Last time on My Last Goodbye

"T-That's n-not wh-wh-why..." I stammered, afraid to speak to him, afriad to even admit what I was about to admit. If I wanted him to be honest with me. I was going to have to be honest with him. Which meant reliving that horrible night. It was silent before Takashi pulled me away slightly to look in my eyes confusedly.

"Then why?" he whispered, as if he rose his voice any higher I would retreat back into the blankets and wouldn't come out till I forgot about the entire situation. I catiously leaned my head against Takashi's shoulder and closed my eyes. I smelt his minty scent and started to relax.

"...Taka-kun," I murmured and snuggled closer, feeling vunerable, "Do you remember what happened last night?"

He was silent for a moment, "I was in my office working on something, then I came out for dinner and we went to bed," he said sounding a hundred percent clear, "Why?"

"...you were sleepy last night," I stared softly, hoping that he wouldn't hear me, or think he heard me wrong and not comment, "and...well..we..kinda..you know..had sex..."

The silence that followed was deafening to me, I just clenched my hands, teeth and eyes. Hoping that he didn't react badly.

"Did I hurt you?" he whispered softly, and begun to peel the blanket off as if to assess the damage. I shook my head. He looked confused. I already knew that look. He thought I had been a virgin.

"There is a reason for that..." I opened my eyes and looked down blankly at where my hands were under the blankets.

"What do you mean?" he sounded hurt, which made me inhale sharply as I fought back some tears.

"I was raped."

Now

It was silent, his grip tightened slightly and I clamped my eyes shut. "Who?" he murmured and pulled me closer tucking my head under his chin. My mouth opened and closed, I couldn't say it. Though I had been saying the name to him for ever.

"R-R-Rai..." I breathed. Underneath me I felt him tense and his grip tightened again. He was disgusted with me, the person who nearly killed Mitsukuni had touched me. I moved to get out of his grip, but his arms were too tight to unlock his fingers.

"When?"

"After mom died," I whispered again not meeting his look. It was intensely quiet, my body was tense with the uncomfortable situation. I didn't want to continue to talk about it. I wanted to go and douse my sorrows in the shower. "When I was seven-"

"That bastard," Takashi growled and pulled me closer, if that was even possible. We were both silent, not sure of how to go on. My fingers wrapped themselves in the blanket that surrounded me. "Why?"

My eyes shot up to his. Why did he want to know? I was raped. End of story. Rai's dead. He couldn't exactly do anything about it. His eyes were full of rage that made me flinch and look away from him.

"Haruhi-"

"He was drunk and Dad wasn't home," I whispered before looking up at him, "I finished dinner and was doing homework when it happened-"

"Why didn't you tell your father?" Takashi said, the way he said it sounded very accusing. I flinched automatically and attempted to get out of his grip, but it tightened again.

"I-I..." I didn't tell him because I was scared of his reaction. I was a seven year old girl who didn't think her father loved her, and was extremely angry at her father for that reason. I thought if I told my father he would've just said that I deserved it. I wanted to say that to him...but couldn't. My voice barely supported the sentences I had already spoken. Any longer and I was afraid I'd just loose it.

"You were scared," he whispered reaching up and wiping his thumb over my cheek. "A small girl who didn't know what was happening, and didn't know what to do or say," he murmured before leaning down and kissing my forehead, "You probably wouldn't have said anything to me either if it wasn't for the fact that Kyouya had forcefully kissed you-"

"I would've!" I interjected my voice hoarse from crying.

"Shh," he looked at me, "I know you, Haruhi, you wouldn't admit something like this unless forced too-"

"I would've told you, Takashi," I said untangling my hand and placing it on his arm, "I trust you enough."

His lips brush my forehead, temple, cheeks, nose and then found my lips and kissed them softly. I returned the kiss and then relaxed in his grip. He pulled away and brushed my hair out of my eyes. I wrapped my arms around his neck, buried my face into his shoulder, and just cried. He tensed but then relax and adjust us so we were lying on our sides facing each other. His fingers messaged my side and his lips were whispering sweet words of comfort into my ear.

For the first time in ever, I honestly felt like his fiancé. I wanted to fall asleep next to him every night, wanted to cuddle, wanted to cook for him when he got home wanted to talk about things in our past and about things now. I wanted to get married to him. He was the first thing in my life that was solid. Something that I could rely on.

It had taken me long enough to figure it out. Though with him always being so gently acting as if I could break at any moment or that I would run away if he said something harsh. I wouldn't. I hadn't.

I lifted my head from his neck and pressed my lips firmly to his. Surprisingly he kissed me back just as firmly.

