Never be alone again - Shelby finds out she'll never have to go through anything alone again. Originally a oneshot inspired by THAT kiss!

Rating - T

Characters - Shelby, Puck, Beth, Mrs Puckerman (Sarah), Noah's sister (Hannah) & Bruno the dog.

A/N -I want to address a review left by ABC, I would have preferred to do this by private message but s/he went anonymous. In the Rachel/Lyla fic the medical element was that Lyla was born early, I'm sure that many people would have been annoyed if Lyla had gone from being sick to being well seemingly overnight. And in this fic the last chapter was the first chapter that has had any real medical elements in it. I know Beth was sick in a previous chapter but that happens, kids get sick. I had Shelby/Noah see the doctor because I didn't necessarily want to go down the route I have read before where Shelby miraculously gets pregnant and everything is fine because she's said in the show she can't have children, so there must be a (medically related) reason for this. If you want to discuss this further then feel free to pm me, but if how/what I write really bothers you that much I'm sure there are hundreds if not thousands of fics on here that don't have any medical elements at all for you to enjoy.

Ideas are VERY welcome.

Reviews/concrit are loved.


"She's..." Sarah was just as shocked as Noah had been when Shelby told him the news. Noah nodded and moved to sit on the sofa, burying his head in his hands, "Oh Noah" Sarah sighed and moved to sit beside her son, "talk to me Nono".

"They said they don't know what's going to happen, the doctor said everything looks okay now but they don't know what's going to happen further along, they said she might lose the baby and if she doesn't it will probably be born early. Shelby asked what would happen if she didn't want to have the baby. It was the only thing she said Mom, the only thing she wanted to know was if she could get rid of it."

"Oh baby" Sarah felt her heart for Noah and for Shelby, "this must have been a big shock for you both."

Noah nodded and explained Shelby's medical history, "she didn't think she'd ever be able to have another baby, she thought we'd have to adopt to have another child and now we've got the chance to have a baby of our own and she wants to get rid of it."

"I don't think she necessarily wants to get rid of it Noah, I think she just wants to be able to consider all her options."

"I want this baby so much Mom" he sighed, "but I'm scared" he admitted something he didn't like to admit.

"What of?"

"What if something happens to Shelby, what if she keeps the baby because she thinks it's what I want and something happens and I lose them both, I couldn't cope with that Mom, I can't, I can't..."

"Did the doctor say that keeping the baby would put Shelby at risk?" Noah shook his head, "No' I'm sure that if having this baby would put Shelby in any danger you would have been told that, that's not something they would keep from you."

"I want her to keep it Mom but I don't want her to feel like she has to keep it because that's what I want. I won't, I don't know what to do Mom, I know I need to go home and talk about this with her but what do I say, what do I do?"

Tears were rolling freely down Noah's face by now and Sarah pulled her son into a hug, "I can't answer that for you Noah. I think that the two of you should take some time out, I assume the doctor gave you some things to look over?" Noah nodded, "okay so the two of you need to take some time out, read everything the doctor gave you, give it some time to sink in and then talk it over, if you make the wrong decision now you'll never forgive yourself. Don't rush the decision Noah. Do you know how far along she is?"

He nodded, "the doctor said about 7 weeks."

"Okay, so you have plenty of time to make a decision, whatever that decision is make sure it's one you don't rush and please don't just go with whatever Shelby wants, you need to tell her how you feel and what you want. This is your baby too Noah, don't think telling her what you want isn't allowed"

Noah nodded, "I won't, I mean I'll tell her what I want."

"Do you want me to have Beth tonight?"

Noah shook his head, "I suggested it earlier but Shelby wants Beth home."

"Okay. I think you need to go to the bathroom and clean your face before Beth comes down, I take it you're not telling her right now?"

"We're not telling anyone Mom, I mean she said I could tell you and I said she could tell Rachel but we're not telling anyone else, don't tell anyone please, not even Hannah."

"It's not my news to tell Noah, who you tell and when you tell them is up to you and Shelby."

Noah leant over and kissed Sarah's cheek, something he'd not done since he was a lot younger, "thanks Ma."

"It's okay Noah" she smiled at him, "you and Shelby are strong together, you'll get through this."

"I hope so, I really do."

Noah got home almost an hour after he dropped Shelby off to find the house seemingly empty, "where's Momma?" Beth asked as she dropped to her knees to play with Bruno, "I thought you said she was home."

"She is, I mean she was, you stay with Bruno and I'll go see if she's upstairs."

"Can we go play fetch in the garden?"

Noah nodded and walked through the house to unlock the kitchen door, "you stay in the garden okay, you don't go anywhere else without telling me first."

