A/N: Welcome back! I know you're all eager to see how everything builds after what happened last chapter, so I won't make you wait any longer!
Disclaimer: Bleach is still not mine.
Holding On
Chapter Nine: Back on Track
Most of Saturday was spent at Urahara's shop, with Ichigo exchanging several more semi-awkward apologies with his friends. Uryuu apologized for his behavior, and even Keigo apologized for some of the things he'd said earlier in the week.
Once everyone had gotten it a little out of their systems, Ichigo demanded that they all stop apologizing. Afterward, the group stayed, the conversation becoming progressively easier as the day rolled on.
Ichigo hadn't enjoyed time with his friends that much since the first week after the end of the War – if that.
Eventually, the day became dark and everyone acknowledged that they should probably call it a night.
"Now, Ichigo," Kisuke called as the group gathered just beyond the entrance of the shop. Ichigo looked over in silent curiosity, and the shopkeeper said, "I want you to come in after school on Monday, okay?"
Something between a groan and a sigh escaped Ichigo's mouth before he said, "Yeah, alright. But I'll go home to change first."
Kisuke waved his fan at Ichigo with a laugh and replied, "Of course, of course! Now go on, enjoy the rest of your weekend!"
As the shop door slid shut, Uryuu turned to Ichigo and said, "I still can't believe you actually took a job from him."
Shoving his hands in his pockets, Ichigo replied, "Tell me about it."
"Uh, Ichigo," Keigo began, his eyes downcast, from where he stood a few feet away.
Tatsuki cut him off, clapping a hand on his shoulder and saying, "He said 'no more apologies', remember?"
"I know that!" Keigo insisted loudly. He slumped again a moment later, but when he looked back over at Ichigo he managed a smile and added, "Good night!" He turned, then, and ran around the corner.
"That idiot," Tatsuki grumbled, her hands on her hips.
"I wouldn't worry about him," Mizuiro declared. He turned a smile to Ichigo and the others before saying, "But he had the right idea. I think I'll head home. See you all on Monday."
"Later, Mizuiro," Ichigo called as Mizuiro walked calmly way.
Silence settled over the group for a minute before Tatsuki let her arms fall to her sides and turned to face them properly. She spared a glance at Orihime before locking eyes with Ichigo and saying, "You're walking her home, right?"
"T-Tatsuki!" Orihime cried, her face flushing self-consciously.
"Tch," Ichigo replied easily, "Of course I am."
"Good," Tatsuki said with a nod and a grin. "See you both Monday, then." She turned, took a single step, and then turned back to level a pointed look on Chad and Uryuu. "Come on, you two. Walk me home."
Chad and Uryuu exchanged surprised, wide-eyed, looks before mumbling their consent and bidding good night to their friends.
It wasn't until after the trio was out of sight that Orihime mumbled, "Um, you don't have to walk me back if you don't want to. I'm sure I'll be fine." She couldn't look at him as she spoke; she didn't want him to see that she wanted him to ignore her words. So she kept her eyes on her hands, which were fidgeting restlessly before her.
Ichigo cocked an eyebrow at her words. Like I don't know what she's doing, he thought. Silently, he pulled his hands from his pockets and stepped closer to her. Then he reached out and dropped one hand over hers, squeezing lightly, and said, "I'm sure you would, but I want to, so it doesn't matter." He allowed the grin to show as he added, "Besides, I don't trust you not to eat the rest of my brownies if I leave them at your apartment overnight."
Orihime's mouth fell open as she looked up at him, her embarrassment forgotten, and she exclaimed, "Wah! I would never do that!"
Chuckling faintly, Ichigo pried her hands apart so that he could wrap one in his comfortably as he said, "Maybe not intentionally."
They were walking before either of them realized it, headed in the direction of Orihime's apartment.
Orihime could do nothing but follow a half-step behind him, her eyes glued to their joined hands. He was holding her hand. In public! He probably just doesn't realize he's doing it, she told herself, knowing her cheeks were near crimson. And it was probably true, but she wasn't going to tell him. Her hand was so warm and pleasantly tingly, wrapped as it was in his larger, stronger one.
