I fidgeted with the collar of my shirt as I climbed out of Annabel's car. I felt like a monkey in my "nice dress slacks and respectable shirt", as my mother had put it. None of us were talking. Mallory and her friend Tiffany stood next to Annabel on the curb, all of us staring up at the big house, alive in the early spring darkness with lights and laughter. We could see people in the inside walking around with cheese and crackers with a glass of red wine. Socializing.
I walked up behind my girlfriend, wrapping both arms around her petite frame, until my arms wrapped comfortingly around her neck and I pressed myself against her, nuzzling into her neck.
"You guys can do this." She said warmly, leaning back into my embrace. I pulled back a bit to see her grip my sisters hand tighter. My stomach was full of butterflies. But not butterflies exactly; more like those devil gigantic bats/dinosaurs that fight Godzilla.
This will be the first time I've seen my dad since our fight. Our fight about him being unfaithful, the divorce. The one that severed our relationship. I got a card with fifty bucks on my birthday and a two hundred dollar check on Christmas. Mallory will go get ice cream with him occasionally, but I usually can't look the scum-bag in the face when I've seen him at gathered family functions.
"The faster we go in, the faster we can come out," Annabel reminded me.
"Let's just get this over with." Mallory fumbled, tugging on Tiffany's hand until the two girl made their way up the spacious walkway up the front steps and into the open door.
"I don't want to see him and pretend to be happy for him." I told Annabel truthfully, the second my younger sister was out of earshot.
"I know babe. But he's trying here. He probably misses you and Mal. He is putting in an effort here. I know you can't be happy for him, but you can be happy that your mom is happy now." She nudged me, reminding me of the fact my mother was dating again. Yuck.
"Let's go. Please do most of the talking. I'll just let him be dazzled by you." I told her, leaning back with a devilish grin to get a good look at her. When I first asked her accompany me to this stupid engagement party, Annabel declined. She insisted it was a family affair. That's why I retaliated, she had to come. Mallory loved her to death, always running to her with problems. Annabel would sit and talk with her whenever she needed, already like a big sister. My mom adored Annabel. At first she was skeptical of our relationship. I can see why, I mean I'm not the most socialized guy. I have a group of small friends and I'm okay with that. They are the pillars I need to stand. After the um... incident, my circle of friends became more restricted. But when I came home with the beautiful, outgoing, model of a blonde Annabel Greene.
Woooooo, was mom impressed.
Annabel's creamy blonde hair was in beachy waves down her back, the front half pulled back behind her tiny head. She wore a pretty and very sexy but respectable purple dress that swung above her knees. Her heels brought her closer to my height. She tugged her black men's but feminine blazer around her as the March air swarmed around us. "Stop." She giggled into a blush and tugged me towards the house.
I gulped as we stepped through the threshold, immediately overwhelmed. Fancy businessmen and their prissy wives were pressed around the dimmly lit house, chatting wildly. Soft jazz music played in the backround. I had a moment of flashback to dancing with Annabel in Ballad, holding her so close I could feel her pulse against me, totally in love. I felt a rushing sense of anger towards my father.
He doesn't deserve to feel love. Not with her.
I scanned the room for Mallory and Tiffany, curious to where they had disappeared to. I gripped Annabel's hand tighter, anxiety flooding me.
"Come on. Let's explore." Annabel murmured encouragingly, as we headed towards the bright kitchen. Adults continued to gather around the watering hole ...aka...bar. I glanced up and caught the sight of my friend Wes Baker, my friend from Myer's school working as the bartender. He was standing next to a blonde girl with an elastic around her wrist, wearing an apron with a tray tucked under her arm. She reminded me of Annabel, her poised and pretty sature.
I made a mental note to go say hi to him if we're here long. Annabel led us into the kitchen where Tiffany and Mallory were leaning against the kitchen island, looking out of place and awkward, a bottle of water in each of their hands.
"Hey girlies." Annabel said happily, relieved to have found them, like myself.
"Have to seen him?" I asked my sister, glancing down at her as she nervously tugged at her yellow dress.