"I love you," I murmured against his lips and then sighed. It felt good to say that.

"I love you," he replied with a smile on his lips.


"Haru~hi!" a familiar tone of voices called. I peeled my eyes open, feeling Takashi tense below me. I rubbed my eyes and sat up, we had fallen asleep? I didn't even remember half the things that happened last night. Though I knew I'd remember them some time during the day. When my vision cleared, though still blurry without my glasses, I saw golden eyes staring intently at me. Black hair was covering the head of one and the other had slightly longer ginger hair. My heart stopped in surprise before I scuttled backwards so I could see who it was. immediately I calmed down.

"Jesus," I murmured and tugged the blankets onto my lap and reached over to grab my glasses, "How did you guys get in?"

"Satoshi-kun let us in, Tono is in the kitchen, Hani-senpai is in the living room with Kyouya-senpai," Kaoru said straighting up and brushing some bangs out of his face with a smile, "They told us not to come in-"

"-but we did anyways, it's not like you two are naked," Hikaru teased with a grin before glancing at Takashi who was sitting up, placing his own glasses on his nose. "Besides it's half past noon!"

"Why didn't you wake me earlier?" I said scratching my head, "half the day is gone..."

"We just got here, didn't you hear us get in?" they said raiding the closet and tossing some clothes at us before leaving with promises to be back if we don't get out within twenty minutes.

I stared at the clothes before glancing at the clock. So, it was. I let out a sigh before getting up with the clothes that I deemed to be mine and headed into the bathroom. I closed the door and splashed some water on my face to get rid of the dried salty tears on my cheeks and the slight redness of my eyes. An added extra was that it woke me up. I stripped and took a quick shower before drying off and yanking on the clothes the twins picked out, pulled a comb through my hair, and pinned it away from my eyes. After deeming myself ready I left the bathroom. Takashi tugged on his shirt sluggishly and let out a loud yawn.

"If you're still tired you can go back to sleep, I'll tell them that you were up late last night," I murmured to him bending down and handing him his watch and picked up our cell phones. I shoved mine into my pocket and handed him his. He gave me a look without accepting the phone and I raised my eyebrow. "It's been three months, I think that's why they are here. I can go out now," I said softly, picking his hand up and deposited the phone into it. My hand lingered there a moment before I felt my neck heat up and I pulled away to let him finish getting ready.

When I walked into the living room Kyouya was looking away, Mitsukuni talking animatedly with him. They both turned to look at me and I saw a big black bruise covering Kyouya's eye. I bit back a gasp, knowing exactly who gave it to him. When said person walked in I shot him a look that was part praise and part disapproval. He blinked before ruffling my hair, making it fall out of the pins. I scowled and shoved them back in place before heading into the kitchen where Satoshi and Tamaki were bickering about who got the leftovers.

"Haruhi!" Tamaki said, cutting Satoshi off and walking over. I nearly brushed past him, but couldn't care less at the moment. "Those devil twins woke you up didn't they! I told them not to wake my daughter up! How are you, it's been ages since I've seen you~!" he wrapped his arms around me and squeeze me so tightly I nearly lost my breath, but nonetheless hugged him back. It would be rude if I didn't. When he pulled away I smoothed my shirt out before answering.

"Yes, they woke me up. No, I am not your daughter and will never be, and yes, it has been a long time, Tamaki-senpai," I said with a bow and then smiled. "How is your stomach?" I asked warily. He lifted his shirt and showed me the two centimeter scar. I flinched, "Sorry, seriously."

"It's alright, you weren't you," he said, though I could tell he didn't mean it. "How's your heart?"

I tugged my shirt slightly down and showed him the stitches over the scar. I needed to get them out since they didn't dissolve in water like Tamaki's had done. Tamaki's face flushed bright red and looked away. I shook my head and walked past him, claiming him an idiot, which caused him to fly over to a corner. "Ne, Tamaki-senpai, can you teach me how to play piano?"

It took him less than a second to fly back out and grasped my hands, he was grinning like a fool. "I would love too! To teach a daughter the fine arts is the best thing a father can do!"

"You aren't my father, but thanks," I said with a smile and gently took my hands out of his before walking over to the fridge and opening it. I needed to make lunch for this half wits. Biting back a giggle and reaching in I pulled out some ingredients for Sukiyaki and got everything going. The others moved into the living room and were quietly chatting, though through the paper-thin walls I could hear every word. They were discussing the host club. Then someone asked Kyouya why he had a bruise on his eye.

