I have total writer's block on Double Date...

Fang: So, she's on YouTube!

Me: Yesh, 'cause I want to get off hiatus and do something!!

Fang: And we've already watched all the FlockUpdates videos...

Me: And joined their website...

Fang: And made a fanpop group for them...

Me: Which no one has joined, by the way...

Fang: Please, go to fanpop . com and join so she'll stop complaining...

Me: Well, in the meantime...I'll do this video!

Warning: Profanity. I'll take out as much as I can, but there's some that I just can't change. I warned you.

I've been just waiting to do this one...


Mr. Wooden Alligator

Fang walked into the house and sat down at the foot of the stairs, bored. As he stared around the empty room, looking for something interesting, he suddenly spotted a little toy alligator sitting next to him.

"What the-?" He said, confused

Surprisingly, the alligator spoke up. "Well, hello, Fang! I'm a Wooden Alligator! Check out my red wheels!"

Fang looked down where the alligator's legs shood have been and saw four little red wheels instead. "Oh my God."

"They be bitchin'!" The alligator said proudly.

Fang couldn't believe any of this. "You're just a painted alligator! You can't be real!"

"Well excuse me, but you're the complete psycho talking to me!" The alligator pointed out.

"I'm the psycho? You're a stupid, painted alligator!" Fang shot back.

"Psycho!"

"Stupid, painted alligator!"

"Hotpocket!"

"What?!" Fang said, confused.

The alligator laughed.

"Why the heck are you even talking to me?" Fang asked. "You don't make any sense!"

"Look at me, Fang! Does it even look like I make any sense!" The alligator asked. "My pupils stay the same, I have red nostrils, my mouth is always open, and I have no butt!" He made a farting noise.

"Ugh! You're a bad alligator!" Fang said, disgusted. "A dirty, dirty alligator! I don't care about your butt!"

"Hey, crackerhead!" The alligator said. "Let me sew your butt shut and see how you like it!"

"WTF?!" Fang said.

"Ok, now why I'm talking to you." The alligator said, deciding to move on. "You need to get me out of here."

"For what?" Fang asked.

"I need to be released outside into the real world." The alligator explained. "I need to find a wooden lover so that I can make wooden babies."

"Well, I'll need to sneak you out somehow. How am I going to do that?" Fang asked.

"Well, you could shove me down your pants." The alligator suggested. "That might work."

"Ok..." Fang said, reaching for him. Then, he froze. "Wait, how do I know you're not going to.....bite me?"

The alligator just laughed.

"Ok, let's just go, I'll just carry you." Fang said, lifting the alligator off the floor.

Fang snuck the alligator out the back door and onto the porch. Outside, he saw Akila getting into something. "Akila, what are you- Ow!" He said, tripping on something. He dropped the wooden alligator and Akila jumped on the alligator, licking him.

Fang had a fit. "NO, AKILA! NOT THE WOODEN ALLIGATOR! NO, AKILA! QUIT BEING A DUMB DOG!!!! AKILA, NOOOO!!!! NOT THE WOODEN ALLIGATOR!!! HE WANTED TO MAKE WOODEN BABIES!!!"

Later, Dr. Martinez, Ella, and the rest of the Flock came home to find Fang resuscitate his wooden alligator. They decided it was best not to ask....


Fang: Ummm?

Me: And the best part? There's more....I might do another tonight!

Fang: Great...

Me: Beware of Mr. Wooden Alligator!

Mr. Wooden Alligator: Check out my red wheels!

Fang: Not going there...

R&R?