DC: I don't own it

Thank you to my reviewers! So yay nobody was terribly angry with me for making Edward into a first class jerk! I still love him though, not as much as Emmett but ah well. Team Edward! Woot! Anyway moving on. A little bit of OOCness for Carlisle but meh, I can't imagine he'd take Esme being irritable with him very well. He seems like a spoiled husband like that.

Oh, and do you guys think Carlisle would be any good at that Trauma Center game for the wii? My friend and I were talking about how it would be funny if he absolutely sucked at the game and pointed out all the inaccuracies because he's a brilliant surgeon. Whereas Emmett can effortlessly beat the game. Random scenarios are fun.

Chapter 9,

Of three things Carlisle was sure: First, it is possible for a vampiress to cry for a week strait. Second, Esme was in mother hen mode and would only leave Bella alone when asked. Third, one man do wrong all men suffer.

"I think I might kill him myself," Emmett growled to his brother and father. The three Cullen men were sitting on the sofa with their arms folded and sour expressions on their beautiful faces. The Cullen women could be mistaken for a sorority they way they flocked around Bella. Even Roselie, who used to turn away, was caring for her almost sister-in-law as if they had been friends all their lives.

"Nobody deserves to be treated that way! I don't care who it is!" Roselie snapped when Emmett made the casual observation.

"Bella needs our help, just because your emotional maturity can't grasp that doesn't change it!" Alice had snapped at Jasper when he asked why she had spent all of her time in the bedroom with Bella and her female family.

Carlisle had been spared, in Jasper and Emmett's wounded opinion, because Esme had hardly spoken to him.

So now the surly boys were sitting on the sofa watching Chicago with disinterest. Jasper was glaring at his nails, Emmett sat with his arms folded and Carlisle was just scowling.

"Maybe he didn't have it coming!" Emmett complained. "Maybe it was his own business to pop his gum!"

"There is nothing wrong with popping gum," Jasper agreed, "Miss Snippy was way too sensitive!"

"I'm sure one of her friends had just broken up with her boyfriend and that was why she got so angry."

"Carlisle Cullen a little sympathy wouldn't kill you!" Esme snapped from the hallway. Carlisle winced at her tone. He opened his mouth to respond but Jasper and Emmett dove on him.

"No! You'll just make it worse!" Jasper hissed.

"I swear to god Carlisle if you further piss her off I will never speak to you again!" Emmett threatened.

"Okay, Okay! Get off of me please!"

"When you boys are finished wrestling, could one of you go get us more tissues? We're on our last box," Alice said from the stairs.

"You guys still have a box left, isn't that enough?" Emmett asked.

"No, Emmett, it isn't enough! Now GO!"

The three men scrambled to their feet and ran out of the house so fast they put Edward's volvo to shame.

--

Esme sat on the couch with a sigh. Carlisle eyed her warily. "I don't know what to do, Carlisle. Bella can't stop crying and she refuses to hunt. It's only been a week so I'm not terribly worried about that, yet. Her will power still isn't where I'd like it to be yet because she's still so young. Gosh, I just can't believe he left. Men can be so insensitive sometimes," Esme said, "I mean usually you can talk him out of these things."

"Are you saying this is my fault?" Carlisle asked coolly.

"Don't get so defensive I was just making an observation!" Esme defended.

Carlisle heaved himself off of the sofa and paced around for a bit. "Edward isn't right," he said with a sigh, "something in his brain is...off..."

"He seemed fine though," Esme argued.

"Yes, but Edward is also very good at hiding his emotions."

"Did you try to stop him?" Esme asked.

"No," Carlisle admitted calmly. Esme glowered at him "look, Edward has thought about this for a while. He wouldn't hurt Bella unless he absolutely had to!" Carlisle defended quickly.

"You helped him didn't you?" Esme accused with narrowed eyes.

"I may have given him a credit card," Carlisle mumbled, rubbing the back of his neck like he always did when he was nervous.

"Limited at?"

"Erm...that's not what's important."

"You gave him the unlimited gold card didn't you?" Esme guessed coolly, folding her arms and giving Carlisle a look.