I could tell he was contemplating it as I checked the sukiyaki. His reply was that he was in a foul mood that morning, wasn't focusing very well, tripped smashing his eye against the edge of his dresser and therefore developed the large bruise. Everyone believed him and I could tell they were checking to see if he was in a foul mood. The food was finished not long after and I placed it on the table as well as eight plates as well as mixed raw egg beside it. Once that was finished, I placed some iced tea and milk on the table and called the boys in.

Being boys they were happy that lunch had been cooked and as we ate they continued their conversation before Hikaru looked up and leaned on his elbow.

"How do you know how to cook this?" he asked taking a sip of the cold tea.

"I used to cook it when we had company," I said meeting his eyes and his face paled slightly before he straightened again and continued to eat. "I know how to make a lot of food, just because I didn't cook much when I lived with Takashi and Satoshi doesn't mean I don't remember how to cook them," I said, with a smile. He looked back up with a curious look then nodded with a grin that matched his brother.

"Mori-senpai said that you didn't like to talk about your past," they said sending a look over at Takashi that was taunting. I laughed and shook my head.

"There are certain things I don't like to talk about. It's not like I'll flip a table if you ask me about it," I said and sent a look at Takashi, "Though I will flip a table if you continue to try to be so protective" I threatened and he just raised his eyebrow half an inch and took a deep drink of his tea. I reached over to grab the milk when Mitsukuni reached out and grabbed my wrist. I tensed up and looked at him, I could tell he was just curious because of the innocent look on his face. I let him drag my hand towards him and he pulled my sleeve up and stared at my wrist.

"Haru-chan...why is there a scar?" he asked looking up at me with concern and confusion.

"Oh, that. It's nothing," I said nonchalantly, slid my wrist from his grip, and took the milk. I poured it in my glass and felt everyone's gaze on me.

"Haru-chan, why did you cut yourself?" Mitsukuni persisted and I stared into his eyes. I knew that he didn't remember any of the last three years and doesn't remember what I was like, but I would've thought he knew me enough to know I would never hurt myself like that.

"It was back when I was seven," I said with a shrug and heard glass shatter. I looked up and saw Takashi shaking his hand and standing up. Frowning I stood up and walked around to see that tea was all over the front of his shirt and there were some glass shards in his hand. I sent him a look before excusing us and dragging him towards the bathroom so he could get changed and to get the glass pieces out. After I carefully made sure each piece was out and his hand washed and cleaned thoroughly I looked up at him. "I didn't cut myself on purpose, and it has nothing to do with that," I said firmly before kissing his forehead and heading back to the table and apologizing for it, saying that the china was very weak and Takashi must've gripped the china too hard. He settled down and apologized as well.

"Why'd you cut yourself?" Mitsukuni repeated, their food finished and cleaned up already.

"It was an accident, I was cutting some food and reached over to grab some tuna but the knife slipped out of my grasp," I said not including the part where I bled out on the kitchen floor in the same spot where my father bled out because of a knife wound. Though I could tell in their eyes that they assumed something like that had happened. "It's no big deal," I said then looked over at Tamaki, "So, when should I come over for those piano lessons?"

"Oh! How about tomorrow after Host Club? I don't have anything scheduled!" he said happily before saying that he'll send a car for me.

I thanked him then looked over at Mitsukuni, "How's your therapy coming along?"

"Kyo-chan taught me how to paint, which is helping me more than my physiotherapy does since painting involves more precise arm movements," he explained with a smile and then looked up at Haruhi, "I want to start to practice Karate with my arm, I'd ask you if you want to practice with me but your heart-"

"I'd love to, Mitsukuni, I need to get my strength back up as well, I don't want to be the weak little princess anymore," I said which was responded by a concerned look from Takashi. "Mitsukuni will be there so I'll be fine."

I went around asking everyone to help me get over the boredom that had threatened to swallow me up. I asked Kaoru if he'd teach me how to sew, I asked Hikaru if he'd teach me how to do computer programming, I would've asked Kyouya about his surveillance abilities but knew that was done using someone else, plus with last night I wasn't about too. Satoshi offered to help Mitsukuni in training us both using Kendo. Since it would be better for strengthening our arms. I thanked him and had four days of a week for a couple of months booked up so I wouldn't be so bored. The other three would be figuring out more about what Takashi was doing behind my back.

Truth be told I was anxious for a month to go past to see if I was pregnant or not.

However, I also wanted to spend more time with Takashi before that month came up. Alone. I hoped that one of us would be so bold as to actually ask the other on an actual date.


Japanese words in Italics

Sukiyaki - Japanese Beef Hot Pot

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