Chapter 9: Home or Away?

"Hello world
Hope you're listening
Forgive me if I'm young
For speaking out of turn
There's someone I've been missing
I think that they could be
The better half of me
They're in the wrong place trying to make it right
But I'm tired of justifying
So i say you'll..

Come home
Come home
Cause I've been waiting for you
For so long
For so long
And right now there's a war between the vanities
But all i see is you and me
The fight for you is all I've ever known
So come home
Oh

I get lost in the beauty
Of everything i see
The world ain't as half as bad
As they paint it to be
If all the sons
If all the daughters
Stopped to take it in
Well hopefully the hate subsides and the love can begin
It might start now.. Yeahh
Well maybe I'm just dreaming out loud
Until then

Come home
Come home
Cause I've been waiting for you
For so long
For so long
And right now there's a war between the vanities
But all i see is you and me
The fight for you is all I've ever known
Ever known
So come home
Oh

Everything i can't be
Is everything you should be
And that's why i need you here
Everything i can't be
Is everything you should be
And that's why i need you here
So hear this now

Come home
Come home
Cause I've been waiting for you
For so long
For so long
And right now there's a war between the vanities
But all i see is you and me
The fight for you is all I've ever known
Ever known
So come home
Come home" OneRepublic

The road to Maureen's is empty and windy. The wind whips fiercely at his face, the tires of his bike bounce over stone and rock. The narrow roads of Belfast can barely handle the roar and shake of SAMCRO; a pack of wolves' hungry and ready to feast upon its fresh prey. Jax's fingers grip the rubber handles as tightly as his muscles will allow; the flesh of his fingers turning white inside his gloves. Even with sunglasses, his eyes squint into the bright yellow of the sun. 'Almost there, just a few more miles. Almost there.' He shifts into a different gear and the bikes behind him echo in ferocity. Clay allowed him to lead the pack. 'Your son, your ride.'

The bikes take their final turn onto a narrow alley; a beat up looking crew is waiting. Bats, wrenches and fist all prepared to battle once more. This time will be the last. Jax has a choice, make a break for Maureen's apartment, or stick it out here and give Jimmy the beating he deserves? The man's crisp linen suit is a stark comparison to the bikers standing behind him; he needs to be a little dirty, a little bloody. Knowing that his son isn't actually here makes the idea of bashing in Jimmy's head that much more possible. But Clay points him to the door at the top of the stairs. "You go; it's my turn to take down these assholes. Find Abel." As he glances around and takes in the group of disgruntled Irish bikers, his mouth salivates and his fists itch for the taste of flesh; his nostrils flare at the smell of dried blood and the hope for the new iron smell of fresh. For the first time since he told Tara, "I'm done." He's thinking with a clear head. He needs to fight for his son, just like Tara fought for both of them at home. She's in "the wrong place trying to make it right", when she should be beside him. He'll finish this for Abel and for Tara.

Jax squares his shoulders and hits one fist against his open palm.
"Alright ladies, we do this fair and square. No guns, no bats just fists; like men, not like pussies." The Irish drop their weapons and put up their fists. Jimmy stand to the side, a smirk dancing across his face. Jax reminds himself to wipe that off him later.

Two sides collide into one. Fists hitting fists. Arms pulling. Feet kicking and punches thrown. Blood seeps from open wounds. Black eyes. A broken nose. A head butt. A headlock. Grunting. Panting. Painful groans. Upper cuts and kidney punches. A knee to the face. Repeated punches and blood spewing from the mouths of the ones hit. The sickening sounds of bone against flesh and the thwack of fists and the falling bodies. Jax catches a weak fist to the ribs and uses an elbow to the bridge of the Irishman's nose to bring him down. Opie has one man in a headlock, trying to bring him to his knees. Clay got one man on the ground using both fist to pummel the man's face. Finally when one man is left standing, Clay puts his hands in the air. "Enough!" The boys drop their victims and the bodies fall to the pavement with a dead thud. McGee tries to shrink away, but Clay bears his foot down onto his chest; that stops him. It's just Jax and Jimmy now.

Jax advances and Jimmy pulls his sidearm from his holster and puts the cold steel against Jax's forehead. Jax pushes against it. None of them move, afraid the slightest movement with set Jimmy off but, their hands twitch at their sides, waiting. Jax continues to stare at Jimmy; refusing to back down. "Pull the trigger pussy. Pull it."

"Shut up. Ok, just shut up. You open your mouth one more time and your men are going to watch you drop to your knees in front of me."

"You're too much of a pussy to pull that trigger. You would have done it by now."

"Shut the fuck up!"

