Alright, so driving is boring. I'll skip straight to when I got to the place. Zone was in the middle of a long, crowded block downtown. I somehow got lucky and found a space on the street, so I didn't have to go hunting for a parking lot. Sweet! As I was plugging the meter, James came up behind me and said, "Hey! Kendall!"

"Yeah?" I answered without looking around.

"'Sup?"

"Just plugging the meter." I put in the last coin and spun around. James had spiked his hair a little bit. He had on a black, short sleeved button-up and dark pants that were borderline too tight for his age. "Aren't those pants borderline too tight for you age?" I asked.

"Dude," James said in defense. "Don't talk about age. You know how rough my 30th birthday was?"

"I got over it."

"Worst day of my life. I've been legally dead for a year now."

"You'll get over it. So how's this great club?" We started to head towards Zone.

"Casual, very casual. Don't worry. I come here all the time. Decent gay scene, but it's not a gay bar." He waved at the bouncer and we went in no problem. For a club, it was pretty bright inside. There was loud music playing and a lot of people were standing around, a few dancing, but in general the atmos was relatively cool and laid back.

"Over 30 club, huh?" I teased. James made an irate face at me. "No! Plenty of young guys!" He snapped.

"What do you want?" I asked him as I laughed, walking up to the bar.

"Florida!" James shouted. "And make it sparkle."

"Huh?"

"They'll know."

"Ooooookay," I took his word for it and ordered him a "sparkling" Florida, and just a Coors for myself. The bartender rang up my order and gave me the drinks. As I paid, I saw a sign on the countertop that read, "Throwback Saturday Starts at 7pm!"

"What is this?" I asked the bartender.

"We're playing older songs after 7 tonight."

"How old?"

"Uhhh," she took a laminated list out from under the counter. "Looks like we're starting off with Lady Gaga…" I interrupted her right there and ran off to James with our drinks. He was sitting at a high table.

"Oooo! Thanks." He took his drink and sipped it gently. After he smacked his lips, he looked up at me and raised one eyebrow. "What's wrong with your face?"

"UH. NOTHING," I said. When they start playing hits from our hay day, James would definitely flip out. I wasn't sure if that would be a disaster or extremely hilarious.

"Whatever you say." He took another sip and glanced around the bar. "I think that guy over there has been eyeing me."

"Cool?"

"Yeah, very. Uh, anyway, Kendall," James said. "That was hilarious, hearing you talking to Logan earlier."

"How so?" I asked, sensing a potential insult.

"'I love you babbbbyyy!'" He mocked. "You've gone soft."

"No I haven't. Or I always have been. I dunno!" I couldn't help but laugh about this conversation. "He is my baby and I do love him. I'm sorry you've never had a nice enough relationship to have names like that for someone."

James frowned and took another sip of his drink. "I guess…" he said very softly. Maybe we were going the wrong direction in our discussion. Trying my best to change the subject, I asked "So what does 'make it sparkle' mean?" I always thought I had bar lingo down fairly well, but that was news to me.

James flipped the happy switch back on instantly. "They kick up the alcohol content," he said. "I like it strong…just like me." He flexed his bicep and made a, "wh-BAM!" sound. I rolled my eyes. Same old James. He caught the attention of the guy he mentioned, over at the other table, and tipped his chin to him. "Yeah, he wants tickets to the gun show alright," he said coolly.

"I thought we were going to catch up, not catch guys."

"Can't we do both?"

"I guess. Uh. But not me."

"I know, I know. Monogamy and all that shit." James finished his drink already. He raised his hand to the bartender and made a signal. Shortly thereafter, she came over with another drink. James thanked her but she basically ignored it. I looked down at my half-full beer. "So what's Carlos up to these days? You see him ever?" I asked.

"Yeah, sometimes," James stirred his drink and took a little sip between speaking. "He's still in that reggaeton band, Pepitos or whatever."

"Cool. He like that?"

"Yeah."

"And his love life?"

"Dating some chick who's also in the band."