"Well it's not like he'll go crazy and buy everything in sight! And it's not like we can't afford it if he does! I've been a top surgeon for about a century now. Don't worry, Esme."

"You know I'll worry," Esme sighed, "you know how I get when he's gone."

Carlisle opened his mouth to say something when Bella walked by silently. "Hey Bella, how are you feeling?" he asked.

"I'm...tired."

"You haven't fed in a while," Carlisle reminded her, "do you want to go get something?"

"No, I'm not thirsty."

"Bella you need to feed or you'll get weak."

"Good," Bella said softly, "I'll get white eyes and then I'll die."

"Edward wouldn't want that," Carlisle said. Esme pushed him with a glare. "What?"

"I don't give a damn what Edward wants!" Bella said angrily, rounding on Carlisle. "He can just disappear forever for all I care!"

Esme put her arm around Bella's shoulders and, as if they had been summoned, Alice and Roselie appeared near her as well. All of them turned angry eyes on Carlisle. Their cold glares shifted to Emmett and Jasper as they came in.

Jasper could feel the tension from his wife, sister and mother, the anger from Bella and the unease from Carlisle. Both he and Emmett turned narrowed eyes to their father.

"What did you do?" Jasper asked icily.

"Nothing!" Carlisle cried. This wasn't supposed to happen. He was the father figure for crying out loud! Someday he would have to subject Edward to this torture.

"Let's go to Seattle for the day, hon."

"We'll get some shop therapy," Alice said with a comforting smile.

"Yeah," Roselie agreed, "we'll get manicures and pamper ourselves."

"I don't really want to go," Bella mumbled.

"You've been moping around for too long!" Alice declared. "We're going to go have some fun!"

"It's useless to fight you isn't it?" Bella asked with a sigh.

"Pretty much," Alice grinned.

So Bella allowed herself to be pushed into the yellow porche and Alice took her place behind the wheel. She pulled out of the garage and within seconds they were on the highway.

--

Edward found himself in Chicago in the dead of night. His nightmare began and ended in the city of his birth. One hundred and eight years ago he was born and the nightmare began. He found himself in the graveyard standing over the small tombstones belonging to his mother and himself.

"Mom..." he began but he didn't finish. His eyes caught another stone. Edward Henry Masen.

Edward felt his breath quicken. His hands balled into fists. His marble fist collided with the stone with as much force as Edward could muster. It turned the stone into dust and made a crack loud enough to raise the dead. He looked up at the sky and was thankful it was clouded over. With tears in his eyes he hit the ground over and over again. When he finished he stood and walked to his own tombstone. He raised one leg and kicked it. All but the base had been reduced to dust. He disappeared in a flash and returned just as quickly. He set a bouquet of roses against Elizabeth Masen's tombstone.

"I love you mom," he whispered. "I'm sorry."

Without another word he left as the rain began to fall.

--

Bella felt tired. The Cullen girls had gone to a night club when they got to Seattle because the mall was closed. They got in with no problem. The bouncers took one look at them and were breathless. Alice and Roselie fit in perfectly among the dancers, while Esme and Bella took a seat off to the side, ordered some drinks, and watched them. Esme danced occasionally and Bella was forced to. Alice refused to let her be a wallflower. She had disappeared into the bathroom around midnight as her being became consumed by a powerful sadness and rage. It took all she had not to put her foot through the wall.

When morning came and the clubs closed, they checked into a hotel for the sole purpose of using the shower. They laid around for the hours before the mall opened. Bella told them that she was having fun but she was sure nobody was convinced. She was such a horrible lair.

Hours later she found herself in a salon with her family. Alice was getting her hair trimmed with Roselie while Esme and Bella got their nails done. Bella was like a zombie. She answered the questions the friendly woman doing her nails asked but Esme could see she was only there in body.

When they were finished, Esme took Bella out into the main mall and waited for her daughters. "Sweetheart, what's wrong?"

"Nothing," Bella answered. "I'm fine."

"You're a horrible liar."

"I know."

"Sweetheart, you can't let this destroy you."

"Who said anything about letting?"

"You know what I mean," Esme said firmly. "Bella, sweetheart, I won't let this take over you. I miss your smile."