"No." She responded, hardly audible. Annabel spoke to Tiffany in quiet murmurs. I can imagine they both felt a wee bit out of the loop. They didn't know what my dad looked like, what he was like. Only me or Mal could point him out of this crowd. My fingers clenched around hers when I eyed the sign hanging across the cabinets.
"Congratulations Lucas and Cynthia!"
Congratulations, my ass. I'm sure everyone who was sending the happy couple a blender or a toaster wouldn't feel all warm and fuzzy if they knew the whore was a home-wrecker. Ruined a twenty year marriage, broke up a family. Took a father away from two kids.
Before I had the chance to really bulid up steam, a woman walked into the door, carrying two empty champagne flutes. She nodded politely with a smile at a couple standing by the back door, not seeming to have noticed our little posey.
I knew in my gut that was her.
She had dark brown curly hair with fake looking red highlights that reached her shoulders. She was wearing a blue cockail dress and had bangles clanking against her wrists as she set the glasses next to the washing machine, popping an appetizer into her mouth as she opened the fridge. She was pretty, sure. Young. She could only be about thirty one, at the most.
Annabel was definately prettier, and I am not just saying that because I'm biased. Anger curled through my veins as I spotted the diamond ring sparkling on her finger.
"Ow, Owen. Cool it." Annabel said suddenly, tugging at our interlocked hands. I realized horrifcally that my hand must be crushing hers. I immediately pulled away, mortified that I had hurt her.
"I'm sorry babe." I muttered, but she simply smiled at me. Stoic as ever.
"It's okay. Just take a deep breath macho-man. We don't want you transforming into a big green guy whose shirt rips off." She smiled at me, reminding me playfully of my nickname "The Hulk". I grinned down at her before she twined her arm with mine and went up on her tip-toes to whisper in my ear, "Not that I would mind if you were shirtless."
I raised an eyebrow at her devlishly, grinning at her like the Cheshire Cat. She rarely ever gets flirty with me around my sister or in public, and I had to say I was soaking it up. I knew she was trying to get me to relax, but I was putty in her hands. She pressed herself up next to me reassuringly, calming me having her body so close.
The woman at the fridge, Cynthia, turned around and caught sight of us. "Oh hello."
She said, her voice awfully trilly and sounding slightly fake. "Hi." Annabel answered for all four of us, jumping to fill the awkward silence when no one answered her.
"I'm Cynthia." She replied with a smile of pure white and shiny teeth. She came around to our side of the island. She looked me up and down with a quizzical look before adding, "You must be Owen." I gritted my teeth together. Annabel squeezed me arm, which was still looped with hers before I answered.
"Yes, I am."
"Oh!" The woman was clearly flustered. She waved her hand about, smiling wildly. "You are the spitting image of Lucas. It's so great to finally meet you! I've heard so much about you. This must be Mallory." She said, eyeing my sister who looked an awful lot like me and my dad. Mallory simply nodded, clearly uncomfortable.
"Oh this is just fabulous. I've been dying to meet you two. Lucas just gushes about you." Fake. Definately fake. She turned and looked at Annabel with an almost envious glance. "And you are?" She asked, looking at Tiffany also.
"I'm Annabel Greene." She said gracefully holding out her hand to shake with Cynthia. "I'm Owen's girlfriend."
I smiled in spite of myself.
"Oh hi honey." Cynthia responded, her damn bracelets clanking as they shook hands.
"This is my best friend Tiffany." Mallory told her quietly, gesturing to Tiff. Cynthia smiled at her warmly.
"Did you four just get here?" She questioned. Once again, Annabel became spokesperson. All of her modeling must have taught her how to be comfortable being uncomfortable. She barely hesitated in responded, coming to my rescue.
"Just a few minutes ago." She nodded.
"Well, I should go and fetch your father. He'll be so happy you are here." She grinned widely. Before Annabel could open her mouth to give a group answer, the kitchen door swung open and in walked my father. His hair line had reseeded a bit, something I'm sure mom would find great amusement in. He had on a dark grey expensive looking suit, with a navy shirt and black tie. He looked older, tanner, cheaper. More like the filthy piece of shit he is.