"Neat." I nodded to myself as took a big swig of my beer. Whatever song was playing had a nice beat to it. "So why can't you settle down?"

"Me? Why would I?" James asked. He went ppsshh and rolled his eyes. "James Diamond doesn't settle down…"

"Just earlier you said you would have married me," I said monotonously.

"Well, yeah, uh, that's you."

"What do you mean?"

"I'd settle with you, but not anybody else."

"Ah…" I made a tiny, bittersweet smile. This made me feel kind of sad. Sure, I knew that James always had a crush on me; we had experimented in the past. We explored our sexuality together but left it at that. I never realized he wanted a life with me. For a moment, I let my mind wander and imagine what things would be like if I was engaged to him instead of Logan. But then it occurred to me that James is a whiny, screaming queen who is obsessed with his image and needs constant attention. My fantasy died quickly.

"What?" James asked, snapping me back into reality.

"Nothin', that's all." I finished my beer and James offered to order me another. Why not? I handle my alcohol alright. He waved down the bartender and she brought me a second drink. "Thanks," I told her.

"No problem, doll," she replied. After she walked away, and asked James, "What's up with that?"

"Up with what?"

"When you thanked her, she ignored it. But she answered mine."

"Oh, yeah. Well, she doesn't know you're gay."

"Huh…interesting."

"Want to go for a smoke?" James asked out of the blue. "You can bring you booze out on the patio in the back."

"Sure." We got up and he led me through the crowd of people to the backdoor. The porch was a screened in joint with a couple tables and some ceiling fans that were turned off. The sound from the inside was drastically reduced once we came out. Only a few folks were standing back there, all just getting a smoke break. I took out my cigarettes and offered one to James, which he of course took. We lit up together and stood in silence. A young woman who was smoking with some guy looked over her shoulder at us. She double took and looked again. The guy came close to her ear and I heard her say, "I think those guys are from that band." I did my best to ignore it, and hopefully James didn't even notice. I don't know how arrogant he is about Big Time Rush anymore, and either way I didn't need him causing a scene.

"Uhh, sooooo," I said loudly. James looked at me and raised his eyebrows. "Have you like, dated anybody at all recently?"

"Not unless you count one night stands."

"That's not good."

"God, Kendall," James barked. He took a long drag on his cigarette and kept talking with smoke pouring out of his nose. "You've really become boring. What happened to my best friend?"

"I'm still here!" I said, annoyed. "I've just gotten better with age."

"You seem like a grumpy old man."

"Shut up," I snapped. "I'm not. I still have plenty of fun, only now I don't risk my life as often."

"Nooooo fun!" James bitched. He rolled his eyes and took another drag.

There was a big digital clock over the entrance back into the bar, and when I happened to turn around, I saw that it was 7. I found enough courage in the rest of my beer. Just as predicted, Paparazzi began to play over the speakers.

"Oh, wow," James said. He listened to the music inside. He's no fool. "Do you hear that?"

"Uhhh, yeah," I hesitated, waiting any minute for James to start complaining about feeling old. "It uh, takes you back, huh?"

"Fuck yeah it does. Come back inside!" Unexpectedly, there was a grin on his face. I put my cigarette butt out in an ashtray at a nearby table and said, "I dunno man." James grabbed my arm and said, "Where's the cool Kendall, huh? You say you're still fun, but you don'cha prove it, huh? Huh?" I didn't get much of a chance to answer as he pulled be back inside. The speakers were thumping with last decade's music, and a lot of the club-goers sat down for this. James dragged me to the area where and people that were dancing stood. He started dancing, mostly shoulders and hips, singing along to Lady Gaga's words; "I'm your biggest fan, I'll follow you until you love me! Come on, Kendall! Don't be a downer!" He put his back up against my chest and shimmied to the music. I laughed and couldn't resist the chance to be dancing with him again. It had been a long, long time since that happened. I began to wriggle along behind. James kept on singing; "Baby there's no other superstar you know that I'll be-" We faced each other and both sang, "Papa, paparazzi!"