Bella smiled. It was fake. Esme pulled her into a gentle hug.

"You've always felt like one of my daughters," Esme said, "it hurts me to see you in pain."

"He was everything and now I have nothing! He doesn't love me enough to stay, or at least promise me that he'll come back! He lied, Esme! He told me we'd be together forever!"

"I know, sweetheart, I know."

Bella held onto Esme tightly and cried into her shoulder. She heard Alice approach first and then Roselie. They all silently decided to go. Still crying, Bella followed.

--

"Hey how was the mall?" Carlisle asked when they got home.

"Lovely," Esme answered.

"Where's Bella?"

"By the river."

"Well at least we know she can't drown."

"Really nice, Carlisle," Esme grumbled.

"What?"

Jasper and Emmett snickered as Esme walked out rolling her eyes.

--

Bella had found the one place in the small town of Forks where she wouldn't be found. Edward's closet. She sat in the massive closet, hugging her knees, and sobbing silently. She wore headphones connected to his iPod. She had been surprised to find that he didn't just have classical and oldies in his collection.

This was like something out of a bad movie, something that wasn't real.

I tried so hard to tell myself you're gone

Bella couldn't stop crying. She wasn't sure why anymore. She wasn't sure of anything anymore. Edward's love for her had been a lie, so what else was?

Where'd you go? I miss you so.

Sometime between her tears the song had changed. The beat thundered in her ears and kept time with the heart she used to have. She clenched her fists. She didn't want to wait until everything unraveled. Her phone buzzed in her pocket. She pulled it out and flipped it open.

Im still okay tell Carlisle

I'm stuck here waiting, no longer debating

Bella flipped the phone shut and stood up.

When you come back I won't be here and you can say where'd you go, I miss you so...

Bella stepped out into the room and listened. Carlisle was out of the house, at work most likely, Esme was in the living room with Roselie and Jasper. Emmett was out hiking with Alice.

Bella walked to the end of the hallway where there was a small window just big enough for her to fit through. She opened it and leapt out, landing lightly in the nearby tree. She jumped down and took off into the forest, not really caring where she was headed. If Edward could run, so could she.

--

Edward had a bad feeling in the pit of his stomach like he usually did when Bella was doing something reckless. He picked up his phone and sent her a simple message of Be Safe.

F You

Real Nice

dont talk 2 me about nice

Youll forgive me someday

maybe

I love u Bella

Edward sighed sadly when she didn't text back. Not that she had a reason to. He had been completely horrible to her and let her down when she needed him. He put the phone back in his pocket and leaned against his knees. He wished that he had a plan.

--

When Bella was discovered missing, the Cullen boys suddenly remembered various engagements.

--

Bella found herself in La Push. She laughed at the irony. It had been her escape the last time Edward had left. She sensed someone behind her. She had a fairly good idea who it was but she didn't speak, she waited for them to reveal themselves.

"So he actually did it huh?"

"No," Bella answered the familiar voice. She hugged her arms lightly. She could feel Jacob Black behind her, the heat from his body radiated against her back. He was a foot or so away from the feel of it.

"Then who?"

"Long story," Bella answered.

"I heard what happened, at your wedding."

"I'm not surprised," Bella sighed.

"Aren't you going to look at me?" Jacob asked with a laugh in his voice. "I wonder if you make a good looking bloodsucker?"

"Keep that up and I won't," Bella replied lightly.

"I'm sorry," Jacob said. "Let me see you."

Bella turned. Jacob was momentarily breathless. Her hair blew in the wind and the sun sparkled on her pale skin. She looked at him with dark eyes and felt instantly nervous and very vulnerable.

"You were cuter when you were human," Jacob said with a sigh.

"Okay and on that note..." Bella said walking towards home. Jacob stopped her with one hand and laughed.

"It's only an opinion, I'm not saying you're not cute now."

"So Charlie told you huh?" Bella asked, walking to the edge of the cliff and sitting.

"No," Jacob said sitting beside her. "He told Billy that you were stood up and that he ran into the leech at the gas station."

"I see," Bella whispered.

"Aren't you going to chastise me for calling your boyfriend a leech?"