"Cynthia, Richmond wants to know if ..." He trailed off when he saw us. "Oh, hey! You're here!" Lucas Armstrong exclaimed, setting down his brandy and coming closer to us. He had his arms gestured open, like he expected a group hug. Niether my sister or I moved an inch.
"Look at you guys. You've gotten so big. Gosh Mal, such a pretty girl, you're getting so big. Stop growing kid! Come give your old man a hug." Mallory cringed internally, something Annabel and I both caught, before she moved forward to wrap her arms around his waist quickly. She pulled back before he could really hug her back. His grin faltered for a moment before he turned towards us.
"Owen." He said, in a business-like tone, sticking out his hand. Annabel loosened her grip in my fingers, untwining us so my right hand was free. I didn't like being separated from her. Our hands met in a firm, solid grip.
I might have accidentally on purpose flexed and squeezed to hard. He pulled back, shaking out his hands before he chuckled and said "My son, you've got a firm grip kid."
Cynthia laughed gently and I just raised an eyebrow, not putting much effort into this conversation as I quickly caught Bel's hand again. His pale blue eyes lit up when he saw Annabel.
"And who is this beautiful young woman?" Annabel plastered on a fake smile, one that would be believable to the common eye but after we've been dating for so long, it all came naturally. That wasn't her real, "I'm truely happy smile". It was the one she put on as a mask, blocking her real emotions.
"This is Annabel. My girlfriend." I told him, resisting the urge to feel smug. She stuck her hand out to shake it with my father.
"Well, it is a pleasure to make your acquantince Annabel." He responded politely, catching my eye and nodding appreciatively.
"The pleasure is all mine." She smiled slightly. Oh, modeling definately pimped her first impression meter. "You have a lovely home."
"Oh well thank you. It's filled to the brim." Cynthia gestured towards the living room. "Would you like a something to eat? Are you kids hungry? There is plenty of food inside the dining room."
"Yes, yes. Come on kids. Join the party." My father exclaimed, ushering us towards the archway leading into the dining room. The long wooden table was covered with food, but I didn't feel one ounce of hunger. We all grabbed a small red plate and grabbed random pieces of weird puffs with creepy looking cocktail sauces.
Yeah, like any of us are eating this shit. Annabel caught my eye and stuck her tongue out playfully. I smiled slightly, shaking my head at her antics. She nudged my sister playfully, shaking out her arms in a symbolic gesture to tell Mallory she was as stiff as a statue.
"So, Owen. How is college life treating you?" My dad asked, popping some kind of funky roll into his mouth.
"It's pretty good." I nodded, not committing to a full response.
"What's your major?" He urged.
"Business." I answered boringly. An awkward silence hung around the six of us as people discussed animatedly around us.
"So." Cynthia broke the ice first, sounding desperate to start up conversation. "Owen, Annabel. How did you guys meet?"
"We went to high school together. We've been dating since then." Annabel answered, smiling up at me and squeezing my hand cutely.
"Oh, that's adorable. Now, do you go to the same university?" Cynthia asked, jumping at the chance to discuss our love life.
"Oh yes. I'm studying vetrinary science."Annabel told her in her golden voice.
"So you would like to be a vetrinarian? That's fabulous. Do you love animals?" Cynthia questioned. No shit, sherlock. Who asked a vet student if they like animals? Annabel just nodded politely, but I could have sworn I saw her roll her eyes when Cynthia and my dad both looked away at a passing friend on their way to the kitchen.
"And how do you like school Annabel?" My dad asked. What's with the intense questioning? I feel like they are going to shove a lamp in my face and accuse me of murder.
"I love it. It's hard and the classes are a challenge but I love college life." She smiled her model smile at them, making both of them lose their train of thought probably at her beauty.
"So Mal, how's school kiddo?" Lucas asked my sister suddenly.
"It's okay. Boring." Mallory shrugged, avoiding their eyes.
"Isn't it your first year of high school?" Cynthia demanded.
"Well yeah." Mallory simply said. Any other chance, Mallory would chat away about how much she loves high school and she would absolutely gush about how "fantabulous" it was. But not here, under uncomfortable circumstances with two people we both pretty much hate.
