Sorry I kept missing updates! School has been keeping my busy! So here you go babes!

Chapter 9 Regrets:

Ralph watched as Roger stood and descended the mountain, letting the blood from his lip run down his face and chest (Jack had seriously like, taken a chunk off). He tucked his knees up to his chest, hugged his scratched up shins, put his head down and started to cry. It seemed the tears would never stop. How could Jack do that? What was wrong with him?

First he hates Ralph, then comes back to camp and slaps him, then kisses him. Ralph tells him to back off for a bit just in case, Jack gets mad because he loves him and now he is up here with Roger...

Ralph couldn't stand to think about it. He remembered scaling the mountain just as he heard a low resonating groan. At first he thought it was a pig but then he heard a voice say " Oh god, Roger..." The voice undoubtedly belonged to Jack Merridew. Ralph smiled and ran up the mountain and saw Roger sit up he wasn't wearing any clothes and he was moaning strangely, slightly bucking his hips. Then he saw Jack in front of him panting and biting his lip. Ralph snuck into a cave and continued watching. Ralph looked down to see them rubbing each others 'areas'. Ralph was confused at first he had never seen anything like this. It was only when Jack leaned in and pressed his soft lips against Roger's that Ralph had to cover his mouth to keep from crying out to Jack. Things only got weirder when Roger moaned as Jack bit him, the noises they made rang in his head like an alarm now.

Tears continued flowing. It wasn't that long ago when those lips were pressed against his own. When the body they were attached to held him up against a tree. Ralph remembered with vivid clarity the feeling of hot lust that ran through his veins when he felt the love of his life's chest against his, felt his lips against his, felt his tongue assault his mouth. The way his spine tingled when Jack's calloused hands passed over his hips. Ralph found himself running his hands up and down his legs, he longed for human contact, he wanted someone, anyone to caress him. Jack, Mummy, Daddy, Simon, Sam or Eric, Piggy, even even a clueless littlun to hold his hand would suffice at this point.

Ralph turned so his nose was buried in the crook of his elbow. He shook violently as loud painful sobs over came him as the memory replayed over and over with vivid clarity in his head. Ralph sniffed and wiped his nose. He put his fingers in his mouth and bit his nails. He closed his eyes and imagined a happy place. If only Jack could be here. Not the Jack that had kissed Roger. Not that Jack. "I want MY Jack back..." Ralph mumbled with a tiny wavering voice. It echoed through the small cave taunting Ralph. In the happy place, Jack would kiss Ralph on the cheek and run his fingers through his blonde would wrap his arms around Ralph, passing his hands over his hips and subsequently make Ralph's knees weak.

But Ralph couldn't be in the happy place. He was trapped in this hell hole of an island, trapped with the devil... Yes Ralph was in hell, and he had fallen in love with Asmodeus himself. (a/n Asmodeus is one of the 7 princes of hell, he is the demon of lust.)

The fair haired boy looked up from his knees and saw the clouds, the sky, the trees, the ocean. He heard the faint sounds of birds, the other boys, the ocean. He was at peace for a moment. Regaining his composure Ralph stood, wiped his eyes one last time, stood tall and began toward the beach trying to look as strong and grown up as possible, on the inside however he only wanted to stay in that cave. He wanted to be held, be told everything was going to be okay. But it wasn't. Ralph knew that.

Jack sat huddled in a shelter cross legged staring at the precariously placed leaf wall. "What have I done" he thought, "Jesus Christ what is wrong with me! Ralph must never know of this. I wanted revenge but I think I took it too far. Maybe I should have just said I did that, but if Rog found out... Oh god what if Roger tells someone, what if Ralph catches wind of this! No Roger wouldn't tell he's straight, he'd be too embarrassed. Plus he's my best friend so he probably wouldn't want to make me look weird either. But what if Roger hates me now... he'll tell Ralph, and the others, then they'll hate me too..." Jack sat panicking and overthinking. Eventually the thought of complete rejection from the group became too much for him to handle, Jack started to cry. He wasn't loud more just allowing tears to fall. He wasn't sad, he was, for the first time in a long time, scared.

Scared of what Ralph would say, of what Roger will think of him now, but most of all of himself. What has he become, how could he do something so awful to the one thing that he loved. Ralph was the only good thing on this island, an angel sent for Jack to love and be challenged by, but instead of moving forward to prove his love for him he took the evil path and chose revenge. What had happened to the choir boy who at one time was too scared to kill a piglet. Jack couldn't even remember what that boy looked like.

Oh how he longed to kiss Ralph again, how he wanted for it to have been Ralph on that mountain instead of Roger. He wanted to feel the warmth of Ralph's body against his, hear him gasp as he passed his hands over his hips and feel him move his hands along his chest. Jack opened his eyes again, he heard shuffling on the beach coming towards the shelter. Roger? No he came back a while ago. Piggy had run up questioning his lip to which Roger had told him "Go fuck yourself you fat basket case". He looked through a small hole in the leafs, and saw Ralph. Jack's heart skipped a beat and with a look of pure desperation on his face he exited the shelter, he fully intended on kissing Ralph, letting him know that he was his. Whether Ralph wanted it or not.

Thank you so much for reading and just for you as a special treat for my babies, a fake chapter 9 I sent to my friend as a joke!

Chapter 9 The end:

Ralph finished crying on the rock and stood up. Roger had left a while ago so Ralph went ahead and cried as loud as he wanted. He began to descend down the rocks and stumbled, hurting his wrist. "Shit!" He yelped and rubbed his arm. He continued cursing all the way back to the beach.

Jack was huddled in a shelter. He wasn't crying, he just sat with his knees tucked to his chest. He had just done "that" with Roger, his best friend. This was certainly one of the most fucked up things he had ever done. He heard sand shuffling outside and exited the teetering shelter. Ralph stood staring at Jack. He felt a lump forming in his throat as he thought back. At first he was confused seeing Roger bent over in front of Jack. Then he noticed they were both hard. He snuck up into a cave and he sat, watching. Jack had kissed Roger, that was all Ralph cared about. He had no idea what Jack was doing other than that.

Jack immediately tried to meet Ralph with a kiss, to apologize. He had no idea Ralph had even seen them. He just wanted to feel Ralphs soft flesh against his. The regret was burning him up. Ralph but up his arms defensively. Ralph couldn't even stand to look at him. Jack was in infuriated by this. Jack figured that Ralph was once again toying with his emotions. Jack couldn't stand it. He grabbed Ralph by the wrist and dragged him into the forest. He threw him to the ground and took a fist full of blonde hair. He smashed the back of Ralph's head into a root and yelled profanities. He was straddling Ralph rendering him helpless. Jack leaned in and kissed Ralph, biting hard on his lip until Ralph had to scream in pain. Jack quickly inserted his tongue and continued to snog him keeping him quiet. Jack was practically choking Ralph. He pulled back and began to beat his head with a rock. Screaming and crying Jack continued until brain matter oozed onto the ground and Ralph stopped screaming. Jack stood and kicked Ralph. Jack turned and walked away grinning. Now he was his forever. He had pulled him into a secluded area and planned to keep him there. Have his way with him whenever he so desired. Jack had finally snapped.

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