Disclaimer: I do not own Degrassi.
Author's note: I wish I had the perfect words to thank you all for your reviews and comments. You have no idea how much it means to me.
Clare
"You look sleepy. Did Eli keep you up all night?" grinned Alli mockingly.
"I wish," admitted Clare. "Both of my parents came home last night, just a couple of hours after you left. First thing they did? Started fighting with each other."
"Oh," said Alli uncomfortably. "Now I feel stupid for making that comment."
Clare shut her locker and sighed, rubbing her temple with her free hand. Her dad had only said hi to her briefly before going on a tirade against Clare's mom, about how she had left town without notifying him, leaving Clare all alone.
Clare tried to tell him that it was okay, that Alli had kept her company, but her dad wouldn't listen. When her mother arrived just a few minutes later, hell broke loose. The shouting had been too much for Clare to handle and she ran to her room, locked herself in her bathroom and just sat next to the the toilet, sobbing her heart out.
It wasn't possible to be so happy yet so miserable at the same time. Every moment she spent with Eli during the weekend had been perfect, even when he came over to her house and had to deal with Alli's accusatory glares. Clare had enjoying spending time with Alli as well, because somehow their relationship was reinforced during the weekend.
But her parents were still the same, still miserable with each other, still fighting. "Maybe they do need to get divorced," said Clare miserably.
"Oh, Clare, maybe it's just a rough patch," said Alli positively. "My parents went through one a couple of years ago and yet, they made it work."
"I don't know," said Clare, unsure of what would happen with her parents.
"Hey."
Clare turned around and smiled immediately at the sight of Eli.
"Hey."
Alli looked at both of them and rolled her eyes mockingly. "Okay, I'll leave you two alone to exchange monosyllables," chuckled Alli, and suddenly punched Eli in the arm.
"What did I do now?" winced Eli, rubbing the spot where Alli hit him.
"Just a reminder… that I'm watching you," said Alli menacingly and walked away.
"My arm is ten percent skin, ninety percent bruises now," joked Eli, and touched Clare's cheek gently with his hand. "You look tired."
"My parents got home last night," sighed Clare. "Minutes apart from each other. It wasn't pretty."
"Do you want to talk about it?" asked Eli in concern.
"Not right now," said Clare, smiling at him. "Maybe after school?"
She saw a flicker of hesitation in Eli's eyes but it disappeared at once. "I will have to check my busy schedule, you know," he mocked, and intertwined his hands with hers, moving closer.
"If you have a couple minutes to spare for Clare Edwards, that would be nice," said Clare breathlessly as Eli's lips got closer to hers.
"I'll see what I can do," teased Eli, and kissed her.
Clare didn't care that they were in the middle of the hallway, which was strange for her, she had always frowned upon public displays of affection. But Eli made her forget about her inhibitions for some reason, and she kissed him back fervently.
"We have to go to class," said Eli rather reluctantly.
"Oh, yeah, Miss Dawes will give us our papers back today," said Clare in mock enthusiasm.
Eli gave her a quick kiss and they walked to class, holding hands. Clare could feel people staring at them, but for the first time in a while, she didn't care at all.
Eli
"Hey, emo boy!"
Eli ignored Fitz's yells and walked on, trying to find Adam. He needed to give his friend a token of his gratitude for helping him out with Clare.
"Didn't you hear me talking to you?" snarled Fitz, grabbing Eli by his sleeve in a violent way.
"Oh, you were talking? Couldn't hear with the all that caveman grunting of yours," retorted Eli, and Fitz pushed him into a wall.
"You're dating Saint Clare now, eh?" growled Fitz angrily, his eyes filled with deep hatred. "I've got news for you, skinny pants. Have you noticed her purity ring? She doesn't put out."
"Ah, well, that's a deal-breaker," said Eli sardonically. "Thank you so much for letting me know."
Eli's eyes met with Fitz's again and he saw a trace of… jealousy? No way, he thought.
"Can I leave now? Or are you just enjoying this tender moment between us?" mocked Eli and Fitz let go of him.
"You're a pain in the ass," snapped Fitz. "Someday I will shut your mouth for good."
"I'm so scared," snorted Eli.
Fitz glared at him one last time and walked away hurriedly and Eli shook his head. Did Fitz like Clare? That was hilarious to Eli, and he smirked all the way to his locker. He saw Adam standing there, and tried to forget about the small incident with Fitz.
"I didn't see you at the lockers this morning, so…"
Eli handed Adam a Dead Hand t-shirt, and Adam gasped excitedly. "Dude, I've been wanting this one for ages!"
"I know," said Eli smugly. "Dad interviewed them ages ago and they had some leftover shirts at the station."
Adam hugged and sniffed the t-shirt, making Eli chuckle. "Wait," said Adam. "Do you need a favor or something?"
"No!" grinned Eli. "I just wanted to thank you for giving me a heads-up about Clare being all alone during the weekend."
"Oh, man, you need to tell me what happened!" squealed Adam, and Eli raised an eyebrow.
"Sorry, I overreacted," said Adam, clearing his throat. "What happened?"
"Well, to make things short, we are kind of dating," shrugged Eli. "Nothing serious or official yet."
"Why not?" asked Adam.
"We're just taking things slow," explained Eli. "I told her about Julia. So… yeah. We're hanging out after class today, she seems sad about something."
"Don't you go to therapy on Mondays?" pointed out Adam.
"Yeah, but she doesn't know that," said Eli, giving Adam a meaningful look. "I've never missed a session, it's not the end of the world. And it's not like they help me. I'd rather spend time with Clare."
"Hmm." Adam seemed upset but Eli chose to ignore that.