It was a feeling she hoped she would never forget.
Ichigo was acutely aware of the fact that he was holding her hand as they walked. And he was amazed that she was letting him. It hadn't been something he'd done on purpose – in fact, he hadn't given it a thought at all until it had already happened – but he was most definitely not complaining.
Her hand fit perfectly in his. It was warm, smooth, and soft against his hard and calloused one. He never wanted to be farther away from her than he was in that moment. He never wanted to let her go.
They walked that way until they were suddenly standing in front of Orihime's apartment. And then, reluctantly, they pulled their hands apart.
Orihime dipped her hand into her pocket for her key as she asked, "Do you think…you could stay for a bit? Or do you need to get home?"
Ichigo didn't need to think about his answer. But he paused long enough to make it seem like he did before he said, "I can stay for a while."
The door swung open and Orihime looked back at him, smiling. "Only if you want, of course," she added guiltily.
He frowned at her pointedly and tilted his head toward the apartment. "I wouldn't stay if I didn't want to, Orihime. Now make room for me, will you?" The last was said with a teasing lilt to his voice as the frown softened and he followed her inside.
Orihime laughed at his words and moved obediently further into the apartment.
They easily stepped out of their shoes, and Orihime was hanging her light coat up when she finally realized that Ichigo didn't have one. Eyes wide, she asked, "Oh no! Did you forget your coat at Mr. Urahara's?"
Ichigo watched her as she stepped back from her coat, turning a concerned gaze toward him, and his lips tipped up at the corners as he said, "No, I forgot it at home."
"Why would-?" Orihime began, only to cut herself off when she realized the answer to her question. "Oh. I'm so-!"
Ichigo's index and middle fingers landed on her lips, effectively silencing her apology even as her eyes popped open in surprise. Holding her gaze firmly, he quietly said, "I thought I asked you to stop apologizing?"
He tried to ignore the tingling beneath his fingertips as she slowly nodded her head, causing her lips to drag and push against his fingers. The feeling should have been awkward, but all he could think of was how soft her lips would probably be beneath his.
Swallowing heavily, Ichigo pulled his fingers back when he was satisfied that she understood his point. And before he could do something stupid.
Orihime was feeling strangely giddy – in addition to lightheaded, self-conscious, and breathless – and so as soon as his hand was hanging at his side again, she said, "Sorry!" She burst out laughing nearly before the word was past her lips, and she immediately clamped both hands over her face to try and muffle the sound.
Ichigo's eyebrows shot up his forehead, and he couldn't help but grin. He mock-glared at her, then, and said, "You little sneak." Then he turned, slipping his hands into his pockets, and started for the living room. Over his shoulder, he called, "I think I'm gonna have to keep an eye on you. You're turning in to a real troublemaker."
She was still laughing as she trailed after him, arguing, "I am not! I just couldn't resist!"
"Uh-huh," Ichigo drawled as he spread out in his usual seat. "That's how it starts, you know. First you have a harmless urge you just can't resist, and the next thing you know you're wasting a perfectly good roll of toilet paper on your best friend's car."
Settling in her usual spot at his side, Orihime said, "Well, none of my friends have cars, so there's no need to worry."
Ichigo was chuckling even before she'd finished, and it briefly occurred to him that it was nice to be in such a good mood. It wasn't often he could even honestly say he was in a good mood, but then and there he decided to put in the extra effort to change that. Because, really, he had everything he needed.
Beside him, Orihime's eyes landed again on his plate of brownies, and she pulled her lip between her teeth, obviously contemplating either asking for one or sneaking one.
Well, he admitted silently as he watched her lick her lips, maybe not everything.
"Are you gonna take one or not?" Ichigo asked, his voice low and faintly teasing.
Orihime jerked upright, as she had been slowly leaning forward, and her face flushed brightly as she slammed her hands down to her lap and turned wide, startled, embarrassed eyes in his direction. She began stuttering incoherently when she opened her mouth, trying to find a way to excuse her behavior.
