Title: Words Get In The Way
Author: Fatebegins (http:// fatebegins .livejournal .com/)
Rating: NC-17 / M
Pairing: Puck/Kurt (Purt/Puckurt).
Summary: Kurt's insecurities lead to disastrous consequences.
Disclaimer: No Glee don't belong to me or to fatebegins, this history is not mine! But I have permission to post it here! (The original post: http:// community .livejournal .com/puckurt/449823 .html)
Warning: Futurfic, MPREG, This is crazy AU. Like honestly, the only things that remain the same are that Kurt was a gleek.
Review? Please? *puppy eyes*
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Noah glared at Milo, the greasy bastard was lounging on his couch, pressed khaki pants stylishly cuffed and blue collared shirt reflecting his tan.
"I just felt like I needed to talk to you, man to man" Milo offered, " Last time we didn't really say much and I just think that now that we've both had a little time to cool down. We can discuss this" he paused gauging Noah's reaction, 'Like adults? For Kurt's sake."
"What does Kurt have to do with this?"
"Everything." Milo responded, "Everything."
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"According to this," Kurt gestured to the male pregnancy magazine he was reading avidly, " I'm going to get so big I won't even be able to see my toes!" Kurt gazed at the slope of his stomach critically, it did seem larger now than it was a week ago. The baby moved inside of him, as if screaming indignantly 'I am not a fat ass Papa!', and he went still in wonder, even though he'd been feeling these little flutters for days now, each time it happened felt as magical as the first time.
Mercedes laughed, pausing in the middle of the pedicure she was graciously giving the pregnant man as he reclined against the couch, feet draped across her lap, " I can't imagine you being anything else than what you've always been! Rail thin."
"Slender, fashionably slender." Kurt amended, flipping to the next page, "Rail thin sounds like someone who is a struggling anorexic."
"Aren't you?" Mercedes asked playfully
"Blah Blah." Kurt droned.
"What, you wanna listen to some Ke$ha?"
"Oh Mercedes your wit astounds me." Kurt lifted his foot , studying the pale pink critically, "This looks so gay, maybe we should've gone with the fire engine red."
"Because that's not gay at all." Mercedes muttered.
"Hey! Don't you know it's bad luck to deny a pregnant person their wish? You don't do what I want and you'll die a single, bitter old woman. My fag hag forever!" he cackled maniacally.
"Blah, Blah." Mercedes dropped his foot and clicked on the television. "TMZ is almost on! I wanna know if Angelina is really turning Shiloh into a boy." She clicked the channels, excitedly "Damn, we've got a twelve minute wait." She moved to shut the television off and Kurt stopped her.
"Right, cause God forbid we watch the actual news, with, like, you know important issues." He said archly.
Mercedes just shrugged, getting up and wandering into the kitchen. She needed some snacks whenever she watched TMZ, the drama was riveting and appetite inducing. Perusing the pantry, she selected pop tarts, Pringles and hmm, why not make it a "P" night, popcorn. Throwing the popcorn into the microwave she called out to Kurt, "Hey Preggo, you want anything? But make sure it starts with the letter P, I've got a theme going."
Kurt wrinkled his nose in annoyance, then perked up at a thought "Pistachios? Do we have any of those mixed nuts left?"
"Yep!'
"And I want pepperoni pizza hot pockets!" For some reason, the baby was a big fan of all hot pockets, truly Kurt would be disgusted if he wasn't enjoying the cheesy, ooey gooey goodness as well. And it was all ready in under 2 minutes! Definitely couldn't beat that. His stomach growled, he was always hungry now a days. "Mercedes!" he whined, "Hurry it up, I'm hungry"
"Alright Piggy, calm down."
Kurt rolled his eyes, Mercedes either called him Preggo or Piggy , neither of which was very flattering to Kurt at all but he allowed it because she had been flying back and forth between New York and Ohio, just so he wouldn't be alone. He didn't know what he would do without her.
When Mercedes walked into the room and dumped his hot pocket on a plate , directly in front of him on the coffee table, Kurt burst into tears.
