Reaching for the Stars
Part I, Chapter 9 – Finale

Tainaka Residence [ S ]

December 24, 2014, the day of Christmas Eve. Pockets of snow painted the sidewalks in powdery white and covered patches of earth that would become brown of green in the springtime. The sun peeked from behind lines of white clouds rolling through the horizon of pale blue, shooting rays of brightness to pierce the blandness that is winter.

I watched this scene from the comfort of my bed, looking out the bedroom window as if it were a picture on the wall. I had just woken up a few minutes ago, the ray of light caressing a bit of warmth against my cheek. The sunlight was so bright and warm that it seemed to prod me to spring up from my bed and come downstairs for breakfast. Sorry sun… that won't be working this time. Pulling the bed sheet over my face, I turned around and tried to drift back to sleep.

Just then, I picked up a faint, faint sound. It was a silent one, barely audible, but I heard it. It was the sound of the doorknob turning slowly, followed by the weak creaking sound of my bedroom door being carefully opened. An intrusion, huh. There's only one person in this household mischievous enough to try sneaking into my room that early in the morning… Ritsu. She's done this before, catching me by surprise most of the time unless I was really burned out. These pranks of hers gave her much enjoyment… at my expense of course and I wanted to get back at her at least once. Rather than apprehending her off the bat, I chose to play along. She wanted to surprise me, so I planned to surprise her instead. I was going to enjoy this.

Careful measured steps got louder and louder as their source seemed to approach my bedside. The sound of rubber slippers against the hardwood floors was distinct and their squeakiness was unmistakable. Judging by the direction I assumed she was moving in, she must be trying to tickle me; a common practice of hers in those little pranks of hers. She expects me to be asleep, so what would she think when I jump out at her and beat her to the punch! Yes, that would be sweet.

Resting on one elbow, I prepared to pounce. I was going to make the hunter become the hunted. The steps grew closer and closer till she seemed to be just next to the nightstand. This was my chance. Springing up from the sheets, I pushed the bed sheet off me with fingers raised, ready to tickle, and a face that would've scared the crap out of her. The only thing I saw in front of me though was a pair of rubber slippers thrown to the floor; Ritsu was nowhere to be found. A feint!? That must mean…

"OHAYOOOOO!!!~*"

From behind, eight fingers struck at my ribs and uncontrollable laughter ensued. I didn't want to laugh, but I… I… couldn't help it!

"Thought you could give me a dose of my own medicine huh?" Ritsu challenged, her fingers unleashing unforgiving salvos of tickles on my undefended sides, "Well, have some more of this!"

"S… stop it Ritsu!" I cried in between hysterical laughter, escaping her clutches to catch my breath, "What do you want!?"

"It's time for breakfast, dummy!" She replied, sticking out her tongue, "So get off your lazy ass and let's go!"

"Why are you waking me up so early?" I groaned, managing to go out of range of her tickle strikes. Turning to my nightstand clock though, I saw that it wasn't as early as it seemed. The damn thing read 10:30AM! Argh… in winter, it's really hard to determine whether or not it's still early. The skies are usually the same throughout the day and the sun barely moves at all. Yawning, I scratched my head and sat upright.

"Maybe you should take a bath too," Ritsu suggested, "your hair is messed up dude."

"Eh?" I asked confused, "Are we going somewhere?"

Customarily, I took my baths in the evenings to save myself the trouble of bathing in the morning unless the family was going on a trip wherein I had to look my best. Oftentimes, it was such a hassle for me to step through jets of overly hot or overly cold water when I was still half-asleep so I chose to bathe in the evenings when I'm fully capable of measuring the temperature.

"Nope." Ritsu said shaking her head, "It's just that I have some visitors coming over for the Christmas party."

"Oh…" I said, my face warming up a bit, "does that mean she's…"

"That's right." Ritsu prodded, "She'll be here too, so hurry up."

"Yes ma'am!" I cried, mustering up some energy and rushing to the bathroom. Ritsu chuckled at my sudden burst of energy, but smiled. Once I was gone, she sighed and looked around my room for a while.