"Not this time," Bella sighed, "I don't care right now."

She glanced over and caught sight of the place where she and Edward had sat days before their wedding, and down below where they had made love on the beach.

"What is it?" Jacob asked, following her gaze.

"Nothing."

Bella drew her knees to her chest and sighed into them. She didn't want to cry again. She was tired of crying. Jacob put his arms around her and offered her his shoulder. He petted her hair gently and rested his cheek on her head.

"Do you want to tell me about it?"

"He went to find himself," Bella said quietly, "something happened a few months ago that changed him."

"Like what?" Jacob asked.

"I don't want to talk about it."

"Why?"

"Because it's between Edward, me and his family," Bella said quietly.

"Well Edward is a fool for leaving you," Jacob told her, "he'll realize the mistake he's making."

"I hope so," Bella grumbled. "I've given up so much for him! I mean I wanted to. I wanted to become a vampire to spend forever with him. Everything was perfect until it happened."

"It makes it hard to follow your rants when I don't know what it is," Jacob sighed.

"A demon from his past," Bella said, "a vampire that Edward knew once. He put him through hell for months and I couldn't save him. Anyway everything was wonderful. He was going to change me after our honeymoon. We already had it planned out. We would sit on our bed and he would hold me tight. He said he would bite me on my hand or my neck. I thought it would have been romantic if he bit me on the lips. While kissing me. He laughed and said that wouldn't work, and it would hurt too much. The lip is more sensitive than the neck or hand."

"Why the hand?" Jacob asked.

"James bit me there once and Edward had to suck out the venom. He said it was the most frightening experience ever because he thought he would lose control and drink all of my blood. I remember in the hospital he told me..." Bella laughed at the memory, "...he laughed weakly and said wow I must really love you. Anyway, after he bit me he would stay with me. He would hold me tight while I suffered the intense pain and then when it was over, he was going to show me how to hunt."

"Hunt animals?" Jacob asked.

"Yes."

"So how did it happen?" Jacob asked with mild interest.

"The other vampire...bit me to make Edward suffer. Compared to a human or a werewolf, Edward is very strong. But he is average compared to another vampire. He's more tactful than physical. That's Emmett. Anyway the other vampire completely overpowered him and bit him."

"Wait, one vampire bit another?"

"Yes, and he released venom into Edward's body, which led to paralysis. He made Edward watch as he turned me. He bit me and I remember he smeared some of my blood on Edward's lip before leaving with him. When Carlisle and the rest of my family came it was too late. The venom had spread too far, so all they could do was sit with me and comfort me the best they could. We really came together as a family before growing apart."

"Apart?"

"Carlisle didn't know what to do or where to find Edward, so, frustrated, he fought with Esme more and more. Alice became so fed up with waiting that she and the rest of us left to find him. Emmett hunted nonstop which turned out to be a blessing because...well...I was a newborn and he gathered a lot of blood."

"Animal blood," Jacob clarified.

"Yes, of course. Deer and bear mostly. But being a newborn I didn't have nearly as much control as any of the others. When we found Edward again...I thought everything was going to be fine. We told Charlie...well I did...and Edward was there to comfort me. Charlie basically said he never wanted to see me again."

After Bella finished speaking, they were silent for a long time.

"So," Bella said after a long silence, "hows that imprinting coming along?"

"Ha-ha," Jacob muttered, "I haven't found her yet."

"...how funny would it be if it was a him?"

"Shall I push you off this cliff now or later?" Jacob asked.

"Later I think," Bella said.

"So, do you have any special powers?" Jacob asked, stretching and laying down on the hard ground.

"Kind of. I can feel what Edward feels if it's strong enough."

"How strong?"

"A week or so ago the girls took me out to cheer me up and around midnight I felt so consumed by sadness and anger that I nearly destroyed the bathroom wall. When he was missing, I kept feeling deep sadness and despair. I don't know exactly what happened to him...he wouldn't tell me everything...but I know it caused him great pain," Bella's voice turned softer and sadder. She hugged her knees and rested her chin on them. "That's why I was so confused when he told me he was leaving. When I felt lost and confused I always wanted to stay near the people I loved."

