CyberBullying.
Claire POV
Chapter nine- I just wanted to die.
I woke up to the faint sound of talking. I couldnt focus properally and my eyes wouldnt open. I felt extreamly tired and for a minute I felt happy. Thats until the memories of the last few days came crashing back to me. Monica. Facebook. Video. Pills. Suicide. Wait, didnt I try to kill myself? Did I not suceed? Im not dead now, so what happened?
Oh yeah, now its coming back to me. Shane. He saw me, he tried taking them of me but they flew everywhere. They were all over the floor and Michael was craddling me while I screamed and cried. Why didnt I just get the stupid cap of quicker? But I had already took some, did that not do the trick? Obviously not.
I hadnt noticed that my eyes had opened while I was lost in my thought. Three pairs of eyes were pearing over me. I focused my eyes and found one with long black hair, one with gorgeous blond hair and another with shaggy brown hair. Eve, Michael and Shane.
Once I had my vision back to normal I tried to sit up but a huge pain trailed through my whole body. I screamed in pain and a pair of hands were on my shoulders lowing me down gently.
I looked at who it was and stood over me was Michael. Looking me in the eyes. Shane was stood with Eve at the end of my bed. I looked around and noticed I was in hospital, wires were coming out of me left right and center and I couldnt breathe.
'Claire, calm down' Michaels soothing voice says. I get my breathing back to normal and rest my head to the pillow behind me. Eve and Shane wearily sit next to my bed and I just look up at the ceiling, gutted that I hadnt been taken away.
'Claire, Im so sorry' Shane says, I look over to him and his face is filled with tear tracks. I look back up at the ceiling, ignoring his comment. If it wasnt for him stopping me I would have gotten what I wanted, I would be in no more pain and Monica would have gotten her own way.
'I just wanted to die, why couldnt you let me do it' I say as tears blured my vision. I blinked hard which made tons more tears fly out of my eyes.
'CB, how could we not stop you? You were going to kill yourself, you were going to take them pills and if you had, you wouldnt be here right now' Eve says edging closer to my bed.
'Have you not realised that thats what I want. To not be here. Everybody hates me and now I hate myself, I dont want to do this anymore. I cant cope' I shake my head, still looking up at the ceiling not wanting to meet anybodys eyes.
'Claire, sweetie we love you, I wouldnt know what we would do if you had died tonight. I know its hard but we can get through this' Michael says kissing my forehead. I finally give in and nodd. I hear Shane let out a sigh and I finally look at him.
'Shane...' I say before he cuts me off.
'No Claire, stop. It was completely my fault. If I would have believed you and not that stupid cow this wouldnt have happened, I would have been there for you and you wouldnt have gone all suicidal and almost killed yourself.' Shanes says through his sobs. I grabbed his hand which looked like it surprised him and let out a sigh.
'Shane, its not your fault. This isnt anybodies fault apart from Monica and the rest of her gang. Shes going to keep doing this, if I like it or not. I wont be able to cope. I cant cope. I dont know how I did for the past few days. I couldnt take it anymore, I had to do something. I didnt want to live like this anymore. Being a bitch, being a whore, being a slaggy cow. I didnt want to be that Shane, please believe me' I break down in tears and Shane rushes straight to me.
'Claire, we are going to get you through this, with whatever it takes. I love you, so much and I cant see you like this anymore, I promise you that when you get out of here I am going to do whatever it takes to make you better, Claire, I promise' Tears erupt from Shane as he puts his forehead on the top of my head. He kisses me lightly and stays looking into my eyes for a few minutes.
I knew my friends would help me, I still, however wish I was dead. I was better of that way. No one wanted me in this world apart from my three bestfriends. But thats it. I couldnt cope anymore, I wanted to go. When I get the chance, thats it. I need to get out of this world. I cant cope with the bullying much longer. Its slowly killing me itself.
