CHAPTER SIX
I'm Not Made Of Glass
The music was playing at a low volume from the area in the basement that Ana had taken over long ago as her personal 'dance studio' and Sonny found himself standing in the doorway just watching his daughter, wondering if it were actually safe for her and the baby she was carrying to even be moving around that much or like she was.
"Are you sure that's a good idea?" he asked as the Flo-Rida song came to a stop and she did also, sitting on one of the padded mats, leaned against a wall, drinking the bottled water in her hands as she took a few long deep breaths.
"I'm not made of glass, Daddy."
"I know, Ana, but the baby.."
"Dr. Westbourne specifically said it was okay to exercise, even encouraged me to keep on if I was in the habit of doing so. As long as it's nothing too strenuous, not like running 5ks or something. Said it'll make the delivery a lot easier for me." Ana said quietly as she looked up at her father, her bangs falling in her eyes.
"Running 5ks, huh? Did you do that?" Sonny asked as Ana nodded and smiling a little said "A few times. I liked the color runs better, they were messy and fun, bright. I did it for charities on campus, me and a few of the other girls I roomed with there."
He looked at her wondering just how much of her life he'd been left out of while she was attending college in California. He felt like an outsider looking in. But things had been really strained between them before she left because he'd made her break things off with Alcazar's kid.
And apparently, she'd been upset by it.
And now, he found himself wondering if maybe Carly weren't right, maybe he should pick his battles with his kids, not try and be lord and ruler of all or their best friends.
Because he'd done both with Ana and there was no fine line, he knew that now. He shook his head and walked into the room, sat down beside her and asked her quietly, "It's not my fault, right? That Vincent guy.. If I'd just backed off.."
"Dad, no.. That was all on me. It was and is my mistake. I'm not some perfect little angel. I'm a human, last I checked humans make mistakes. Unfortunately for me, mine was a massive fuck up of epic proportions." Ana replied quietly as she took a long sip from her water bottle. "Have you tried yoga?" she asked as she looked at her father. He shook his head and she said with a slight smirk "It's good for tension and people under massive stress. Helps condition the body too."
A Lana Del Ray song came on and the door to the basement opened, Milo peeked in and said with a raised brow, "Are you okay, Ana?"
"I'm good, Milo, not made of glass.. Just established this with daddy. I was just exercising." Ana said calmly as she added with a friendly smile, "But thanks for checking on me. Hey, are you going into town?"
"Yeah, why?"
"Get me some of that chili from Kellys? And some of their cheddar biscuits. I wanna dip the biscuits in the chili.." she said as both males looked at her with raised brows. Sonny chuckled and Ana shrugged then said "What? It's not like I'm eating dirt or coffee grinds."
"That's just.. It doesn't sound good."
"I was thinkin the same thing, Mr. C." Milo mused as Ana gave him that pleading look that allowed her escape from the confines of bodyguards 24 7 and he was a sucker for. He nodded and when he left Sonny looked at Ana and said with a shrug, " Your mom.. She wanted mint pistachio ice cream and bananas." as Ana nodded and laughed a little, her hand going to her stomach.
They didn't talk much about her mother but Ana knew that to some degree, her mother's death had turned Sonny into the closed off guy he'd become, always quick to have a fling but never the one to settle. Maybe Olivia was changing that about him, she had to hope so, she worried about her father about as much as he did her, if not more because unlike all of her siblings, he'd been her only parent. He'd raised her from the age of 4 when they were reunited.
"I miss her too.. I mean I didn't get to spend much time with her.. But I can remember sometimes, somebody singing to me.. Sounded like it was in some other language." Ana admitted as she held out the water bottle to her father who took it and took a sip as he nodded and smiled a faraway smile for a few moments then said "She did.. I used to tell her she was going to have you speaking her language better than English. Used to make her mad as hell at me."
Ana laughed a little and then said "I took a course or two in how to speak it. Just to try and feel closer to her while I was in California."
"Did it work?"
"Kinda, kind of not." Ana answered as she looked at her father and then asked him "Are you and Olivia serious?"
"We are, actually. Why?"
"She's good for you. I worry about you, Dad, a lot." Ana admitted as Sonny slid his arm around her and said quietly, "And I worry about all of you guys. I missed you while you were gone. Wasn't the same around here, too quiet. I used to come down here and just sit for a few hours."
Ana smiled a little and then wiped at her eye as she pouted and said "Don't make the pregzilla cry." while laughing a little at her horomones.
He remembered why he'd come down to the basement in the first place and said carefully, "So, Dante called for you earlier. I tried to get you but the music... He wanted to know if you felt up to going to a movie with him and Lulu?"
"Depends.. Is he just asking to spend time with me, or is he being nosy buttinsky big brother again? He's tried all week to set me up with Nathan, his partner. I just.. I'm too afraid to trust anyone again, Daddy. I don't want to let anybody in again. What if I make a mistake and my kid pays for it?"
Sonny looked at Ana and said quietly, "If you hadn't met Vincent. And you were just home for a visit.. What would you have said?" just out of curiousity. He wasn't particularly fond of any guy, none of them were ever going to be good enough for either of his girls he thought, but he figured out of the 3 pursuing her, if one didn't consider Milo's silent attempts, Nathan was the lesser of the evils.
He wasn't a bad guy, it was just his being on the PCPD that concerned Sonny. He knew how Lulu worried everytime Dante's work phone went off. Wasn't sure if he wanted Ana to worry like that.
She shrugged and said quietly "I might have said yes. He's pretty hot and he seems like a decent enough guy." which made Sonny groan and try to cover his ears.
"Good.. Because I thought that getting out was good for you so I told Dante and Lulu that you'd go with them. I don't think Nathan will be there, but just knowing you're out with Dante will make me feel better. You won't be cooped up in here jumping at shadows and going stir crazy. The fear is only gonna make Vincent think he's won."
She sighed. Her father was right. But she was so damn afraid of Vincent now, of most males in general, it was hard for her to break the habit.
She gave him a scowl for a moment and then her scowl softened and she said with a smile "Okay, Dad.. I get the hint."
"You said it yourself, Ana, you're not made of glass. And you used to have one hell of a lot more fight than you do now, kid. I hate it, seeing you beaten like this."
"I'm trying, dad."
"I know. But you got out. I'm proud of you for that alone. It's hard.. Your grandma never managed to get out and away from Deke. It wound up being her worst and last mistake. Lots of women don't get out in time."
Ana nodded and went upstairs to get ready, her father's conversation playing in her mind as she did so and she wondered if Dante did have an alterior motive for asking if she wanted to tag along tonight.
"Just give it a chance. Dante's hardly got time for anything with work and being a dad. It'll be nice to spend time with your big brother. Just do your best to deal with Nathan and not let yourself get caught up or seem too cold. Just gotta have a little balance." she told herself aloud as she put on a little makeup, got ready to go out.
Maybe, eventually, she'd be okay again.
At least she'd gotten out and she was alive, she had a baby on the way that was safe and would continue to be so thanks to her decision to get out before it was too late.
That counted for something, right?
