CHAPTER NINE: Under Pressure
"It's the terror of knowing,
What this world is about,
Watching some good friends,
Screaming, 'Let me out!'
Pray tomorrow gets me higher."
"Under Pressure" by Queen & David Bowie
They had been back in school for three weeks now. For three weeks, he and Lucy were in the same U.S. History class and never acknowledged each other. He sat in the back and tried to go unnoticed. Not hard to do when you're the only idiot in an AP level course. Wyatt could care less about every other class, but history…
He liked history or, more accurately, the history of war and the military. He always had. It started with his Grandpa Sherwin telling him stories from his days with the Army. Sherwin always made it clear that war was hard and not something to enter into lightly. It was a last resort. But, when the concept is respected and feared as it should be, it could be the right and honorable thing. Every war led to him reading about another war, conflict, minor standoff, and then there was military history in general. The test sites in the Nevada desert, the story behind the founding of the US Coast Guard, George Washington's bizarre rules on etiquette…
If it related to the military in anyway then Wyatt was invested. Mr. Everhart, the teacher of AP US History, spent Freshman year telling Wyatt to stick it out through the legal and political systems class because once that was over, World History and US History would be right up his alley. So, History became the one class he actually cared about. Everhart talked Wyatt into Honors World History the previous year and then somehow conned him into AP US History this year. He seemed to be the one teacher in the whole school who actually believed in him. How could Wyatt say no?
Mr. Everhart split them up into groups so they could discuss their reading from the night before. He knew being in this class with Lucy after she became his 'mentor' would be awkward, but he figured they could continue to ignore each other. Everhart had other ideas.
"Group #3...Logan, Preston, and Carlin."
Seriously? She might not have even known he was there if Everhart hadn't put them in a group together. He was very good at hiding in the back of every classroom. Lucy turned with a surprised face and found him in hunched down in his desk. She smiled brightly and gave him an energetic wave that exhausted him just watching it. He liked her. He did. She was cute, okay more than cute. Funny. Ridiculously smart. And good. So, so very good and kind. But - wow - was she ever enthusiastic about learning. It was tiring trying to keep up with her excited rambling. Though, he did enjoy the way her eyes lit up while she rambled.
Rufus Carlin, their third, was already on his way to the empty desk behind Lucy. Lucy smiled and fist bumped Rufus as he passed her and then turned back to Wyatt to wave him over. He let out a nervous exhale as he walked toward the front of the room. Did he let these two people in on how much he enjoyed history? Did he let them know he actually cared about this class? Lucy would never leave him alone if he did. His strategy was simple. Draw no attention to himself in class and then devour the textbook when he got home, after his shift at the garage of course. He had a mind like a steel trap so usually reading was all the studying he needed to do. The minute Lucy found out he passed World History Honors with an A and didn't even really try...he was done for. She would be on him to try in all his other classes.
He sat down in the desk next to hers and acknowledged her with an awkward nod. Behind her, Rufus looked anxious as he waved. Like Wyatt might decide to haul off and punch him at a moments notice.
"I didn't know we were in the same history class!" Lucy exclaimed as she slapped his arm and turned a teasing glare on him. "You didn't tell me Mr. Everhart put you in AP! You should have told me. You know I'm not going to see you when you sit in the back and hide in your seat."
That was kind of the point.
"Yeah, well, this isn't normally my scene."
Rufus chuckled to himself before nodding at Wyatt. "Mine either. I'm more of a robotics and engineering guy. But this one," he said as he jabbed at Lucy's shoulder with his finger. "Insisted I would like it. Plus, MIT likes a well rounded transcript as much as any other school, especially if I want a scholarship. Otherwise it's community college for me."
Lucy rolled her eyes at him. "You won't be going to a community college. You're a genius, Rufus. You know you are."
"Well, yeah, I am, but so are a lot of other guys who want to get into MIT," Rufus said with a grin and a shrug. "And I bet those guys have parents who can afford it."
"But are those guys one of three finalists for the Mason Program?" Wyatt asked him with a quirked brow. Rufus' head swiveled in his direction with a stunned expression. "Yeah, I heard about that. The whole school heard about that. If you get in, aren't you basically guaranteed a job after college?"
"That's the rumor," Rufus told him with a shrug.
"That's impressive, man," Wyatt told him. "If you can do that then a scholarship should be easy."
Rufus grinned at him and nodded. "Thanks, Wyatt."
"But first, we all need to pass this class," Lucy said with a chuckle. "So should we jump right in?"
"To the election of 1800?" Rufus asked. "You mean old white dude versus another old white dude? Oh wait, that could describe every election prior to 2008," he said in a dry tone before rolling his eyes. "I guess I should be more specific. You mean Adams versus Jefferson?"