"Well, do you kids want a tour? I'm sure it could get boring wit a bunch of stuffy adults in here." Cynthia teased, poking my dad in the arm. Ugh.
Insert hatrage vomit here.
They lead us through a family and gigantic living room, with pale yellow walls and high valuted ceilings. All of the chairs had been pushed to one wall where some of my father's colleagues from the publishing company that I reconized sat, discussing football loudly. We all came to a gentle stop in front of a grant mantel with a black stone fireplace.
"It looks much more relaxed and cozy in here without so many people." Cythnia told us, gesturing to her obnoxiously large room that partially belonged to an obnoxiously obnoxious man with an obnoxious personality and a obnoxious ability to lie and cheat. They are both so obnoxiously irratating. It made me tug on my collar again with my free hand.
"Stop, you look like you have a twitch." Annabel murmured playfully with a smile. Mallory, who was standing on her other side and could hear, snorted. On the mantel sat rows and rows of pictures. One of the two of them on a boat, kissing at sunset. Holding hands at a baseball game or cuddly with two sets of young children that I didn't reconize. Cynthia didn't have children so I assumed they were her nieces and nephews or something. There were pictures of their friends and their friends families, all smiling widely at us.
I glanced around the room, irratated at how ridculously happy they were. I counted to ten backwards in my head, like I learned in Anger Management. The more I let this all annoy me, the longer I will not be able to stay here.
"There's none of us." Mallory whispered suddenly, speaking for the first real time without being asked a question.
"Excuse me?" Lucas asked, confused.
"There's pictures. All along this mantel and you have none of your two kids." She said, glaring at him. My eyes scanned the pictures again, for the first time coming to the realization that she was right.
"I have one at work..." My father started to defend himself but Mallory cut him off, having bulit up enough steam.
"You have two kids and you don't have one picture of them in your home." She growled at him, tears watering her eyes. Annabel stroked my arm tighter, both of us growing agitation but she tried to calm me down.
"Mallory," My dad whispered but it was too late. She had slammed her wimpy appetizer plate to the floor and was pushing her way past the crowd. She was out the door before I could blink. A few surrounding people watched the scene with curious eyes. I angled myself to follow her but I knew she would be crying and I really was too wired up to comfort her just yet. Annabel could sense that. She put a hand on my chest to stop me.
"I'll go." She whispered, glancing at my father whose face was defeated. "Don't do something stupid." She growled at me with a tired expression before taking off after my sister. Tiffany just stood there, flabbergasted.
"Tiff, why don't you go after them?" I suggested, trying to control the anger in my voice. "We'll go to the drive-throw for some burgers or ice cream or something before we take you home." She nodded gratefully at me before marching out behind them. I turned to my father, fury coloring my vision red.
"I'm not going to punch, no matter how much I would like to and how much you deserve it." I told him, eyeing him intensely.
"Owen..." He began but like Mallory, I cut him off.
"Don't even start. I don't want to hear whatever shit you will come up with next. I'm sure you'll just make it up as you go along. You'll probably lie. I know you're good at it." I sneered, looking pointedly at Cynthia.
"Hey, you will not come into my house..." Lucas started to warn but I wouldn't hear of it.
"Oh yes of course. Your house." I mumbled sarcastically. "The one you bought after you were done fucking some young chick behind your wives back. That precious house full of guests to cheer on the happy selfish couple who ruined a good amount of lives with their cock-sucking pathetic shit." I growled, too angry to not continue. I wasn't shouting, just speaking in a deep, threatening and serious voice.
"I could give two shits about the fact this is your house. I could give two shits about what you want or feel you deserve in your God damn house. Because you deserve nothing. And I deserve nothing from you. Not your pity invite to a wedding that I don't care about or your stupid champagne or cocktail wraps."
"You should not talk to your father that way." Cynthia interjected, probably offended that I insulted her au devoirs.
"I have a father?" I asked with a gasp, pretending to be shocked. "Really, I didn't know that." My father had not said anything, just staring at me with a mixture of disbelief and anger. I continued in a quiet, condescending voice.
