DEAR READERS! I KNOW MOST OF YOU WILL NOT READ THIS BUT IF YOU ARE ONE OF THE SWEET SPECIAL SNOWFLAKES WHO WILL, PLEASE REVIEW MY STORIES. THIS IS AT CHAPTER FUCKING 9 AND STILL HAS ONLY 10 REVIEWS! I REPEAT, IF YOU READ MY STORY, THEN REVIEW IT!


Stan was taking the body of pacifica, and the rotten remains of what used to be Mabel in a black trash bag out to the garbage when the grave digger people arrived, I don't know what the fuck they are called. "Mr. Pines, Mason Pines, Mabel Pines, Wendy Corduroy, and Soos Ramirez?" asked a man with a fuck ugly mustache. "Yup." replied Stan. "And, uh, I just want to remind you, sir, that we were never able to find the bodies, so we are burying empty coffins." the grave man said again. "Yeah, sure, whatever." Stan said carrying the bag of Pacifica and Mabel juice and mush to his trash can. The grave guy was sort of suspicious at Stan's nonchalance about describing his dead friends and family, but decided he wanted to get done quicker so he could go home, and it wasn't his business anyways. "Robbie! Get the shovel and the coffins and get to work in this guy's backyard!" The grave man shouted at his edgy and annoying employee. With an audible "UGHHH!" Robbie lifted the empty coffins onto a roller cart, grabbed a large shovel and moved towards the backyard along with a few other uninterested older guys, who were carrying the tombstones. Stan was waiting in the backyard, and when the guys got there, he told them "I've got free beverages for anyone who wants some!" The older guys waved their thanks, but Robbie just rolled his eyes. Stan knew that weak ass Robbie would tire out in just a few minutes, and the beverages would be his way of catching his prey. Stan went out to upholster Gideon's head to the display plate. He shoved a nail through the back of Gideon's tan-painted neck-hole, and into the case. He washed off the little bit of liquid that leaked, and hung it up in the shack, just in time for the self guided tour. While he waited for Robbie to tire out, he decided he would watch TV. After watching 20 minutes of Alex the Clown, he heard a loud wailing on the back entry. Jesus fuck. I just replaced that door. He thought as he raced to answer it before it broke off the hinges. Sure enough it was Robbie, grumpy and shady as usual.

"Uh, excuse me, I was told I would get free beverages." Robbie said. "Okay, okay, calm down you autist." Stan replied to Robbie's uncalled for snobbiness. They walked into Stan's kitchen while Stan poured Robbie a glass of Pitt Cola. He handed the glass to the angsty teen. "Really? Pitt Cola? Is that all you have old man?" Robbie asked in a snobby matter. "Yeah, what? Do you have a problem with Pitt? I could just have ya' drink nothin'." Stan replied angrily, sipping his glass. Robbie couldn't argue with this. "Where's Wendy? She's the only reason I even agreed to this job." Robbie said. Stan almost spit his drink out, laughing. "Look outside, kiddo." Stan instructed Robbie. He looked outside, and his face went from uninterested and cocky to wide-eyed and confused. On a gravestone was the name "Wendy Corduroy". Robbie took a few steps backward. "Wha.. What? When did-" Stan shut him up. "Yeah. I'm surprised you haven't noticed Dipper's gone, too." Stan said in response to Robbie's sadness and confusion. Robbie then realized that Dipper's presence WAS gone, along with his Sister's. "Wha… What happened to them?" Robbie asked, not even knowing how to feel about Dipper and his sister." Grunkle stan laughed. "I killed them. And I fed Dipper to his sister." Robbie was disgusted and horrified. "What… What the fuck!?" You're insane!" Robbie yelled before darting for the door. "Not so fast!" Stan said, tripping him. "Get off me you freak!" Robbie yelled at the attacking Stan. Robbie then threw a sissy, over dramatic, fingerless glove punch at Stan, who easily deflected it, grabbing Robbie's fist and suckerpunching him. Robbie was now on the ground and against a wall, seeing double, completely disoriented. Stan went away and got his shotgun. Robbie snapped back into reality when he felt something go into his mouth. He let out a terrified whimper when he looked down and saw it was the barrel of Stan's shotgun, pointed upwards, into his brain. "Now listen kid, there are people right outside. If you pretend this never happened, I'll let you off scot free." Stan said, knowing that this would not happen, due to the teen's rebellious nature. Sure enough, Robbie let out a muffled and ineffective "HELP!" before Stan pulled the trigger, ending his life.

Thee entire wall and part of the ceiling behind Robbie was painted red and dripping. Skull fragments and brain matter dotted them, as the ceiling dripped blood onto Stan's messy hair. However, the worst of all was Robbie himself. Not only was the wall covered in his warm blood, but half of his body, too. His head was completely wrecked. The entire top half (Top of the nose and up) Was gone, most likely all on Stan's wall. (It is kind of hard to describe just how insane it was, but if you google "Shotgun Suicide" and look at the first picture in google images, you'll know what I mean.) Stan the fucking madman laughed at his sick handywork,sipping some more cola, which had somehow gotten Robbie's blood into it. It tasted like crap because of this and Stan dumped the rest into the bucket that was Robbie's now empty skull. He then had an idea. He took some spare pennies from the charity donation center at the gift shop (Who is he kidding, none of that shit goes to charity.) and began flicking them from different angles and positions into Robbie's skull. Once he had enough fun, he dumped the contents into the trash and carried Robbie's corpse by his feet, not caring about the cascade of blood that came out of his head like a sink, too his back porch. "Hey, boys! I got another one for you." The gravediggers instantly stopped working and looked at Stan with a sick expression as they gazed upon the topless remains of what used to be their teenage co-worker. One of them began to call 911. "WAIT! DON'T DO THAT!" Stan yelled. "I'll pay you all triple, just don't tell anyone. You can go ahead and just throw this body on top of one of those coffin's before burying it." Stan bargained. The gravediggers had gotten over their initial reaction, and were very happy about the idea of triple pay. They all hated Robbie and his arrogant attitude anyway, so they chucked the body into Mabel's uncovered grave and continued their work.

Eventually, they were done and Stan payed them triple, as promised. As they left, Stan was a bit dissapointed. He could have killed them. He could have killed lots of people. Instead he missed the opportunity. Grunkle Stan had just killed his friends and family. He wanted more. Then he had an idea. He had plenty of electrical experience from rebuilding Ford's portal. He could make a bomb.


Wow wow wow, friends!

It's almost time for the finale. Unfortunately, this story still only has 10 reviews as of writing this. Well, those of you still listening, I was thinking of making a nicer, more fluffy story after this is done. Tell me what you think and always remember to review my stories or I will kill your family like Grunkle Stan.