"Uh Kurt? Are you okay?" Mercedes watched with a funny look on her face, eating her popcorn slowly but now taking her eyes off of looked almost like she was watching a horror film were she didn't know what was going to happen next, except she was watching him,
Kurt threw his arms around her. " You're my best friend! I love you, you have no idea."
She laughed. "You better, that was also the last hot pocket and I wanted one. You go through five a day" She carefully moved away from Kurt, "Those hormones are finally catching up to you yeah?"
Kurt nodded, yesterday he had cried while watching an episode of Blue's Clues( which was strictly for educational research purposes okay?). When Joey had said it was time for so long and they would sing just one more song, Kurt had wailed at the unfairness of it all. He had left that television session slightly embarrassed and completely convinced to let peanut watch Blue's Clues.
"You know what will be fun?" Mercedes perked up at her own idea, "Lets go out for dinner today. No cooking, no stress and seriously, no more tears because Kurt, sweetie, I love you, but these crying episodes are freaking me the fuck out."
"Oooh, good Idea. I've been having such a craving for sesame chicken all day." Kurt agreed enthusiastically, then proceeded to stuff his face with pistachios. " The baby loves Chinese food, for some reason. All things Asian, really. At least we know peanut is not a racist so there's hope for you."
"Hardy-Har." She guffawed and then watched fascinated as Kurt happily poured pistachio's into his hot pocket. Okay, gross. Being pregnant was a strange thing.
Kurt looked up and caught the tail end of Mercedes's look of disgust. " What? I told you; 'what the baby craves the baby gets'." He shook his finger at her, "So cease and desist with the looks miss."
"Look at you, using words like crave and baby…" Her features softened. "It's weird to think that you're having a baby. Sometimes, especially on nights like these, it feels like we're back in high school and we're watching Degrassi and you're writing Mr. Kurt Puckerman all over your sketchbook." Mercedes winced realizing her slip up when Kurt flinched at Noah's name, 'Sorry…"
"No…it's okay. I was hopeless back then wasn't I? And you, you were an enabler!" Kurt giggled, "Remember how you got Finn to agree to steal Noah's letterman jacket? Oh god I remember how pissed Noah was when he found out his jacket was missing. I think Artie and I took more slushie's to the face that week than the entire previous year combined. Ironically, you the culprit ,got off slushie free."
"He was scared of my brother," Mercedes shrugged, setting the television to channel five, great TMZ would be on in six minutes, right now there were boring white guys in suits on the screen. Blah, blah, blah energy incentive one was saying. " Besides, you have to admit, Noah Puckerman's varsity jacket? Best birthday gift you ever got. Ever."
"Not arguing with you there." he smiled, nibbling on some popcorn he stole from Mercedes bowl, his hot pocket already devoured "When Noah saw it last year in my closet he just about had a heart attack. I just froze mortified. I was sure he would think I was some crazy stalker, but he didn't. Instead he just laughed till he cried." Kurt was lost in thought, he shivered remembering the laughter in Noah's eyesthat day, the teasing rough touches. " Then he fucked me wearing nothing but the jacket. Hottest sex ever. Hands down."
Mercedes dark eyes were wide in shock. Not at the kinky sex details of Kurt's life, nothing she hasn't heard, and seen, hey she was curious, in explicit detail before but because, holy mackerel, unless she was hallucinating, wasn't that Noah Frickin Puckerman, on the television screen? She raised the volume quickly and sure enough, the deep baritone that filled the living room was Noah's.
Kurt stopped talking immediately, startled blue eyes flying to the plasma screen TV where Noah was speaking steadily about the benefits of a circuit that would vastly reduce the energy costs of housing developments.
"No shit!" Mercedes cried, "Noah Puckerman is on TV!"
Kurt didn't know what to feel. His eyes poured over Noah, taking in every detail of his appearance, he held his breath and thanked God that Fox News broadcasted in high definition. Noah looked thinner, still built but definitely smaller than he had been before. His hair was neatly swept to the right side, it was still damp, Kurt could tell by the slight curls behind his ears, his jaw was clean shaven and the navy suit he wore fit him impeccably, the clean lines molded his tall frame perfectly.
