A/N: So being that I completely changed how this whole 'episode', I have made many changes while still trying to keep to cannon. This is really one of my first HUGE deviations form cannon and I hope you all like it. I must admit I am going through Glee withdrawls and have had to feed my habit by adding three more fanfics to my already long list of ones that I am watching. But I am also trying to keep up on my own. Also, check out my other Fic, No One Can Know. It is Dave's perspective on all the events that are goin on in this fic where he is present, and some are all his own. The chapters aren't as long as these are, and I am more than a few chapters behind on it, but it is a work in progress. I am trying to catch up on it and still keep posting with this one. You don't have to read both, but I thought I would be cool and less confusing to see how Dave is looking at the world without switching perspectives all the time. I know that Dave isn't in every one of these chapters, but that is because this is the focus on Kurt and what he is going through. This story is an eventual Krave story, but it takes time to build the relationship. I have a plan. I have been thinking out every episode in the series and how I am going to translate that to my fic, while also adding in my own 'episodes' and adding my own flare to it.
As always please give me reviews! I love feedback and to know what you think of the story so far.
Chapter 9: Assumptions, Friends, and Truths
So Friday after school I get messages from Rachel, Santana, Noah, and Mercedes about this party that is going on at Rachel's house this weekend. Quinn gets them too, and we have no clue what is going on.
"Do you even want to go? Finn will be there in hopes that you are, Rachel will be mooning over Finn, and I am guessing that everyone will be getting drunk because Puck and Santana know how to get drinks."
"I know that; I don't plan on drinking. The last time I did, I got pregnant, and while I love Beth, it is not something that I plan on going through again till I am much older. I just think that it would be an opportunity for us to let our hair down a little. We don't exactly get invited to many parties anymore, and this way, we can be designated drivers for the rest of them."
"I suppose… But still. It's at Berry's house. How much fun could that be really?"
"No clue. Guess we will have to wait and find out!" She raises her eyebrows and gives me that smirk like she has something planned. I am not sure that I like that look.
So when I get to the party it is already going. Needless to say just about everyone is already drunk. The only sober ones left are Finn and, amazingly enough, Puck. I also notice that Quinn isn't here yet. I wander down the stairs after a drunken Rachel and she skips her way over to Finn and plasters herself Noah against him. I go over and sit on one of the free couches when k wanders over.
"Hello Noah."
"Hey Hummel."
He sits down starts to shake his leg. I raise an eyebrow at him, "So you haven't joined in the festivities yet?"
"Nah, not really feeling it."
"Really, I thought that you would have been all over a party with free alcohol."
"Normally I would be, but…"
"But…what?"
He looks around nervously to see if anyone is listening, but everyone is too busy to notice us. "Okay, look. I am trying to impress someone and getting drunk would only do the opposite of that."
"Ah. Okay." This is actually a different side of Noah. One that I haven't seen before, and I must say, it is quite the improvement.
We go back to sitting in a companionable silence when the doorbell rings. Rachel is still hanging all over Finn and it seems that she didn't hear it go off, so I decide to go answer it for myself. It is probably Q anyway and I have to tell her about Noah's new attitude.
When I answer the door, I find Quinn standing with Landon. I keep the suspicious look off my face and welcome them in Rachel's absence. "Hello! And Landon, Nice of you to join us!"
He just nods his head and barely meets my eyes. But Quinn grabs me in a hug and whispers a 'surprise' in my ear, softly enough that I am the only one that would hear it. I pull back from the hug still keeping my face in a welcoming smile. "Landon, if you would like, everyone is downstairs. There are drinks and snacks there. Quinn and I will be right down, I just need to talk to her for a second."
He nods his head again, and heads for the stairs. Quinn starts to follow him, but I grab her arm and steer her into the Berry's dining room.
"Just what are you up to?"
She looks at me with her most innocent eyes, "I am not up to anything at all. Why would you think I am?"
"Oh I don't know, maybe the fact that you invited Landon. Not that I mind, but why did you invite him?"