"He's a disorganized boy," Ritsu thought, noting the messiness of the room, "he can't even fix his own bed after waking up, but…"

Turning to the bedroom door though, she felt as if something was changing. I'm different from the Satoshi I was over a month ago, she thought. In many ways that was true. She didn't know whether it was a good thing or bad, but she knew I was headed somewhere. That was enough for her.

"Until then," she said, fixing up the bed sheet, "I'll be there for him, and guide him in the right direction."


After Brunch

That was a good brunch I thought to myself, rubbing my stomach as I reclined on one of the dining chairs in the kitchen. It was an American brunch; sunny-side up eggs, potatoes and some Canadian bacon Francis' family had sent us before they left. I ate quickly, downing spoonfuls of food like there was no tomorrow as Ritsu and I were locked in a silent dispute about who would get the last strip of bacon. Tall glasses of orange juice accompanied our breakfast to prevent us from getting stopped by hiccups, making the competition fierce.

As a surprise though, neither of us got to the last strip of bacon. Instead, it was our mom who ended up taking the last strip. She had slyly joined in on the contest while Ritsu and I were too busy glaring at each other. The three of us laughed at the predicament and sighed contently. Father however stayed silent as all this was going on; clearly, he wasn't amused.

I knew all too well what was going on through his mind; the grades. It's been two weeks since the make-up exams and there has been no word on the grades I got. I tried my best to remain apathetic to the grades I got, but I had a bad feeling about dad's reaction to another low grade. Shrugging, I carried on finishing the rest of the food on my plate then bringing the plate to the sink. Ritsu and I then left for the living room where we were going to wait for her friends to arrive, leaving dad alone with mom.

Recently, my family has been getting closer and the crevices that had formed in the years of decline were slowly being bridged. Mom and I were never really close, but I could see her efforts in trying to bring me and Ritsu closer to her which I appreciate very much. Despite these efforts, father has been cold to my mom and I for as long as I could remember. Still… I hope that things would be alright.

Ritsu and I entered the living room and I quickly got on to lie down on one of the sofas as Ritsu set up the Playstation 360* gaming console in front of the TV. From where I lay, I looked up to the ceiling and asked,

"Ritsu, do you think dad's being a little cold on mom recently?"

"Tell you the truth…" Ritsu said a little sadly, "I think he has been… would you happen to know why Satoshi-kun?"

"I don't know…" I apologized, "but… could it be about me, you think?"

"Satoshi-kun…" Ritsu said, not liking what I just said, "don't think that way. It's probably just a couple's quarrel… everyone has their conflicts you know."

"I hope so." I sighed, "It's just that, even though I don't show it, I love this family of mine. I don't want it to fall apart, no matter what. I'd do anything to keep it together."

"That's good." Ritsu said hooking up the console to the TV, "So Satoshi-kun, would you mind getting the RockBand Hero* instruments from my room?"

"Rockband Hero?" I said sitting upright, "You're setting that game up?"

"Yeah, so hurry up!" Ritsu suggested, "If we do it quickly, we could have a quick game before they arrive."

"A challenge huh?" I said getting up on my feet with a grin, "I accept your challenge dear sister. Prepare to get owned!"

"Remember those words dear brother…" she said grinning back, "cause you're gonna find yourself in the dumpster when I'm through with you!"

"You're on!" I said, marching upstairs to fetch the instrument controllers. Since it was going to be a showdown, Ritsu and I would have to play at the same time meaning only one of us would be able to use the drums… my second strongest suit in that game would be singing, but I felt a lot more comfortable holding drumsticks instead of a microphone.

Just as I pondered this predicament as I traversed the staircase though, the doorbell rang. Were they here already? Shaking my head, I carried on to my sisters room and left with the controllers in tow; a bass, a guitar, a drum set and a microphone. Heading downstairs with the controllers, I saw Ritsu opening the front door behind which stood the other four members of Afterschool Tea Time. Now I have an excuse to back down from the challenge. Man, was I glad to see them!