Jacob shrugged. "I dunno, sometimes Billy is the last person I want to be around when I am confused. But then again I find my comfort in my pack. Sam usually knows what to do. Are you sure you can't tell me more about what happened to him?"

"All I can tell you is that psychologically, the vampire that took Edward hurt him severely. When he came back he kept insisting that he didn't deserve to love me or have me."

"Then that's why he left," Jacob said simply. "He'll be gone until he feels that he deserves you. Hell it could take weeks it could take years."

"I'm surprised at you!" Bella said with a grin, "and here I thought you'd be making your move."

"Nah," Jacob said with a shrug, "you're more fun to chase when you aren't so vulnerable. Besides, what would you do if I kissed you right now? Or proclaimed my love."

"I dunno, punch you in the jaw?"

"Exactly," Jacob shrugged, "and I figure now you have enough strength to actually do something besides hop around blaming me for you own masochism, and I happen to like my jaw where it is thank you very much."

Bella laughed at this. He did have a point though. She was strong enough to actually hurt him.

"If you weren't so hurt and vulnerable I would be all over you in an instant, Bella, I promise. So I'll bide my time and wait for that moment where you realize that you are completely over Edward Cullen."

"What makes you so sure I'll come back?" Bella asked.

"Past experience," Jacob reminded her. "I almost had you, and if it hadn't been for that suicidal vampire we'd probably be talking about what movie to rent or something like that."

"You're still as cocky as ever," Bella teased.

"Yeah, and you love it."

Bella sighed and shook her head. She looked at the setting sun and closed her eyes.

"Back when I saw you two last..." Jacob began hesitantly, "...when I saw you last Edward looked at you the same way I did. Like you were the answer to his prayers. I don't want to think that all that could go away in such a short time. How long has it been anyway? Six months? Seven? It doesn't matter. I don't want to think that love like that can fade so quickly."

"What are you saying, Jacob?" Bella asked quietly.

"I'm saying that vampire is in love with you and he's just lost."

"Lost?"

"Yeah, lost, and I'm willing to bet my life on the fact that once he realizes that he'll stay lost without you by his side he'll be back."

Bella took a moment to process what was going on. Was Jacob defending Edward and telling her to keep her faith in him? There had to be a catch somewhere.

"Okay, you must be sick or something."

"What?" Jacob asked, his eyes wide and confused.

"You and Edward promised each other a dirty war for my love. You forcefully kissed me...technically twice...and you both kicked below the belt several times and here you are trying to restore my faith in him?"

"Don't you want to believe that he'll come back?" Jacob asked, slightly confused, "Because if you want to believe that he doesn't love you I'll try to talk you into that."

"No, I don't want that," Bella muttered.

"You silly city girls, you don't know what you want."

Bella sighed and pushed him playfully. It felt good to smile again. It felt even better to feel light and airy instead of heavy and depressed. Jacob could be right, but he could be wrong. Bella knew for sure that she didn't want to put her faith in Edward anymore. She didn't want to cling to his memory. At that moment she wished that he had never entered her life, but felt guilty for wishing such things.

"So can we still be friends? Even though I'm a vampire?" Bella asked.

"I suppose it's a possibility," Jacob grinned. "Hey guess what!"

"What?"

"It's later!"

"What? ACK!" Bella yelped as Jacob gave her one good push and she fell off of the low cliff into the water. He looked down at her as she popped out of the water and laughed.

"WHAT DID YOU DO THAT FOR?!"

"BECAUSE YOU SAID I COULD!"

"I WASN'T SERIOUS!"

Bella leapt out of the water and climbed back up the cliff.

"Aw, you look good wet."

Bella responded by pushing Jacob into the ocean. As he fell he grabbed her wrist and she ended up falling with him. They laughed as they made their way to the beach, throwing seaweed and sand at each other. It was the first time in a long time that the pain Edward left behind faded. She knew that it would come back when she left, but for now, Bella was happy just to laugh again with an old friend.

TBC

As usual I ask that the writer not be harmed lolz. I'm finding myself once again in that area between two events in the plot where I need filler scenes to avoid this being too rushed. Ah well. Whatever. Review and enjoy!