"Well he is part of the Glee club now isn't he? And this is a Glee club party, is it not? So he should be here right?"
I raise an eyebrow at her, "Yeah, I suppose, just so long as you don't have any ulterior motives."
"Who me?" she says with a devilish grin, "Never!"
I roll my eyes but give her a small chuckle. Then I remember what I wanted to tell her, "So you will never guess who is downstairs, and not drinking."
"Who?"
"Noah."
"Really?"
"I know I was just as surprised as you are."
"Well this party should be more interesting than I thought I would be."
…
As the party continues, Rachel is still hanging all over Finn and he finally has enough of it and snaps on her. And that is when she starts a game of spin the bottle. Quinn, Noah, Landon, and I are the only ones who do not join in. Kissing my fellow Glee clubbers is not what I consider my idea of fun. Puck has been talking to Q quite a bit throughout the night. But he has also talked with me and surprisingly even Landon.
So during the games of spin the bottle, Landon and I have been making small talk. He has had a few drinks, but not enough to impair his judgment. The talk mostly revolves around how he his first week at school and how things are going for him. He tells me that he has used a few of the places that I told him about, and he found a few of his own. I am glad that he is finding his way but I am sad that he has had to revert to the same tactics that I myself use.
When Rachel gets up to start singing I know that it is time to go. After asking around and seeing that everyone is either staying the night or getting a ride from Finn, I start to head upstairs. Puck and Quinn also choose to leave at this time, not wanting to stay for whatever else Rachel might have planned. As we reach the door Landon comes up behind us.
"Hey, Kurt, could I talk to you for a minute?"
I look back to Quinn and she just nods. "Come on Puckerman. Walk me to my car." She loops arms with him and starts to walk down the driveway, but not before she looks back at me and winks.
I squint my eyes at her and then turn my attention back to Landon. He looks kind of nervous, "What can I do for you?"
"Well I was just wondering… well, if maybe, I could… possibly spend the night at your place?"
I am not sure once to say. For once I am speechless. He sees the look on my face and actually gives me a small smile.
"It's not like that. My mom had to work the late shift and there isn't anyone home. I was planning on staying here, but after…well… that," and he gestures downstairs; I know exactly what he is talking about, "I was just thinking that if you wouldn't mind, I would be able to spend the night at your house."
"Oh." At first I have a sense of relief and then I feel bad. No one should have to sleep in a house all by themselves. I remember what that felt like when my father was in the hospital. So without even thinking about it I tell him yes. We go out to my car, get in, and head to my house.
My curfew was extended tonight for the party, but I am still making it home before my regular time. The lights are all out and my father and Carol are asleep, so I lead Landon to my room. I grab two sets of bed clothes; Landon is about my size. I hand them to him, and then tell him where the bathroom is where he can change. Then I set about making up my sofa bed for him. There is just enough space in my room, which I can pull it out and still be able to walk around. Plus, I am sure that if my father walked in a saw a boy in my room, he is already going to freak out a little.
After I have the sofa bed squared away, I change into my pajamas and start on my nightly skin routine. The last few months I have been cutting back a little bit on it. I realized that using the anti-wrinkle cream and a few other products may be going a tad overboard. So my usual forty-five minute regimen only takes me about fifteen now. Landon walks back into the room, and doesn't even ask where he is sleeping, but just goes over to the sofa bed.
As I finish up and settle myself into bed, "Thanks for letting me crash here. I really appreciate it."
"No problem Landon. I know what it's like to be left alone, and I wouldn't want to do it again. So if you need a place to spend the night or you want to hang out after school just let me know."
He just nods his head and then lays down and pulls the blanket up. So I lean over, turn off the light and go to sleep myself.
In the morning I wake up and start my morning routine Landon is still asleep on the sofa, he is a wild sleeper. The covers are all over and only one of his legs is still covered. I know that I have to talk to my dad about a few things. One of them being Landon's situation and my offer that I made to him last night. It is easy for me to say everything; I just hope that I can follow through.
Then I hear my father calling me from downstairs. I forgot that I was going to give him a few lessons in the kitchen. I am almost done when he walks in.