Wyatt grinned at Rufus as he and Lucy began to discuss the chapter. Rufus was funny. He fired quip after quip at Lucy without so much as a pause to think. He liked him a lot. Lucy was right. He was a genius and proud of it, but he wasn't condescending to others. Wyatt found himself smiling and laughing as Lucy and Rufus went back and forth on the candidates and their background. The discussion wasn't at all as painful as he thought it would be. In fact, he was starting to think that maybe this wouldn't be so bad. He could do this. He could let these people in.
The discussion was winding down. Wyatt interjected here and there when the French Revolution or the expansion of the US Military came up. Mr. Everhart called them all back together and announced a test next week just as the bell rang. He felt a small jolt of anxiety but pushed it aside. He was too busy at work to study and it's not like he had ever needed to before.
He would be fine.
He could remember six chapters worth of reading.
No problem.
Okay, maybe it was a problem, but what could he do about it? He couldn't miss work. He couldn't. He had no choice.
Two days before the test, Lucy stopped by his locker while he was switching out his books. She leaned against the locker next to his and smiled warmly. Yet again, he was struck by how appealing she was to him. The more time he spent around her the more he noticed. Take, for example, her eyes. They were generally a chocolate brown, but if you looked closely the gold flecks in her eyes seemed to occasionally brighten them to a warm cinnamon color. He was still puzzling out why. He couldn't seem to help himself.
"Hey," she said in a chipper tone.
"Hey," he said with an irrepressible smile of his own. Smiling was beginning to be a problem, especially around Lucy. "You need something?"
She worried her bottom lip and his eyes were immediately drawn to it. He mentally cursed at himself and looked away. He focused on shoving his books into his backpack instead.
"Are you ready for our first History test?"
"I guess," he said with a shrug. "I've done the reading. We've talked it out. I should be good."
"Wait," Lucy said with a furrowed brow. "You haven't studied yet?"
No. Because unlike her, his studies were secondary to his single parent. He was expected to work at the shop long after closing. That was more important after school than his homework.
"Haven't had the time."
Lucy's admonishing face had him continuing his defense of himself without her having to say a word.
"Really, Lucy, we've got a lot of cars waiting for repairs in the shop right now. There's no time for a study break if my dad wants to keep his business," Wyatt said with a huff as he slammed his locker.
He didn't need this. He didn't need the reminder of all the ways his life wasn't normal. If his dad actually gave a shit then he would make Wyatt study. But he didn't. It only mattered that Wyatt was at least narrowly passing so that he could graduate.
Lucy sighed and placed a gentle hand on his arm. "Wyatt, it's okay, really. I just...you seem to like that class a lot and I want you to do well. That's all. Forget I said anything."
"I want to do well too," he told her as he dropped his book bag to the floor and leaned his back against his closed locker. He was feeling over extended. He needed to be too many things to too many people and he was tired. He was tired of a lot of things. In that moment, he was also tired of keeping it to himself. Maybe that's why he said what he said next. "But sometimes picking up my dad's slack has to come first. I can only do so much at one time. You know? I have to pick one and the choice that keeps the roof over our heads is the choice I have to make."
He could feel the concern in her stare. He didn't glance over because he didn't want to see it. He couldn't handle it. No one had worried about him since he left Texas.
Lucy's hand moved from his arm to grasp his wrist. She used that grip to pull him down the hall and into the empty auditorium. He had no idea what she was up to but he wasn't going to fight her on it. When they came to a stop in the back of the auditorium, she didn't say a word, didn't even look him in the eye. She simply wrapped her arms around him. Both her arms folded around his neck and pulled him to her as she rested her chin on his shoulder.
He was frozen like an idiot who had never been hugged before. Of course he had but not since he was a young child and his mother was still…
That wasn't important. The present issue was what the hell was he supposed to do with his arms? Jessica wasn't a hugger. They did a lot of other things but he was most definitely out of practice with hugging.
"I'm sorry, Wyatt," Lucy said softly as she kept a steady hold on him. "You shouldn't have to feel like the whole world is on your shoulders. Not at sixteen."
He couldn't have stopped his sharp inhale of breath at those words, even if he wanted to. He didn't even know that was something he needed to hear. How did she?
His arms went around her back and tucked her further into him as desperately as a drowning man gasping for air. It was like she was the warmth and comfort he knew he needed but never thought he'd get. Despite his better judgement, he sunk into the embrace. He didn't reply to her. He didn't need to. She knew what him reciprocating her gesture meant. He was allowing himself to literally lean on her. That was more trust than he had given anyone other than Bam-Bam in years.
Lucy Preston was going to tear his world apart, wasn't she? Well, then maybe that was what he needed. Maybe he needed someone to help him burn it all down and start over. Maybe he needed her.
The bell rang causing them to separate much too soon. They pulled away from each other slowly. There was a moment of tension as his cheek brushed hers. It would be so easy to turn his head and press his lips to hers…
No. No. He really needed to snuff out this attraction to her. She wasn't his type. He would ruin her. He needed to stick to the girls who were almost as broken as he was. Not the nerdy goody two shoes with the warm cinnamon eyes who made him feel like he actually mattered.
Damn it.