"Pussy." Jax sing-song voice sends Jimmy into a rage. His fingers grip the trigger tighter, sweat dripping from his brow, his nostrils flaring. "Pussy." Jimmy tightens his arm and presses the mouth of the barrel further into Jax's forehead. Jax firmly sets his jaw and sneers at the man in front of him. "Puss…y!" Jimmy's wrist wobbles and he goes to wipe the sweat from his brow. Before his fingers rasp against his skin, Jax pushes the gun toward the ground and the two men begin to struggle to gain control. Jax ends up on the ground, Jimmy on top. A shot rings out. SAMCRO hesitates for just a second before slowly advancing. The Irishmen slowly come too. Jimmy's body rolls off Jax and Clay runs towards his son. "Jax?"

"I'm alright." He takes Opie's outstretched hand and picks himself off the ground and looks down at Jimmy; blood pooling around him, flowing from the hole in the side of his neck like a faucet on full force. "It's over now."

Jax climbs the stares to Maureen's apartment, a young girl awaits him. Her hair is tinted strawberry blonde and those eyes, "I've seen those eyes. That shape, I've seen it before." She opens the door for him and with a scowl, runs to Jimmy's dead body, gripping his shirt tightly in her tiny hands. Maureen is sitting at the table, an untouched cigarette burning between her fingertips; knowing full well what just went down. Jax sits across from her, but leans back in the chair. "You're Old Man's still alive." She grinds the tip of the cigarette into the glass ashtray and looks behind her. Father Ashby appears. "Hello Mister Teller."

"Mr. Teller was my father. Jax is just fine."

"I hear ya been looking for a wee one of yours."

"Actually I just always wanted to see Ireland, felt like this was the perfect time."

"No need to use sarcasm with me lad. I know what ye's come lookin' for. I'll take you to the laddy."

"How do I know I can trust you? That you're not going to walk us right into a firing squad?" Maureen stands and puts a hand on his shoulder, "Ye father trusted us." Jax gives her a confused look.

"My father?" He waits for her to nod and when she does, he notices a veil of guilt in her eyes. Eyes. Trinity. That's where he knows those eyes from. He wrings his hands together until they hurt and then he stands up. "How do you know John Teller?" Maureen finally realizes that John never told them.

"I'm sorry. I thought ya knew."

"Know what exactly?"

"Your father and I well, we uh, we loved each other. At least for a little while. We had Trinity. I'm sorry; I thought ye knew about it. I guess I was wrong." Jax looks to Clay whose rubbing his eyes with his hand, no doubt trying to wrap his mind around what Maureen just told him.

"Apparently there's a lot of things my father never told his family. Funny that you knew about us though."

"It's not like I planned for ya all to find out this way. If ye thinks I lured ya here by stealing your son just to tell you that your father and I had an affair, you're wrong." Visibly upset she turns and takes a few steps into what he presumed was her living room.

"I didn't mean for it to come out that way. I'm angry at a man I can't talk to, because he's dead and this is the kind of shit he leaves behind. Just tell me where my son is and we'll go back home." Father Ashby steps up.

"Is Jimmy dead?"

"If he wasn't when I left, he sure as hell is now."

"Then I will take ye to your son." Clay's head snaps to attention. His eyes burning into Father Ashby's. He can't help the words escaping.

"Excuse me? What do you mean, "Then I will take you to your son."

"I meant no harm by it." But Father Ashby's been caught. Even Maureen turns around to stare at her cousin.

"This has been a game to you. Didn't want Irish blood on your own hands. So you set us up to take these bastards down for you. At the expense of a little boy's life no less. And you're supposed to be a man of God." His advance is stopped by Jax's arm across his chest.

"Ya have no idea the reasons behind me actions." He turns to Maureen. "Ye daughter's been fooling around with Jimmy O. Getting her self caught up in the mockery he calls the army." His accent grows thick as his voice rises. "I didn't take that boy from ya, but I did keep him in hopes ye would come for him. What happened out there was McGee's doin'. He's been a traitor all along. I just prayed things would end in ye's favor. Listen lad," He goes to put he hands over Jax's shoulders but he angrily steps back.

"Just. Just take me to Abel. Then SAMCRO is leaving this shit behind. We took out the IRA's leader. There all yours now. Like puppets to a master. I don't want to hear your reasons, I don't want to know about my father's life here, or if he's the reason this rift between you, SAMBEL and the IRA even exists. I don't care anymore. I want my son! He's a child, not a play thing and certainly not a bargaining chip!" Jax's anger is beyond the boiling point, in fact, it's starting to spill over and he wants to lunge at someone or something like a hungry wolf and tear the prey's throat out. The only prey standing before him is Father Ashby and will all the sins over his head, killing a priest will not be one of them. He bears his teeth and growls, his fist clenched tight. The taste of iron fills his mouth and slides over his tongue. It's then he realizes he's bitten into his lip, right through the fresh, pliant scab. "Dammit!" He hisses and stalks out of the small apartment and in the fresh air of nighttime. There's a lingering scent of blood hanging like a sheet, but it's better than the tense, thick fog of the apartment. He senses Opie behind him. "What kind of man would use a baby as a bargaining chip? They used him as a ploy to get us to rid SAMBEL of scum like Jimmy; instead of doing their own dirty work." Opie puts a hand against his friend's shoulder.

