FLASHBACK
10 months after they had lost Nathaniel they tried to get pregnant again. Holly hadn't taken much convincing over the whole 'getting pregnant' thing. Gail had asked her on several occasions if this was something that she was sure she wanted to do and Holly's answer was always the same "Yes, I am doing this for us so people can see that our love has made something beautiful." It was always said with love in her eyes with the hint of sadness that was Nathaniel.
There wasn't a day that went by that they both didn't think about Nate, but with each day it got a lot easier to understand. The first month was the hardest, for both Gail and Holly. It took a while for Gail to come to terms with the fact that she was never going to carry a child again, but it never hurt as much as loosing their son.
She stilled blamed herself for what happened and Holly could see that, and whenever she could see Gail gazing off somewhere she would kiss her fully on the lips and say "I love you." and Gail would return back to reality.
Getting pregnant the second time was hard. Holly had never been in tune with her body, and trying to get pregnant was driving her insane, but Gail was doing everything she could to help. Steve had basically begged them to let him help with having another baby, he wanted to give them hope and of course Gail an Holly had accepted straight away, finding a donor was the worst part of the getting pregnant.
They spent hours in the doctors surgery waiting for a yes or a no, until one night, while she was washing the dishes from their dinner, Gail said the one thing that made so much sense.
"Lunchbox"
Holly looked up from the book she was reading at the breakfast bar.
"Hmmm..."
"I have been thinking..."
"Don't try to hard you might pull something." Holly smirked and Gail rolled her eyes.
Gail walked over to Holly spun the stool around so she was facing her and stood between her legs.
"Can you be serious for like...I don't know...five minutes." Gail said.
"Isn't that usually my line."
"Please..." Gail said with a serious look and Holly knew that she wasn't in the mood to be teased.
"Okay I'm listening." Holly took Gail's hand in hers and placed a kiss on her palm then placed both their hands on her knee.
"It has been a few months of trying."
"Tell me something I don't know."
"Hols please just let me finish." Gail waited for a remark back.
When did I become the serious one Gail thought.
"Okay so what I thought was...what if we tried here, at home, in our own bed, no doctors, well except for you obvious." She smiled. "Just me and you and no florescent lights."
Holly thought about the idea for a few seconds.
"Hols what do you think?"
"Sounds like a brilliant idea to me." She pulled Gail down to sit on her knee and Gail placed a kiss on the top of her head.
"I am full of great ideas Lunchbox, you have been with me for nearly five years and you haven't realised it yet. Shame on you."
Holly reached up and kissed Gail.
"Your best idea ever was purposing to me." She smiled.
"God I love you." Gail said as she bent down again to kiss Holly with passion. "You know it's two weeks until our anniversary, how about we do it then?"
"Sounds good to me Detective." Ever since Gail's promotion at work, Holly had upgraded her nickname for the blonde to Detective, and Gail loved it.
"You know he would have been 10 months old nearly." Holly said.
"I know." Gail tried to hold back the tears.
"I always think what it would be like if he was here with us. If he would have your blue eyes and pale skin. If his eyebrows do that thing that yours do when you look at me as if I am crazy." Gail laughed through the tears. "You amaze me Gail you know that, you are the strongest person I know. Through all this...this...shit that you have been through over the past year, you still have so much love in you." Holly cupped Gail's cheek with her hand.
"I got through it all because of you, we are a team now Hols. Plus one forever remember...you promised." She smiled.
TWO WEEKS LATER
She wanted everything to be perfect, she a laid candles out in their bedroom...everywhere. Holly would be home from work soon and there would be dinner waiting for her when she did. Gail had left work early so she could set everything up and told Holly she couldn't pick her up from work as she had to nip to her mom's, which was the worst lie in history as why the hell would she choose to go and see her.
She'd drove to collect the stuff she need to make Holly's favourite meal and her favourite bottle of wine and stopped by the sperm bank to collect the...well the obvious. She thought it was disgusting and tried not to think about it but not before taking a photo and sending it to Steve saying "Cheers brother *sick face*."
Holly would be home in half hour and everything was nearly in place, but she needed to get changed into something a little more comfortable. She had chosen her red dress that Holly loved her in, it showed just the right amount of boobs and made her bum and legs look amazing. She placed her hair up in a bun, now it was longer again she could, and applied some red lipstick.
"Perfect." She gathered herself and walked down stairs just as she could hear the keys turn in the door. She pressed play on her iPod and waited, but Holly didn't come in.
"What the hell." Walking to the front door she could hear Holly muttering to herself.
Gail opened the door slowly to see Holly crouched down picking up some flowers with hands full of bags.
"What are you doing Lunchbox."
"Was trying to surprise you and then I dropped the roses and then I..." Holly stopped to look up and saw Gail and the words didn't seem to come out anymore.
"You was saying." Gail smirked knowing full well Holly liked what she saw.
"Wow you look...sorry just...wow you look beautiful." She seemed to forget what she was originally doing and stood to kiss her wife.
"Watch my lipstick, my wife will be home soon."
"Oh really...well I can't help it...you look amazing honey." Holly glanced over Gail's shoulder and saw all the hard work Gail had done. "You are kind of perfect you know that right."
"Oh I know."
They managed to get inside and Holly just couldn't stop staring at Gail.
"I wanted to make everything special, so your favourite bottle of red is in the fridge, and dinner is in the oven ready to be served." Holly walked over to Gail and put her arms around her neck. Gail welcomed her and placed her arms around her waist.
"Happy anniversary honey." Holly kissed Gail on the lips.
"Happy anniversary, tonight is going to be one to remember forever."