Grin broadening, Ichigo reached out and lifted a brownie from the plate. He held it toward her, slightly invading her personal space, and he tried not to laugh when her stuttering stopped and her eyes focused again on the chocolate. "Go ahead," he assured her.
Orihime reached out and took the brownie from his hand without further instruction, and she only barely managed to stop herself from taking an embarrassingly large bite. But her attention was drawn from the small piece of Ichigo-approved heaven when she noticed that Ichigo had pulled his phone from his pocket. For a brief moment, she was afraid he was going to take a picture of her as she ate the treat.
But, instead, he hit a couple of buttons and then put the device to his ear.
What is he doing? Orihime wondered as she swallowed her bite. She was about to ask when he started speaking. And her eyes widened as he proceeded to order a large pizza.
He pulled the phone from his ear a minute later, slipping it back into his pocket as he said, "Hope you don't mind; I thought we should aim for something more substantial than brownies for dinner."
"I, um," Orihime began, stuttering again. She closed her mouth, swallowed, and finally said, "That's fine. But you didn't have to do that, I would have been happy to make us something!"
"Orihime," Ichigo said, meeting her gaze firmly. "You've done more than enough today. Let me at least thank you with a pizza."
Orihime deflated and she smiled softly. "You don't have to thank me at all," she said. "But…you can if you want to."
Ichigo's expression softened again, and he held her gaze for a long minute in silence. He could never get tired of looking into those expressive, vibrant gray eyes.
When he finally looked away, Orihime did her best to silently drag in a deep breath. Her heart always did funny things, and her brain almost always forgot to communicate with her lungs, when he looked at her like that. But it was always worth it.
As she regained her breath, a wayward thought struck her, and Orihime found herself asking, "Ichigo…will you still be my partner for the project?"
Ichigo re-focused, only then realizing that he'd gotten lost in his head, and turned to look at her again. "Of course," he said. And then he kicked himself internally, and he added, "The truth is…I was planning on asking you, anyway. I just kept forgetting about the damn thing."
Orihime giggled for a moment, her eyes dancing, and she asked, "Really? Well, that works out, then!"
Cocking an eyebrow at her, Ichigo asked, "Who did you think I'd be working with?"
"Eh? Oh, well, I guess I sort of thought you could always decide to ask Tatsuki," Orihime admitted. "Plus, there was no guarantee that someone else hadn't already asked you."
"Tch," Ichigo scoffed, throwing in a half-hearted eye roll before he added, "Most people in class are afraid of me, remember? And besides, Tatsuki and I could never work together for that long. We'd probably end up killing each other."
"You would not!" Orihime insisted immediately.
Ichigo grinned, but instead of commenting on her belief, he turned the conversation back around. "So how many guys did you have to turn down?" He didn't know why he was asking. But he knew that if he was suddenly presented with a list, he would have a hard time not 'accidentally' breaking a few faces.
He might not be good enough for her, but no one at school was good enough, either.
Orihime's expression turned thoughtful, as she clearly hadn't put a lot of thought into the topic, and she tapped her chin for a moment before saying, "Actually, no one asked me at all."
"No one?" Ichigo repeated incredulously. Was he really doing that good a job at chasing them all away? For an instant, a strange surge of pride filled him.
Orihime had already moved on, reaching for the plate with the remaining brownies and saying, "I think I'll wrap these up for you while I'm thinking of it. Want me to grab you a drink while I'm up?"
Ichigo pushed to his feet as she stepped away from the table and said, "I think I'll wait until the pizza gets here."
She paused, half-way to the kitchen, and said, "Oh, you don't have to get up! I'll only be a minute!"
"It's okay," Ichigo assured her. He wasn't yet ready to let her out of his sight.
But the world was against him as, after taking only a single step, his phone began ringing.
Orihime paused again, having accepted his answer and continued toward the kitchen, and looked at him curiously over her shoulder.
Ichigo tugged the phone out, glanced at the display, and sighed. Looking back up at Orihime, he said, "On second thought, I guess I'm taking this. I'll wait out here."
She nodded, smiled, and said, "Okay."