"Sorry to intrude!" The four of them said as they walked into the anteroom and took off their snow-covered shoes. Wearing the slippers mom had prepared for them nearby, they entered the house and went straight to the living room. I lagged a little behind, carrying all those controllers but eventually joined them in the living room where the Playstation 360 was already set up.

"Satoshi-kun!" Yui-senpai greeted with a wave, "Why are you here?"

Umm… I live here?

"It's Ritsu's house you dummy." Mio-senpai reminded, "Of course Satoshi's gonna be here!"

Thanks for pointing out the obvious Mio-senpai. Man… can't Yui-senpai get anything straight?

"Oh right…" Yui-senpai said in realization, "Ahehehe, sorry about that."

"Satoshi-kun." Azusa-chan then said as I dropped off the controllers near the console, "Hi…"

"Hey Azusa-chan." I greeted back a little awkwardly, "W… what's up?"

"Why are you all dressed up?" Azusa-chan said, noting that I was quite dressed up, "You also fixed your hair up…"

Argh! She noticed. Well… it couldn't be helped. I got too worked up when Ritsu told me Azusa-chan was coming, I guess. What am I going to do now!? Trembling on the inside, I could barely breathe as she seemed to blush somewhat. Did I overdo it? The words that followed however caught my by surprise.

"I like it."

A pleasant surprise, that is.

"You think it's alright?" I said, trying to avoid her eyes, "I'm not really used to dressing up like this, and my hair's usually a mess and…"

"You look good like this Satoshi-kun!" Asuza-chan reassured, "You should try fixing it more often, you know."

"I'll try…" I said, laughing uncomfortably. I guess that means I'll start actually using shampoo regularly when I take a bath. Changing routine on a girl's whim like this, how pathetic am I? Seeing myself in the mirror, I seemed different from what I usually looked like but I really did look better somewhat. Maybe she's right after all.

"Anyways, get over here you two" Ritsu interrupted, gesturing Azusa-chan and me to come closer, "we have a game to play."

"Eh?"

"You think I forgot about our little challenge Satoshi-kun?" Ritsu asked with devious eyes

For a moment, I was hoping she really did forget about it. I guess there was no escaping this challenge. For this contest, the people playing would be me, Azusa, Ritsu and Mio-senpai. That being said, Azusa automatically chose to play the guitar while Mio-senpai played the bass, leaving the debate of who got to play the drums to the two of us. The belligerents were Ritsu and I and the battle would be a coin toss; a decisive coin toss. Tsumugi-senpai would perform the toss and the winner would be able to choose who gets to play the drums. It would then be in my best interest to win it. Fate however, was not on my side.

"I win!" Ritsu cheered as Tsumugi-senpai showed us the tail end of the five-kinsu coin. I had chosen heads and Ritsu chose tails… darn it! Now I'm going to have to sing!

"I say…" Ritsu said with some thought as she held the coin victoriously, "that Satoshi-kun would play the drums."

Eh?

"I promised the girls I'd let them see you play the drums." Ritsu explained, "We never got around to arranging a full band session for that, but this was the next best thing."

"That's right!" Tsumugi-senpai said from her seat on one of the sofas, "We want to see you play Satoshi-kun!"

"Yeah!" Yui-senpai added energetically, "We were actually planning to sneak you into Sakura-gakou with a girl's uniform so we could have a jam session, but we couldn't do that in the end, ahehehe."

Oh… I remember that plan. I remember that all too well… Thank God I didn't have to go through that predicament.

Ritsu handed me the game drumsticks as she took the microphone. Ritsu, though not well known for her singing, is a decent singer to say the least. She pales in comparison to Yui-senpai and Mio-senpai of course, but she sings in tune and with the right tempo. The good tempo probably comes from her experience with percussion instruments. The drummer usually carries the beat of the song on his or her shoulder after all, so this comes as no surprise.

