'It's so hot.' Ichigo wiped the sweat off of his forehead.

It was summer in the kingdom and it was the King's duty to see to it that the harvest was good every year. His predecessors would send spies to gather information on the status of the crops. The agents would then pen a comprehensive report to give to the King, who would choose his next course of action based on the findings. But Ichigo liked to go see the fields himself. More than that, he liked to actually converse with the farmers and give words of encouragement. He didn't necessarily like being treated as an authority. He saw himself as equal to any of his people.

So today, he was actually tending to the rice paddies himself.

At twenty years of age, he had five years of combat training under his belt - three of which were on the battlefield. He was pretty confident in his physical endurance and stamina.

But it certainly hadn't prepared him for this rigorous labor.

'Farming doesn't suit you.' a deep, feminine voice teased.

A vein threatened to pop in his head.

It was bad enough having a wake up call that he wasn't as fit as he thought he was, but his companion always had something snarky to say.

'Well, you should try it.' he countered. 'Let's see you try to look fabulous as you tend to these weeds.'

He didn't want her to shoot back with a witty comment, so he left her side and went over to the lake. He crouched in front of it and washed his hands. It was such a warm day that even the lake was suffering. He was hoping it would be cold. He heard Rukia's footsteps drawing closer. Trying his best to ignore her, he then scooped up a handful of water in one hand and placed it over his lips.

'What are you doing, fool?'

'I'm drinking.' he barked back at her. He swore, this woman was so condescending all the time!

'Here.' she murmured, hovering her palm over the water cupped in his. She traced circles in the air with a rigid hand.

'What...' ruby eyes gleamed in delighted shock when he felt the water temperature in his palm drop.

'There.' she repeated, withdrawing her hand. 'Drink.'

He took a refreshing sip of cool water, chewing little chunks of ice between his teeth. He eyed her cautiously, but she was oblivious to his amazement. He wondered if all the celestial maidens had this arctic ability, but decided that he wasn't interested in the others.

He was interested in her.

Ichigo's daily life was plagued by random flashes of a vivid dream.

He would always be interacting with one woman. She was the spitting image of Rukia from ten years ago, although her hair was snow-white and her eyes were a much lighter shade of blue. Just like the woman he knew in person, the woman that seemed to be a figment of his imagination had powers that were icy in nature. She didn't have a zanpakuto, nor did she don the uniform of a shinigami. She was always dressed in a white kimono made of a sheeny fabric he had never seen before. She looked like a storybook character come to life.

He assumed it was because he was bitter.

His mind was playing tricks on him. That had to be it. He wasn't sleeping well either, so it was probably a lack of rest for his brain as well. Or maybe it was a side effect from the pills he was taking. Whatever. It didn't matter. He'd deal with it when it became a problem.

Wasn't it already a problem?

'What did you do?' Renji asked softly.

Neither of the Kurosakis answered because they weren't sure who he was speaking to. Orihime thought he was speaking to her husband, but Ichigo didn't see a reason why Renji would ask him that question. So the inquiry was left hanging in the icy air, amidst the frozen clinic room left behind by Rukia's rage.

'Ichigo, what did you do?'

'What?' the human was confused. 'What do you mean?'

'I mean, what the hell did you do?!' he lunged at his friend and grabbed him by the collar of his shirt. The orange-haired man's instant reaction was to grab at Renji's wrist painfully. The redhead didn't budge. His glare was piercing with pain. He looked as if he had been scorned by his lover. 'What did you do?! Why is she like this?!'

'The hell if I know! Renji, what the hell?! You sound crazy right now!'

'I... I'm going to go see the children.' Orihime muttered, hurriedly exiting the room. The tension was suffocating.

'She's my wife, you bastard. What have you done to her?!'

'Lower your voice, you fucking idiot.' Ichigo hissed back. 'Do you want your daughter to hear you acting like a lunatic?'

'Don't threaten me! Answer me! What have you done to her?!'

'I didn't do shit. You're the one responsible for her well-being.'

