Warning: This fiction will eventually include strong violent scenes and is not for the faint of heart. I will detail further warnings as particular content is released.

I would like to take a moment to credit my beta, RandomPonyWriter for her help and inspiration. I am truly blessed to have such a wonderful person at my side. I know that I could not do this without her :)

Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter or anything that links back to the J.K. Rowling Universe.

"Ronald, you have known that this assignment was due tomorrow for two weeks now!" Hermione squeaked. She looked harried as Tuesday was coming to a close and she was no closer to piecing together all the information Professor Snape had given her at their last meeting. It never ceased to amaze her how Harry and especially Ron could ruin her plans with their consistent procrastination.

"Please, Mione! You've gotta help me!" Ron begged.

"I do not have to do anything, you insufferable blighter!" Hermione shrieked, gathering her things and bolting to her dorm, pleased once again that the boys could not follow her. It almost seemed fated that she would be blessed with friends that were physically barred from these rooms. Of course, once in her room she found the inane twittering from her roommates almost as bothersome as Ron's behavior…almost.

"Gosh, Parvati I don't know!" Lavender lamented dramatically.

"I read it in the tea leaves; Justin is soooo into you. I can feel it!" breathed Parvati.

Hermione bit her lip painfully as she tried not to laugh. She had it on good authority that Justin Finch-Fletchley was not at all interested in Lavender, or any girl for that matter. She had caught him with Seamus Finnigan in flagrante about a month ago while on patrol. She had been embarrassed but glad she was alone as Ron would have caused a scene and spread the news faster than fiendfyre. She had let them off with a warning to find a more secure location in the future, surprising both boys with her leniency.

Now, as she sat there trying to ignore Parvati and Lavender's idle chatter, she thought back to that night. It hadn't been a pleasant sight, but both boys seemed happy and content until they realized she was there. Even as they scrambled to clothe themselves, they gave each other little touches, their lips brushing fleetingly after receiving Hermione's tongue lashing. It had been sweet to see their mutual attraction and it nearly broke Hermione to witness.

Hermione mentally shook herself, tugging the curtains of her four-poster closed, warding and silencing her space. She laid down, curling into a ball as she allowed her emotions to wash over her. It wasn't easy, giving in, but she knew from experience that her feelings had the power to crush her if she didn't let herself experience them once in a while.

Fear

Betrayal

Shame

Rage

Anguish

And she cried. Hermione wept until every last tear had glittered across her nose and into her pillow. She laid there, somewhere between sleep and wakefulness, allowing her weariness to weigh her down. When the emotions were spent, Hermione conjured a handkerchief and wiped her face, sitting up slowly. A quick tempus told her it was 2 a.m. and well past curfew but suddenly, Hermione wanted nothing more than to get back to work.

Releasing the wards and charms on her bed, Hermione crept out the door and toward the toilets, washing her face and relieving herself quickly. She had grabbed her bag, and now found herself in front of the embers in the common room, quietly allowing her mind to untangle all the details, her quill listing questions, problems, hypotheses and possible tests she would need to run in order to give the Order the most clarity. She would use the methods she was taught in her science and math classes, only using information that Professor Snape gave as required.

Hermione smiled to herself when she realized that she had achieved more in three hours than the three days since her last meeting with Professor Snape. It was gratifying that her muggle education could positively impact her work as a witch. The logic and structure behind the Scientific Method gave Hermione enough confidence that she would not repeat herself along the way, preventing waste and possible contamination of the matrix.

Satisfied with her work, Hermione closed up shop for the rest of the night and went back to bed, sleeping as much as the remaining hours would allow.


Hermione received an owl from her parents on Friday, proclaiming their joy that she would be joining them for Christmas this year. As she read the missive that morning, she couldn't help but allow wonder if she had the strength to do what she must and hoped that her plans wouldn't cause more trouble.

Yet a deep sense of foreboding set in when she received another owl at dinner that nearly undid the once bushy-haired prefect. Her father had written her, and by the time she was done reading the note, Hermione was shaking like a leaf. None of her friends seemed to notice however as they were preoccupied with the upcoming Quidditch game; Gryffindor vs. Slytherin.

Their distraction gave Hermione the cover she needed to escape the Great Hall, letter clutched in her hand as she ran towards the library. She was one turn away from her sanctuary when Dolores Umbridge, High Inquisitor and overall pain-in-the-ass, caught her.

"My dear, you know there is no running in the halls," Professor Umbridge simpered. "Do you believe you are above the rules child?"

A lump in her throat and a stitch in her side prevented Hermione from breathing normally, and her desperation for the library's soothing atmosphere all worked against Hermione as she responded, "No Ma'am."