"They're not men, they're animals. And even animals protect their young."

"I just want to take Abel and go home. I want to climb into bed with Tara and Abel and just stay there."

"Well, like I said before. It's about time you pulled that pretty little head of yours out of your ass. It's a new look, I like it." Jax wants to tell Opie to shove, but he knows he's right. It's about time he realized that, no matter what choices he makes, he can't control the actions of others. There are crazy people born every day and they can go off on anyone for any reason. He can't protect his family from everything, but he can try not to piss people off just for the sake of pissing people off.

"You know Stahl's been arrested."

"No, I didn't. I mean, I knew about Tara's little kidnapping plan, but you never told me hat happened at the end."

"Stahl woke up with a swarm of feds pointing their guns at her car. Ripped the thing to shreds finding the real police report. She wasn't lying about that. Everything was in there and the tape the Grim's handed in as evidence did not help her case."

"So, we're good."

"Not quite. There's still that deal I made with her. But, according to Tara, the feds are considering looking the other way since we gave them Moran."

"So, they won't be waiting for us on the tarmac?"

"No, but we have a court date at the end of the month that none of us can miss. It's their way of getting us out of jail. We show up all clean and business like, they make sure Moran is legit and we get our 'get out of jail free' cards."

"All because of Tara."

"Yeah, but she won't take all the credit."

"She never would. So, how about we follow Father Watcha-ma-call-it outta here and get that boy of yours home."

"Sounds good." Clay rounds up the rest of SAMCRO and they follow Father Ashby to a little town south of Belfast; Lisburn.

It's along ride with several stops, but Jax refuses to lay over in a hotel. His nerves feel like he's holding a burning match while the flame approaches the skin of his fingertips. The air whips around him, the farms they pass impose on the air, the smell of freshly cut grass. He catches the lump inside his throat and bites back the tears. Just a few more hours Abel. Just a few more hours. The tires of the motorcycles rumble against the pavement, kicking up stray rocks. The engines vibrate and the men riding shift their feet against the bottom pedals and shift the clutch at their fingertips every so often.

A small farm comes to view. The land is well kept and the white house is pristine. Jax looses it. He breaks free from the pack, shifts the clutch and gives the bike the added gas. He finds the dirt pathway easily and stops his bike just before he plows into the stairs leading up to the porch. He doesn't knock he just burst through the door and into the living room. He's shocked to see all the bassinets, each one holding a baby. For a second he thinks he won't know what Abel looks like fears it's been too long; afraid he will take the wrong boy home with him.

But there, those crystal blue eyes shine like no other. The boy reaches his tiny hands out to him, a smile suddenly appearing. He drops to his knees at first, the blood rushing from his head. The woman behind the desk finally comes to his aid and helps him up. He doesn't look at her, doesn't say thank you; but hopes she understands. He glides through the rows, hopefully not jostling any of the other babies. He reaches out for his son and puts Abel against his chest. His smell is familiar. His weight is comforting. Jax's finally got him. He takes him from the living room and into the clearing. The rest of SAMCRO is there to meet him; the first to run to him is grandpa. Clay wraps both boys in a hug. Both men cry. Of course Opie, the voice of reason as of late speaks up first. "Uh, how do we get the little guy home?" Bobby smacks him upside the head.

"Didn't think we thought of that huh? There's a car seat in the truck we rented. We're not that stupid." Bobby starts to head back to the discarded bikes.

"Yeah, key phrase being 'not that'."

"You're a funny kid Opie. How about I make you swallow that humor of yours."

"Make me old man." The tension finally breaks and they leave Father Ashby in their dust. Jax places Abel in the rented car seat and switches places with Chibs. He takes the van and Chibs takes his bike. "Hey Jax?" He's halfway in to the driver's seat.

"Yeah?"

"Think we have time to head on back to Maureen's. There's some people I have to see."

"Yeah. We have all the time now."

The boys head back to Maureen's in need of formula and diapers. Maureen puts together what Jax will need and when he takes the bag from her, he pulls her into a hug. "I don't know what my father did, or what he said to you while he was here; I have no reason to hate you. But, this is it. This is where it ends."

"I know. It was finally nice to meet John Teller's boy. If I've caused any harm, it was not intentional." Her voice cracks and her accent grows quiet.

"I know." They say their goodbyes and Jax packs up the van; finding that he has extra cargo.

"Hi Fiona, Kerrianne." They smile back and Fiona leans towards the driver's seat.

"We're not imposing are we?"

"No, not at all." She sits back and Kerrianne puts her head in her mother's lap. A smile upon her lips and her eyes just as bright as Abel's. With one final glance at Maureen's, they all head home.

"Come home
Come home
Cause I've been waiting for you
For so long
For so long
And right now there's a war between the vanities
But all i see is you and me
The fight for you is all I've ever known
So come home"