Yui-senpai, not wanting to be reduced to a mere member of the audience, was given the controller and was tasked to pick three songs for us to perform. The mere fact that it was Yui-senpai choosing the songs to be performed made me cringe. Covering the screen, she chose her three songs then hit the start button. A game of chance again… I hope I get some easy songs. One of the conditions that Ritsu placed when she let me drum though was that I would have to play on Extreme difficulty… damn her, so familiar songs would be great. The first two songs Yui-senpai chose however were way too familiar…

The first song she chose was Cagayake! GIRLS, which was their frontrunner song in the album they released earlier this year. It was a familiar song, but the tempo was really fast! Argh! I finished the song with 91% hits; a great achievement considering the difficulty and the speed of the damn song. It was a good song, don't get me wrong though. It was just hard to play… and way too girly for me to ever consider singing along to. The next song was Don't Say, the last track of the album. It was somewhat easier than the first one, but I still found myself rubbing my sore wrists after the song ended. Was she trying to sell their album to me perchance? After that troublesome encounter with their flagship songs, I doubt I'd buy a copy for myself. Besides, Ritsu already uploaded (against my will) the CD to my MP3 player.

The third song she chose however seemed to have come from a genuine purpose rather than advertisement. For the third song, Yui-senpai chose Fireflies by Owl City; the song I played in Francis' garage with Kouji when the two of them were still in town. Exactly why Yui-senpai chose this, or the motive she or the others had in letting me drum this song a second time, for them… I don't know. Nostalgia struck at me for a moment, remembering the times that we've spent and the things they've told me. Taking a deep breath through, I shook off the nostalgia and looked forward to the TV screen. Clutching the drumsticks, I prepared to play the song that had been on my mind for quite a long time already.

As the first few beats fell into place, I started to understand why. I felt it; I was moving forward.


"That was awesome Satoshi-kun!" Yui-senpai and Tsumugi-senpai cheered in demi-unison. The song had just finished and I ended with 100% accuracy. Wow… I did that? Confused, I rubbed my eyes to see if I was reading the screen correctly. Indeed, the score underneath my name was 100%. Damn. I did it!

"Satoshi-kun!" Ritsu said, putting her arm over my shoulder, "You're almost as good as your big sister here!"s

"Or even better." I suggested with menacing eyes

"Keep dreaming."

"Good job Satoshi-kun!" Azusa-chan congratulated as well, "You're as good as Ritsu said you were. We should hear you on real drums next time."

"Definitely." I reassured, "On a real drum set on a live concert… someday."

"I'll look forward to that." Azusa-chan said with a smile

Someday…

A few more tournaments took place into the night and I was able to take a well-deserved breather. A little later, we took a break from the gaming and proceeded to have Christmas dinner. Once again, the food had a North American motif; butter-basted turkey, mashed potatoes with gravy and an apple pie to top it all off. The food was devoured in an instant and it seemed as if a hurricane had passed by. Someone there was hungry…

After dinner, at around 10PM, Ritsu and the others returned to the living room. Satisfied by the hearty meal, they headed upstairs to Ritsu's room to hang out. Naturally, I had no intentions to partake in that chill sessions so I stayed in the kitchen and washed the dishes for a change. Thought I might get started with that at least, I thought. When I was finished, I was about to head up to my room when I heard a heated argument coming from the master's bedroom. Curious, I crept by the walls and tried to listen in. It was mom and dad.


"I don't like it when you're like that to him." Mom said to Dad, "You might be giving Satoshi-kun the wrong idea."

"But you're being too soft on him, dear." Dad countered, "He has to understand that he can't stay the way he is."

"What do you want to do then, huh!?" Mom shouted, "Do you want me to ignore him? Do you want me to be cold to him? Do you want us to throw him out the house or something!?"

"No, no." Dad replied, "That's not what I meant. He's moving up to High School next year for Christ's sake, he needs to learn to grow up! I'm disappointed in that runt!…"

Disappointment? Could it be that…

"I got that kid's grades in the mail just now you know!" Dad cried, "His integrated Science exam was B!"

"B?" Mom asked, surprised that dad was reacting that way, "That's a good mark, dear! It's three notches up from what he originally got!"

"But he could've done better…"

"He was doing his best dear!" Mom pleaded, "You have to understand his position!"

"If that's all he can come up with after all of those people helped him out, then his best isn't good enough!"