She had barely turned to continue walking when Ichigo put the phone to his ear. "What's up, Yuzu?"
His sister's voice was concerned as she immediately asked, "Ichigo, you've been out all day! Are you okay? Is something wrong?"
Ichigo cringed. He hated worrying his sisters. Keeping his voice calm, and hoping his tone was reassuring, he said, "Sorry, Yuzu. Yeah, everything's fine. I've just been out with my friends."
"You have?" Yuzu asked, sounding almost hopeful. "Oh, that's good. I was starting to worry that maybe something had happened with your friends – you were home a lot more than usual this week."
"Ah, yeah," Ichigo began, stalling awkwardly. His father had been aware of the situation from the beginning, and he suspected Karin knew more than she'd been told, but Yuzu still knew next to nothing about his extra-curricular activities. "It was just an odd week is all."
"If you say so," she replied. Her tone was curious, but not accusatory, when she asked, "Will you be home for dinner? Should I hold it for you?"
"No to both," Ichigo said easily. "Sorry, I meant to call. I'll probably be out late; we've already ordered a pizza."
Disappointment colored her voice, just slightly, this time when she spoke. "Oh, okay. Well, we'll see you when you get home, then, Ichigo."
"Yeah," Ichigo said, feeling slightly guilty, but knowing his sister would forgive him. "See you tonight." He hung up a minute later with a sigh. Ordinarily he wouldn't ignore his family for the entire day, but this wasn't an ordinary day. Then again, what is anymore?
"Is everything alright?" Orihime asked carefully as she approached him. She held a bottle of water loosely in one hand at her side.
Lifting one corner of his lips, Ichigo nodded and said, "Yeah, it was just Yuzu checking up on me. I forgot to call and let her know that I wouldn't be home for dinner."
Orihime smiled again, this time in understanding.
The pair re-settled at Orihime's table, talking easily as they waited for the pizza to arrive. And when it did, Ichigo completely ignored Orihime's attempts to hand him money for 'her half'.
Ichigo was still reluctant to leave, even after the pizza had been eaten and the box disposed of. A part of him was afraid that he would wake up in the morning to discover that this day had been nothing but a dream. So he decided to stay as late as he could get away with without making her uncomfortable.
Orihime was thrilled when she realized that he wasn't ready to go after they'd finished dinner. It was refreshing to see him in such obviously good spirits, and to know she had a hand in coaxing that smile onto his face made her proud. But, as the conversation continued, her long day began catching up with her.
She'd been up and active since roughly four in the morning, and now it was almost nine o'clock at night. That alone would be enough for most people. But, on top of that, she had actively used her powers for hours on end. If she counted from when she had started healing herself, she was approaching twenty-four hours.
Of course, that wasn't quite right. She'd been done healing herself for several minutes before she'd woken up, and she didn't use her powers again until eight in the morning. That was a four hour break. And then she'd finished restoring everyone's memories around three-thirty in the afternoon. However, the extreme extended usage was still enough to be felt.
But I can't fall asleep yet, she told herself, fighting back another yawn. I don't want him to feel like he has to leave…. She smiled at something he'd said, trying to yawn through her nose, and a small voice in the back of her head whispered, Maybe he'll stay….
Ichigo frowned at her third poorly-covered yawn. Of course she's tired, he thought, mentally kicking himself. She's been working hard all day, and she never did tell me when she actually got up this morning. Deciding he'd overstayed his welcome, he said, "Orihime, you should get some sleep. You're exhausted."
"No," Orihime replied stubbornly. "I'm fine, really."
Raising an eyebrow pointedly, Ichigo said, "You're getting cross-eyed."
Orihime blinked rapidly for a moment before her eyes refocused. At length, she asked, "…am I?"
"Yeah," he replied, his lips twitching. It was cute that she wanted to stay up to keep him company, but he couldn't be so selfish. Especially after all she'd already done for him that day.
Ichigo shifted and pushed to his feet, holding a hand out to her as he rose. "Come on," he said patiently.
Orihime pouted dramatically, but she accepted his hand and let him pull her up. "Okay," she said on a sigh, clearly disappointed with herself.