Here we had to stop and just laugh. In my head, I envisioned us a teens again, sneaking alcohol from our parents and getting slammed in the basement. These memories hadn't come up in ages. James leaned against me and put his arm around my shoulders. "Oh man," he said between choking giggles. "I miss partying with you."

"Me, too," I admitted. We kept dancing until the Lady stopped. I was beginning to loosen up, and watching James work his body like he always did put a smile on my face. Well, we're both still in really good shape. I mean come on! We aren't that much older than when we were in the band. It just feels that way. To be perfectly honest, James was getting better looking the older he got.

The next song that played was familiar. Very, very familiar. As soon as it started, James and I both grabbed each other's arms and screamed, "OH MY GOD!" like rabid fan girls. James started to move his body as he sang, "All this talk about being in love, I could never get into the party…"

We danced, sang, and laughed along to one of our best songs ever. I had forgotten the moves that we once danced on stage for Confetti Falling, but James conveniently happened to remember. Ahh, good times. My memories kept going back to fond places. Being on the road. Rehearsals. A thought or two even found my first kiss, which was with James back in middle school. If I wasn't so preoccupied with having fun, I likely would have become very sad.

"Ohh, yeah yeah! Don't get any beeetteerr!" We sang. Other people were dancing but not to the level of excitement that we had. We hopped around the dance floor like morons until the song stopped. Then we sat down and caught our breath.

"Man," I said. "Never thought they'd play that."

"I miss being with you and the other guys," James said, oddly poignant. "I really miss those days. I hate time going by."

"We can still hang out. Let's make it happen. Just 'cause our lives are moving doesn't mean we need to stop being friends! We can come here again next week. And see if Carlos can, too. And Logan will probably…ahh, I really should get home to him."

"Already?"

"He doesn't feel well, James."

"Okay, okay. Forget I asked. I'm gonna try to pork this guy over…" he squint around for the dude he had been looking at earlier, but to no avail. "Damn it. Well, there will be more. There will always be more for James Diamond."

"Oh, please."

"Shut up, Kendall. At least I don't have eyebrows like that."

"Hush!" I snapped. "Now, I gotta run. Let's stay in touch. Promise?"

"Promise!" We hugged goodbye and I was on my way. As I drove home, the bittersweet memories flooded my head, since there was no ecstatic noise or movements to drown them out. I thought about my life in the band. As I've said before, I don't miss the famous life; I miss the closeness of my friends. Life has a way of separating all of the things you love without giving you time to realize it. Suddenly, you're in a different place with a different person, and the ones that came before mean nothing. That is of course until you remember them. But the minute you're alone with your old buds, suddenly time rolls back and it's like you're young and idiotic again. James, unfortunately, seems to have stayed young and idiotic. I wondered when he would settle down. If he would settle down. Briefly, it occurred to me that he might never. I just hoped that he wouldn't do anything too stupid, but there was nothing I could do. I didn't especially want to go home so early, and I'm sure James would be out 'til after midnight, but you know; grown up Kendall has grown up things to do!

I came home very quietly and tried my best not to wake Logan up. The condo was quiet. I crept into the bathroom and washed up as stealthily as humanly possible. Then I took off all of my clothes and slipped through the bedroom door. Logan was snoring softly. Sure, being in the party scene was fun again; and it really was; but nothing beats coming home to my Logie. I crawled under the covers carefully, but I must've shaken the bed too much. Logan grunted and rolled over to face me. He yawned and sniffed a few times. "Been drinking…" he said quietly.

"I'm allowed to."

"You have fun?"

"I really did. We're gonna go again next week, and you come, too. We'll get Carlos also."

"Cooool," Logan said with another yawn. I put my arms around him and gave him a soft kiss on the forehead. "How's your head, baby?" I asked.

"Better but still bad," he answered very cutely. "Thanks for asking." He hugged me and soon fell back asleep. I closed my eyes and thanked God for having a great night. I thanked him for giving me such amazing memories to look back at. I thanked him for having wonderful friends. Most of all, I thanked him for the love of my life who snored against my chest.