Beth nodded and took Bruno's favourite ball from the box of dog toys in the kitchen, "I promise Daddy" she grinned before skipping out of the house.

"Shelby." Noah found her curled into a ball on the bed sobbing, her pillow wet with tears and the information sheets the doctor gave her scattered on the bed. "Oh Shelby" he climbed onto the bed behind her and wrapped his arms around her waist, "it'll be okay" he told her, "we'll be okay."

"Don't" she whispered, "don't promise me that when you don't know it's true."

Noah sighed, "I know that I love you and that you're stronger than you sometimes think you are. Whatever happens, it might take a while but we'll be okay in the end Shelby." She sighed and he knew she didn't believe him, "Beth's playing with Bruno outside, I think she'd like to see you."

"Does she, does she know anything's wrong?"

"No, she asked where you were and I told her to play with Bruno while I came to find you. You need to get yourself together" he told her, "wash your face and come and join us downstairs, I'll tell Beth you were taking a nap, we can talk, cry, cuddle, whatever when she's in bed" he kissed her cheek, "I love you Shel."

Shelby nodded and sighed again as Noah stood from the bed, "I love you too Noah."

"Did you find her Daddy?" Beth asked as she rolled on the grass with Bruno, playfully trying to get him to part with his favourite chew toy.

"I did" he smiled crouching down to ruffle the fur between Bruno's ears, "she was upstairs having a nap, she'll be down soon." He stood back up, "I'm going to make a start on dinner, do you want to help me or are you going to stay here with Bruno?"

"I want to help you Daddy" Beth grinned, "can we have chicken?"

"I thought we could make a pie" Noah told her, "but we could make a chicken pie if you want."

"Can we put vegibles in the pie?"

Noah chuckled Beth was a strange child, unlike the other kids in her class she loved vegetables, "let's go and see what vegetables we've got in the fridge then" he picked up his daughter and span her round in the air before sitting her on his side, "come on stinky."

Noah measured out the ingredients for the pastry and allowed Beth to mix it and roll it out as he peeled and cut the vegetables and prepared the chicken, "all done daddy" Beth smilled up at him.

Noah smiled and blinked back tears, he knew that Beth would make a brilliant big sister, he hoped that one day she'd get the younger sibling he knew she'd adore. "Okay" he forced a smile, "let's get that pastry into the dish and fill it with chicken and vegetables and gravy."

"Hey" Shelby smiled slightly as she walked into the kitchen, "what are you up to?"

"We're making a pie Mommy" Beth smiled, "come help us."

Shelby walked over to the counter Beth was sat on, "did you help with the pastry Bee?"

Beth nodded proudly, "I did it all myself Momma, Daddy put all the 'greedients in the bowl and I mixed it and I rolled it out real nice Momma."

"You're covered in flour" Shelby told Beth, you've even got it in your hair.

"I'm okay Momma" Beth smiled at Shelby, "I can have a bath 'fore I go to bed."

Beth's mindless chatter broke the silence over the dinner table and it was only after Shelby and Noah were sure she was fast asleep that they allowed themselves to talk about the subject they'd been avoiding all evening, "you, you want me to keep it don't you?" Shelby asked Noah.

"Not if it's not what you want to do" Noah nodded, "but I think we've been given this chance, it seems silly to throw away something we both know we want."

Shelby knew he was right, they both wanted this child, "I know, but it's not as simple as that is it Noah? If it was the case that I was pregnant now and in a few months time we were going to have a perfect, healthy little baby, you know I'd be so excited about this but that's not going to happen." Shelby sighed and wiped away the tears that had slipped from her eyes, "there's so much that could go wrong, even if I don't miscarry Noah, there's still the chance that the baby could be premature, they could have a number of disabilities, I might not get to be Mommy anymore Noah, I might have no choice but to become the nurse to our child, that wouldn't be fair on Beth for a start. I don't want her to hate me because I have to give the baby more attention than I can give her. I don't think that's something I'd be able to do Noah. It sounds awful but you'd get to leave the house every day while I stayed home. I don't know if I'd be able to live with myself if our child had no quality of life all because we were selfish."

Noah sighed, he could see where Shelby was coming from, "that might not happen though Shel, there could be a baby in there that's going to grow up to do all sorts of amazing things and we'll never know about it if we don't give it a chance."

"It's a lot to risk though Noah, now we know that I have some eggs that are capable of making babies and we've never doubted your fertility, we could get someone else to have our baby, someone who doesn't have the problems I have."