'Oh, being a smartass, are we? You fucking-'

'You know what I walked into? She took half a bottle of sleeping pills.' he reached out and grabbed his friend by the shirt, pulling him closer so that the two men were almost nose-to-nose. 'Half a bottle. She was trying to sleep. Because you weren't looking out for her, you didn't do anything even though you knew how sick she's been. If anyone's to blame here, it's you.'

'Oh, please. Don't pin this on me. Don't play me like you're fucking innocent. You love my wife, don't you?'

Ichigo stiffened. His breathing shallowed and he scoffed without thinking.

But Renji smirked tightly with anger. Those surprised brown eyes told him all he needed to know. He suspected that Ichigo had fallen in love with Rukia ever since they clashed swords. He felt it in Zangetsu's strike - a strong need to protect, a deep emotional investment in the woman. And the way Rukia was absolutely taken with him. How deliciously she called out his name, how her eyes filled with tears at the sight of him wounded on the ground, blood mixing with rainwater.

It made Renji mad with jealousy.

'You love Rukia, don't you?'

Ichigo swallowed. He searched his comrade's eyes for any sign of that maybe he was joking.

No. Renji was serious. He was furious.

'How...' How long have you known? 'How messed up of a question is that? Renji, please. Rukia's my friend.'

'You know, you brought she and I back together. Thanks for that. But you're also the reason we're torn apart now!'

'Renji-'

'You know what? She loves you too.'

Ichigo wanted to say something, but a senkaimon appeared.


'Rukia.' Hisana whispered with a mix of nervousness and delight.

As she glided over Karakura at the highest altitude she could, she managed to spot a figure in her likeness looking over the town from the hospital's rooftop. Hisana noted that her sister had much longer hair now, and that her wings were absent. This would be her first time seeing her long lost sibling after a ridiculously long time.

'Rukia.' she called a little louder, catching the attention of the younger sibling.

'Nee-sama.' Rukia mumbled impulsively. Her eyes were wide and disbelieving.

'Rukia!' Hisana tried not to squeal.

Nee-sama.

Rukia referred to her as Nee-sama!

Oh, it had been far too long since that magical title last graced her ears! Growing up, the pair had been inseparable. So without Rukia all this time, Hisana always felt a gaping hole in her heart that only her sister could fill.

She had been so lonely and guilty about her role in Aizen's failed experiment. She envisioned how she would apologize every single day in her head, imagining how Rukia would react and whether or not they could return to their sisterly dynamic after all that. Hisana must have composed a million scenarios, ranging from acceptance to rejection. And to think that this moment was finally happening, with Rukia still using the respectful honorific to refer to the older woman... It was looking pretty good! 'Ruki-'

'Nee-sama!' Rukia growled with the meanest snarl on her face. She extended her palm and charged a concentrated beam of illuminated ice at the floating figure.

'Rukia!' Hisana leaned to the side to dodge the attack. As if on command, Hisana broke out into a cold sweat then and there. She watched as the powered trail disappeared into the clouds before snapping her neck to Rukia to see if she was preparing for a second strike. To her surprise and relief, Rukia wasn't. Instead, she had her arms folded over her chest as she tapped her foot impatiently. A menacing scowled graced her usually soft features. Hisana gulped at the sight. Whatever came, she most definitely deserved it. Besides, she had been preparing for this moment for centuries now.

'Hurry up.' the wingless of the two narrowed her eyes.

'Rukia.' Hisana cleared her throat as soon as her feet touched the concrete. She retracted her white wings and tried to count to ten in her head to sedate the butterflies in her stomach. They were practically nipping at her insides now. 'I am very, very sorry for what I've done to you.'

'You should be!'

'And I am. I hurt you. I betrayed you. I thought I was protecting you, but I only destroyed everything you built. I will never be able to make up for any of that. And I will never be able to apologize enough for my sins against you.'

'Why didn't you believe in me? I told you that I wanted to be by his side. I told you that I knew what I was doing! Why didn't you believe me? You're supposed to be my sister, my confidante!'

'Because I didn't understand. I couldn't understand. Rukia, before then, I was never allowed to set foot amongst the humans. Humanity, feelings, love... They were just fairytales to me.'