He hadn't seen Noah in weeks and now suddenly there he was. Yet instead of the rush of tears he expected, he felt flooded with happiness, flushed and hot and…horny? Oh God. Stupid, stupid whacked out hormones.
Mercedes was looking at him curiously, "Should I leave you and the TV alone?" she joked
"Shut up" Kurt responded, not taking his eyes off the TV. Noah had been in New York all this time, or at least where he was now,according to what the bottom of the screen said. His emotions were jumping all over the place, he could feel the baby fluttering inside of him. Everything just felt so weird and surreal. In a few minutes, the press conference was cut off and the news caster was saying the usual farewells.
TMZ came on and Mercedes immediately forgot about her beloved gossip after taking one look at Kurt's face. She could see the emotions shifting and crossing in his eyes, this called for some food therapy.
"How bout we go to dinner now?" She suggested already getting up from the floor. "Golden China makes great sesame chicken and we'll miss the dinner rush if we leave now."
"Really?" Kurt brightened immediately, yes he was still sad about Noah but he was also pregnant,damn it, and hungry. He wanted that sesame chicken now, oh and brown, no make that fried rice, extra onions. "Let's go' he declared, feeling a renewal of energy.
"Uh Preggo?"
"Less talking, more walking." Kurt pulled his jacket on and opened the door.
"Maybe you should put on some pants first?"
Kurt looked down, Sure enough he was in black boxers and a red tank. Virtually in his underwear, his face heated up in mortification. "Oh god… Peanut is draining my brain cells."
Mercedes erupted in laughter.
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Burt hummed along with the radio as he did inventory at the garage. I got a feeling, that tonight's gonna be a good night, that tonight' s gonna be a good ,good night. Tonight's the night! Let's live it up! So maybe Burt wasn't humming as much as he was belting out, "I Got A Feeling" by the Black Eyed Peas, but he lived with Kurt. Enough said. Plus, doing inventory was painfully slow at best. It was a boring job but someone had to do it, and now that he didn't have Puckerman to do his grunt work, he was stuck doing it himself. The phone in his office rang , again, for the fifth time in the past ten minutes. Burt swore, what part of 'closed' did this idiot not understand? He dropped his clipboard in the middle of the aisle and jogged on over to the phone, lifting it from its cradle before the call could be sent to the machine once more.
"Hummel Tires and Lube?" Burt answered.
"Burt, uh, its me."
Burt raised a brow, "And me is…?"
"Come on"
"Alright, what can I do for you Puckerman? It's past nine, you know we're closed. Why call here?"
"I didn't want to call the house, in case…"
Burt was fed up, "In case what, Kurt answered? Suddenly afraid of a guy who put on a black leotard and performed a complete rendition of "Single ladies'?"
"No!" Noah denied, "Wait. ..what?"
Burt chuckled, "Listen Noah, you're a nice kid and all, always thought you were sharp as a box of tacks but, what in hell are you still doin' in New York? I told you almost a week ago, that without a doubt peanut was yours. Thought you'd come tearing in on the first flight to Ohio" Burt had hoped that's what would have happened, and not that he would admit it to the little punk but he'd been sorely disappointed when Puckerman hadn't shown up.
"I'm not in New York and what the hell is this peanut?"
"I call the baby peanut, makes it easier," he waved away Noah's reply and continued, " So you're not in New York? But I just saw some press conference, nice suit by the way, and it said it was taped in Manhattan, New York."
"Oh that" He sounded embarrassed, " that was pre-taped, we did that on Tuesday, the day after you called me…"
They fell into a silence and Burt counted the seconds that ticked by until Noah spoke again.
"Milo came by Monday night."
Burt tightened his fists, "I don't even want to guess what crazy lies that boy was spouting."
"Thing is… at first he stuck to the same story he was sayin' before. Told me he'd appreciate it, if I would give them, Him, Kurt and the baby, a chance to be a family. You know since a child's rightful place was with his parents." his tone had turned mocking as if he was mimicking what Milo had said, "He told me he didn't need me coming around, twisting Kurt's head up."