"Well then, why were you running through the halls Miss Granger?" Umbridge asked.

"Uh, I was just going to the library professor," Hermione responded automatically.

Any other professor would have simply docked points and moved on, but Umbridge saw the teacher's pet of Gryffindor as a great prize and wanted nothing more than to bring her down a peg or two.

"Oh I see, and why were you rushing to the library without your school work dear?" Umbridge asked, voice thickly layered with fake sweetness.

"You know, I happen to enjoy the library. I like to read whether it's for school or not," Hermione blurted without consideration.

"Professor," she added hastily as she realized what she had just said.

"You are just like your friend, Potter," Umbridge sneered. "You will serve detention for your lies, starting tonight." She turned toward the nearest staircase, looking over her shoulder as Hermione stood there stupidly. "Come along dear, procrastination will not shorten your time with me tonight."

Hermione began to move, following the vile woman, the letter her father sent stuffed in her pocket, his words continuing to affect her mercilessly. When they reached the DADA classroom, Umbridge walked past and continued to her office. She ushered the seemingly catatonic student into the frilly and disgustingly cheesy atmosphere, pointing to the desk that had a sheaf of parchment and a quill sitting on its surface.

"You will write 'I am banned from the library' until I am satisfied that you have learned to not run in the halls," said Umbridge, sitting behind her desk to oversee the girl's reaction.

Hermione blanched. "Professor, will I be allowed to use the library after I've been punished?" she asked, horrified.

"Oh no Miss Granger, you will write lines to help you remember that you are now forbidden from entering the library for any reason. That should teach you to be truthful. If you need to study, you may ask one of your classmates to check out a book for you." Umbridge smiled, her eyes burning, her pudgy little fingers practically snapping for the girl to fall apart.

Hermione gasped, her eyes widening in shock. Seeing her professor practically chomping at the bit with excitement, Hermione realized that this wasn't punishment, it was how Umbridge enjoyed her entertainment. The pit in her stomach that had started in the Great Hall felt like a leaden weight settling in her bones. Hermione pulled herself up, looking down her nose at the toad-faced woman, her face expressionless. She would not give this woman the satisfaction of seeing her fall apart.

Hermione turned her back on Umbridge and took her seat at the desk of torture, picking up the blood quill and beginning to write the words Umbridge felt would cause her the most pain.

Several hours later found the Gryffindor Prefect shaking from blood loss and wondering how much longer she would be required to participate in this farce of a detention.

"I think you have learned your lesson, dear," Umbridge tittered as she looked at the words that were now forever seared on the younger witch's left hand. "I am on my way to the library to notify Madam Pince of your punishment. I would encourage you to head back to Gryffindor Tower so you do not suffer any further punishment for your actions tonight."

Hermione replaced the quill on the desk and stood up, wobbling slightly. Without a backward glance Hermione walked out of Umbridge's office, forcing herself to climb the stairs.


Hermione woke with a splitting headache in an alcove on the fifth floor, barely recalling how she had scrambled into the space that would keep her concealed while she tried to catch her breath. She didn't remember falling asleep but she wasn't surprised. She knew there was no way she could get back to Gryffindor Tower on her own steam, and instead she looked around to see where exactly she was.

Hermione crawled to an unused office and warded the door from intrusion, allowing the floor to pillow her body as she set her wand to spark in a few hours, still well before dawn.


The next morning dawned bright and cheery, and Hermione wanted nothing more than to sleep through it. She could not help the invectives that flew out of her mouth as she got dressed for the day, near tears as she considered that she was no longer safe at Hogwarts. The desperation was overwhelming and threatened to destroy the fledgling adult. Yet by the time she made it to the common room, any emotion she felt was hidden away, locked behind the walls of her Occlumency shields.

Hermione walked down with Harry and Ron to breakfast, keeping her left hand hidden amidst her school robes. She didn't want them to be distracted with her problems as they tried to mentally prepare for the upcoming match.

Part way through breakfast she felt eyes on her and looked up, surprised to see Professor Snape scrutinizing her. He scowled at her when their eyes met and looked toward his own house table to break contact. Hermione shook her head in wonder, confused by his actions. They had agreed to meet after the game to go over her work. Perhaps he's reconsidering our arrangement, Hermione thought.

She continued to eat, hoping food would restore the strength and vitality that Umbridge had stolen the night before. Hermione was able to make it back to her room after a couple hours sleep, but she still felt the lassitude in her body. It was unnerving to think that Umbridge was getting away with this. Hermione knew for a fact that other students were forced to use the blood quill, and it sickened her to think of the woman's maniacal sadism.