'You should have believed in me!'

'I know.'

'You should have trusted me!'

'I know.'

'Why didn't you?!'

'I was scared, Rukia. I was frightened of the possibility that he would hurt you. He was human! Humans hurt each other, they kill each other. And I couldn't bear the thought of that - losing my younger sister to a man she was in love with. I didn't know if he truly loved you back, or if he saw you as a means to power.'

'I told you he wasn't like that! Why didn't you believe me?!'

'Nothing I knew of the humans at that point in time gave me any reason to believe that they were capable of such profound emotions!'

'Nee-sama, answer my question! Why didn't you trust me?!'

'Because back then, I thought you were too human! I thought that your vision was obscured by notions of love. I didn't think that you were able to see the situation objectively.'

'Whether or not I was "rational" enough was not your conclusion to draw!' Rukia's voice rose higher. 'My life was not yours to interpret! Those were my experiences that I lived through, not you! You're my sister, you should've supported me! No matter what, you should've been there for me!'

'I know, Rukia! I know!' Hisana was close to tears. 'That's why I left you in the Rukongai. I couldn't bear to be reminded of what I had done to you. I knew that I didn't deserve to be called your sister, and that's why I gave you up. I thought that anyone else who found you would be more deserving of that role. Because I...' she shook her head. 'I don't deserve that title.'

Rukia didn't respond. She felt a sharp tug at her heart, but she maintained her composure. It was so strange to see her sister like this, so... human. Not that Hisana had ever been stoic or emotionless per se. She was always warm and kind. But in all Rukia's memories of her, she lacked a certain fragility that only someone who had been through human experiences could possess.

It wasn't shocking. Rukia didn't have to ask her about it. She knew that this newfound likeness to humanity was because of her marriage to her ex-husband, who thought she was dead.

The thought was driving Rukia homicidal with madness.

'You know, at least you shared five years with your first love.' Rukia spat the sentence like a curse. 'I died.'

'But you both found each other again in this lifetime.' Hisana's tone was airy. The mere mention of Byakuya stirred precious joy within her. It was like his name was a trigger and now she was seeing the world through rose-tinted glasses. The situation now seemed romantic to her; for two lovers who had been crossed in their first existence to find each other again in another one. 'You truly are meant to be with that King.'

'He's not a King anymore.' the mother of one pointed a finger accusingly at her sister. 'Or didn't you know that?'

'Rukia...'

'He's a husband! And a father!' the last word was drawn out. 'And guess what, Nee-sama? I'm married and have a daughter of my own!'

'I-'

'Why did you bring me back?!' Rukia raised her arms and shouted at the skies, hoping Heaven would hear her. 'Why?! You should've destroyed my soul the minute it left my body! Why did you give me this second life?!'

'Ru-'

'I gave up everything!' her attention snapped back to Hisana. 'Everything!'

'I know.'

Hisana knew that there was nothing she could say to sponge her sister's anger, so she stayed still and listened to every word thrown at her. Rukia was in shock. It was as simple as that. She had just remembered all that she went through. She was in pain. She was angry, understandably so.

'I relinquished my position in Heaven. I willingly had sex with him, knowing that I was giving up more than my virginity - giving up my immortality! I gave up eternity for numbered days with him!'

'I know.'

'I did everything to be with him.' Rukia continued, sauntering towards her sibling. 'I did absolutely everything I could. Did you know...' she took her sister by the wrist and guided her palm on top of her womb. 'That he was inside of me? That he said that he loved me? And that his - our - baby was...' she trailed off but maintained eye contact with her sister.

Hisana observed those glossy sapphires redden and water. For the longest time, Rukia didn't even blink. She was scared that if she did, that a tear would fall and she would look weak. Eventually, she closed her eyes and tiny drops streaked down her cheeks. But she didn't cry any more after that. Her eyelids fluttered open slowly, revealing two cobalt orbs that were darkened by the fading light of orchid embers.