"Hope you knocked him flat on his lying ass!" Burt was outraged. Of all the things that boy had done, this was the worst! Now he was really glad that he had interfered when he had. If Milo had reached Noah before Burt had had the opportunity to talk to him… well, it really would've been the end of Kurt and Noah.
"Nope. I let him talk." Noah paused, "Funny thing is though, his story changed. You see, I remember what he said real well, I've played it over and over in my head . Now he's telling me that the first time was that night at his restaurant but that, that I know for a fact is a lie. I was with Kurt the next morning, he couldn't have been at Milo's place."
"Took you this long to figure that out boy?" Burt's voice was gruff with suppressed emotion. If this conversation was going the way he thought it was going then…
"I'm not a boy Burt…for gods sake's I'm going to be a Dad soon!" Noah replied.
At the word Dad, Burt's bluster deflated instantly . This is what he had been working for, hoping for. This is what his son deserved . He swallowed over the sudden lump in his throat.
"Burt, you there? You okay?"
"Yea" Burt's voice came out hoarse and he cleared his throat, '"yea I am."
"I'm in Ohio."
"Good."
"I'm in Lima."
"Even better."
"I'm outside of your house."
"Well, what the hell are you waiting for?" Burt was antsy, trying to ignore the rush of adrenaline he felt. He wanted to yell, jump, WHOOP, anything to release the ball of energy, of relief in him.
"I just… that's why I called. What do I have to do to get him back? The phone call… I said horrible things Burt and I swear none of it was true, I just wanted him to hurt like I was hurting, so I made things up."
Burt nodded, "I know and I'm still gonna kick your ass six ways to Sunday when I see you, you little bastard, but for some reason, my son is still crazy about you. I'd bet you anything he'll forgive you because he loves you, and he'll hear you out because he never stopped caring. Something you should remember," Burt's eyes caught on the framed picture of his wife, Kurt's mother, "Life is brief. You love hard. You hurt hard. Don't push the person you love away because you want to lash out. When you love someone Noah, and you listen good, you hear me?, you listen to them when they try to explain. You get that?"
"I know that I was stupid-"
" I'm not done." Burt cut him off. " My own dad told me this and since your Father's not around and you'll be joining the family anyway, I'll tell you now. Love is listening to someone even when they are not speaking. Don't let things get to the point where you believe some cracked out restaurateur over the guy you claimed to love and want to marry, alright?"
"Yes sir" Noah's tone was subdued
Burt chuckled, "It's not sir, just Burt. And just because I believe in you, and I want to make it just a smidge easier when you and my son finally do talk, I've got one more thing to say. I walked in on Milo and Kurt. From start to finish the kiss was about four and a half seconds. Kurt initiated it." Burt drew in a breath, this was the moment of truth, " Now knowing that, will you walk away or will you get out of your car and ring my doorbell?"
"I want him Burt, and our baby. ..I need them both."
"Good." Burt was pleased.
"So how do I get him back? What do I do? After all the shit I said, I don' think-"
"Honestly Puckerman, I think all you've got to do is show up." Burt smiled, "See you when I get , I'm fresh out of advice for you and I've got inventory to do, we can't all be hot shot engineers, can we? Some of us got a 9 to 5."Noah snickered at the end of the line, no doubt remembering all the Friday nights Burt had forced him to do this very task. Burt hesitated but for some reason felt like he should say it, "I'm proud of you son, real proud."
"Thank you - thanks, Burt" Noah's voice cracked, " and I'm so sorry that-"
"There'll be time enough for apologies later and ass kicking- I'm still gonna kick your ass. But for now, go put my son back together." He hung up the phone.
Burt picked up the framed photo on his desk, his wife smiled back up at him, eternally young even as his own face had lined and changed over the years. A drop of liquid hit the frame, and then another.
Burt wiped his eyes, his astigmatism must be acting up, and went back to cataloging the inventory.
Never let it be said the Burt Hummel wasn't a fucking great father.
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