How could he say this… I've worked my ass off for the past two weeks preparing for those exams. The highest grade I ever got in Integrated Science was a B-… I freakin' broke a damn record here! But… but that was all he could say about it!? Not a shred of appreciation? My best wasn't good enough!? The worst part of it all… he was taking all this out on mom. Though I couldn't see her, I felt that she was on the verge of tears.

Muffled chuckles and laughter pulsed from the upstairs where Ritsu and her friends were enjoying themselves in stark contrast to what I was hearing too clearly. They were oblivious to the goings-on on the ground floor. Damn it… Listening to these two contradicting sounds made a severe contradiction in my heart. Was all of this… happening because of me?

Faint footsteps descending down the staircase echoed in the distance and Ritsu peeked into the hallway where I was. She was looking for me, it seemed, to get me to join them and the rest. I however couldn't bear enjoying myself while all this was going on… I didn't want to do that after hearing what I've just heard. She gestured me to come over, but I stood still on that spot by the bedroom door. I wasn't going anywhere, and the serious look on my face showed her that something was wrong.

"Satoshi-kun…" Ritsu said walking nearer to me, "why are you…"

"Shh!" I hushed, telling her to come closer and listen. Unsure what the heck I was talking about, she reluctantly joined me and took the other side of the door. Her eyes then bulged in realization.

"Satoshi-kun used to do well, and not just in school." Father explained, "He used to have good grades… he used to have a lot of friends. What happened to him then? Unlike Ritsu, he's…"

"Ritsu, Ritsu, Ritsu!" Mom cried, "It's always about her, it's it? Are you telling me she's your favorite child? You're making that obvious to Satoshi-kun! I love my two children and I share my love equally. You should learn to do the same or else…"

"But what if Ritsu IS my favorite child!?" Dad cried, "So far, Satoshi-kun hasn't shown me anything to be proud of! He hasn't…"

"Is that really what you think of me?" I interrupted, opening the bedroom door ever so slightly. The two of them were surprised by the intrusion, finding themselves unable to speak.

"If that's what you really thought of me…" I said clenching my fist angrily, "then you should've told me sooner!"

"Satoshi-kun…" Mom reasoned, "Your father and I were just…"

"I know what the two of you were talking about…" I growled, feeling my heart beat so fast that my breath could barely keep up, "I'm not wanted here."

"Satoshi-kun!" Ritsu said, laying a hand on my shoulder genuinely concerned, "That's not what they were…"

"I don't care what the hell they're talking about Ritsu!" I shouted, violently pushing the worried hand off my shoulder, "Isn't it clear yet!?"

"Satoshi!" Dad cried authoritatively, "Now listen to me young man…"

"NO!" I cried back at the top of my voice, "You lot, listen to ME!"

The heated argument had gone so loud that the people celebrating upstairs came rushing down to see what was going on. Maybe they wanted to intervene, but they just stood there in utter shock; Azusa-chan and Yui-senpai especially so.

"Do you like Ritsu better than me because she's going to make it big!?" I demanded from my father, "Is it because of their popular band!?"

"Hey…" Yui-senpai said trying to speak "we're not…"

"Wait…" I interrupted, realizing that I was dragging an innocent group into the argument, "It's not their fault… it's mine."

"No," Azusa-chan said, "Ritsu's been telling us about this problem for a while now, and maybe we do have a part in it…"

"No Azusa-chan." I said more melancholy than angry, "It's my fault. Like my dad said, my best wasn't good enough… I'm still immature. I've stayed on the same spot for years and I never grew. I've been afraid to step forward. Only now do I realize it…"

"What are you trying to say Satoshi-kun?" Ritsu asked worriedly, terrified about what I might do, "Are you…"

"I've been moving forward these past few weeks," I said lowering my head, "yet none of you even saw it. Maybe I wasn't moving fast enough… maybe the steps I were taking were too small. I want to grow… I want to show you that I've grown. That's why… that's why I've decided; I'm getting the hell out of here."