"I thought today was the day you were going to teach me about brunch?"
"I'll be down in a sec." and that happens to be the moment when Landon shifts and sits up groggily.
"Oh. Uh, I'm sorry. My bad." He slowly backs out of the room and goes back down stairs.
I finish up and take some clothes into my closet to change and when I come back out, the sofa bed is put away, the blankets are neatly folded and Landon is nowhere to be seen. On top of the folded linens there is a note.
Kurt,
Sorry if I got you in trouble with your dad. I will see you at school on Monday.
Landon
I feel bad that he thought he had to leave. I think it is time to talk to my father.
…..
I go downstairs and find him still in the kitchen eating a bowl of cereal. "Morning." I say politely, I still have to judge how he is going to react and I don't want to give anything away. I had told him about Landon when I first met him because I recognized that he needed help. Like I did earlier in the year and there was really no one there for me. But dad doesn't seem so happy.
"You mind telling me what that was all about?"
"What, what was all about?"
"The fact that there was a teenage boy sleeping in your room."
"Well that was Landon. Quinn invited him to the party last night because he just joined Glee this week and she thought that he should be there. Then when we were leaving, he came up to me and asked if he could spend the night-"
"And you said yes without asking me? What so you think that looked like to me?"
"Well it was late, you were asleep. He slept on my sofa bed, and we were both fully clothed the entire time, if that is what you are worried about."
"Actually it is. I am worried that you being inappropriate in my house."
"What if Noah had a sleepover with Finn, would that be inappropriate?"
"That's different."
"Why, because they wouldn't have sex?"
"No, I would never allow Finn to have a girl sleep over in his bed."
"But would I make you uncomfortable if he did?"
"Hey, when have I been uncomfortable with you being gay?"
"So it's not being gay that upsets you. It's just me acting on it."
"I don't know what two guys do when they're together. You know I sat through that whole 'Brokeback Mountain,' and from what I gather, something went down in the tent."
"What do you want from me here, Dad?"
"I want you to apologize for being inappropriate… and promise me that you will never do it again."
"Fine. I'm sorry. I won't have sleepovers with anyone that might be gay without asking you first."
"Thank you."
I start to walk away but I know that I have not even tipped the iceberg of what I want to say. My dad has been nothing but supportive, but there are still times where he can still be a little close-minded. So I turn back to him. "But maybe you could step outside your comfort zone and educate yourself…so if I do have any questions, I could go to my dad like any straight son could. Also, when you want to know why I let Landon stay the night instead of letting him go home to an empty house, let me know."
I walk away, knowing that our conversation is not over, just on hold for now. I need to clear my head, and I think that I need to go for a drive to do just that. I pull out onto the street, and turn on the radio to one of my favorite stations and instantly a song I can relate to come on and I start to sing.
2 AM and she calls me 'cause I'm still awake,
"Can you help me unravel my latest mistake?,
I don't love him. Winter just wasn't my season"
Yeah we walk through the doors, so accusing their eyes
Like they have any right at all to criticize,
Hypocrites. You're all here for the very same reason
'Cause you can't jump the track, we're like cars on a cable
And life's like an hourglass, glued to the table
No one can find the rewind button, girl.
So cradle your head in your hands
And breathe... just breathe,
Oh breathe, just breathe
May he turned 21 on the base at Fort Bliss
"Just a day" he said down to the flask in his fist,
"Ain't been sober, since maybe October of last year."
Here in town you can tell he's been down for a while,
But, my God, it's so beautiful when the boy smiles,
Wanna hold him. Maybe I'll just sing about it.
Cause you can't jump the track, we're like cars on a cable,
And life's like an hourglass, glued to the table.
No one can find the rewind button, boys,
So cradle your head in your hands,
And breathe... just breathe,
Oh breathe, just breathe
There's a light at each end of this tunnel,
You shout 'cause you're just as far in as you'll ever be out
And these mistakes you've made, you'll just make them again
If you'd only try turning around.
