speaks. You resist the urge to hiss. Instead, you get up and join a conversation with Equius and Tavros.
"Hello Nepeta. I see you have finished watching your movie."
"Uhh..hi Nepeta!" Tavros hands you a chicken nugget, which you munch on. Equius takes his time eating celery. There's a bit of a silence, if you can call it that. Equius opens his mouth to speak.
"Ne— "
"Nepeta!" Roxy drunkenly dashes down the stairs, sobbing. She jumps onto your back. You almost fall over, catching yourself at the last possible notice. Equius and Tavros back away.
"Roxy? What's wrong?" You pry her arms away. Roxy can't form a word, let alone breathe normally. You offer her a cup of tea.
"Yea-yea thanks Nap.'
"Nepeta." You silently correct. She follows you into the kitchen. Kanaya and Feferi are working on making desert in the cluttered area. Feferi gasps.
"Roxy? Are you okay, what happened? Oh, come here!" Roxy lets go of your hand, falling in Feferi's arms. Tears stain her apron.
"I did sumthing realiy stupid *hic*. Now dirky hates me."
"Dear, no one could hate you." Kanaya opens the oven, pulling out cherry tarts. It's a wonder she hasn't fainted, with many layers of clothing and a kitchen that could bake the tarts just by closing the windows. You hand her a towel.
"Thank you Nepeta. Could you be as helpful as to hand out these fried, thin sliced potatoes? I overheard Vriska complaining about the limited snack assortment." Kanaya, with one hand sifting powdered sugar, uses her other hand to pour the chips into a large orange bowl. Looking one last time over shoulder, you leave Roxy in Feferi's care. The large doom slams behind you.
"Heeeeeeeey Nepeta! Kanaya finally got around to getting that 8th snack, huh?"
"Hi Vriska." You roll your eyes. Vriskers is annoying as she is prideful. Her god tier pjs only give her more reason to brag as you leave the bowl on the coffee table. Vriska laughs and snatches your hat away. Holding it high in the air, the blue girl eggs you on. What she doesn't know is that you have grown accustomed to her antics.
"Nepeta? Oh come on, I thought you were fun!"
"I am. "
"Then what's wrong?" Uggh. You've heard that sentence a bit too much today.
"Nothing." Before Vriska can say another word, she finds herself face to face with Rose's bedroom door. You sink to the floor, relieved. Now, to get the full story on Roxy.
Be Rose:
"Nepeta?" You spin around in your chair to find Nepeta sitting by your door.
"Hi Rose! Do you know what's wrong with Roxy?"
"I know a bit. If you'd like, I can tell you more as soon as a certain nosy spider leaves."
"Aaaaaaaawwwwwwww."
"Is she gone?" I check my watch. It's not too long before Jane, Kanaya and Feferi reveal dessert.
"Uhh…she is now." Nepeta gets up off the floor, she was watching for Vriska's feet under the door, and walks to my computer.
"Well, If you needed to know, Roxy is in a very tricky relationship. I presume that matespritship is about the same as human love?"
"Mostly. There are a few diffurences, but we should be culturally simple and talk human." Nepeta takes a squiddle from my shelf and starts playing with it. I consider just how I am going to approach this without causing too much confusion. The cat troll waits anxiously.
"Well, let's say that Roxy has a… flushed crush…for Dirk. You were at Dirk's birthday party last year, so I'd imagine you know of Jake and Dirk's predicament. She has been pestering me for the last few minutes, along with Feferi. They both say that Roxy kissed Dirk, and Dirk didn't like it. Roxy said that she made a 'bad moave' and is in 'bag troble.'" I explain. Nepeta nods. "Kanaya, busier than the others, has also pestered me in order to keep up with everyone's satisfaction at the party. She says that someone else has gotten into that mess as well."
"Who?"
"Jane."
Be Jane:
What a coincidence, you are now Jane Crocker. There's an alarming amount of teenage drama going on around you, but you are oblivious to it all. Other than your crockertop freezing because of Jake's earlier freak-outs, this day has been going better than you thought it would. Meulin was right. After all that tension last year, Jake is finally opening up to you. As you two talk at the dining room table, you look over your shoulder to see Roxy sobbing on Feferi's shoulder.
"Janey?"
"huh? Oh, yeah yeah, go on." You turn your attention back to English.
"As I was saying, I'm really not sure whether or not to get back together with Dirk. He seems like he still is into me, but you can never be sure. After what happened next year….i'm so confused. You've never has relationship problems like this, have you Jane? Do you even like anyone?"
"Actually—"
"Nah, what a stupid question that was! I don't think you've liked anyone since that dirk thing before trickster mode! How could I forget? Well, assuming you are over him, I guess that just leaves the question of if I like him."
"I never really liked—"
"He is quite the hunk, if I can say that. He did look pretty relieved to see me. Passed out after the mere mention of friendship! He was content with that though.."
"Maybe you just forget about him. He just wants to be friends." Then you could go out with me.
"Still, though. I do feel fond of him. I think I'm going to go talk to him. If he doesn't feel the same way, I can live with that. There are plenty of other fish in the sea. Heh, Jade probably gets that. What is Jade up to anyway? She gets pretty tense if you mention Dave. I wonder if she still likes him. They were so cute together, Jade wearing his shades and Dave laughing his ass off over her impersonation. I hope Dirk and I can have such a perfect relationship. Except for the whole breakup. They argued all night and Dave ended up never coming back to the house. If Dirk ever did that I don't think I could live with myself. He kinda did last year but that was different. We never argued like they did."
"You did argue during the game."
"Janey! Stop looking at the negative side for once! I have a pretty good chance with Dirk and I'm feeling great about it! Unless Dirk still doesn't like me. Was that picture last year so bad…oh well, guess I'll never know if I don't ask. Jane, you have been the best helping me. I really owe you."
"Thanks" You mutter. As Jake gets up to leave, you sigh. You tried. Guess you'll never be Mrs. Jake Englis—
"Hey Jane!" Dirk runs in from upstairs, trying his best not to look upset. Gosh, EVERYONE is interrupting you today!
"Hello Dirk." You mutter. Dirk stops gasping for air for two seconds to look at you. You are practically one with the table from face-palming and bonking your head on it from Jake's stupidity. You know he's about to help, but in the back of your mind, a small part of your brain, it's his fault that Jake doesn't like you.
And Dirk knows it.