They stayed that way for a while. The two sisters looked at each other, not saying anything. Strange enough, it wasn't an uncomfortable silence. It was a serene interruption that allowed them to catch their breaths up to the present. It had been centuries since they last saw each other, and the realization that the mystery behind the creation of the Quincies was much more deeply tied into their past than Rukia initially thought before she remembered it all was a bit hard to swallow.

No wonder the Quinces were far too superior to other human beings. While Chad and Orihime were special with their own abilities, they weren't expected to live outrageously longer lives.

But the Quincies outlived generations of societies.

Of course they would. They were celestially endowed.

Rukia shook her head. She couldn't think about that. Not now. Her skull would crack with all this extra information.

'You can still be with him, you know.' Hisana whispered.

'No, I can't.' the younger sibling stated. She tried to sound matter-of-factly, as if the situation wasn't hurting her, but her relative could always tell when something was eating her up. The grief crept ever so slightly into her tone. 'I can't. Not anymore.'

'Why not?'

'He has a family.'

'But-'

'There's no "but" about it. He has a family. He's happy.' azure eyes lowered. 'It wouldn't be right for me to burden him with my feelings. Besides, I had a chance to be with him in this lifetime too. But it just wasn't meant to be.' she smiled sadly.

'How do you know he's happy?'

'Would he choose that life for himself if he wasn't happy?'

'I don't know. You know him better.'

'No, he wouldn't.' she sighed. 'Ichigo has always wanted to be normal. Orihime - his wife - told me that since he was young, all he wanted was to not see spirits. The only reason his powers amplified is because we met.' she shrugged. 'Had it not been for me, he would have gotten his wish to be just an ordinary man much sooner.'

'He's... Impotent?'

'No. He's still a shinigami.'

'Then what do you mean by "normal"?'

'A peaceful life. I wanted that too.' she added. 'I wanted that with him, but... Really, Nee-sama, it just isn't meant to be. I love him, but he's never felt the same way.'

'Where are all these assumptions coming from? How could you know that? Did he tell you so?'

'No, not at all. There's no need for us to talk. We've never really had to, to come to an understanding of each other. I could always read him pretty well. I thought he liked me, but...' she gazed up at the sky. 'Maybe you were right all along.'

'Eh?'

'Maybe he saw me as a means to power. Maybe he was grateful that I had given him power. And so he treasured me in some way, but... Over time, that disappeared too. I faded into the background. I somehow thought that when he looked at me, all he could see was me. That's how he made me feel. But gratitude is not love. I know that now. When he was able to acquire power for himself, I suppose I was useless to him.'

'That... That doesn't sound likely, Rukia.'

'He doesn't visit me. I always have to come to him. You know, when I became captain of my squad, he didn't even show up to the ceremony.'

'Maybe he was busy.'

'Sure.'

'You can come home, you know.'

Rukia laughed at that. 'Home? How? I have a family here. I have Ichika. I can't just leave her.'

'But you can't stay for her either.'

'I have to.'

'This is your life.'

'I've had two lives now.' she waved her hand dismissively. 'I've had two chances.' she paused. 'So has Ichigo. In this second life, he's found what he's always wanted.'

'Rukia, can you just humour me for a second? Why do you keep saying that this is what he's always wanted? I don't understand. I get that he wanted to be peaceful, but who's to say he can't have that with you? There are many ways we can live out peaceful lives. He-'

'A wife and child.'

'Eh?'

'A wife. A child.'

'Rukia?'

'That what he's always wanted - a wife and child. He told me so.' she turned her back to her sister. 'He told me he wanted to marry me and have me bear his offspring.' she stretched her arms up and arched her back. She thought that the movement would physically relax her. She felt the tears coming on again. Her voice didn't waver. She wouldn't allow it to. 'Umm...' though she had to take breaks. 'I guess he got what he wanted, right?' her arms fell to her sides.

'Rukia...'

'I just hate that I'll never be able to look at Ichika without thinking of Ichigo. It's bad enough that I can't look at Renji in the eye anymore. Even taking care of Ichika was mentally exhausting enough without these memories. I look at her and I find myself wondering how Ichigo and Kazui are. How their bond is like, how proud Orihime must be to have given him such a beautiful boy. Even so, I tried hard to repress my feelings. But now, when I see Ichika, I'll just think about my baby.' she bit her lip. 'My baby that never stood a chance. My baby that could be breathing, walking, talking to me. If I could talk to my baby, I would say that I'm sorry.' she sobbed but covered her mouth with her hand.