2 AM and I'm still awake, writing a song
If I get it all down on paper, it's no longer inside of me,
Threatening the life it belongs to
And I feel like I'm naked in front of the crowd
Cause these words are my diary, screaming out loud
And I know that you'll use them, however you want to
But you can't jump the track, we're like cars on a cable,
And life's like an hourglass, glued to the table
No one can find the rewind button now
Sing it if you understand.
and breathe, just breathe
woah breathe, just breathe,
Oh breathe, just breathe,
Oh breathe, just breathe.
I hear my phone go off a few times but I just ignore it for now, knowing that I need to just get away from the world and be in my own little world.
After driving for about an hour and singing with the radio a few more times, I pull into the long drive of the cemetery where my mother is buried. I don't come here often, usually I just pay the people who take care of the lawn to make sure that my mother always has fresh flowers. It is hard coming back here, but I also feel like she is the only one to truly understands me sometimes. I sit at her gravestone and check the messages I have. One of them is a voice mail from Dad.
"Kurt, I am sorry that I went off on you without letting you give your side of the story. I just don't want you to grow up to fast on me. It seems like only yesterday we were my little boy who was afraid to leave my side. I know that you had to have had a good reason why you let him stay, so when you get this call me and let me know you are alright. Then we can talk about it and I promise to listen without judging you first." There is short pause and I think the message is over but then quietly I hear him say, "I love you son."
Things have been different for us lately. He has Carol to watch him now. I no longer have to be his caretaker. Sometimes I forget that he just wants what is best for me and wants to protect me from the world's evils. I am about to call him when I notice that I have a message from Guest64.
Guest64: So I know it's been a while but how are you doing?
I am happy to have heard from him. He always makes me feel better after I talk with him. Who knows, maybe he can give me some advice.
To Guest64: It has been a while, glad to hear from you. Things are okay.
Guest64: just ok?
To Guest64: well I had a bit of a fight with my dad, and I was upset about it. But I think that after I talk to him again things will be okay. How are you doing? What have you been up to?
Guest64: Sorry to hear that. Hope things turn out ok. As for me… things are good. I am working on coming out to my mom. I hope I can do it soon. There are some other people I want to tell too but I am still too scared of what their reactions might be. But I think my mom knows and she seems pretty cool with it.
To Guest64: well that is good to hear! You will have to let me know when you do decide. I know that it is hard, and you may be nervous, but once you get it off your chest it will be so much better! ^_^
Guest64: Thanks. I hope it turns out good too. But if you are still fighting with your dad, you should go talk to him. He sounds like a reasonable guy from what you have told me. I am sure once he is calmed down, he will listen to you.
To Guest64: thanks 64. You always know exactly what I need to hear. I think I am gonna go talk to him. I will talk to you later okay?
Guest64: sounds good to me. Good luck!
I get back in my car after saying goodbye to my mom and drive home. When I get there my Dad is still sitting in the kitchen. He looks up when he hears the door and when he sees me before I know what is going on, I am engulfed in a big bear hug.
At the same time we both say, "I'm sorry."
Then we laugh and sit down. I start to make some tea for us, it is better than coffee and healthier for dad.
"So you said when I was ready to know why you invited him to spend the night to ask. So here I am asking."
I pour two cups and stir in some sugar for my dad's and sugar and creamer for mine then sit down beside him again. "The only reason I let him stay here is because he said that his mom was working the graveyard shift and he would be home alone. I know what that is like, and that it isn't any fun. So I said he could sleep here anytime he wanted cause no one should have to be alone. I know that I should have run it by you first, you were asleep and nothing happened. I promise."
"I trust you that nothing happened. I am sorry that I jumped to conclusions without asking you first. And yes I agree. He can spend the night anytime. He is only a teenager and he shouldn't be alone. But I would like to talk to his mom too, just to make sure it's okay with her. And when he does spend the night I expect him to either be on the sofa in the living room, or on your sofa bed. No sharing a bed with him."
I roll my eyes at him but then I grab him in a hug again. "Thanks dad, and I love you too."
The song is Breath (2am) by Anna Nalick