Noah ran his hands through his hair, "My ma used to watch the health channel all the time, we could get a surrogate to have a baby for us and she could have an accident or get sick and we could still have all the problems you're worried about." He sighed again, "At the end of the day Shel it's your body, I won't force you into anything you don't want to do and I won't leave because of the decision we make but I don't want to spend the rest of my life thinking 'what if'. If we have a child that needs a little or a lot of extra care you won't have to do that on your own Shelby, I'll be here, I'll be here if you want me to look after the child while you work, I'll be here if you want us both to work and pay for a nurse. I mean we could even both work part time, we'd work something out, but we could be worrying about nothing, our biggest worry might be how to stop Beth putting the baby in her doll's buggy or how to stop the baby eating Bruno's dog food. No one knows what's going to happen, I get that that scares you, it scares me too, and you're right something bad might happen but there's an equal chance that something amazing might happen."

"I can deal with something amazing Noah, I can cope with a healthy baby, it's the bad things I don't know if I could deal with. I think I just need time Noah, I need to read all the things we got from the doctor and I need to think about things, I, I don't have anyone else but you to talk this through with."

"You can talk to my Ma."

"I don't, I mean, don't you think she'd mind?"

Noah shook his head, "of course not. She's my mum but she's your friend too Shelby. She's working a late shift tomorrow so she won't be leaving til about three. Call her in the morning and go over, she won't mind Shelby, she won't mind at all."

Noah was right, Sarah didn't mind Shelby going round at all, "you look like you didn't sleep well" Sarah said as Shelby walked through the door.

Shelby shook her head, "I don't think Noah did either, we've got a lot to think about."

"I know" Sarah sighed as she gestured for Shelby to sit on the sofa, "I wish I could do something to take this away from you both" she sighed again, "can I get you a drink?"

Shelby nodded slightly, "water's fine."

Sarah walked into the kitchen, returning a few minutes later with two glasses of water which she placed on the coffee table before sitting beside Shelby, she studied the woman for a minute before smiling sadly and taking Shelby's hand in her own, "it's a tough decision hey?"

Shelby nodded and her eyes filled with tears, "I want it, I want it so much but I don't think I can Sarah."

"Why not? You're a strong woman Shelby, you're a strong woman and a brilliant mother. Noah loves you and he'll support you whatever happens I'll make sure of that. You have Rachel, Hannah, I'm not going anywhere. We all love you and we'll all support you baby or no baby."

"I'm scared" Shelby admitted, "I don't know what I'd do if I lost the baby, I know it already means so much to Noah, I just think that if I did it this way, as awful as it sounds, it's my choice and I think that for me at least that would be easier to deal with than it just happening. I don't want to hurt him Sarah. I wish I could do this for him but I don't think I can."

"I know you don't want to hurt him, and I wish I could tell you what to do or make the decision easier but I can't, I'll just tell you what I told Noah, that this is something the two of you need to talk about, you both need to take some time to work out how you feel and what you want and then you need to sit down and tell each other what you want."

"The doctor said it was unlikely that I'd be able to carry a baby to term. I read the leaflet he gave us about preemies, about the problems they can have. I need to think about Beth too. I don't want her to feel pushed out if Noah and I have a baby that has special needs. But Noah thinks I'm focusing too much on the bad things, and that I need to remember things could be fine."

"Not all preemies have special needs Shelby. There's something I've not even told Noah because I know he'd just worry, but it took the doctors almost 9 minutes to get Hannah breathing when she was born. She wasn't a preemie but they told me her brain had been starved of oxygen and there was no telling what damage was done, they told me she might never walk or talk, that she might not have any quality of life. One doctor even told me that no one would judge me if I put her in care. I'll tell you what damage was done Shelby, Hannah only has 85% hearing in her left ear. That's the only thing that's ever been wrong with her and for all we know she could have had that even if she'd taken her first breath straight away. They have to prepare you for the worst, it's better for them to tell you the worst thing is going to happen and then find out that your baby is absolutely fine than for them to tell you your baby will be fine and then you find out that there's something seriously wrong. I understand that you're worried about all the things that might go wrong and that's okay, but like Noah said there's a chance that everything will be fine."

"I know" Shelby sighed, "there's just so many 'what ifs' to think about. I know that if I didn't have all the problems I do have I wouldn't think twice about keeping the baby. I hate knowing that it's my body that might put my child at risk."

"This isn't your fault Shelby, whatever happens you can't blame yourself."

"It's not that easy though is it Sarah?"

Noah and Shelby talked about almost nothing but their unborn child for the next three weeks before they finally came to a decision. "We should call the doctor" Noah suggested once they were certain, "do you want me to do it?"

Shelby shook her head, "I'll go do it now, where did you put his card?"

"It's in the top drawer of your desk with all the other stuff he gave us."

Shelby left the room and found the doctor's card exactly where Noah said it was, "Hi, it's Shelby Corcoran" she said after the receptionist put her through, "Noah and I have talked things through and we've made a decision."