She let her eyes wander over the other professors, bile rising in her throat when she looked at the pleased expression on Umbridge's face. Hermione couldn't help but wonder what it would feel like to exact revenge, images of the toad's blood dripping from cursed wounds temporarily allaying her wretched mood.

Other thoughts rose unbidden, revulsion boiling deep inside as she felt the ghost of hands that she tried to forget during her waking hours. Adrenaline flooded her system as she fought the memories from taking hold, burying her face in her hands as she tried to push the images of a face shrouded in darkness back into her siege tower.

She felt lightheaded as the memories receded, her breathing shallow and shaky as the adrenaline faded. Hermione risked a look at her friends; good, they didn't see anything she thought.

"Miss Granger, come with me," Professor Snape's voice demanded from behind Hermione. She whirled around and saw his forbidding presence looming next to her and nodded, getting up from her chair and following the man down to his office. He ushered her in silently, closing the door softly, warding his rooms as if they were about to speak of Order business.

"Sir, is something wrong?" Hermione asked cautiously, out of her depth after what she had just gone through.

"Drink this," he ordered, handing her a phial.

"What is it?" she asked suspiciously, her hands shaking slightly as she reached for it, her eyes riveted on the dark bottle.

"Blood-replenishing potion," Severus intoned smoothly. Hermione's eyes snapped up to her potions master's and he nodded to her silent question. "Yes, Dolores was most pleased to have gotten you under thumb last night. She didn't tell anyone what your punishment was, but if it is like anything she's doled out in the past…"

"The professors know what she's doing?" Hermione asked, appalled that nothing had been done to stop the practice.

"Yes, and before you blast me with your indignant rage, remember that we are trying to protect the students as best we can. To defy the High Inquisitor is career suicide," Severus growled.

Hermione lowered her head in defeated understanding, the helplessness she felt earlier returning ten-fold. She tipped the phial of blood-replenishing potion back and swallowed the vile substance, immediately feeling its effects, relishing in the warmth that stole over her body for a few moments.

"Thank you, sir," she whispered as her body regained its equilibrium. She chanced a look at Professor Snape, watching as his eyes went from calculating to distant.

"Miss Granger, what did she force you to write?" he asked delicately. Hermione clutched her left hand into a fist, relishing the pain the tender flesh caused as it pulled over the delicate bones. She took a deep breath, forcing herself to straighten her spine as she allowed her professor to see the mutilation her right hand caused.

I am banned from the library

Severus closed his eyes and his nostrils flared in loathing. She was deliberately tampering with the education of the students, and there was nothing he could do! Educational Decree Number 25 had been released that morning, preventing any other teacher aside from the High Inquisitor from changing or removing punishments incurred by the students. He could be of no more help to her than her friends now.

"What was the cause of this punishment," Severus nearly spat in disgust.

"She said I am just like Harry. She said that denying my access to the library was for lying to her," Hermione's voice sounded deadened to her ears and she was once more overwhelmed with desolation. "The blood quill was for running in the halls," she added, her throat thick with tears. She turned from Professor Snape, hugging her arms around herself as she tried to keep her emotions controlled. It wouldn't do to prove she wasn't mature enough and cry at such frivolous issues.

"All I wanted was to escape," she continued to whisper, her back to her professor. "But now I can't even do that."

"What were you attempting to escape?" Severus asked quietly, sensing the great emotions Hermione was battling.

"Nothing, it's stupid," Hermione muttered, turning back to face the dour potions master, wiping her face of the few tears she couldn't prevent from falling. She turned cold eyes on Severus, and it was all he could do to keep eye contact. She reminded him so much of himself; the realization chilled him to the bone. It was at that moment he recalled the images he saw in her mind when she was staring at the head table during breakfast. Making up his mind, he grabbed the nearest chair, the one he had transfigured the week before and settled into it.

"Miss Granger, do you trust me?"

She looked down at him, startled by his question. "Yes, but what-"

"If you trust me, then you need to know that I won't judge you. I want to help you, but you need to tell me what you need to escape from," Severus murmored. He didn't want to divulge that he had seen a man raping her, that she had allowed the image to escape before her defenses were back up. He wasn't even looking, but then it was there, almost screaming for an outlet, and he couldn't stop his mind from witnessing the cloudy memory.

Hermione narrowed her eyes, suspicion cooling her chocolate brown orbs even further. "I don't need your help Professor Snape," she intoned darkly, whirling around and breaking his wards with ease.

And then she was gone.


A/N: This was the most difficult chapter for me to write so far, and I hope those who read to this point will drop a review as we are beginning to get into the crux of the story. I would greatly appreciate your feedback, and I hope you continue to enjoy this story as we proceed into dangerous territory.

Love and Review!