Without another word, I rushed upstairs with all my might and entered my room. I locked the door and stuffed in whatever I had of value into a knapsack; my cellphone, a charger, some money and a few rations of food. I didn't know how far I was going to go, but I wouldn't look back. I had to be prepared for this since I would be on my own. Not long afterwards, there were many loud bangs on the door.

"Satoshi-kun!" Ritsu cried, "Are you out of your mind! Open this door!"

I remember the last time I opened the door for her… she comforted me and was there for me. I appreciate everything you've done for me so far Ritsu, but I want to stand on my own two feet for once… that's why I'm doing this.

"Satoshi-kun!!" Father barked, "Open this door this instant young man! You're making a terrible mistake!"

You're the one who made a mistake dad. All these years… I've gone through a lot, but not once did you appreciate them. Not one bit. I'm going away from here… to a place where people will appreciate me for who I am. I'm not going back!

"Satoshi-kun!!!" Azusa-chan pleaded, "Why are you going away!? I… thought you loved me!"

And I do love you Azusa-chan… I just don't deserve you. I'm still a disappointment; an immature fool who can't stand up for himself. Argue with me all you want, but that's the truth. You deserve a better man Azusa-chan and I deserve worse than this. This is something I should've done a long time ago…

I looked around my bedroom one last time and found the drumsticks Francis had given me. I picked up the sticks and saw the engraving in the middle of the sticks. I'm taking hold of my life Francis… I know you'll hate me for doing this, but I'll grow. Just watch me. I slid the sticks into the bag and prepared to leave.

The banging grew louder, so I put on two jackets and slung on the knapsack. I opened the bedroom window and looked out to the night sky. Clouds covered the horizon… there wasn't a star in that sky. Just like my life, there were clouds that covered those shimmering stars. Winter skies were cloudy, I thought to myself, so on nights like these, no one could see those stars… no one appreciated them. I'll make those stars shine again… I'll do it with my own strength. I'll show them that I can reach for the stars.

Taking a deep breath, I crawled out of the window and dropped down into one of the bushes outside. From upstairs, I heard my bedroom door finally burst open followed by sighs of confusion. I didn't have much time left. I saw one of our old mountain bikes leaning against the wall of the garage so I took it and rode off into the night. Where the bike would take me, I didn't know. The only thing I did know… was that I was finally free.


An Hour later

"Huff, huff, huff, huff." I panted as I pedaled the old mountain bike as fast as my legs would allow me. I've been pedaling for the past hour and never stopped to look back. I've gone a long way from my house, but in which direction, I didn't know. In the heat of the moment, I didn't trouble myself with reading the street signs or finding out where I was going. I just moved forward as fast as I could. Before I knew it, I was out of the city and the urban structures that lined the road were replaced by long stretches of tall snow covered trees. I've gone a long way. My legs however grew tired and I decided to take a break. Pedaling off-road, I stopped by one of the more secluded parts of the forest and sat down for a rest.

I opened my knapsack to check on the things I'd been able to get in that scuffle; 2,327 kinsu in total and the food rations I had. The food rations consisted of three rice balls, a packet of melon bread, two cups of instant noodles and a chocolate bar. I had originally prepared these for late-night study sessions but they now served a more important purpose. This was all I had to live on for now... I had to make the most out of it. I opened up a rice ball packet and ate half of it to satisfy a slight hunger and to calm myself down a bit. Sitting down on the snow covered earth and leaning against the bark of a pine tree, I couldn't believe that I actually ran away from home. However, there was no turning back. No way in hell would I go back there. I was free and that was all there was to it. Just then, something in my pocket vibrated; my cellphone.

It was my father calling… I'm sure he wanted to have a good shout at me, so I didn't pick up. That cellphone was my one link to the past and the one means of communication I had. Also, the S.I.M. card could be used to track me down. Turning off the phone, I slid the S.I.M card out of the cellphone and looked at it carefully. It was a gold microchip that had some of my basic information stored inside. A symbol of my old self, I thought. In many ways, it was an effective symbol. There were indeed happy moments, shown by the gold, but that was only on the surface. Deep inside were other metals much less prestigious than the gold… it was empty in a sense. I was empty. With this newfound freedom, I'd fill that void up and be full.