"A father wouldn't desert his family. Wouldn't run off with some whore from work while he had a wife and two kids at home. A father wouldn't leave his son to sit up with his bawling sister, trying to explain where daddy had gone. A father would have been there when his son got arrested or when his son graduated. A father would know how his daughter's first year of high school was, or the fact that his son had a girlfriend for over a year." I reminded him, staring him down as I talked as quietly and reassuring as I could.
"A father would know what his son's major was." I practically whispered at him, standing so close I could count the wrinkles on his cheeks. "A father would have pictures up at his house. But you see, Mallory and I don't have a father. So problem solved." I smirked, resisting the urge to spit in his face, and walked away, dropping my plate next to Mallory's on the floor.
My hands were shaking so bad, I could barely grip the handle to the glass door. Think happy thoughts. Something that gives you a relaxing feeling, I commanded myself as gulit also started to flood me. Just like in Anger Management.
Annabel.
Just think of Annabel. Our first kiss, the "I love you's". Think of listening to music with her in Ballad; studying with her in the campus library, her feet resting on her lap. Laughing with her, Rolly and Clarke at World of Waffles. Owen, think about our road trips, where we pack up a bunch of snacks and fill her car with a fresh tank of gas and just hit the road. We drive and drive endless stretches of busy or deserted roads. We stop at cheap diners or funky stores, just spending the day together.
Think about her hair, flowing out behind her open window as she drove during one of those road trips. Her golden hair, shimmering out behind her as she drove casually, one elbow crooked against the window to support her head while her other wrist was resting over the steering wheel. My head wasn't shaking as much as I imagined her, in her tie-dye shirt and Aviatar sunglasses as she laughed at something you'd said.
Think of how beautiful she is, the shape of her lips against yours.
As I began to think of that important picture of her, that I had snapped moments before our first kiss in the doorway at my house, my body was relaxed enough to straighten up away from the door and head out to Annabel's cheery red car, waiting for me in the street.
I turned back to look at Mallory right away when I got into the car, but she was resting against the cold window, mascara streaking her cheeks. She smiled weakly at me when I reached back and squeezed her knee in a comforting way before glancing at my girlfriend.
She was watching me, with a curious expression as she tried to read me. Her eyes softened as she met mine, smiling at me slightly. But as she cocked her head, I just shook mine. I would tell her everything lately, but I didn't want to upset my sister any longer. Her face was heart-breaking enough.
"Well, that went well huh?" Annabel smirked, shifting into drive.
"Oh, just super." I retorted, rolling my eyes at her.
"I vote we go to McDonalds and get a bunch of burgers and fries and milkshakes and stuff that's really bad for us. Junk food is better at night and in a car. I don't know why, but it's a complicated science." She teased, looking at me hopefully.
"I second that vote Bel." Mallory pipped up from the back seat and I turned back to smile at her reassuringly.
"Off you Micky D's woman!" I commanded in a Robin Hood sort-of accent, pointing my finger down the dark suburban street, all three girls laughing at me in the car. I watched Annabel out of the corner of my eye, her arm curved against the dark window and one wrist resting on the steering wheel, perfectly at ease. I closed my eyes, my head throbbing for a moment.
Just think about Annabel, Owen, I instructed myself. She alway's makes you feel better.
Most of the time, she doesn't even know it.
I'M SORRY IT'S TAKEN SO LONG TO UPDATE. CRAZINESS HAS ENSUED AROUND ME.
SPRING BREAK + MY 16TH BIRTHDAY COMING UP HAS LEAD TO WILD ENERGY.
plus i've had writers block, but that is besides the point
PLEASE REVIEW! And I don't mean like "Oh that's cute. Update" review. Tell me what you really think. The good, the bad, the ugly. (preferrably the good though, cause that's just better ;) tell me the truth, but be nice. kudos to the nice people.
LEAVE SUGGESTIONS OR IDEAS NOT JUST FOR THIS STORY BUT FOR OTHERS! :D
love you tons and toodles until next time
xoxox Morgan 3