I'm sorry, Ichigo. I can't let you go after all.

It was horrible enough living day-to-day with her circumstances. Now equipped with the knowledge of her history, she couldn't fathom what it would feel like to get through the day without wanting to rip her arm to shreds. She was so angry, frustrated, and sad all at once. She dreamt of being with Ichigo. She wanted that so badly. But he made his choices, and she made hers. There was no going back from that. There were too many people involved.

And he made his choice.

He didn't choose her.

Why would she confront him? Why would she force her feelings onto him? What if he didn't remember? Or worse, what if he remembered but chose to feign ignorance? Is that why he was so angry with her? Was he pissed at her for trying to push a second opportunity for them to be lovers?

She didn't even care anymore. At least, she didn't want to. There was no use mourning. The least she could do now was not get in his way, or in the way of those who were depending on her for their happiness.

The whole fiasco was disgusting. There was no other way to describe it. She felt sick to her stomach.

'Rukia...' Hisana walked over and hugged her sister from behind. 'I am sorry. I love you.'

'Nee-sama...'

'I love you so much. You're my pride and joy. How can I be of assistance to you? How can I make things better? I don't want your forgiveness, and I won't ask for it because I know I don't deserve it. But please, I beg of you - let me be of assistance to you.'

'I've forgiven you a long time ago.' she admitted, turning around to face her sister.

Hisana blinked twice, dumbfounded. 'So then... Earlier, why did you fire at me?'

'I forgive you, but you totally deserved that!' she squealed, hugging her sister.

'I did, didn't I?' she smiled warmly. Her eyelids lowered sympathetically and the sisters shared a minute that was reminiscent of the early stages of their bond.

Back when Rukia was still training under Aizen and would return to her sister's side at the end of the day weary and tired. She would never want to tell Hisana about it so that the more mature of the two would have no reason to worry. But Hisana could always tell which days had fatigued Rukia more than usual, and which days Rukia had been more satisfied with her accomplishments. What they had was silent, almost telepathic communication. Even now as they were wrapped in each other's arms, it was like nothing had ever happened. No hatred, no resentment.

'What will you do now, Rukia?'

'I've got to get back. Ichika's headstrong, but she looks for me before bedtime. She can't sleep otherwise.'

'You've still got some time. It's only the afternoon.'

'I suppose. But I left quite a mess back there. I've got to find some way to explain my outburst earlier.' she rubbed her temples. 'Ahh... This really is a bad day.'

'Wait. You're heading back?'

'That's my plan.'

Hisana winced. 'That... You can't do that.'


'Exiled?' Ichigo choked.

'That's right.' Isshin folded his arms over his chest. He had just stepped out of the senkaimon by himself. He prefaced the encounter by saying that Kyoraku initially intended to give the news himself, but Isshin volunteered to do so instead.

After Ichigo married Orihime, Isshin went back to Soul Society. It wasn't out of spite, but he just felt like he was no longer needed now that his son was old enough to care for his sisters. He was also concerned about Rukia. When Isshin and Masaki first started dating, his only other relatable companion was Kisuke. And even back then, the ex-scientist warned that whoever he put his hogyoku had to be watched closely. Isshin never quite understood that, but he thought it would be wise to follow that advice.

Besides, it was about time he return to his shinigami roots.

'What did she do?!' Renji demanded.

'That's not for me to say.'

'Dad, please.' Ichigo was fighting a bubbling anxiety. 'You have to explain.'

'Actually, son, I don't need to do anything. This is a highly confidential matter.'

'Dad, you can't be serious.'

'Fine. I'll just... I'll just head back on my own.' Renji groaned.

'What? Renji, what?'

'Ichigo, just leave me alone.'

'She's your wife!' Ichigo failed to suppress a growl. 'She could be in danger! How is this not a big deal to you?! You should be looking for her!'