"I hope you liked the t-shirt," said Eli tentatively.
"I did, thanks," said Adam dryly. "Um, I have to go to class. See you later?"
Adam walked away huffily and Eli wondered if he had done something wrong.
Later
"That is a lie."
"No, it's not, Eli, and you know it."
"I know people keep comparing Palahniuk and Vonnegut, but they are quite different."
"I find them extremely similar."
"You're wrong."
They were laying under their favorite tree, with Eli's arms wrapped closely around Clare, his lips very close to her ear.
"You're very stubborn, Eli," chuckled Clare.
"That, I am," he said, and kissed Clare's earlobe. "Do you want to talk about your parents?"
"What is there to say? They hate each other."
"No, they don't," assured Eli. "They're just not getting along, that's all."
Clare didn't say anything, so Eli just embraced her tighter. He liked to have her body very close to his, it was as if her warmth was keeping him sane. Eli wanted to help Clare forget about her problems, which was quite funny seeing how he needed to figure out his own problems first.
He pressed his lips against Clare's cheek and heard her sigh loudly. "When Darcy left, I thought that we were going to be okay. But I was wrong."
"Have you heard from her?" asked Eli as Clare brushed her fingers against Eli's hands.
"No. Not yet. I don't think she cares about us anymore."
"Clare…"
"She e-mailed my mom last week to inform her that she is dating some guy. That's all. She hasn't replied to my e-mails."
"Maybe she's busy."
"Eli, please."
"Or maybe she's just in denial. It happens."
Clare turned her head to face him, her blue eyes shining with repressed anger. "Her denial is not helping me at all."
"I know, Clare. I know it's not much help, but I'm here."
Clare smiled, a hint of sadness on her lips, but she smiled nonetheless. "Kiss me, Eli."
Eli obeyed and their lips met, a slow and passionate kiss, and Eli sucked gently on Clare's lower lip. She moaned softly and he realized that they were in public, and continued to kiss her slowly.
"Your phone is vibrating," said Clare as Eli moved to her neck.
"Probably my parents," mumbled Eli against Clare's neck. "They must be pissed off at me."
"Why?"
"I skipped my therapy session."
As soon as those words escaped Eli's lips he knew that he had made a mistake. Clare pushed him away gently and stared at him. "Therapy?"
"I have to go to therapy every Monday for the rest of my life," said Eli bitterly. "First time in a year that I skip it. No big deal."
"Eli, I don't want you skipping it because of me!" said Clare in alarm. "You need to go!"
"Too late, I missed the appointment," said Eli, searching for Clare's lips.
"No, I'm upset with you now," said Clare, and pulled away from him. She sat up and looked through her backpack, and Eli sighed.
"It's no big deal," repeated Eli. "Dr. Porter and I never talk about anything, he's such a snob."
Clare put her backpack aside and crossed her arms, not looking at him.
"Are you really mad at me? Sorry for not telling you."
"I'm not mad," said Clare, still not looking at him.
"You look mad," insisted Eli, sitting next to her. "Don't be. I won't skip it again, I promise."
Clare finally looked at him and struggled not to smile. "Okay, as long as you keep your promise."
"You can call Alli so she can beat me up if I don't," smirked Eli, and Clare kissed him without warning.
Clare
Clare sighed happily as she closed the front door behind her, still thinking of Eli. She walked towards the staircase and noticed her parents sitting in silence at the dining table.
"Where were you?" asked Mrs. Edwards sternly. "You didn't come straight after school."
"Library," lied Clare. "Um… what's going on?"
"Sit down," said Mr. Edwards, looking tired and worn. Clare sat the dining table and glanced at her parents back and forth, waiting for the worst.
"We have some news for you," said Clare's mom.
Clare gulped and braced herself for the impact.
"Darcy is visiting in three weeks," said Mr. Edwards. "With her, um, fiancé."
"Oh."
"Yeah, this is quite unexpected," said Clare's dad, looking a bit disappointed. "But we want Darcy to be happy, just like we want you to-"
"Your dad is moving out," blurted Mrs. Edwards.
"You just couldn't wait, Helen-"
"What?" Clare's biggest fears became an inevitable reality, she finally had solid proof that her parents were separating at last.
"It's for the best," said Mr. Edwards with a tone of finality. "We tried to make it work, but all this fighting is ruining our family."
Clare stood up quickly and glared at both of them. "You just didn't try hard enough," she spat. "All couples go through times like these, you can make it!"
"I'm sorry, honey," sighed Mrs. Edwards.
"I hate you both," said Clare darkly, and felt nauseous at once. She walked away and considered where to go for a moment. She thought of going to church, but she wasn't so sure about her beliefs anymore.
She had prayed to God that her parents would find a way to stay together, and He didn't listen. Well, Clare was tired of that. She walked out of her house, just holding her keys and her phone. She dialed Alli's number and her best friend answered fast, sounded a bit out of breath.
"Clare, I'm with Drew right now-"
"They're splitting up."
"What? Drew, get off of me!"
Clare heard a thud on the other line and Drew muttering something.
"Clare, are you still there?"
"Yes."
"We'll come pick you up."
Alli hung up and Clare held on to her phone, with tears stinging her eyes. She thought of calling Eli, but she knew that he would be in trouble with his parents for skipping his session, and she didn't want to interrupt or make things worse.
She sat on the curb, wiping her tears away with her sleeve, waiting. Clare looked up to the sky, the clouds blocking the sun, and focused on the odd, cloudy shapes. The clouds seemed surreal, almost dreamlike.
Maybe this is all a dream, Clare thought.
Maybe it was only a nightmare.