Just then, in the distance, the sound of police sirens resounded in the night sky. Dad must've called the police to apprehend me. Without another thought, I broke the S.I.M. card and threw it away. I wouldn't need that old self anymore. I was starting anew. As soon as I shake off the police, I'll get a new S.I.M card to replace it… I'll get a new me. Gathering my things, I got back on the bike and went deeper into the forest.

I couldn't go back to the main streets anymore. Though I could pedal fairly fast, there's no way I could outrun police cruisers on this rickety old bike. Going to the more obscure parts of the forest was my only hope. I thought that going deeper into this unknown place, I'd lose the police. The police however were smart enough to send their 4-wheel drive patrol cars to come after me. Damn. I didn't have time to relax.

Pedaling faster and faster, it took me a while to realize that I was biking downhill. Since the bike was fairly flexible, I was able to distance myself from the police cars somewhat, prodding me to keep on going. If I keep going, I'll definitely…

Just then, to my utter surprise, I saw that I was heading straight for the edge of a cliff! Beyond the cliff was the river, half-frozen in the winter cold. I tried to brake the bike but I was going at such a fast pace that the bike's old brakes failed on me and I found myself flying off the bike and off the cliff! Shit! I closed my eyes, and in seconds, I found myself tumbling down the rocky cliff and rolling through the thick brush. I had managed to stop by the riverbank and was able to stand up.

I was dizzied by the fall and in pain because of all the scrapes and bruises I had along the way. Gritting my teeth, I sat down and watched as the bike crashed straight into a sheet of river ice and sank into the frigid block. Luckily, I had held on to my knapsack tightly enough to keep it from facing the same fate as the bike. This however, meant that I would no longer have a means of transportation.

Police sirens rang in the distance and I knew that they were going to close in on me soon. Then, this was followed by the sound of a train. Looking around me, I saw that I had landed somewhere near the railroad running below the cliff. A train was approaching in the distance and it seemed to be slowing down. It must be nearing a train station. Hearing the police sirens wail louder and louder, I was left with no choice. As the train passed by slowly, I jumped onto it and held on to one of the railings. I was able to climb onto the train and sneak into the cargo car. The door to the cargo bay had been left open, so I quickly snuck inside. I sat down beside a shipping container to tend to my wounds.

I made it… I'm free. Where this train would take me, I didn't know, but I was free. That's all that mattered for now.


Freedom.

Here is my first taste of freedom.

So this is what it's like to be free.

It's rather lonely, but I'll manage.

With my problems far behind, I have nothing to fear.

Leaving my past life behind, I have nothing to be ashamed of.

I had lost everything, so I have nothing to lose.

Freedom is sweet...

But where will it take me, is still a question in the wind.

I don't know.

I don't care.

I'll keep moving forward.

I'll move to a place where my efforts can be appreciated

No more harsh expectations like before

I'll move to a place where I can learn to stand on my own feet

No more relying on others like before

This was my life; I'll take hold of it.

This was my painting; my own strokes will create it.

I'll keep moving forward.

I'll show them that I can reach for the stars.


End of Part I


Epilogue [ O ]

"Is this where he…" Mr. Tainaka said as he looked over the cliff by the river, "where my son…"

Full of remorse, the policeman could only nod weakly.

"Satoshi-kun…" Mr. Tainaka said regretfully, "what have I done… because of me, you died…"

A slight trail of blood led into the frigid riverbank and parts of the old mountain bike stuck out from a sheet of ice. From where they stood, it seemed as if Satoshi Tainaka had died. That was the initial police hypothesis, but they couldn't tell for sure until they find the body. They would have to wait for spring for the ice to melt, but it might be too late by then. The body would've drifted away in that time.

Gone without a trace, that's what Ritsu Tainaka thought was the state of her beloved brother. She refused to believe he was dead. Looking out to the scene of the 'crime', the evidence was overwhelming but Ritsu refused to believe it.

"He's still alive…" she told herself with saddened hope, "I know he's still alive. I'll find you Satoshi-kun. I swear."