To pre-empt any complaining (valid or not) about the vitriolic nature of the first snippet in this one; while I do realize that its content reeks of what is termed 'ship bashing', I wish to present the counter-argument that ship-bashing refers more to demonizing either person in the couple and/or making them express hatred for one another, whereas the incident alluded to has happened, without it being an exaggerated or distorted account on either her or my part.

I further wish to make it clear that any spite expressed therein is in no way intended for anyone in this fandom who do ship them, only towards the crap-pairing itself. All this is intended to do is help me vent my recently-acquired disdain for it while having Crystal remain (at least relatively) in-character.

All the same, I hope that you enjoy reading these snippets.


MangaQuestShipping

Yet another one mostly improvised

She couldn't pretend that Gold was utterly an asshole (he had good qualities, even if they weren't always there to see), but on the whole, she wouldn't complain if she just never saw him or talked to him again in her life.

Blue had just looked knowingly at her, when she had been told that. The raven-haired teen wondered if Blue had chalked that sentiment up to her being one of these messed-up women who masked romantic attraction behind bitter antipathy, like in every fifth trashy romance novel. It honestly irked her to be thought of as one of those cliches.

The raven-haired inclined her head, wondering if telling Blue that he had almost caused her a fiery death without the slightest bit of remorse once would shake that look off her face. It certainly had with Green.

She felt her lips tug up in a smirk. She knew it wasn't a very pleasant thing and that it wasn't worthwhile holding on to old grudges, but Green going through the trouble of roughing Gold up a bit after she'd mentioned the Typhlosion incident was nice of the Gym Leader - getting even for the near-death experience felt, in spite of herself, pretty good.


PoliShipping

Imagine person A and person B go out to some kind of bar and try playing some pool. Person B isn't very good at it while person A is. Person A helps out Person B and teaches them how to play.

The twenty-one-year-old focused on the ball, readying the rod that he held; the shaft gripped securely in his right hand, the tip poking out from his fingers down on the table. With a forceful motion, Red made the break shot.

The cue ball shot forward, delivering a glancing blow to the yellow-colored one ball that laid at the front of the stack. Their arrangement was shaken around, but not yet broken, Red observed. He wasn't an expert in this game, but that didn't look good for him tactically. "Remind me again, I've got the... solids, right, and I'm supposed to get them into one of the holes before you can get the striped ones in?"

"Yep," smirked Gold, and extended his hand. Red handed the Johtonian the cue. "Awright, watch a pro at work," he boasted, and began to move. "Ya may be the Champion of the Pokemon League, but I'm the champion of the pool table."

Gold stopped before the center-right hole, moving into position. With the sort of skill that was acquired rather than inherited, he made the shot. The ball rolled into the larger stack, scattering the balls further across the table. Then, he handed the cue back to the Kantonian.


ButtShipping

Imagine your OTP(+) at breakfast the next morning after a night of kinky sex

Gold watched, eyes glued to her, as Blue casually munched down on a slice of bread.

Though she was still naked from the night's events, with her chest proudly on display, the Breeder couldn't find the sight to be hot or sexy or arousing in any way. Weird as it was, it felt pretty much normal that they ate breakfast naked. It wasn't the first time he had ever eaten breakfast with a woman in the buff, but it was the first that it felt boring.

Figuring that there was no reason to put that question off, Gold went right ahead and asked.

The brunette spoke his name, a vaguely amused glint in her ocean-colored orbs. "Gold, care to recall every place your dick visited last night, and I do mean every place? Do you really think I would bother putting clothes on, just for breakfast?"

Gold flashed her a smirk. Dazed memories of the previous evening, and the two-person orgy between her mouth and his dick, played in his mind. That settled it for him: Blue liked to travel, loved sex as much as he did, was a good drinking buddy, a top-notch trainer (he could appreciate a woman who could kick his ass), witty, funny, fun-loving, beautiful, intelligent, had (unlike a lot of the women he knew) patience longer than a grass-straw.

He gazed fondly at her, certain that he had just found his new benefits-friend.


PreciousMetalShipping

Imagine Person A having a dream about making out with Person B and then awaking very confused.

The raven-haired teenager pressed his lips against those of the scarlet-haired male, absently noting their dry taste. Sensing no resistance, the Breeder deepened the kiss, moving his tongue in. Thus began a short and forceful duel between their respective tongues.

Gold awoke with a gasp. "What the hell?"

Then he felt the heat of the room, and a particularly intense heat coming from next to him. Slowly, Gold turned his head to the left. He saw Silver, recognizing him immediately by the hair's shade of red. The red-head was on fire, staring directly into his eyes, stark-naked. Gold screamed.

Gold awoke, again. Breathing quickened, he felt his heart pound almost painfully. "What the hell was that about?"