She stumbled when she was standing, and Ichigo reflexively pulled her into him. "You should've kicked me out an hour ago," he said quietly, his hands lingering over her sides.
Orihime made a sound of disagreement that was muffled by his shirt as she snuggled into him. He was warm, and strong, and safe, and he smelled good. And, if she were being honest with herself, she really was tired.
Ichigo felt his face heat up as he realized that Orihime was more asleep than he'd thought. Her hands were curled loosely in his shirt and her head was resting on his shoulder like it was a pillow. And a traitorous part of him (that was rather large, actually) wanted nothing more than to scoop her into his arms, carry her to her futon, and hold her close as she slept. As they slept.
No, he told himself firmly, deliberately shoving the idea from his mind before he could put any real thought into it. Even so, it was ridiculously tempting.
"Orihime?" he whispered, squeezing her sides gently. She only moaned, faintly, and attempted to burrow deeper into his shoulder. He realized, then, that she wasn't actually standing – she was slumped against him, being held aloft only by him.
His heart rate tripled and he had to swallow heavily. He was going to have to carry her after all.
It's okay, he told himself. I can do this. I've carried her before. Hell, I've even carried her to bed before. His self-motivating speech was doing nothing to help him, especially when he unintentionally touched on that still-sensitive memory from the week before.
It was true; he had carried her to bed before. But only once. On the night that he'd thought he'd lost her forever. And if it had been hard to walk away from her then, he knew instinctively that it would be even harder to do so now.
He scooped her carefully into his arms, pausing to let her readjust herself, her head still supported by his shoulder. And, as he started walking, he made a decision.
He may not be good enough for her (the reality was, there was no such thing, anyway), but he was going to try. After having lost her once, he knew he couldn't live the rest of his life without at least trying. Because it was true, what they said. It was better to have loved and lost than to never have loved at all.
So he would fight for her love – for that special place in her heart – and, if he was lucky enough to earn it, he would dedicate his very existence to making sure that she never regretted it.
But that all comes later, he reminded himself. First, she needs sleep. And I can't be the perv who watches her sleep. Which meant he would have to go once she was settled.
With a silent sigh, he knelt carefully on the floor beside her perfectly-made futon and, ever so gently, settled her onto it. He made sure that her head was resting properly on the pillow, and he froze for a beat when her face scrunched up as his hands began pulling away.
She moaned quietly, her face softening as she shifted, settling more into place. She rolled slightly toward him, one hand reaching out, not quite touching his nearest knee.
Ichigo pulled back, far too tempted to lean down and kiss her, and rocked to his feet fluidly. He wouldn't be able to tuck her beneath her comforter, as she was lying on top of it, so he turned and headed for her closet, where he knew she kept a spare.
He found it easily, and then returned to her, kneeling again beside her and gently draping the fabric over her sleeping form. She sighed softly, almost breathlessly, as the comfortable, warming weight settled around her.
Ichigo hesitated, then, even though his task had been accomplished. Her simple beauty in that moment took his breath away, only, unlike before, this time it was a good, warming feeling.
She rolled completely onto her side, facing him, and some of her hair fell into her face.
Without thinking, Ichigo reached out and brushed it back, letting his fingers trail, lightly, across her soft skin.
His skin tingled at the points of contact, but that sensation was almost as quickly forgotten when Orihime smiled and sleepily murmured, "Ichigo…."
He swallowed again and pulled his hand back. He was on the verge of doing something he shouldn't; it was time to go.
Releasing a breath, Ichigo pushed to his feet and took a step backwards quietly. "Good night, Orihime," he murmured, letting his eyes linger over her one more time. And, he noted, it wasn't nearly so bittersweet a moment this time. He would see her again, and she would smile and greet him warmly.
So he could leave. Because it wasn't goodbye.
To Be Continued…
A/N: Yes, that's right, it's not over yet! But it is close…I'm thinking two more? Perhaps three? Anyway, enough of that, I need to know how you feel about this one! So, press that pretty review button and let me know, and then go ahead and continue on to ten! ^_~