'You're right, she is my wife.' Renji snapped. 'So stay out of it!'

'Ichigo.' Isshin placed a hand on his son's shoulder. 'Stay out of this. This doesn't concern your family.'

Ichigo wanted to go off on both of them, but one look at his father silenced him. The old man was right. He was a family man now. He was a father, a husband. He had responsibilities. He had no business getting worked up over something like this, not if it didn't directly concern him. It would be irresponsible. He'd be allowing Kazui to feel the same loneliness Yuzu and Karin felt whenever he disappeared for an unspecified period of time.

'Dad...'

'Yeah?'

But it was Rukia. Rukia wasn't supposed to disappear like this. Rukia was always supposed to be around. She made the universe whole, she turned the Earth on its axis. Without her, without her, without her... There was no "without her"!

'You're right, Dad. I'll, umm... I'll step away from this one.'

Impotence.

He was powerless yet again.

He watched wordlessly as his father and friend disappeared behind the sliding doors of the senkaimon. Once he was alone in his clinic, he trudged up to his old room - Kazui's room. Yuzu and Karin were at university, so he knew they wouldn't be there.

It was nostalgic to enter his old room. He thought of Rukia living in his closet, of how much less lonely he felt knowing that that woman was a few feet away from him during the night. She gave him more than just power. She gave him companionship, hope, wisdom.

Love?

That was one he could never figure out.

'Hey, little guy.' Ichigo picked his son up. He cradled his child in his arms, bobbing him up and down soothingly. Kazui clung to his father like white on rice. The paternal bond was always a stronger one to this little boy. He loved his mother in equal measure, but his attachment to his father was unrivalled.

'No, Ichigo...'

He shut his eyes and held his child closer. Why? Why did this have to happen again? Why was Rukia in his head once more? Why now? He wasn't in the proper headspace to deal with it right now.

'My baby! My baby! Please, don't... It hurts... My baby...'

'Otou-san, can I play with you and Aunt Rukia later?'

'Ichigo... Our baby...'

'Otou-san, why are you crying?'

'Sure, Kazui.' he managed. 'She'll be back.'

'Ichigo, we have a baby.'

'She always comes back.'

'Sayonara, Ichigo.'


A/N: Thank you so much to everyone supporting this story!

Thank you to RukiYuki, blissbeat, BinaLove, Shirayuki992, Anon, , Cate-Deriana, NieveDrop, achalida, han-ichiruki, and jobananansan!

Guest, I'm so glad that this story was able to stimulate such an emotional response from you! Unfortunately, you have misinterpreted the text and made a few assumptions too many.

blissbeat, that is exactly what Rukia is feeling. Your interpretation is spot on. Rukia's wings used to be white, but in this lifetime they've turned black. That will be important later on!

Shirayuki992, I feel like at this point, Rukia is generally mentally stronger. I hope this chapter clears up a lot of her inner turmoil. She's grieving, but she respects Ichigo and the people around them too much to do anything. Ichigo's recollection is slower because Rukia was the one who experienced the shock of seeing him with a family so suddenly. On the other hand, Ichigo made a conscious decision to get to where he was. But his feelings are still ambiguous for now and I'll delve into them next chapter! The hogyoku and Urahara will play a part in this story. Thank you so much for your continued interest!

malea anne, Ichigo will remember very crucial parts next chapter!

Cate-Deriana, thank you so much for giving this story a chance despite the dodgy beginning! Really grateful for your support.

achalida, Ichigo experiences a different kind of pain right now. He's trying really hard to move forward with his life, whereas Rukia has been more openly unhappy about it. She's not only lost the love of her life, but she has all these obligations as a Kuchiki and a captain. Those will play a part later on! And thank you so much, love you too always!

jobananasan, HAHA oh my gosh you're hilarious! And no, I don't take that as flaming at all. I can see the comical side of it now. Renji did indeed see her wings! Rukia's powers and the fate of her gigai will be the in the first section of next chapter. You're asking all the right questions.

Thanks so much, everyone!

Working hard on the next chapter for you guys!